is there anything you wouldn't do (the bond between parent and child)
By: AndiKaneUnderwood
AU: Alpha/Beta/Omega, Canon Divergence
Dean Winchester: Alpha
Sam Winchester: Omega
Castiel: Omega
Jack Klien: Omega
"No man or woman of the humblest sort can be strong, gentle and good, without the world being better for it, without somebody being helped and comforted by the very existence of that goodness."
~Phillips Brooks
"Parents don't reveal how often they have bitten their tongue, fought back the tears, or been too tired to take off their clothes after a day of childcare. The parent loves, but they do not expect the favor to be returned in any significant way."
~Alain de Botton
"The bond between a parent and child is the primary bond, the foundation for the rest of the child's life. The presence or absence of this bond determines much about the child's resiliency and what kind of adult they will grow up to be."
~Jane Fonda
Sam Winchester was many things.
He was the brother of Dean, the child of Mary and John, friend and family to Castiel. He was the Boy King of Hell, the perfect vessel of the Archangel Lucifer, the man who started the Apocolypse. He was the man who almost became a lawyer until his brother came back and pulled him back to the life he'd tried so hard to avoid. He was the man who got Jess killed, who'd betrayed his family many times, who sacrificed himself time and time again for people who didn't care or turned on them later. He was the man who had suffered for a hundred and fifty years at the hands of two perfect torturers.
Sam Winchester was many things, but he was not a parent. Sam had never wanted to be a father, not after what happened with his father. His father hadn't been the best of parents. He never expected to have a child, much less to fall in love with one. He'd never thought he could fall in love with the son of Lucifer, but Jack had wormed his way in and Sam had become a parent.
He didn't want to hurt Jack, but Dean had told him it was the only way. Sam wasn't so sure. No matter what Dean said, Sam couldn't think of Jack as anything less than the boy he taught to float a pencil. Jack was his baby, his little boy. Jack didn't deserve to be locked up. Sam had loved Jack since he'd gotten to know the kid. When Jack had nightmares, he'd come to Sam's room and sleep. When Jack was scared, Sam was who he would come to. When Jack had questions, Sam was the one he'd ask them to. Jack was Sam's baby.
No one on Earth was going to hurt him. Not even his brother.
Supernatural~Supernatural~Supernatural
Sam's True Mate, the Archangel Gabriel, had died protecting his family from the Other Michel, so Dean had been Sam's acting Alpha since he'd been back. Sam would normally listen to Dean on most things, but not this time.
"You're his go-to," Dean was saying.
Sam cut him off angrily, "I'm his father, of course, I'm his go-to."
Dean continued as if he hadn't heard, "If I do this, I could lose it." Dean paused, "If I do this, I will lose it."
Sam sighed, closed his eyes as he was thinking. A thought entered his head, one that would help him keep Jack safe. He looked back up at Dean and nodded. He knew what he had to do. He went along with the plan for now, but once Jack was there Sam would do whatever it took to keep Jack safe. He prayed for Jack- for his son to come home, and Jack did.
Dean started talking, spouting his lies and playing it up. Jack tried to explain and Sam was angry, but his love for Jack won out. He played along for a bit, but when Dean got Jack into the box and locked it, Sam came in close. He looked at Dean with those pleading eyes and asked, "Give me a minute?"
Dean nodded and left the room. Sam waited until he couldn't hear Dean's footsteps any more and then leaned down near the box. "Can you hear me?"
"Yes," Jack replied. "Sam, how long do I have to stay in here?"
Sam felt his eyes well up with tears and he sniffled, "Don't worry, Jack. It won't be very long. Trust me, honey."
Sam could hear Jack's body move against the metal. "Sam, do you remember when I had that nightmare and I came to your room crying and you told me about that time you had those hallucinations of Lucifer?"
Sam cleared his throat, "I remember."
"Sam, I'm seeing Lucifer. He's telling me all kinds of things that can't be true." Jack's voice sounded kind of panicked and that made Sam think maybe Jack still had a little bit of his soul left. Enough for an idea to work.
Sam cleared his throat again and nodded, laying his head again the metal box. "Don't listen to him, Jack. Don't you dare listen to him, okay? I'll pray to you when I can come to get you out, okay? I'll pray to you and I'll come to get you out."
Jack sighed, "Okay. Sam?"
"Yeah, Jack?"
"You promise I can come out?"
"I promise, Jack. You'll come out and we'll fix your soul, then you and I are going on a road trip, okay?"
"Okay. Thank you, Sam."
Sam stood. "I'll pray to you, Jack. Soon," he promised. Then he turned and walked out the door, praying to Cas to let him know what was going on and hoping Cas could hear him and would agree.
Dean met him at the door, "You okay?"
Sam sniffled, wiped the tears from his eyes, then nodded, "Yeah. I will be." Once all of this is over.
Supernatural~Supernatural~Supernatural
It was late at night when Sam slowly crept down the hall and stopped at Dean's door. He stayed there for several moments and listened. When he heard only the sounds of someone sleeping, he nodded to himself and continued down the hall. Jack, I'm coming for you. I'm going to get you out.
Jack didn't respond, because prayers didn't work like that, but Sam hoped Jack understood. Sam slowly unlocked the door and eased it open. The hinges would creak if he opened the door too fast and Sam didn't want to risk waking Dean. If Dean woke up, the plan would be ruined. Dean was the only Alpha around anymore; Gabriel and Balthazar were dead, Jimmy Novak had been released to Heaven a long time ago, Jody and Claire stayed at home the majority of the time, and he didn't like thinking about what had happened to Jo Harvelle. So, Sam refused to be forced into submission by a brother who thought he was doing the right thing.
He slowly came into the room and knocked lightly on the top of the box. "Jack?" he whispered, "I'm here. Are you ready?"
"You came back," Jack replied.
Sam smiled at the sound of his son's voice. "I did," he murmured as he slowly undid the latches on the box.
He pushed open the lid and smiled at Jack as the younger Omega looked up at him, blinking in the darkness as his eyes adjusted. "I almost thought you wouldn't," Jack sighed as he sat up, looking almost relieved.
"I know it was hard, honey. I'm so sorry, but you're out now. I need you to do something for me, Jack. Okay?"
Jack nodded as Sam helped him out of the box then pulled him into a hug. "Anything."
Sam let Jack go and offered him a smile. "Okay, um. I need you to stay very quiet okay? We're going to go on that road trip I promised."
Jack tilted his head and narrowed his eyes in confusion. "I don't understand, we haven't restored my soul yet."
Sam nodded, "I know. I know, and I promise I'll explain it all to you later. Right now, though, I need you to stay very quiet and follow me, okay? Cas is going to meet us outside and we're going to go far away from here." Sam gently took Jack's hand and began leading him to the door.
"What about Dean?" Jack questioned.
Sam paused in the middle of checking the hall. He looked at Jack very seriously, kneeling on the floor and taking Jack's face between his hands, "I'll explain in the car, honey. Just trust me, okay?"
Jack nodded, "Okay, Sam."
They made their way quickly and quietly back to Sam's room where he grabbed the bags he'd packed earlier when Dean was out on a beer run. He slipped some cash into both and then handed one to Jack. "I'm going to take you to your room so you can get anything I missed, okay? But you have to be quick about it, I want to leave as soon as we can."
Jack nodded and Sam led them back to Jack's old room, where Jack grabbed the red, fur-lined jacket Sam made him wear in the cold and the old necklace Cas had bought him on a hunt. He couldn't feel much right now, but he knew that these two objects were very important to him and he'd regret it if he left them behind. As an afterthought, he also grabbed the ratty old stuffed bunny that Sam had gotten him after Jack started having nightmares and the keychain Dean had given him when he came back from the dead.
He looked at Sam, who was standing guard in the doorway and nodded. Sam nodded back and they hurried from the room, quickly heading to the War Room they prepared for hunts in and then up the stairs. Sam stopped him, "Okay, honey, you first."
Jack nodded and Sam quickly opened the door to let the cool night air in. Jack glanced back, hesitating, but at Sam's encouraging nod, he stepped out and stood on the gravel while Sam followed and shut the door with a squeak and a loud bang. Sam panicked, looking at Jack. They both had enhanced hearing from their Omega biology so they heard it when Dean shouted Sam's name. Sam looked at Jack with wide eyes. He set a hand on Jack's shoulder and gave him a gentle shove, "Go! Cas is waiting about a mile up the road."
Jack shook his head, grasping Sam's wrist and refusing to let go. "I won't leave without you."
Sam twisted his wrist and Jack's grip was slipped. "Go. If I'm not there in ten minutes, tell Cas to floor it. Don't come looking for me."
Jack shook his head again. "I'm not leaving without you," he grasped Sam's wrist again and with a rustle of wings, they were gone. They landed in front of Cas's truck.
Castiel looked startled to see them, but he flipped the headlights on and called, "Get in!"
Sam pushed Jack to the backseat and shut the door behind him, looking around to make sure they were alone. He doubted Dean could get out to Cas's truck that fast, but anything was possible when it came to Dean Winchester. Sam hustled to the front passenger seat and got in, sliding his bag off his shoulder and to the floorboard. "Drive," he said.
Castiel pushed on the accelerator and the truck headed down the road. Not one of the Omegas in that truck looked back.
Supernatural~Supernatural~Supernatural
An hour into the trip Sam's stomach reminded him that he was very human and hadn't eaten since they found out about their mother's second death. Castiel looked at Sam, "We should stop and get something to eat. I need to fuel the truck anyway."
Sam nodded, "Alright. Jack, are you hungry?"
Jack looked up startled like he'd forgotten where he was, "Yes."
Sometimes Sam forgot that Jack was half-angel, but it was never more apparent than in the way his eyes flashed when Sam had said his name. "Jack, you okay?"
Jack tilted his head, "I just don't understand. You said we were getting my soul back."
Sam nodded, "I know and we will, but not there."
Jack looked at Sam, "Why couldn't Dean come with us?"
Sam opened his mouth, then closed it and sighed, "Dean's not in a good place right now. He's angry and scared and confused. He's making some bad choices right now and it's only going to hurt all of us, so we're going to go far away until he's better."
Jack nodded slowly, "Why now? Why not earlier?"
Castiel glanced at Sam like he was wondering that himself as he put on his blinker and took the next exit with some fast food places and a gas station. Sam considered his answer, remembering all the times Dean had used an Alpha's Voice on him to ensure his safety. "Do you remember how I taught you about an Omega's biology?" he asked, making eye contact with Jack in the mirror.
Jack and Cas both nodded because Sam had taught them both about Omega biology in the time between hunting monsters and running for their lives. Sam had been there for them both when their Heats hit, had helped them through it the best he could. Sam sighed, "Dean is an Alpha, he knows how to manipulate an Omega to keep them out of danger. Right now, he thinks Jack is the danger and he's trying to keep us away from him. He can't know what happened tonight until we're far away from the Bunker. I'm afraid of what he'd do if he found us right now. I'll contact him when I know it's safe."
Jack looked at Sam curiously, "So, he lied to me? Sam, did you lie to me? I trusted you."
Sam closed his eyes, "I know, Jack, and I'm sorry. I said what I had to to keep you safe until I could get you away from him. I'm so sorry, Jack."
Jack's eyes flickered briefly and Sam was afraid for a moment that he'd run away to where Sam couldn't keep him safe, but then he nodded, "I understand. Thank you for telling me and keeping me safe."
Sam nodded, but he also knew that Jack couldn't feel much right now. He'd be better when they got him his soul back. Until the Marks could properly show up on his arms and he could talk to his Soulmate again, Sam would worry over the younger Omega and hope they found a way to give him back his soul soon. He looked back to the road as Cas pulled into a McDonald's and parked the truck. "I won't be too long. Sam?"
Sam nodded and opened the door, sliding out of the truck and meeting Castiel in the front. "Cas?"
"Do you think this is the wisest choice? You know Dean will move Heaven and Earth to find us and bring us back." Cas fretted.
Sam nodded, "I know. But I can't just sit back and watch him lock Jack in a box when we still have a chance to save him, he doesn't deserve that. No matter what he's done, he's still family." Same glanced at the boy in the truck, who was staring contentedly out his window watching the cars pass in the late-night traffic. "No matter what he's done, he's still my baby."
Cas sighed, nodded, then pulled Sam into a tight hug. "I know, Sam. He's mine too. I understand how hard this is for you. I'm so sorry."
Sam nodded again his shoulder and hugged Cas back. "It isn't easy for you either. Dean's your Soulmate, you're not meant to be apart."
"Angelic Soulmates work differently than human Soulmates. Thankfully, or we would never be able to pull this off." Cas sighed, letting Sam go and scrubbing a hand down his face, "I'll be back in a minute, stay with Jack."
Sam nodded and walked back to the door, climbing into the truck with ease. He turned and looked at Jack, "You wanna talk about it?"
Jack tilted his head, "About what?"
Sam offered him a smile, "I know what it's like to be soulless, Jack. You don't have to hide it from me. If you don't want to talk about it, that's okay, but I'm here if you need anything."
Jack looked down, "It's strange. I know you love me, Sam, and I keep trying to feel it too because I know that I do love you, but I just feel..." he trailed off and Sam knew.
"Empty," Sam finished.
Jack nodded, "Yes," he murmured. "Is that bad? That I can't feel anything?"
Sam nodded before he could stop himself, but when Jack's face fell, he reached out and gently caressed his cheek as a mother would her child. "Yet," he whispered, "You can't feel anything, yet. We're going to get your soul back, honey. You'll be good as new. In the meantime, we'll go and stay with Jody for a while, maybe at that cabin she talks about sometimes. We'll lay low until we figure this out. You'll be okay."
Jack nodded, leaning into Sam's hand on reflex. Sam was happy to see that some things hadn't changed despite Jack's current soullessness. Cas came back with the food and Sam pulled himself back into his seat to take the food Cas offered. He passed it back to Jack and watched the younger tear into the burger like he was starving. Given that he probably hadn't eaten in a few days, he probably was. Just because he didn't have a soul didn't mean he didn't have the basic human needs. He offered his fries to the younger as he watched and Jack took them almost hesitantly, the same way he'd left the Bunker.
Sam offered him a smile and Jack offered one back. He glanced at Cas. "We need to stay beneath the radar, even the angels can't find us."
Cas nodded, "The protection sigils I carved into your ribs all those years ago have been done away with since you have died and come back since then. When you are resurrected, it resets your body to peak health. They were gone by the time Jack saved you a few days ago. I will renew them later if you like."
Sam nodded, "What about Jack?"
"His grace will be harder to conceal, but I will work with him. Perhaps it would be wise to carve the sigils into his ribs as well." Cas replied thoughtfully.
"Do you have to power to do that?" Jack asked suddenly.
Cas glanced back at the boy in the mirror. "I had the full power of an angel the first time I did it. Since then, I have had a few mishaps, but I'm sure I can handle it."
Jack tilted his head, "Cas, you don't have to say things that you think will spare my feelings."
Cas didn't say anything for a moment, then he sighed, "I am unsure. I was a full-blooded Angel of the Lord when I first carved those sigils into their ribs. My father hasn't restored me to my full glory and the Fall took more out of me than I care to admit."
Jack nodded, "If we need these sigils to stay below the radar, then show me how to do it. I'm at full power and I can handle it."
Cas hesitated, but a nod from Sam both reassured and comforted him. "Alright. I'll show you when we stop for the night."
Jack nodded, then yawned. Sam glanced at him, "You can sleep a while if you want, honey. It's safe."
Jack blinked slowly, then nodded again and curled up against the window. Sam pulled off his warm, brown jacket and turned to cover the younger in it. "Sweet dreams," he whispered.
Jack offered a sleepy smile, "Thank you, Sam."
Sam could almost believe that Jack wasn't soulless as he turned around and fixed his seatbelt. He glanced at Cas and smiled sadly, "It's for the best."
Cas sighed again and pulled into a gas station. "If only it didn't hurt so much to be doing the right thing," he murmured, slipping from the car and going to pay the cashier inside.
Sam leaned back and closed his eyes, letting himself feel everything since Dean had told him the plan. There was sadness, that Mom was gone, that Dean was going this route, that he'd had Sam be the one to pray to Jack. There was wistfulness, that this had never happened, that Jack hadn't lost his soul, that Dean wouldn't choose this path. There was anger, that Jack had killed Mom, that he hadn't listened to Sam, Dean, and Castiel, that Dean was happy to lock up Sam's kid and leave him there for the rest of eternity.
It hit him as they were pulling back into the highway. "Cas, where did you go today?"
"I went to go find another angel. She worked with Joshua, and I thought she'd know how to get in touch with God. I thought maybe we could help him get his soul back if we could find God." Castiel replied as he changed lanes. He flipped the blinker off and glanced at Sam. "What possessed you to go with Dean's plan?"
"I knew Dean wouldn't listen, I knew he would never understand. He's never had his soul taken or left behind or burned away. All he sees when he looks at Jack is the person who killed Mom. He'll understand with time, but I couldn't let him leave Jack in that box. To be honest, I'm not sure Jack's soul is completely gone. Can you feel anything from him?" Sam asked.
Castiel was silent for a moment, then he nodded, "It's faint but it's there. I think it truly was just an accident. He is still a child, he doesn't have full control yet. He's more reactive than proactive right now. I will help him handle his powers."
Sam nodded, "I think I can help with his soul too. It'll be difficult, but I might be able to give him part of mine I think." Sam sighed, "I just wish I knew how to help him more."
Castiel patted Sam's shoulder, "You kept him from the box, Sam. I think you've gone above and beyond."
Sam offered a pained smile and Castiel knew it would be an uphill battle for all three of them, "Maybe we can try to communicate with God again."
Cas nodded, "When we have settled and the sigils have been carved I will go back and try to communicate with God again. For now, though, Sam," Castiel reached over and turned on the radio, tuning it to a jazz station, "For now, you sleep. You will need rest for us to figure out how to fix everything."
Sam nodded and yawned as the jazz music began to make him feel sleepy, cursing Cas internally for figuring out how to put him to sleep the fastest. He laid his head against the window and closed his eyes. With Jack asleep in the back and Cas at the wheel, he felt safe enough to sleep.
For the first time in a long time, something bloomed in his chest that made him feel like everything would be okay.
Hope.
Sam slept, hope fizzling in his chest. Tomorrow would be a better day.