Hello! New chapter! Sorry for the delay. I had a crazy week.

This chapter is kind of intense.

Thank you for all your favorites, for your reviews, and for the silent readers!

As I asked in the last chapter if you see any mistake at all: being orthographic or grammar please please do not hesitate to point them out, They are really useful to me!

I know that some sentences said by Chelsea might be wrongly spoken, but I kind of imagine her talking like that, she is six, so she is still learning the speech pattern.

THE GHOSTS OF MY LIFE

Chapter six: My history.

It was Sam's turn to pick up Chelsea again. His sister and brother in law had finally registered Sam as a backup, so everything could go legally well, otherwise my duty command me to not let her go with anyone but her parents. The first time we met Ángela told me that it was fine for her to go with Sam, they knew each other and Emily had talked to her, that's why I didn't have any conflicting issues letting both go. This time Sam let me know that he might be coming a little late due to his rounds of patrolling. I told him it was no problem at all to stay with Chelsea for a bit longer.

The little girl was reading happily in her little spot at her table while I cleaned the room and put a little bit of order around. I always liked to do it and Angela was more than happy to let me.

I was inspired by rearranging everything as Ángela had asked me to. I actually thought it was a better system, but I didn't mind the other order. One would think that having a good time rearranging things would make an organized person, but I was not; my house sometimes was a mess, and my bedroom too.

Chelsea came up to me and congratulated me on my birthday. I looked at her confused. It was late october. My birthday was in September. "Honey today is not my birthday".

She looked kind of sad and confused. "But...the ol' man tell me it is."

I looked at her and then at Harry. Harry shrugged looking smug. This demonstrated our early theories about Chelsea being able to see him. Until today I still thought we were seeing things that weren't actually there; as I once said: kids liked to draw about everything, and not always it meant what the adults thought. I sighed and decided to sit down with her and have this talk.

"Chels. You know that this man who told you it was my birthday is a really nice old man. But so far, you and I are the only ones who can see him." I stopped and she nodded in understanding. "You can speak to him sometimes when no one is around, or if I am around because not everyone understands why there are some people able to see those who are not with us anymore. Do you understand what I'm trying to say?"I really hoped she did. It was difficult to explain this to her, but I knew I had to.

"I understand."

I smiled. "I like to call them ghosts, even though they are not like on the tv." She giggled. "You might see more people. Some are going to be very nice, some might not be so nice and some might be really evil. But no matter who you see, you don't have to be afraid of them. They can't hurt you" She opened her eyes widely at the mention of evil ghosts. I had had my fair share of those.

"Evil?" She whispered and her eyes watered a little.

I sighed. "Yes, Chelsea. Do you remember what we talked this week? Remember that we are going to the park and to the aquarium?"She nodded. We were teaching them about strangers and security. "Do you remember that we told you that you should not trust all the strangers that come up to you?" She nodded again. "That's because there are bad people. Bad people don't do good things. The same goes for the ghosts. There a bad ghosts who would speak ugly, or that would yell, but just remember, that they can't hurt you"

She let out a sigh of relief. I allowed myself to let one out too.

Harry was mute, something unlike him. He was watching Chelsea with a look of concern on his face. I know that this was necessary, this time, ignorance wasn't bliss.

"You are good ol' man?" It was actually funny how she referred to Harry as an old man.

Harry tapped her nose making her giggle. "I am very good, little one. Don't worry." Chelsea looked at me for reassurance.

"He is good." I hesitated to decide if I should tell her who he really was. It would probably make her feel safer. "Do you know Leah and Seth Clearwater?"

"Yes. Leah is pwetty, and Seth funny" I smiled.

"Well, Harry here" I pointed at the ghost "Is Leah's and Seth's dad."

She opened her mouth in surprise. I was hoping she didn't decide to ask why their dad was dead. It would be a hard lesson and she was just a little girl. Some things are meant to be left alone.

Sam texted me letting me know he was parking his car. "Chelsea. Remember that not everyone is open to strange things. We have to keep it a secret for now. I will talk to your mommy and daddy and Uncle Sammy sometime next week, but for now, we can't say a word... Alright?" I hated telling my pupils to keep secrets from their parents.

"Secwet. Promise" She said and hugged me.

"Your uncle Sam is here."I announced just as Sam knocked on the classroom door.

He greeted both of us with a kiss on the cheek. Today was our big day. Well, our big day would be our wedding day, so calling our first date the big day was outstretching. Either way, I walked with him to the parking lot and parted ways. He would be picking me up in two hours.

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I looked at Harry worriedly but thankful "That was a clever way to find out if she saw" He shrugged. "No, really. Thank you for doing it. It might have been dangerous if we waited longer."

"I just felt like she had to know. I caught her today following me with her eyes. No other kid did that. So I took a risk. She seemed alright with it. Do you think she will be good with everything you explained?"

I sighed and shrugged. I didn't know. She was so innocent. "I really don't know. She took it very well. I think that you being from the Rez like her made it less traumatic for her. It's hard to know. I'll probably tell Sam today. I wouldn't want to start a relationship with this hanging over our heads."

"You will tell him? Even when you just told Chelsea you would keep it a secret?"

"I have to tell him, for me at least. On one side I don't want this secret to be between us. And on the other side, it might be good for Chelsea. I will ask him to keep it to himself until monday. On monday I will talk to Emily or John or both and ask for an appointment to discuss this." He nodded. It made sense in my head. I was after all her teacher. I had to put my feelings aside. I hoped, though, that they didn't judge or at least not so strongly. They had their own legends. It was more plausible to see ghosts than to change into wolves. I shouldn't tell them that because that might get me on the wrong side. I would simply tell we were both sides of the same coin. I really hoped they didn't think I was crazy or influencing their little daughter into my craziness.

"You put too much pressure on yourself. It's going to be good. I will be there. We can ask Alison to be there too. We can ask her to say things that only Emily would know and have Chelsea tell them." It was actually a good idea.

"I believe that can work." I was more optimistic about everything now that I...we had a more solid plan now.

Growing up I didn't have any mentor telling me to be afraid or to not be afraid of whatever was happening to me. I suffered bullying when I was around Chelsea's age. I would answer a question or laugh at a joke and kids would pick on me calling me all sorts of things; weirdo, witch, crazy girl, amongst other insults. I learned the hard way to hide who I was, what I could do. Once or twice an old woman or an old man would catch me talking to someone unseen to them and wouldn't judge. I came to the conclusion, although weakly, that it was often the older people who committed fewer judgments on the weird things. That gave me solace.

Whenever I told my mom that someone was speaking to her and she was being rude by not paying attention she would quickly divert the subject or ignore my comment. I now know that she was uncomfortable with me seeing ghosts, she actually took me to a psychologist, but I refused to talk. After my first appointment with him, I decided I would never tell a soul outside my immediate family about it. They wouldn't understand, they would mock me and hurt me. It was hard growing up as the weird kid. My mom never pressured me into going again to therapy, she understood I wouldn't budge. We developed a relationship where we would tiptoe around the subject especially while I was little. I don't remember well, but she assured me once I was older, that some things I said were really scary and she was more afraid for me than of me. We then sat and talked long and truthfully about it. After that time, she never asked me anything anymore, and I respected her decision by not volunteering any information.

With age came maturity. I understood that not everyone was as understanding as my mother or my dad, who actually surprised me by asking for specifics from time to time, or asking if I was scared of anything I saw. With maturity came responsibility, some ghosts were just passing through, they didn't want to be held on by anything, so I was responsible enough to not interfere with anyone who didn't ask specifically for my help. Some others were stuck and wanted to pass on a message. Other ghosts were just looking after someone or waiting for a significant other to pass away. Obviously, I had to approach these ghosts in order to find out. It is so rare having this gift, that they didn't engage in a conversation unless talked to. I know for a fact that there are people out there who can see things and hear them, or just hear them, and be in denial. I had gone through a lot before becoming the person I am today.

Then the news arrived. I was living with my mom as arranged when I was a baby. My dad would be marrying Sue Clearwater, the really nice lady he had been dating for a year. Her kids and I were close and we became closer after my dad married. I found comfort hearing the legends of the tribe, they made me feel less alone. For once I wasn't the weird girl that might laugh out loud when no one spoke. They just accepted me for who I was.

Then the bad times arrived. I had been having a hard time, there were dark entities ambushing me, stalking me, and making me very nervous. It was a year where I barely could sleep, I lost weight, my feeding habits changed drastically, It was actually that summer; I was nineteen years old and came to visit Dad -he had been married for one year-, he could sense and see that something was wrong with me. I quickly put his mind at ease, excusing my behavior as college stress and nothing else.

Seth didn't buy my speech, he confronted me and accused me of using drugs or surrendering to alcoholism or something like that. I remember telling him I wished it was that easy. He demanded to know what was wrong with me. We had been best friends for two years. I finally gave and told him everything. It was a dark time in my life. That was the summer I lost my virginity to him. He held me after we had sex and told me to ignore the bad things, to focus only on the good things going on around me. He listened to me the days after, he asked questions, even hard ones, he never hesitated, he let me get it all out, he let me scream and kick and cry and curse. That was the best moment of my life. The freedom I felt afterward was addicting. He promised me he would never let anything hurt me, nor a guy, nor a girl, not our parents, or my mom, or even an evil ghost.

Seth has been my rock, my everything since I was seventeen years old. He looked after me the same way he looked after Leah. After we established that there were no romantic feelings in the mix we became closer than ever. We only had sex that one time and it never happened again. Leah found out about it a few months later and by accident, but after being reassured over and over again she let the subject die.

I don't know exactly what made the evil spirits leave me. The fact that they could no longer feed on my bad emotions, or my low self-esteem or my fear of them, whatever it was, it was really present until today because no other evil anima has ever come near me again. Granted, there were still some angry ghosts out there, and a few have crossed my path but I never gave them the power or the strength to undermine me again.

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The ringing of the bell brought me back to the present. I shout an "I'm coming" and rushed to finish my mascara and put my shoes on.

I ran to the door and in my front porch was a smiling Sam waiting for him. He had a sunflower with him, he extended the yellow flower to my direction and I took it smiling. It was really beautiful.

"Thank you for the flower. I will put it in water and we can go" He nodded.

I quickly put the beautiful yellow flower on a glass of water, took my purse and rejoined Sam at the door.

"Ready?" He asked offering his hand.

"Ready." I smiled.

Any of you ever wondered in what circumstances Bella and Seth had sex together? Well, here it is.

Siobhan Withlock said in her review that seeing as Sam sensed Alison that he would take the news well. As I told her, that part isn't even thought of yet, I might improvise when the time comes. I accept ideas, would he be all accepting like Seth, or freak out at least a little bit?

Thank you for your kind and warm welcoming to this craziness!

Paty4Hale

23.09.18