Wind was whistling stronger in my ears the closer the grass got. That fall seemed to last an eternity already as I took a look at the grey sky, and wondered. Should I call Plagg, or would it be for the best if someone else took my place?
The more I was thinking, the more this masquerade sounded like a theatre play. Yet now I was an aged tired comedian, I can't bear the weight of my mission no more. Maybe Magma Doll will be a better Chat Noir?
An aged tired comedian, that's what i saw in front of the mirror, as nineteen as I was. How droll, I am so young yet so desperate for inner peace. Everyone gave up on me one after the other.
I heard a very close voice screaming my name, yet it seemed so far. That's when i transformed without even emitting the will to do so verbally. Time took back, I was no more alone with my thoughts : I rolled on the ground to catch up from my fall, then laid miserably down on the ground.
My de-transformation was immediate as Plagg jumped on me in a failed attempt to punch my head.
« What did you just try to do, Adrien?! »
I looked away, my words missing. There was no explanation I guess. Why did i threw myself from the window? Because I wanted it, maybe. That sounded like the most rational thing to do at this instant. I looked up the sky again, but the windows of my bedroom were blocking him.
That was the only thing I could have done, right?
« Plagg, I don't want to be Chat Noir anymore. »
His pupils widened at my words and his tail softly fell back, dazed.
« What? But- Adrien! You can't just give up on your role!
- I'll take the ring to Ladybug, she'll know who to give it to. I hope they will be nice to you.
- No Adrien, wai-! »
I slid the ring from my finger as Plagg bounced on my hand to prevent me from doing so; too late, he just disappeared in a smoky cloud. I was alone, again.
I slowly stood up from my numbed legs, and staggered to the front of the villa. I now had to go back to my Lady.
Finding her back wasn't an easy quest, I wandered everywhere asking around passerbies if they hadn't spot her flying away from one roof to the other since she left my home. I mean, my ex-home.
Walking around in isolated streets of where I thought her apartment was, hoping she'd lean at a window to smile at me with her bright eyes. But instead I crossed the path of another familiar face at the corner of one of these tall buildings.
« Alya?
- Adrien? What are you doing here? »
My eyes looked away the time I found a convenable excuse, but when I opened my lips she immediately stopped me.
« No lies, Agreste. »
Her sharp gaze froze me a second.
« I'm… Looking for Ladybug, to give her that... »
Upon my words, I opened the palm of my hand holding the black destruction ring for her to look at. She gasped before quickly recovering it with both her hands to close my fingers and dig the ring back in there.
« Why are you doing this?
- I'm not… Good. Not anymore. »
It surprised me she didn't even ask anything, not about me, not about the ring. I just told her who I really was, yet the only thing I could read in her eyes was pity.
« Keep it Adrien, you are Chat Noir. Paris wouldn't be the same without your help.
- Alya, you can't get it… You're not the one having to bear the weight of two millions lives.
- If you knew. »
I didn't understand what she was implying, as she quickly reached out her sweater collar to dig out a necklace from it; But it wasn't a regular necklace, I took a few seconds before recognizing it. The fox miraculous.
« This isn't an imitation. I'm Rena Rouge. »
I didn't know what to answer, as it all made sense all of sudden. Her not being surprised, and her supportive words. I watched her get back her necklace within her pullover before sticking her gaze right into my eyes.
« Did anything happen while I was gone? Where's Ladybug?
- I… I'm searching for her, actually. She's just... »
I scratched the side of my arm, embarrassed and defeated by the situation. Was it necessary to tell Alya everything? It was partly my fault if Ladybug fled, she's gonna hate me.
« What do you mean? Is she gone?
- Something happened, and I couldn't catch her that she already left! »
My voice went up without even me noticing, and I spotted a few odd looks from people around us. I wasn't screaming at Alya, nor at Ladybug. Only against myself.
« I see… I guess if she had any problem she would have called me, or Magma for that matter. She must be fine, don't worry, she probably just need a bit of time for herself.
- Do you know where she lives?
- Of course not, you know the rules with her! »
I sighed, thinking that it definitely wasn't a good time for her to hide somewhere. If I couldn't find her, maybe I should deliver the ring to our master then.
« Come on, put back that ring on your finger and stop crying around. It's not by fleeing your responsibilities that you'll succeed anything. »
She smiled. Was it supposed to be a joke? I felt bad about it, so I nervously laughed in another deep sigh.
« Okay, sure…
- Hey, what if i called Nino to go in town? It'd help us change our mind, like the old times.
- Isn't that a bit sudden? I have other stuffs to do, and-
- I'll also call Marinette, been a while i haven't seen her! »
She didn't even listen. It's not like I didn't want to go out - but i quickly had to give back the ring before another incident happen and I'd have to go face Ladybug again as if nothing happened. Her phone already in her hands, she was furiously typing on it.
« Alya, I-
- Adrien Agreste, stop preventing me from helping you smile and relax a bit. When was the last time you didn't just took time for yourself? »
I stayed silent, trying to remember. It's been ages I haven't thought about anything but work, my father, saving the city, and Ladybug. I used to enjoy going around with Nino, didn't I?
« That's what I thought. So today let's forget all that, okay? We're gonna have fun, I promise! Just like when you used to tell your father you were gonna work at Nino's, while in fact we all were hanging out at that waffle bar. Remember? That was the good time! »
I remembered. Everything seemed so simple back then when Hawk Moth's threat wasn't as serious as it is today.
« You win. Just an afternoon. »
She vigorously smiled in a victorious manner before sinking back in her phone without waiting.
Marinette; It's been years I hadn't heard that name. I still talked once or twice a month to Nino to keep in touch, but I never was too close to her in comparison. I guess she's simply always been "Alya's friend" in my mind.
« They're coming! We're meeting at the Champ Elysées in twenty minutes to eat at Waldonald.
- But we're at the other side of the city, aren't we? »
She quickly caught my hand in hers and smiled brightly to lead me in the opposite direction, laughing.
« Then, let's run! »
We arrived way too late after passing through at least thousands of busses and subways. Alya's excitement was strangely contagious and I couldn't deny it, she really had her ways to make me feel myself. Obviously I still felt heavy from all my responsibilities, but it was nice to change my mind a bit.
We arrived completely out of breath to the meeting point under Nino's amused glance who arrived here a long while ago.
« You had me waiting!
- Sorry guy, she thought we'd transform in Flash on the way here. »
We laughed, as i spotted Marinette arriving in the corner of my eye.
She had changed. As I remembered she was always wearing these two ponytails on the back of her hairs and that tiny white top that wasn't really looking great on her, yet now her short hairs made her look so mature and adult. Her blue eyes were also looking just as optimistic as I remembered them.
She looked just like Ladybug, I thought with a pinch on my heart. But I smiled and waved at her.
« Hey Marinette, it's been a while!
- Eheh, A-Adrien? Alya, why didn't you tell me Adrien was comming…? »
Her eyes switched between my face and hers, she looked confused and discontented to see me there. Was I unwelcome?
« Oh, you… Didn't want to see me? If I knew I wouldn't have come, sorry... »
I nervously laughed, but Nino quickly patted my shoulder in a comforting gesture. I couldn't see it, but I guess Alya was throwing one of her dark looks to Marinette.
« N-No! I never said that! Sorry, It just… Caught me off guard! I thought you were out of the town? Afterall aren't you such a big international supermodel guy living in America right now, or whatever?
- Not really, I can't leave Paris. »
My answer got her satisfied, she sighed.
« Marinette, are you hurt? »
Alya suddenly jumped on her while grabbing her cheeks, gently wiping a scratch from the tip of her nose.
« Oh, it's nothing, I was caught in the middle of the Akuma's incident the other day but nothing really serious happened, ahah! »
She was laughing, yet her gaze was getting lost away. I didn't notice Marinette in the crowd of the people I helped fleeing the other day, I would have recognized her immediately. Why was she lying?
Alya simply patted the top of her friend's head.
« How on earth do you always end up in the middle of these? It's like you're a black cat or something! »
Marinette pulled out her tongue before sincerely smiling. My doubts were vanishing, I simply pointed fingers to the Wacdonalds.
« Let's go eat something now, okay?
- Sure! »
We all stepped to enter in the noisy building smelling like fried oil and sweat.
« Luka? »
Marinette rushed to the counters to check on one of her friends, seemingly. He was wearing the green uniform and smiled strongly at her.
« What are you doing here?
- Marinette, I missed you! I'm trying to get some money besides to go in New York next summer, what about you? »
I looked at him from head to feet; He looked like some sort of punk. Blue dyed hairs, piercings, tall with a growing beard. So that was her type?
They were talking in their corner, Alya and Nino had joined the conversation. They seemed to all know each other, and I already started feeling isolated after only a minute.
« And him? Who's he? »
He threw an eye at me as I crossed my arms, trying to look taller. But god was he tall.
« I'm Adrien. »
His eyebrow stood up as he smiled from surprise; at least he recognized me.
« You mean, you're the guy on these damsel perfume? »
I winced, and they all silently laughed right in front of my face. I could see it. Did he just mocked me in front of my friends?
« Maybe I'm a model on perfume, but at least I gain my life without being a fast food server. »
They all stopped laughing as that Luka, with a ridiculously expressive face, frowned.
« What you searching for, there?
- Luka, calm down! He was just kidding, right? »
Marinette caught his hand to help him chill, yet my hand stayed alone. Where was my Ladybug, already?
I turned around and left the place, my fists clenched on my own fingers. I heard Nino and Alya following my steps.
« Bro, what's taking you?! »
The door slammed, and the honking noises of the streets slowly woke me up. I inhaled, and exhaled. I already felt slightly better.
« Adrien?
- I'm sorry guys, I don't think I'm really hungry. »
Alya's hand rested on my shoulder for a second with compassion, as they both sighed.
« I don't know why you're reacting that way bro, Luka's a cool guy!
- Did you even notice how pretentious he was?
- He was just joking, he probably noticed you were stressed and- »
My eyes pierced Nino.
« I'm not stressed.
- Are you kidding me, you think I'm blind? You're all pretending but I know it's been years you're hiding us all this! Why aren't you telling anything to your best friend? »
Maybe because I simply could not. Alya lowered her face at least as much as I did, probably the weight of all our lies falling back on our shoulders now.
« You too Alya, you're acting just as him lately… What's happening to you guys? »
I knew I couldn't get out of this by myself, I had to spit out truth. Which one? So many things were going wrong lately.
« My father threw me out of the house. »
It felt like I dropped a bomb. Their four eyes pointed at me.
« What? Since when?
- This morning. »
My gaze waltzed between my shoes and the pavement of the street. I had nothing to say, and they didn't know what to tell me. A long silent set.
« Just… Like that? »
I nodded, yet I very well knew it wasn't "just like that". I was a failure of a son, a runaway, but also an outlaw; despite my father only knowing about half of it.
Marinette's voice reached my ears in my back after the noise of a door that opened violently.
« Adrien, what the fuck is your problem?!
- Marinette, he- »
Alya tried speaking, but the small black-haired seemed way too mad to even consider her opinion. Was that small accident making her that mad?
« Not only am I kind enough to tolerate your presence near my friends, but you also overstrain it and start being mean to my-... To Luka? »
I stayed silent.
« What's wrong with you? You've always been like that anyway since as long as I can remember, you're always messing everything up! You messed up my medium school years, you also messed up my high school years, and now you're also messing up my after school years! »
I don't know why she started screaming that loud, nor what she was even talking about. How did I messed up all that? I never did anything to her, it's barely if we even talked back then.
She was crying, I only noticed the tears rolling down her mad red cheeks. We were all stunned.
« I… I hate you! »
She burst into tears at her own words, running away in the other direction. Alya reacted first by following her immediately.
« Marinette, wait! »
She had left my shoulder that she was holding since the beginning of the conversation. I felt like we were in a cheesy tv serie.
« What the hell...? »
Nino shrugged; he didn't understand anything that just happened either, seemingly.
« Girls. Listen bro, it's sudden but I can help you around if you need a place to crash in while you're searching for something else. »
He had already changed subject in a somewhat supportive smile.
« You sure, it doesn't bother you?
- Nah, I'm always here for you. Follow me. »
I thanked him with a smile back, I think it was a sincere one this time. When he turned around I simply followed his steps.
I am glad there I had still friends to count on despite it all. Despite his doubts, despite myself. I'll thank him more once I have more time for it.
As soon as we arrived at his place, I almost jumped on the couch to lay down. It obviously wasn't the first time I came here, I was starting to get used to it. I heard steps towards the mini fridge as Nino uncapped two beers, one that he then handed me.
« Thanks a lot Nino, I'm glad we're friends.
- No problem at all! It's always nice to have you here. »
I was finally starting to feel clearer. Despite Marinette's tantrum and mister punk from the Waldo, this afternoon was nicer than I expected it to be. Spending time with my friends helped me, yet I only noticed it right now thanks to Alya.
Nino caught the remote control and turned on his 24" screen, first falling on the national news.
« Isn't that your father? »
His face was taking the entire screen space, circled by dozens of journalists and microphones as he was getting out of the villa.
« People are saying Adrien Agreste, your son, ran away. Is that true?
- Stop wasting my time. »
His crisping voice in the middle of all these questions had me gnashing. I threw an eye away as Nino turned off the TV.
« Sorry, bro.
- Not your fault. »
I looked at the window behind the couch. The air outside had a soft grapefruit color, it was already evening.
« You don't mind if i go to sleep right now? I'm exhausted, these days weren't the most restful of my life.
- No problem, mi casa es tu casa. I'm right next door if you need anything, okay guy?
- Thanks. »
I waved as he walked to his bedroom, laying lazily down on the couch afterwards. It wasn't really comfortable, but at least I had a place to sleep at.
My eyes glanced at the sky again, barely visible through the buildings of the city. I was lucky to have friends such as Nino and Alya, I realised once again, even if she probably was only nice to convince me into keeping that darn ring. I'll still have to find Ladybug, anyway.
What day were we already? Maybe i could go in patrol tonight for the last time and go talk to her. I'll have to wait for the moon to set up.
I closed my eyes for a second, yet sleep immediately caught on me.
My sleep got shortened. Screams outside were hitting on my eardrums, and as I looked past the window i noticed people running away in fear. Again?
I opened the glass as a strong wind blew in. I noticed other heads leaning on their balconies, badly exhausted faces. An heavy running crowd had formed down in the streets, some men were dropping dead in the middle.
Only men?
I set my two feet on the border of the window, facing the wind and glancing at the emptiness under my toes. I almost lost my grip, catching myself on the border of the frame at head level, leaning even more to notice where all this was coming from, job conditioning. Two huge spotlights were comming from the corners of the street, and I noticed a short haired woman only wearing a flashy pink bodysuit hysterically laughing.
« What are you going to do now, trash?! »
A psychopath feminist? Great, just what Paris needed at the moment.
I was about to transform, yet… I remembered I wasn't wearing the ring anymore. I felt an itch in my pocket where it was resting, yet I made a promise to myself. I won't interfere against akumas again.
Pressing my foot against one of the building decorations, I lifted myself up on the wall to climb, direction to the rooftop. I'll probably spot Ladybug arriving from there, but climbing with normal clothes was a pain as my hands were getting scratched and my feet slipped on my own pants.
Yet, I finally arrived up there. That's only then that I noticed Ladybug running in my back to my field of view. She was breathless, she probably ran from the other side of Paris.
« Ladybug, I was searching for you!
- Chat? What are you waiting for, get in your costume! »
I quickly sinked my hand in my pocket to take out and hand her the ring, catching her fingers to plunge it in.
« My lady, you have to find something better than I am.
- Adrien? »
She seemed surprise, but I tried to look assured.
« Give that ring to Magma Doll, or maybe anyone else. It doesn't matter, I know you'll make a good choice, at least a better one than me.
- No Adrien! »
Her shout seemed sincere, and my heart skipped a bit. Why was she always like that? How could she always make me doubt of my own feelings?
« Adrien, I… I didn't know for your father, they say at TV that you ran away or that you tried to kill yourself, and… I'm really sorry i acted the way I did, it was childish and unfair, i gave you so many worries. But right now, I need you! You have to put that ring on your finger, I can't do anything without my Chat Noir. »
She didn't wait a second, her arms were closing in my back in a dear embrace. Tears were flowing from my eyes already as my heartbeat rushed. I had to do it, just for her, at least one last time.
She let me go after a minute before looking at me right in the eyes, sliding her thumb on my cheeks to dry the pearls.
« Adrien, are you following me? »
I looked back before answering.
« Anywhere, my Lady. »