"We're here."
Poe was shaken gently and he bolted straight up in bed. It took him a moment to remember where he was - he had been in a deep sleep, dreamless, and it felt like he could have slept forever. He rubbed his eyes and the world came back to him. He was with Finn, on the Falcon, and Finn was raising the lights and putting away the blanket.
"Sorry to wake you," he said with a smile and brushed Poe's hair out of his eyes. "I know you needed the sleep, but we're about to drop out of hyperspace." Finn ran his thumb over Poe's eyebrow as if to smooth it down and Poe swallowed. "You ready?" Finn asked as he stood up and put his hands on his hips. Poe just sort of nodded dumbly and got out of the bunk.
They walked to the cockpit where Chewie was getting prepped. Rose and Finn sat behind them as they dropped out of hyperspace and into orbit around a brown and blue planet.
"So what are we doing here again?" Rose asked as she peered over Chewie's shoulder.
"The general was pretty vague on who we're meeting and why," Poe answered as he dipped down into the upper atmosphere. "But she was specific about our flight plan. We'll fly in low and park the Falcon under cover, then we have a bit of a hike to our destination."
As they approached the surface, they realized it was a landmass covered with huge blue forests. Poe guided them towards the coordinates, staying right above the trees, and they slowed and lowered into a small opening, just large enough for the Falcon. He slipped them forward between two enormous trees, and as they set the ship down and turned off the engines, they all sat in the cockpit looking through the windows. It was very quiet.
The trees were as big as buildings, with trunks the size of the Falcon and a canopy as tall as a skyscraper. Some sort of fronded fern grew as tall as Chewbacca in the undergrowth.
"Why are all the plants blue?" Rose asked.
"Because Lissian is blue," Chewbacca answered, which didn't make much sense to Poe because the Lissian sun didn't look blue, it looked white like most stars, but Chewie was smarter than him, so whatever.
"There's a trail," Finn said right next to Poe's ear as he pointed off to the left. Sure enough, a trail started between two tall ferns and disappeared into the woods.
"Ok, let's load up and head out."
As everyone retrieved their bags, Poe handed Finn a blaster and a pair of binoculars - "just in case" - and they headed out onto the trail, closing up the ship tight behind them. BB-8 beeped her worry about leaving the ship unattended.
"She'll be fine," he said and patted the droid on its dome. "She's been left in worse places." BB-8 didn't seem comforted, but she rolled along behind them anyway.
They soon found themselves on a trail through lush undergrowth that was dense and enormous. Just the undergrowth was as tall as many forests Poe had been in, and the fiddleheads on the ferns were as large as their packs. At first, they were all on guard with weapons drawn, waiting for a monster to jump out or drop out of the trees or spring up out of the ground. New planets almost always came with something weird and hostile that wanted to eat you.
But as they traveled up the trail, they became distracted by the huge green and orange mushrooms and the blue moss that hung like carpets from the trees. The forest was quiet, with occasional calls from something that sounded like birds. They spotted a small, six-armed, monkey-like thing with yellow fur and huge brown eyes. It stopped on a branch and stared at them for a few seconds before swinging away again. Rose squeed. "No, you can't have one," Poe said with a smile, and they continued on.
Eventually Finn put his blaster away and just looked around with his eyes wide. Poe wondered if the former stormtrooper had ever had the opportunity to walk through a forest like this.
"Wanna play Either Or?" Rose said from where she was walking behind Poe. Poe groaned, Chewbacca said "I'm in," and Finn asked, "What's Either Or?"
"It's a dumb game that kids play in hyperspace," Poe answered and sent a glare back at Rose.
"I thought that little nap would make you feel better, Poe Poe," she retorted. "If you keep that up, your face will get stuck that way."
"Who goes first?" Chewbacca said as he continued to scan the forest with is bowcaster ready. Poe supposed that you don't live to be 250 years old in this business without constant vigilance. Poe followed suit and continued to watch the forest.
"I will," Rose said. "Hey, Finn - Blaster or Lightsaber?
Finn smiled and instantly got it. "Oh. Ok. Well, I've been shooting blasters since I could walk, pretty much, and I was better at it than almost anyone else in my platoon -"
"Well, that's not hard, have you seen how they shoot?" Poe interrupted, but Finn just ignored him.
"- but oh my stars, a lightsaber is the coolest thing I've ever had in my hands. It's so powerful and amazing, the way it hums, the way it feels. From the first time I wrapped my hands around the shaft, it just felt right, and…."
Finn looked up from the trail at Poe's sharp and strangled laugh, saw the look on his face, and instantly looked embarrassed. "I mean, you know what I mean. It's just cool. Dammit, Poe Dameron, get your mind out of the trash." Poe just held up his hands in surrender and sent Finn a wink. Finn had the good grace to continue to look embarrassed, even as he smiled a bit lopsided. Maybe this game wasn't so bad.
"Rose," Chewbacca barked. "Rey or Poe?"
"Hey," Poe objected.
Rose blushed and then smiled shyly. "Well, Rey. Obviously."
"Oh yeah?" Poe sucked in his lower lip and nodded to her, his eyebrows raised in a salacious invitation for her to go on. This sounded interesting.
"You are such a wampa," she sighed as she looked at him. "Rey's been really good to me. Especially after my sister died. I'd never slept without Paige, and Rey let me move in with her. She didn't have to do that."
Poe sobered immediately and turned back to the trail. It's been months, but he still hasn't summoned up the courage to talk with Rose about that because he feels like it was his fault. Paige Tico didn't have to die, and if it wasn't for Poe's complete disregard for the general's orders, Rose's sister would still be alive. He didn't know if he would ever be ready to talk with Rose about that.
"Finn, same question," Chewie grunted.
"Rey," Finn said immediately and threw a mushroom at Poe. "Obviously."
"What is this? Pick On Poe Day?"
Chewbacca just chuckled. "Me too," he said to Finn.
"You people are the worst," Poe grumbled and wished he had something to shoot.
"Ok, you big baby," Rose said teasingly. "Hey Poe, X-Wing or Millennium Falcon?"
"Well, it depends on what I'm trying to do. If I'm going to slip inside a big ship and blow shit up like the amazing pilot that I am, the best in the galaxy, I'll have you know, then an X-wing. If I want to get stuck in space without a functioning hyperdrive and every TIE fighter in the First Order all up in my ass, then the Falcon." Wow, he really was cranky. Chewbacca growled a warning.
"Sorry, Chewie, he just needs more sleep," Finn said as they rounded a huge tree and came to the edge of a clearing. Poe crouched down and put his hands out to slow his friends behind him. Finn walked up beside him and crouched down. "Maybe we can work on that later," Finn mumbled quietly as he crouched close to Poe and pulled out his binoculars. Poe threw him a quick glance and then pulled out his own binoculars.
The were on a small ledge, and the trail continued down a steep, rocky slope on the left. The binoculars blipped and buzzed as he scoped the trail where it re-entered the forest down below.
"Someone's on the next ridge," Finn said and pointed. Up above the forest across from them, Poe spotted it - a person with their own binoculars, sitting on a large, furry mount, looking back at them. "What are they riding?" Finn asked.
"Let me see," Rose said excitedly and grabbed Finn's binoculars. "Oh, wow, that's a tauntaun. I have always wanted to see one of those in person!"
"I thought those were only on ice planets like Hoth," Poe said as he studied the rider and mount. The tauntaun didn't look like what he had imagined. It was short-haired and reddish brown, with long, straight horns. He couldn't tell anything about the rider other than it was humanoid.
"There are all kinds of tauntauns, some of them are good for cold climates, but a lot of them do really well in forests like this," she said with awe in her voice, handing the binoculars back to Finn. "I would love to see one up close."
Finn grabbed the binoculars again and watched the rider. After a moment, he stood up as if pulled.
"She wants us to follow her," he said, his voice quiet and distant, but filled with certainty.
Poe had heard Finn's voice take that ethereal tone before, and it always made him feel a little strange and uncomfortable, like Finn could see things that he couldn't. Poe had never asked about it and was a little afraid to, partially because he wouldn't know what to think if Finn were like Rey, even a little. Unbidden, visions of Kylo Ren - his hand outstretched as he violently ripped secrets from Poe's mind - flashed before him, and Poe felt his heart beat harder and his head pound.
Finn would never do that, he reminded himself sharply. Rey would never do that. Finn's hand reached down and rested on Poe's shoulder gently, a reassuring weight as they watched through the binoculars. Poe took a deep breath.
The person on the tauntaun put down their binoculars and took off their helmet. Long red hair flowed down around the face of a young woman. She raised a hand in their direction as in greeting, and then turned and disappeared behind the ridge.
"Huh," Poe said, putting his binoculars down. He tried to shake the strange feeling from him, but he still felt wary. "She looked friendly enough."
Finn didn't wait or say another word. He just turned and walked down the trail, taking the lead at a fast pace. Poe sighed and they all followed.
They didn't talk as they walked down the rocky hillside and back into the forest. Despite Finn's "feelings" about this woman, Poe still pulled out his blaster. Just in case. Once they were back in the forest, they began climbing switchbacks uphill again, ducking around branches and jumping over small streams. Chewbacca put his bowcaster on his back to pick up BB-8, who beeped and snuggled into Chewie's arms in appreciation. It didn't take long for them to reach the other ridge. As they topped it, they stopped and looked at a wide, open valley surrounded by tall forest. Rose gasped.
Long fields lined with tall, white fences stretched all around a small complex of rounded houses, barns, and outbuildings. The fields held dozens of tauntauns of all colors - blacks with white spots, browns with long black tufts on their heads, silvery greys with sleek muscles. The woman with the red hair was in an open courtyard in the center of the complex, and three more people were coming out to meet her. The young woman turned and pointed to the party on the hill.
"This must be the place," Poe said and Chewbacca howled in agreement as he set BB-8 onto the ground. Finn continued to take the lead as they walked down a wide path and towards the gathering in the courtyard. Poe watched the area, looking for some sort of ambush, but as far as he could tell, this was a simple tauntaun farm out in the middle of nowhere.
As they approached, an old, white-haired woman in long silver robes walked towards them, her arms outstretched. "Chewbacca!" she cried, and after a moment, Chewie howled back and broke into a trot. He embraced the woman as the rest of them approached, and as Chewbacca drew back, Poe recognized her.
"Senator Mothma?" he said in amazement. For before him stood Senator Mon Mothma, hero of the revolution, leader of the republic, and a legend among the resistance. She was also supposed to be dead.
He reached out his hand and she took it. "Yes, yes. The rumors of my death were greatly exaggerated," she said with a wry smile.
"This is amazing," Rose said when it was her turn to shake the woman's hand vigorously. "My parents used to talk about you all the time. We all watched your final speech as Chancellor, when you warned everyone about how we needed to work together and not repeat the failures of our past. I'm just so… oh my goodness, wow."
Senator Mothma turned to Finn and extended her hand. Finn seemed in shock but quickly recovered and shook her hand. He opened and closed his mouth several times before squeaking out, "Hi. I mean, hello. I mean, how do you do?" He winced as she smiled at him gently.
"Very well, thank you. This is my daughter Simi and son-in-law Affred, and my granddaughter Lissa," she said. Her daughter Simi had the same short, bright red hair that Mon Mothma had been famous for, and Poe realized that Lissa, who they'd seen earlier, was barely an adult, perhaps 15 or 16 years old. Her cheeks turned bright pink as they all shook hands.
They followed the senator, who walked slowly and seemed to have an issue with her hip, into the main house. "Let's get you something to drink and then Lissa will show you to your accommodations for the night. Then we'll talk. Chewbacca, stay with me for a moment?"
Lissa led Rose, Finn, Poe and BB-8 to several small, round outbuildings, each with a bed, a small wood stove and a table and chair for sitting. Finn looked hesitant before setting his bag down in his room, giving Poe a quick glance. Poe patted him on the shoulder and gave him a wink before heading to his own room right next door. Poe set his bag on his bed and took out the package Leia had given him, and the four of them returned back to the house.
Once inside, they sat around a large table while Lissa brought out food and drinks. The food was simple but absolutely amazing compared to the terrible food at the base. Poe's mouth was watering before he even had a bite. The senator let them eat and drink in peace, telling them to direct their compliments on the rich meats, cheeses and breads to the skills of her daughter and son-in-law, who ran the farm.
When the eating began to slow, Senator Mothma turned to Poe.
"So what happened?"
Poe paused in taking a bite and then looked at Rose and Finn, who both looked at him nervously. "What do you mean?" he said, trying for nonchalance.
The senator fixed him with a knowing look. "The protocol is, if I don't hear from General Organa for a standard month, and there are no reports of resistance activity, then we are to rendezvous here. Since Leia is not here but you are, I assume she sent you in her stead. Chewbacca said he was on an island with Luke Skywalker" - she raised her eyebrows and huffed in amazement as she looked at Chewie, who just shrugged - "so he wasn't there. He did tell me that everyone escaped on the Millenium Falcon, which means there were very few people left. So. What happened to the resistance?"
Everyone looked at Poe expectantly, and he set down his fork and took a drink of water. Why couldn't this be beer? He could use a beer. Maybe a whole keg. His vision was turning fuzzy around the edges and the glass shook as he set it down.
"Uh… well." He looked at the senator. In the past, in a situation like this he would summon the same bravado and smooth arrogance that he felt and displayed those many months ago, but now it just made him feel tired. He immediately discarded any thoughts of representing their devastating losses as anything other than what they were. He might as well be honest about it.
"We fucked it up. I fucked it up. We took out a Dreadnaught, the Fulminatrix, but we lost all of our bombers and most of our fleet, mostly because I didn't follow orders. And when we ran, they tracked us through hyperspace. We lost everyone else at Crait." He swallowed and didn't think he could say much more as he rubbed his eyes and fought the overwhelming urge to get up from the table and go throw up outside. A chair scraped and he felt Finn's hand squeeze his leg under the table. Poe reached down and grabbed Finn's hand, holding it tightly as he cleared his throat and looked back up at the senator.
Mon Mothma looked terribly sad, her care-worn face drawn and serious, as she exchanged looks with her daughter and son-in-law. But she did not look surprised.
"We heard about the Dreadnaught. The First Order tried to hide it at first, but there was no way they could keep something that big out of the news feeds. And Commander Dameron -" She looked him in the eye to make sure he was listening. "Many people died before you came along, and many more will die in the months and years to come if the First Order is not stopped. The fact that you are sitting here means that you are a survivor, and sometimes that's all that is needed: someone who was there, who can tell the story and light the fires."
"And you are not responsible, Poe," Rose said. He turned to her warily. "My sister knew what she was doing. We all did. We knew the risk, but we did it anyway."
"Leia told me to turn back, Rose," Poe said, his voice rough and his breathing short and rapid. "And I literally turned her off. I didn't want to hear it. I was their leader and I let them down." He looked around the table. "I let you all down."
"You didn't kill Han," Chewbacca moaned.
"You didn't put me in the medbay with a lightsaber wound in my back," Finn said tensely.
"You took out Starkiller Base. You saved everyone," Rose said quietly. "You're a hero, Poe."
BB-8 rolled up and bumped into his leg, letting out pips and whistles of support.
Poe couldn't handle this. He covered his face with his free hand to hide his eyes, which had started to water. Finn reached up and pulled him into a strong hug, whispering into his ear, "I know you think you are responsible, but you're not. It's not your fault. We're saving people's lives, we're saving the galaxy, and we will all follow you where ever you go. I'll follow you anywhere, Poe Dameron."
The room fell silent, and Poe felt a deep shame, for how he's acted, for his guilt, for letting it all out right here in front of everyone. So much for the cock-sure flyboy.
"Let's see what's in this package, shall we?" the senator said after a few quiet moments, and she pulled open the box in front of her. Poe was grateful to have the eyes turn away from him, and he took a deep breath as he wiped his face on his sleeve. Finn didn't remove his arm around Poe's shoulders as they watched Mon Mothma open the box.
Inside were maps with bases and hidden redoubts, a long letter to Mon written in Leia's own hand, and a data pad that looked like it had lists and manifests. "This looks like every lead she had for possible support," the senator said quietly as she looked through the data. "This is very sensitive. I can see why she didn't want to broadcast this over channels. She must trust you all very much to deliver this to me," she said with a pointed look at Poe. He just took a deep breath and nodded.
They spent the next hour looking over the maps and data, and each of them contributed something to the discussion. Mon and Affred, who turned out to be not only her son-in-law but also one of her most trusted advisors during her chancellery, were able to add political and strategic information to the data pad, with notes on connections, finances, who to talk to and where. After a while, Lissa and Rose disappeared into another room and some music started to play, and Simi brought out glasses and several bottles of wine.
"Oh gods, you have no idea," Poe said after he was handed a glass. He didn't think he had ever tasted a wine as sparkly and delicious as this god-like nectar. Finn smiled, his arm back around Poe's waist, and they all toasted each other, the resistance, and those they've lost. Finn didn't let go of Poe for the rest of the conversation, and as they continued to discuss tactics and the wine warmed Poe's cheeks, he thanked the force more than once for the closeness of his friends and how much he loved them.
"So Chewie tells me you used to be a stormtrooper," Mon Mothma said after another hour, her voice careful and neutral as she poured Finn another glass of wine. Simi and Affred had already gone to bed and Chewie had wandered off into the living room.
Finn tensed a little at the comment, but Poe slung his arm around Finn's neck and responded for him.
"This guy saved my life," Poe said, looking at his friend with warmth. "He smuggled me off that Star Destroyer and shot up the whole deck. You should have seen him! It was something else. I don't know what I would do without him. He's my best friend, you know," he said and shot a smile at the senator.
Finn looked a little taken aback. "I am?"
Now it was Poe's turn to look surprised. "Of course you are… who else?"
"I don't know. I mean it's great. I'm glad. Really glad. I just… didn't know."
The senator was looking at them shrewdly.
"Let me guess, commander. General Organa ordered you to bring Finn along on this mission, didn't she?" Poe didn't stop looking at Finn, at his brown eyes softened with wine, and his mouth so full and easy. He almost forgot the senator had asked a question, but then he nodded absentmindedly. "She's a wily one, that princess. This is why the rebellion will never die, because of people like you and the love you have for each other. Don't forget that."
Good advice, Poe thought as he watched Finn's face, so close. So inviting. But he just sighed and took another large drink of wine, and Finn looked away, that same small smile on his face from the Falcon.
And then the music changed. It got louder, for one, with a heavy beat and dirty lyrics, and Poe turned towards the other room where the girls were. Someone whooped, and suddenly the beat pulled irresistibly at him.
"What is that?" he asked the senator, the awe clear in his voice.
"I have no idea, but it seems to be popular with the teenagers on Coruscant."
Poe's head slowly started to bob and a smile overcame him. He looked at Finn and bit his lower lip, his eyebrows going up in an invitation.
"Do you mind if we continue this conversation in the morning, senator?" he said without breaking eye contact with Finn. Senator Mothma gave a small laugh.
"It's way past my bedtime anyway, boys, so I'm happy to talk again tomorrow. Good night, gentlemen."
Poe grabbed Finn by the collar and dragged him into the central living room. It was a wide, warm, high-ceilinged room with a large fluffy rug and comfortable couches. Chewie was sitting with his back against a couch working on some sort of complicated block puzzle, a bottle of wine sitting next to him, and Lissa and Rose were dancing in the middle of the room, spinning and laughing. Lissa stopped immediately and blushed as soon as she saw Poe and Finn, but Poe let go of Finn's shirt, set down his wine glass and began to dance, biting his lips together and scrunching his eyebrows. Soon, Lissa was laughing and dancing again too, and Poe grabbed the two women and taught them a funky line dance with lots of pointing and hip grinding. Soon they were all giggling and gyrating on the shaggy rug.
The song changed to another great tune, this one a little slower but still with a heavy beat, and Poe turned to Finn. And, holy fucking yoda, the look on Finn's face made him want to get right up in there, like, right now. Finn's mouth was slightly open and he was staring intensely at Poe, his eyes a little wide. It looked like maybe he wasn't breathing as he stood there absolutely still with a glass of wine in his hand.
Perfect. He was fucking perfect.
Poe pointed right at Finn's chest and started to dance over to him. Finn seemed to come back into his body and he started to shake his head. "Oh no. Nope. No thank you."
"Oh yes," Poe said in beat to the music. He gently grabbed Finn's glass and set it down, then took his hand and pulled him over towards the rug.
"Uh, Poe? Um, I don't know… how to dance. I mean, I've never danced."
Poe paused for a second to register that remark, everything that it meant, of growing up without music and dancing. What the actual fuck? But he quickly glided past the intense sadness, which felt like it could knock the wind out of him if he let it, and back into the giddy energy of the room. He just shook his head slowly and pulled Finn up against him. He pulled Finn's hand in close and put his other hand on Finn's hip. "It doesn't matter," he said as he pressed his cheek against Finn's. He smelled just like Finn should smell, of leather and warmth and something smokey. Poe closed his eyes and began to sway with the music. "There's no right way to dance."
Finn was breathing hard as he stood there unmoving. But Poe just pulled him in closer, crouching down a little so they fit together, and Finn took in a sudden breath. Then Poe began to walk back and twist back and forth as he looked at Finn. He winked, exaggerated and goofy sexy, and then scrunched up his face and rose up to his toes while holding their hands out wide. He tossed his head back dramatically.
It had the effect he was hoping for. Finn got a twinkle to his eye and tilted his head to the side as if Poe was crazy. But then his head started to bob with the music and his shoulders started to pop a little.
"Gods dammit you're beautiful," Poe said under his breath as he shook his head back and forth and closed his eyes. "This is the best damn night of my life."
There were many bottles of wine. Most of it went to the Wookie, who was now passed out on the couch, but more than enough went to Poe. He was starting to think that maybe that was a mistake, and the vague thought passed through his head that he never really learns from these lessons, does he? He just shrugged at the thought and reached for Finn. Who was lying on the floor. Also very, very drunk.
"Com'mon, big boy, time for bed," he said and pulled on Finn's hand. It was only partially successful, however - Finn did look very heavy, now that Poe thought about it - and Lissa, who was soon going to be the last one standing (Rose had gone to bed over an hour ago), helped Finn up. With Lissa on one side and Poe on the other, they managed to get Finn out the door and over to his cabin. His cabin? His hut? Is this a hut?
"S'is a hut?" he slurred, but Lissa just laughed. They managed to get up the three steps and inside the door without anyone breaking anything, and Lissa guided their fall into bed. She patted them both on the shoulders.
"You going to be ok?" she asked. She was so sweet, that Lissa.
"You're a good girl," he said to her as Finn gave her a thumbs up, his face planted firmly in a pillow. "We'll be fiiiiiine."
She patted them again and then left, closing the door behind her.
"S'is your room 'r my room?" Poe asked as he settled his head on the pillow. Finn just gave a floppy shrug without opening his eyes.
"I should prolly go," he said, but didn't make any move to get up.
"No stay," Finn slurred and then pawed Poe loosely. Poe turned over and wiggled up to Finn then pulled a cover over them both.
"We should prolly take off our boots," Poe said, his head heavy on the pillow and his eyes closed. Finn nodded behind him.
"Finn?" Another nod. "This was the best night ever." Another nod. "You're awesome." Another nod. "I love you." A sigh and a mumbled something that sounded like "M'f you too" and Finn raised his head just enough to kiss the back of Poe's head and then flop down again. Poe grabbed Finn's arm and wrapped it around himself, pulling him close.
Best night ever.