Chapter 8

'Take your foot off the gas, Glenn! SLOW DOWN! '

I grasp the seat with both hands, as my driving buddy swerves along the road at great speed. My stomach is doing somersaults and I feel nauseous! Whose idea was it for me to ride with him? I close my eyes and try to control the dizziness.

'Jen, its fine! Don't fret, I was made for driving like this!'

I roll my eyes inside my eyelids and pray that we are nearing our destination soon, as I really don't think that I can hold on to the contents of my stomach much longer, and there isn't much there in the first place. We have been on the road for weeks, searching deserted towns for life and supplies, and silently trying to find a space to feel safe. We are constantly on the move, never able to let our guard down in case we are ambushed by walkers, or another group who mean us harm. It has been so long since I just paused, just for a little while. Even sleep is short and brief, as we rotate shifts to keep guard, meaning we are always in and out of sleep.

As a group stumbled across some people a few days ago, a nice couple who we swapped a few supplies with, and they had mentioned seeing a camp, with people who had appeared to have settled a few hours away. A discussion had gone down in our group after this, about what we should do about this information, and this had resulted in an argument. Andrea felt that we should head off in another direction, not wanting to possibly get ourselves into a difficult situation. Rick felt that we owed it to everyone in our group to try and join forces with these other people, knowing that may have other resources or supplies available, and the group split between who agreed with who. I had felt like a neutral player in this debate, not sure either suggestion was correct, and my head throbbed as people shouted across one another, nobody able to make a decision.

'Maybe some of us should drive off ahead and check it out, whilst the others remain here?'

The words left my mouth, and I wasn't entirely sure whether I agreed with what I was saying, but it felt like a plausible suggestion. I watched, almost timidly as the gang turned to face me. Andrea looked almost full of disgust at having to face me, but she nodded her head slowly.

'Julie is right.'

'It's Jenni, actually,' I said, knowing how pathetic I sounded. And just to prove this, Andrea rolled her eyes and tutted.

'Yeah, whatever. But seriously, she has a point.'

Andrea looked around the group, who remained silent. Some appeared to be thinking over the plan, others appeared to be waiting for the punchline.

'We have someone drive on by… check it out… and then come back here. If those who go don't come back within a certain amount of time, then we know that they aren't coming back and we head the other way. We don't wait! We don't cry over them! We move on!'

Andrea looked at me as she said this, her contempt for me evident and I realised that I may have just inadvertently put myself forward for the mission.

Rick looked at Andrea, nodded his head and started talking about the plan. A plan that involved us finding a car; there were a few lying around near where we were, and we managed to get it working with the help of Glenn. I think back to how awkwardly I had stood around and watched as he syphoned petrol from other cars, wanting to broach the subject of us two being friends, but not entirely sure how to start. He had sensed me loitering.

'Jen, you are kind of giving me the creeps…just hanging around me like that.'

I looked at him sharply, expecting to see a serious face, but instead I saw an open smile; friendly and familiar. I laughed, breaking the tension between us.

'I just needed some time to heal my male ego…we're good, okay?'

I nodded, smiling bashfully. I had missed talking to him, he had quickly become my closest friend.

'Yeah, okay,' I responded almost tearfully, and he punched me playfully in the shoulder.

'Come on, help me out…. I don't really know that much about cars. It just made me look useful, when I put myself forward.'

I laugh again, a deep, raucous laugh and before long Glenn is laughing too.

Luckily for him, the car we gassed up was driveable. Glenn and I decided to go ahead and see if we could find traces of the group we were looking for. The plan was simple; go on ahead, check out the group and see if they would be willing to include more members…always from a distance. We were only to check out and report what we saw. Nothing else. Our food supply was running low, we were low on muscle and we needed more numbers to help us to survive.

And so, yesterday myself and Glenn had headed off to search for the group that had been spotted. We drove for a few hours, all the time searching the roads for clues. Two hours passed, and then we saw them. A group of maybe 20 people, camped out on a dirt road. A Winnebago was parked up and a camp had been set up. I had looked over at Glenn and I was surprised to see that he was beaming. Glenn had the biggest smile on his face, and to prove how happy he was, he hit the steering wheel with his fist and jumped around ecstatically.

'Glenn, they may not let us join them,' I say, not really wanting to burst his bubble but I felt I had to dial down his excitement with a bit of reality.

'You don't understand; I know that van! It belongs to a guy who I met just after this all broke out! That is Dale's van! We will be safe here…'

I looked at the group, they appeared to be normal and there were certainly no signs of cannibalism (I had wondered how people may change living in a world like this) but this group looked safe. I wanted to trust Glenn's judgement, but I knew it wasn't safe to completely trust what you saw.

'So, do you think we should go back and tell Rick and the rest?,' I asked.

'Yeah, I think we can. I think we will be okay here…I really do.'

And so, we had gone back and told Rick and the rest of them. We all placed a lot of trust on Glenn and we discussed what to do if things didn't work out the way we hoped, but we decided that it was the only solution open to us.

That is why we are here, driving what feels like 100 miles per hour down a country road, towards a group of people that may or may not invite us in. My heart is racing, and not just because Glenn is driving like a race car driver. Whilst we had been out here the first day, Rick and the group had found a white van to transport them and they were following behind us.

'Nearly there…I can see the Winnebago up ahead!'

Glenn shouted this; his excitement clear to see.

'Are you sure this is going to work out okay, Glenn?'

I fear what might happen if they decide to turn on us.

'Of course, I am, Dale is a good guy…. he will see us right.'

'And what if Dale isn't there?'

I voiced what I was thinking out loud and I look over at him, worried that I had disrupted his good mood.

'I guess we will find out when we get there,' he says, eyes remaining fixed on the road, but finally releasing his foot off the gas, allowing us to slow down.

Turning my head forwards, I decide to remain quiet until we know what is happening for certain, and I watch with both dread and curiosity as I spot the camping vehicle up ahead. I steel my eyes away briefly to look sideways at Glenn, he is now looking worried but not enough to back out. In the side mirror, I see the white van in the distance, keeping back in case things don't work out.

'There he is!'

Excitement is coming back into his voice, as Glenn points out a man standing by the vehicle; he is wearing a sunhat, which helps shade his grey bearded face. He looks like someone who has just come back from holiday, as he wears a floral holiday shirt and shorts, but he also shoulders a rifle. And as he stares out towards us getting closer, he takes the rifle and aims it at us, looking down the scope. A moment freezes and I squeeze my eyes tight, expecting to hear the booming sound of gunfire…but when none come, I open my eyes slowly just as Glenn is pulling up just in front of his friend, Dale.

'Glenn!' his expression is one of happiness as he recognises the driver of this vehicle. His eyes scan my side briefly, probably wondering whether I am someone who can be trusted.

Glenn climbs out of the car and steps forward to man-hug Dale. They speak animatedly for a few moments as I sit transfixed in the car. People are moving forward towards us, every single one of them a stranger to me. They are wondering as I do; is she a friend or foe? Can she be trusted? And possibly, what can she bring to this group?

I note from the side mirror that the rest of the group have parked and have now started disembarking the van. I slowly remove myself from our vehicle also, and for the first time since I met her, I feel relieved to see the unfriendly face of Andrea. She looks at me briefly before her eyes focus on something behind me. The facial expression change to her takes me by surprise. During these past couple of weeks, I have never seen her smile, and now here she is with the biggest one on her face. She runs past me, and I turn as I see her run into the arms of a lady who has a familiar look to her. They embrace tightly, each one crying into the other one's hair. Its difficult not to feel emotional over this display and my heart aches as I remember how much I am missing my own family. The faces in front of us appear to be welcoming and I watch as a mother talks to her son. There are tears streaming down his face, and I get lost in the display.

'Rick?,' a male voice I don't recognise calls out our group members name.

And then they turn, mother and son, looking behind me, both appearing to look shocked. I turn and see Rick mirroring their expressions…and then instantly, I realise that this is his family. This is who he has been looking for. Tears fall down my cheeks way before they run to one another. Rick has searched for so long for these two, he has hunted day and night, never giving up…and here they are, embracing one another, relief flooding through them as they acknowledge that each other is safe. I don't even try to compose myself and I let the tears streak down my face. I feel an arm go around my shoulder and I rest my head against Glenn, knowing that this moment is being felt by all of us. We have all witnessed this man's journey as he searched for the people he loved. All is right now. We connect to this group, some in more ways than we could have ever imagined. Seeing these people reconnect gives me hope. Maybe one day, I will find them. Maybe one day, I will be hugging my own family.