I happen to have off today.

Also, DON'T THROW OFF MY GROOVE

They were all sitting in the basement, surrounding a small table full of cards.

"Uno!" Naruto cried. His blond hair bounced in excitement as he thrust the card into the sky. He was grinning like an idiot, but Itachi was right beside him and he raised his brow. He had the perfect card with which to turn his mood.

Sasuke smacked his arm. "We can all hear you idiot, you don't have to shout like you're dying." Naruto just grinned, lowering his arm. The others didn't really react, though Hinata did smile. Sakura was too distracted by the warmth Itachi was giving off and Neji and Tenten were off in a different corner of the room, talking among themselves. They were playing a game of chess, a decidedly boring game that Naruto didn't want to watch. He had dragged the card came out of the depths of a dusty shelf that Sakura hadn't even remembered was there.

When it came to Itachi's turn, he laid the card down and watched Naruto's facue fall.

"Aw, man, come on," he whined. He pulled two cards. Then, he pulled more. He hadn't gotten the color he needed until he drew the fifth. He sighed and dropped it. The game went around again. "At least this is more fun than being upstairs," he wrinkled his nose.

"You always found family boring," Sakura commented lightly as she laid her card down. "I remember being told of one fourth of July when you decided it would be much more fun to set fireworks off in the backyard without supervision."

"We were fine! No one died," Naruto scoffed.

"We were six."

"I don't think that matters," he pouted and took his turn.

"Do you have any other games?" Hinata asked. She didn't mind this game all that much, but it was boring to her. It didn't take much thought to lay down cards.

"I think we have monopoly," Sakura said. She was hoping this game was over soon too. The only person that was really excited was Naruto. The rest of them had to stop from rolling their eyes when he'd dug it out.

"We have that one game with the dice too," Naruto said. Everyone gave him a puzzled look, wondering what he meant. There were a lot of games with dice. "You know the one! With the cup and the dice. You shake it and see if you can get the right number..." he trailed off. He obviously didn't remember the game though he'd probably seen it when he'd gone digging for this one.

Itachi raised a brow again. "Do you mean Yahtzee?" he asked.

"That one," Naruto pointed at him, the large smile still on his face.

"Uno," Sasuke said.

"Aw man!" he flopped back into his seat, a brown cloth recliner that had seen better days. He had been so happy to know he was so close to winning, but he was sure Sasuke was going to. The other boy always won, even at these easy games Naruto didn't have to actually apply much strategy to.

"Let this be over quickly," Sakura deadpanned. Naruto glared.

"You didn't have to play," he whined.

"You'd hold it against me for a week," she shrugged. She laid down another card. She herself only had three left. "I wasn't about to take that gamble," she gave him a sneaky smile and he only scoffed.

"You're lying!"

"You once asked me to help you get a kite out of a tree," Sasuke began flatly. "When I said no you didn't talk to me for a week and a half. We were twelve."

"I really liked that kite!"

"I remember one instance when you attempted to beg me into going to a carnival without our parents knowing," Neji said across the room. He couldn't help but want to chime in to embarrass the boy. "You wanted Hinata to go and therefore asked me to come with her, thinking our parents would be less angry. When I said no, you ignored me for almost a month. I believe you were ten and I was twelve at the time."

"You're just a party pooper," Naruto wrinkled his nose and stuck his tongue out at the other boy.

"I didn't even know that happened," Hinata said. Sasuke had won, but he didn't want to interrupt the Naruto shaming and had stayed silent. They were still going in a circle, trying to see if they could get Naruto in last place. Hinata was sure that was what was on everyone's mind, anyways.

Sakura laughed. "He once pouted for about a week and a half because he wanted to go skinny dipping in a lake about a year back. It was December and I wasn't about to die of hypothermia." Naruto's antics numbered many and, though she didn't remember a lot of them, she had her parents and her family to thank for their stories and reminders of her childhood. "Oh, Uno," she said before she forgot. Naruto only reddened more when she said it.

"I remember things you held against me," he shot at Sakura. "There was this one time she wanted to sneak out just to get a cheeseburger and she got all red in the face when I didn't go with her."

"That's very mild compared to your escapades," Itachi commented.

"I don't remember that," Sakura said blankly.

"It was before the accident," Naruto shrugged. "I think it was because mom was on some health kick that involved a lot of kale and you were dying for something that didn't taste, as you put it, like newspaper but green. It was like midnight though and we had to be up at six because we were driving down to Uncle's house and I was really tired."

"Ah," Sakura only said. She didn't know whether it was true or not, but she hadn't known Naruto to lie about her memories. She laid her last card down, Hinata kind enough to keep the same color going. "Mom's still on those weird health kicks from time to time."

"What was it this time?" Sasuke asked, a smirk playing across his lips. He had always liked to hear what kind of disgusting diet their mother was trying this time.

"Nothing but beans," Sakura looked slightly traumatized. "Beans everywhere."

"They were in salads, she made a bean burger, they were in our spaghetti with gluten free noodles, she mashed them up into sandwiches, they were even hidden in lasagna!" Naruto said, ticking his fingers as he listed them off. "It was all black beans too. I mean, I don't know how many kinds of beans there are out there, but I think there are a lot more than just black beans."

"Why gluten free noodles?" Sasuke asked.

"She thinks gluten free is better," Hinata had piped up. She had heard the answer enough times to say it without really thinking. She flushed and looked down at her two remaining cards.

"Uno," Itachi finally said. "Many people believe that gluten free is better, though it usually has no extra nutritional value except for those with celiac disease."

"I swear you're speaking english," Naruto said, mouth agape. He looked around. "Wait, Sasuke and Sakura don't have any cards?! Come on!" He still had three left, Hinata was down to two and Itachi just laid down his last card.

"You haven't been paying attention," Sakura laughed. Itachi, without cards in his hands now, wrapped an arm around her shoulders and pulled her into his side. He closed his eyes, tired. She looked up at him, but didn't say anything. She only rested her cheek on his chest as he relaxed into the corner of the sofa. She caught a flicker of worry in Sasuke's eyes, but it was gone as quickly as it'd come. He shrugged his shoulders when he caught her carefully looking at him.

"Well, screw it," Naruto put his cards down. "Should we play monopoly now?"

"Sure," Hinata smiled.

Neji and Tenten even got up from their riveting game of chess to join them around the table. They liked the idea of monopoly more than playing a child's game of cards.

"Sakura, Itachi, are you going to play?" Sasuke asked. He didn't think Naruto would have the mental capacity to ask himself.

"No, I think he's napping," Sakura responded. She felt Itachi's fingers tighten imperceptibly on her waist. She had seen the bags under his eyes and how his quips were not as quick as they usually were, but she hadn't wanted to let him know that she was worrying. The most she could do was let him sleep, let him feel the enjoyment of having her in his arms. He usually didn't like doing this in front of others, being careful only to touch her minimally when they were around others save for Naruto who couldn't care less. He really must be tired to lay back and urge her into cuddling. She had a feeling it was because they were with their friends and had already witnessed such things before when they had all gone camping. Those memories felt like they'd happened ages ago.

It seemed Naruto was even trying to be quieter as they started the game. Itachi was completely asleep at that point and Sakura was well on her way. Itachi had this overwhelming warmth that had such an effect that she could barely keep her eyes open. She heard his steady heartbeat, felt his light breath on the top of her head. She felt warm with his arms locked around her. She felt her eyes drooping rather quickly, though she was trying to focus on her friends playing the game. When she could no longer keep her eyes open she was asleep in a second.

It didn't feel like long to her when she was being shaken gently by Hinata. She yawned as she opened her eyes to look blearily up at the other girl.

"Your mom's calling us for dinner," she said softly. "Everyone else has gone up."

"Thanks," Sakura sat upright, Itachi's eyes already open. He never stayed asleep for long the moment she pulled away from him.

"I thought you'd rather me than Naruto," Hinata gave her a tentative smile. It wasn't that she was afraid of Sakura, it was more that she just didn't know what to say and constantly worried that she would say the wrong thing. She had known Sakura just as long as she'd known Naruto. She had watched her fall from grace. She had watched her gain her strength and lose it all to the accident. She had watched her rise from the ashes and do the best she could. She just didn't know what to say to connect. She knew she could never possibly understand and so stood on the back burner, a kind but quiet friend if she were to ever need it.

"You're right," Sakura laughed. She accepted Hinata's offered hand to get off the couch. Itachi rose silently behind her. He yawned himself and gave his eyes a quick rub, removing the stickiness. He was a little hazy, Sakura could see it in his eyes. He hadn't been ready to wake up.

"Lead the way," she said to Hinata. The dark haired girl bobbed her head and led the way from the basement, feeling like she was a mother hen with her chicks behind her. They all took their seats at the giant table that extended into the living room. They were at the 'kid's table,' though it wasn't separated from the adults at the other end. Everyone was already serving themselves and most of the chatter came from the adults.

"Well, merry christmas, guys," Sakura said with a smile as she reached for the mashed potatoes that were passed to her by Sasuke. She was met with a chorus of 'Merry Christmas!' back to her, though Itachi just gave her knee a gentle squeeze.

Dinner was boring, but it always was when the family was here. They were all too aware that their parents were close enough to listen in and therefore didn't want to say anything they would lock away for later. They tended to just eat quietly while the adults caught up and laughed amongst themselves. They were drunk, it was obvious, and loud laughter was overwhelming in the room. Sakura felt these parties were way too stiff. She didn't like that they felt like they had to be in the basement to avoid being watched by the adults. She didn't like the questions from the adults she hadn't seen in a year or so. She didn't like that they all gave her concerned looks and whispered to each other that she seemed to be doing okay, but don't mention anything that might make her upset. She hated that everyone just walked on eggshells around her.

She was so caught up in her thoughts that she didn't notice she was making a sour face until Itachi leaned in close to her.

"Are you alright?" he asked. "You look about to murder your peas." He was trying to be humorous, bring a smile to her face, but she was too upset now. It was all her fault, she knew, from the thoughts that plagued her unbidden. She shook her head and simply got up from the table. None of the adults noticed, but then, if they did, they'd never say it or bring attention to her. She just went up the stairs, leaving her friends to watch after her.

Naruto looked at Itachi, a silent conversation between them. Itachi blinked and rose silently. He wanted to be the one to go after her, though he knew Naruto would have words with her later. He found her, as he thought he would, in her room. Her face was buried into a lace pillow and she was already tangled in a few throw blankets that seemed to perpetually plague her room.

"My love," he said gently, knowing she adored it when he called her this. "Would you like to talk about it?" He slowly lowered himself on the edge of her bed, laying a gentle hand between her shoulder blades. She reacted slowly, pulling herself up and falling against his shoulder. He let her bury his face into his shoulder. She didn't hug him back and he knew it was because there was something going on her head that she couldn't control.

"They act like I'm a broken piece of porcelain that has to be carefully stepped around and handled with kid gloves," she spat venomously. "All they do is look at me with worry and concern when they don't have the right to worry about me. They say careful words and dance around what they think will hurt me. I hate it."

"They are adults and you are a child," Itachi said softly, quietly. "Adults don't understand the raw emotions that run through a young person's system. Perhaps they have forgotten that they were once like that. They simply don't know what to say or how to say it. They don't want to upset you."

"Sure, but it all ends up in silence and awkward looks," she sounded defeated. "I hate adults like that. They don't understand what happened to me and that I don't want to dwell on it. I just want to get over it and be a normal person, but when they act like this it's completely impossible to do something like that."

"That's why I keep saying I wish for you to meet my mother," Itachi said quietly. He had been spending more time with her since they'd been planning to run away. Now they spent what little time they had before his father got home sipping tea and speaking about the day. He had learned much about his mother and a certain light was beginning to rekindle the fire in her eyes. Her impatience grew as the days wore on and she could barely stand the wait until they were out of that stuffy house. "You may not think much of her, but she will, at least, not dance around you as if a fine doll that could break with a mere touch."

"I know I just..." she sighed, deeply. "Not in that house where your father abused you."

"Alright," he agreed softly. "Would you like your present now? It may distract you." Sakura flushed. She had already given him a present, a book that she particularly liked. He had refused anything deemed too expensive because she had already given him such a sum of money just to help him leave sooner.

"Sure," she ducked her head and he could barely hear her agreement. He pulled a small wrapped box from his pocket and offered it to her. He watched her slim fingers pick apart the paper and open the box to a necklace. It had cost him less than a hundred dollars, knowing Sakura would probably smack him if he got her something too expensive. Off the fine silver chain hung a charm, a silver circle with a single emerald set in it. Her face flushed in pleased happiness and she instantly wanted to take it out and put it on. She turned to Itachi so he could help her clasp it which he did with ease.

"I take you like it," he said, the affection in his voice not lost on her.

"Of course," she smiled and leaned in to kiss him, her arms around his neck before he could even realize it. Her full weight was against him and he was caught off guard, falling back onto her bed. A hand gripped her waist while the other was in her hair, holding her mouth against his. A light flush, just at the very tops of his cheekbones, was barely visible when she finally pulled away from him.

"Is this why you're so tired though?" she asked, worried. She had noticed how the bags under his eyes had become more pronounced, how his eyes were constantly exhausted. Itachi waved a hand and showed little concern.

"I worked a couple extra shifts to pay for it, yes, but that's not the cause of my exhaustion. It's merely working as hard as I do. It will be easier when we are on our own and my mother can work herself. She cannot let my father know that we are readying to leave and therefore cannot even look for a job until she is out of the house as well. She doesn't hold much hope to get a good job, but she will take any job as long as I do not have to work myself half to death." He gave her a soft smile, his tired eyes sparkling. "She wishes for me to go to college. I have yet to let her know that, with all the scholarships I applied to last year, it will only cost me five hundred dollars out of pocket per semester to go."

"Really?" Sakura hadn't actually known this either. She and Itachi hadn't talked about the future. She didn't like to and Itachi hadn't brought it up knowing as such. He was hoping he could break that habit of hers, shutting down when the future was mentioned, but he was sure it was because some last vestiges of suicidal thoughts remained in the recesses of her mind. Sometimes he caught himself thinking that he didn't want to be here, that he should be dead, and he could understand her hesitance of making plans years into the future.

"Yes," he managed to pull himself from his thoughts before it became too obvious. "I am a very intelligent individual, Sakura, I thought you knew that."

"Well, yeah, I did, but—" she cut herself off when she realized he was teasing her and her face broke into a smile soon thereafter. Sometimes it caught her by surprise still and Itachi made her laugh as easily as air came into her lungs.

"So, do you feel better now?" he asked, hoping her negative thoughts had left her alone for now. He knew they were still there, under a layer of stubborn ignorance, but he hoped he had distracted her enough to let them sink beneath the waves of that ignorance for now.

"Yes," she said, eyes luminous, as she answered without any hesitation. She seemed to hesitate when it was obvious they would have to go back downstairs, though. She could ignore those intrusive thoughts, made easier when Itachi was beside her, but she was afraid they would come rushing back the moment she stepped back into that room, noticed the worried glances the adults seemed to always shoot her way. She chewed her bottom lip.

"Hey, it's alright," Itachi murmured as he drew his slender fingertips across her cheek, freeing her lip from her teeth and turning her head back towards him. Surprise shut her mouth as she looked at him. She knew Itachi to be well spoken, his words almost sounding like poetry whenever he spoke, and she had never heard these words fall from his lips. He almost sounded like Sasuke.

"You don't sound like yourself," she managed a small giggle. Just like that, he had distracted her from those horrible thoughts again. Itachi gave her a quizzical stare for half a moment. Then, he seemed to think for another second. It was only the span of a few seconds before he spoke again.

"My dear Sakura," he said, obviously trying to sound like a prince out of a storybook. "You must not think of such intrusive thoughts, for you are as beautiful as the sky above, as breathtaking as the dawn as the sun rises after a storm. You need not worry, for I shall protect you so I may look upon your brilliance every moment I am allowed until the end of time. I—"

She put a hand over his mouth, her eyes dark with mirth. She began giggling, unable to hold it in any longer and she fell to the side, laughing until her sides hurt and it began to be hard to breathe. Her eyes were streaming as she looked over at Itachi, shaking her head as she just began giggling again. This was a little too much for her. Itachi wasn't known to be outright funny, but she couldn't help but break down at his quiet dry humor. He was being extravagant to make her laugh, though she knew all these things were undoubtedly true. If he hadn't been trying to make her laugh, she'd think it very sweet.

Itachi could only stare down at her, affection shining in his eyes and the edges of his mouth twitching up in the slightest smile. It was the most of a smile anyone could ever get out of him and Sakura seemed to make it appear as naturally as bees came to flowers. He reached to stroke her face and brush her wild pink hair out of her eyes. He was glad he could make her so happy like this. He was glad it was so easy to make her smile, a mere bit of melodrama able to do the job. He just loved her and everything about her and that was more than enough.

She was blushing as she stared up at him, the love for her in his eyes plain as day. She finally sat up and looked at the door. It had seemed so foreboding before, but with Itachi beside her it was just a plain old door, wooden and painted white. Itachi still offered his hand to her. She took it, feeling safe and secure as he laid a gentle hand on the small of her back and led her down the hallway. The adults had looked up as they'd come down the stairs, but they quickly glanced away. Itachi could see what she meant, but he did not falter. His hand was steady and warm on the small of her back as they made their way to the basement.

"Hey, Sak, you okay?" Naruto asked. Everyone was sitting around the little table again having resumed their game of monopoly. Sakura just nodded numbly, taking her seat on the sofa. They had left it empty for them. Itachi took his place next to her, his arm wrapped around her. No one gave them odd looks and they didn't ask her about what had happened either. Their conversation hadn't been interrupted and Sakura tuned into what Naruto was talking about.

"Hinata, you should trade me St. James' Place."

"I don't want Park Place though," she shot back. "I don't even have Boardwalk and no one lands on them anyways."

"Then what about Marvin Gardens? You have a yellow and the last one hasn't been bought yet." Sakura felt Itachi tense and knew he had to be surprised. He didn't know Naruto to be strategic and it brought a smile to her face. Naruto could be good at it when he wanted to be, he really just had to think about it.

"Well," Hinata clicked her tongue. "Let's wait and see if I can get it. I'm not giving you a monopoly if I don't get one in return." Neji had the slightest of smiles, even more slight than the one Itachi always gave her, on his face. Though it was just a game, he was proud of Hinata. Tenten had noticed as well, looking away quickly so she wouldn't give it away. Sasuke just didn't care and Naruto was too much of an idiot to notice these little things that others did.

Sakura had fallen into a haze after a while. It was boring watching the others finish their game. Itachi was stroking her hair anyways and it was causing her to relax, her head in his lap. Her eyes were slowly closing again, just enjoying the feeling of his fingers in her hair. He was leaning back on the couch, eyes closed himself. He was still so tired. He just wanted to sleep and he knew the others wouldn't stop him nor wake him unless they had to.

"Jesus, those two," Sasuke looked over at the sleeping couple.

"Aw, little Sasuke is jealous!" Naruto grinned cheekily and poked his cheek. At this point, Sakura was pretending to sleep, not wanting to let them know she was listening in.

"I am not," he growling, swiping at Naruto's hand. "I meant those two could fall asleep anywhere, no matter what they're doing or what's going on. You just have to give them something mildly horizontal." He had caught them sleeping together everywhere. He had caught them in a hallway, next to some stairs at school. There was one time he'd come home with Naruto and they were leaning back against a couch in front of the gas fire upstairs, soundly asleep. Naruto had dragged them to bowling one night and on the way home they were asleep, Itachi leaning against the window. He didn't know how two people could be so tired.

"Sakura says that Itachi's been really tired lately," Naruto said with a shrug. "I'm not surprised that he falls asleep everywhere. I think he makes Sakura sleepy, personally, but she always had a lot of trouble sleeping." If anything it made him happy that they took little naps everywhere and at every chance they could. It made him feel like Sakura was getting enough rest for once.

"Why is he so tired?" Sasuke asked, mostly to himself under his breath. Naruto couldn't tell him either. It wasn't because he knew and was sworn to secrecy, it was because it wasn't his business and he hadn't asked. They could handle themselves. He knew Sasuke was actually worried now. Earlier, he had noticed the same fleeting look of worry in his eyes when Itachi had fallen asleep the first time. Now, he didn't even try to hide it. He looked to his brother and his girlfriend, seemingly thinking very, very hard.

It was nearing midnight when they all finally said goodnight to each other. Neji and Hinata had long gone home, not wanting to be shouted at if they walked in late. Tenten had been next to leave, yawning into her hand. She was just tired, she said. Sasuke and Itachi had stayed the longest, but it was long past due to go home. Sasuke was waiting for Itachi at the door as his older brother was busy tucking Sakura into bed. Naruto was with him, but tiredness kept the idiot quiet. He was just yawning and rubbing his eyes, looking blearily at the stairs and hoping Itachi would come down in a second so he could go to bed.

"I apologize," Itachi said as he came down the stairs. "Sakura has quite the grip when she wants me to stay," he was straightening his shirt which was a little wrinkled where she no doubt had grabbed him. Naruto just shrugged.

"She's like that." He yawned again. "I gotta go to bed before I fall asleep against the wall," he rubbed his eyes again.

"Alright, we'll get out of your hair," Itachi said, heading for the door. Naruto mumbled something of a goodnight as he closed the door behind them, locking it.

"Itachi, before we go, can we talk?" Sasuke asked, not wanting to leave the last step before Itachi agreed. Itachi looked back to him in surprise. He took a seat next to him and waited patiently, his elbows on his knees. Sasuke was glad his brother was the patient sort and didn't seem affected by the cold or the want to get home so he could pass out the moment his head hit the pillow.

"What are you upset about, Sasuke?" Itachi asked. He didn't look at him. He had learned Sasuke didn't like to be stared at when he had something to say. It made him feel anxious and it made it harder to speak.

"Are you okay?" he asked, staring at his hands. "You've been very tired lately and I'm worried about you." He didn't like that his brother was working himself to the bone. He hardly had time lately. He went to school in the morning and turned right around to go to work. He worked long days on the weekend just to make sure he was on the full time payroll. He hadn't thought much about it, but it must be so exhausting. School was like a job in itself.

"I am perfectly alright," Itachi assured him. "Once we are moved and you and mother begin working, it will be quite a lot easier to rest. I am only working so much so we might be able to afford furniture and safely afford food for a month or two so it does not worry mother so much that she must earn a lot of money for a while. She will have a lot of adjusting, more so than you or myself, to go through when this happens."

"You're right I...I never thought of that," he looked at the ground. The second Itachi had come to him with this plan, he'd offered to find a job too. Itachi hadn't been able to find his records, though, and without them he couldn't be accepted for a job. He'd been giving Itachi twenty, thirty dollars here and there when he'd managed to earn it shoveling driveways or doing other small things for neighbors.

"It's alright," Itachi laid his hand on Sasuke's shoulder. He was astounded at how gentle his older brother was. He was amazingly good at calming him, his mother, everyone around him. He was mostly surprised because he didn't know how someone who had been beaten and hurt for so long could still show such patience and gentleness. "Soon we will be away and it will be possible to help me. Mother is completely set on it."

"She hasn't been looking?"

"She cannot," Itachi repeated the same thing he'd told Sakura about his mother looking for work. Sasuke nodded in understanding.

"I get it. We don't want to throw father into suspicion."

"No," Itachi agreed. "I'm sure it will not stop us from leaving, but it would create an issue. I have been able to take father toe to toe since I was perhaps fourteen, fifteen years old. However, I did not wish for his rage to turn to you or mother, both of you are much smaller than I, and so I took the beatings in silence though I was strong enough to stop them. I do not wish to defend all of us from him while we are leaving. Mother is right. He will try to pin us with burglary because he will be angry that we left, especially mother. If I were to defend us, even if he were the first one to throw the punch, I am sure he will try to have me arrested for battery. That bodes poorly for how yourself and mother would fare without me. For now, I need to toe the line so I may provide for the both of you so we may leave this situation behind. We cannot give him anything with which he can use to draw us back. I am sure mother would not be able to bear it if she were pulled back to him after finally leaving him."

"Mother always thought she should do something," Sasuke murmured. "She was so tortured, all the time. I remember that she would read us to sleep at night, then she would only read me to sleep. Then, she stopped altogether one day and I never knew why." He squeezed his eyes and shook his head violently, as if trying to shake off thoughts he didn't want to think. Itachi wrapped his arm around his shoulder now and squeezed. Sasuke tensed at the contact. He had not been touched in a long time, Naruto notwithstanding, and a hug was coming completely out of left field. He did not push his brother away, however, merely let him give him the half hug.

"Don't think of troubling things if they upset you, Sasuke," he said quietly. "Only look towards the future. I am hoping mother will be able to deal with her own head, on her own time. I am hoping we can leave that horrible man behind and I am hoping that mother will begin to smile and laugh again. I wish to hear her laugh again." He was looking up at the stars.

"I don't remember mother laughing," Sasuke said quietly. "It must have sounded beautiful if you want to hear it again."

"Our mother is just a beautiful woman," Itachi smiled warmly. Not the slight smile he always gave Sakura, a smile he knew she would see easily because it was Sakura. He smiled for real, for Sasuke's sake, because he wasn't sure whether he would catch it or not. "Her heart was tainted by someone who did not deserve her love and only holds her hatred now." He sighed, tension leaving his body with the single breath. "Let us get home. I know father has little capacity to worry, but mother will not sleep soundly until we are in our beds." She had told him that herself. She stayed up, waiting for Itachi to come home every night just so she knew that he was safe. She would dream the most fitful nightmares if she fell asleep before she heard his quiet tread down the corridor.

"You're right," Sasuke finally pulled himself up from the step and followed him to the car. Itachi was silent as they drove home. The house was silent, but their mother was sitting in her favorite armchair in the living room. She smiled at them silently, quickly, and pointed to the sofa on the other side of the room. Their father was asleep on it, obviously drunk out of his mind. Sasuke put a hand on Itachi's arm, letting him know that he and mother could handle it and Itachi need not get involved. Their mother pressed a single finger to her lips, looking straight at her eldest son. He nodded and quietly, as quietly as he could, snuck past his father to the stairs. It was lucky he did this often, for he knew exactly where the stairs and floorboards creak. His mother and his brother waited for the soft click of his bedroom door before they went to wake their father so the two could help him up to bed. If he were to wake on the sofa in the morning, he would know something was going on between his family. They always brought him up to bed when he was passed out drunk somewhere in the house.

Itachi laid away for a long while, staring at the ceiling. He was turning his mind over and over, for it was buzzing and he was unable to sleep. He kept seeing Sakura's smile in his mind's eye when he closed his eyes and all he wanted to do was speak to her. He had barely seen her since he had decided to finance his family splitting. His time with her had decreased a great deal. She had only smiled and bore with it.

It worried him, to no end. What with had happened earlier at dinner, he was even more worried. He was a worrier when it came to those close to him, a new fact about himself he hadn't quite known until he and Sakura had become entangled with each other. He couldn't help but worry about Sasuke and whether he was still in good favor with his father. He worried about his mother and how she would fare the moment they were out of the house and on their own. He worried about Sakura and whether their diminished time was doing damage to her mental state. He knew of the unbidden thoughts that came to her and what destruction they could belie. It was destruction he knew well himself. They were intrusive. They were thoughts that were always there, underneath the wave of ignorance and distraction, and they rose up whenever they damn well felt like it. He would be having a perfectly good day and suddenly he would think that he was not good enough, that he had managed to make it this far, but he would be dead before he could graduate. It was enough to drive him mad. If these were the thoughts that came without permission to him, then what kind of thoughts came to Sakura without her say-so?

She wouldn't tell him. If they were mild, like today, then she would divulge the information so he could help her. If they were suicidal, like his own, he always knew because her lips would refuse to move. She would only duck her head and bite her lip, refuse to cry. He assumed it was because she felt as though she should not say them. It was as if, if she said them and gave them a voice, a reality, then the thoughts would be true. It was as if she had been berated for sharing them before and therefore would not, could not, say them again, even to him.

It worried him and all he wanted to do was see her smile. She had helped him, though his own problem was basking in a helplessness he'd brought onto himself. He had seen how strong she was, even in the face of her intrusive thoughts, that he thought he could have the same strength himself. It just seemed that he had more success pushing them away and telling the demon in the back of his head that it was wrong. He believed it was wrong, no matter with how much conviction it spoke. He just had to convince Sakura of that as well, he just didn't know how.

He turned his phone on just so he could see the smiling Sakura he'd taken a photo of. She had been with him to see the great tree in the square be lit up for the season. It had been snowing that night and her eyes were brighter than the stars in the sky. She wore a light pink hat with a pom pom on top and a matching, overlarge scarf. He had managed to get her to take a picture and it was his favorite. She was staring at the camera with those luminous eyes, a satisfied, wide smile on her face. He loved this picture because of her eyes.

There was something about her eyes, his as well. When someone looked into them for long enough they knew there wasn't something quite right with them. It was something that was missing, not something that was there. It was a piece of themselves they weren't so sure they could find, but then again they didn't know what that piece consisted of. He had noticed that Sasuke didn't seem as worried when he looked into his eyes now. He was sure he was, slowly but surely, finding that piece that he didn't know where to find. He was sure Sakura was as well, but she was a bit more slow going than himself. He had his memories to fall back on. He knew where his problems originated, and he had an astounding amount of self awareness. Sakura had nothing but a hazy swamp, unable to grasp even one memory so she could tell herself when these things started and how to fix them. He thought her missing memories tortured her more than anything else. If he could give them to her, he would, but there was no possible way to find those things. It was all just smoke and mirrors. She would have to accept that she would never know. He didn't know how to help her come to peace with that.

He turned on his side, worry gnawing at the inside of his stomach. His phone lit up with a text, Sakura knowing better than to try and call him when he was home and he was worried his father would wake.

Good night Tachi. Love you. It said.

He smiled and cradled his phone against his chest. Even if he worried endlessly about her, he knew she loved him and cared for him. If that was enough to tether her to this world for now, then so be it. He was sure that, one day, he would help her find peace just as she had been helping him to do so. He promised himself that.