Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters.
It was a cold, rainy afternoon in Forks. Typical. As much as I loved being back, I certainly hadn't changed my opinion on the weather. When your everyday life involves travelling all over, mostly to warm locations, all this rain is a bit of a culture shock. I had wrapped up in Charlies lumberjack jacket and a pair of old motorcycle boots that I found in my closet. They were no Louboutin's but they were definitely comfier.
Charlie and Sue were due back from their trip later that evening, so I had decided to cook them supper to welcome them home. It was only a couple of days before I left for Hawaii, so I wanted to make the most of my time with them both.
I headed out to garage to grab some gas for the rental car. Charlie always liked to buy in bulk when the price went down. My Dad is nothing if not sensible. I flicked the light switch and was hit with a shit tonne of nostalgia.
There she is.
My first car. Well, truck. Rusty red and battered. I can't believe Charlie kept it after so much time had passed. The keys were laying on the would be rude not to take the old girl out for a spin.
I climbed in the driver's side and put the key in the ignition. The engine ticked over for a few second's but she soon came alive. I pressed play on the stereo and the music blasted so loud, I nearly jumped out of my skin. I laughed, remembering the good times I'd had in this truck. Starting out onto the road, I headed for the direction of the reservation. The stores there always stocked way fresher produce than Forks had.
I drove along the long, winding roads singing my heart out to the songs on the radio. The rain was pouring down onto the windscreen, the sounds of the droplets hitting the roof were a welcome comfort.
Just as I passed the border out of Forks, I heard a loud CLUNK. Shit. Good one Bella. As lovely as nostalgia was, the BMW rental wouldn't have cut out on me.
I pulled the hood of Charlies jacket over my head and stepped out into the pouring rain. I could barely see, the droplets were coming down that hard and fast. Lifting the hood, I tried to figure out what had happened. Not that it was any good. I had absolutely no idea what I was looking for!
"Bella?!" I heard a voice shout.
Peeping around the bonnet of the car, I saw Megan in her car with the window wound down.
"Oh, hey" I mumbled.
"Do you need a ride? Why don't you come back to our house and give Jacob a call?" She suggested, sweetly.
Our house.
I couldn't think of anything worse. But for some reason, the words fell out before my mouth engaged with my brain.
"Yeah, sure. Thanks!"
I closed the hood of the truck and locked it up. Jumping into the passenger seat of Megan's car, I removed my hood and shivered.
"The rain this time of year really sucks, huh?" She asked, rhetorically.
"This time of year? As far as I can remember, rain is a common presence in Forks for like, ninety percent of the year!" I teased.
"Is that why you decided to move to Los Angeles?" She asked.
"…"
"Sorry, I shouldn't be prying" She said softly. She was so hard to hate.
"No, its fine. Yeah, the weather certainly had something to do with it!" I laughed.
Megan steered through the reservation and pulled up to a quaint but beautiful house just on the outskirts, surrounded by woodland. I couldn't imagine Jake living anywhere else. This was perfect for him. And it could have been perfect for me once upon a time.
I followed her up to the front door. Walking inside, I removed my soaking wet jacket and Megan handed me a towel to dry off.
"Thank you, its really nice of you to help" I said genuinely.
"Not a problem, any friend of Jacobs is welcome in our home. Would you like some coffee?" She asked.
"Yeah, sure thanks" I replied.
Friends.
The more she spoke, the worse I felt.
While Megan was in the kitchen, I took the opportunity to do something really stupid. Snoop.
I walked over to the sideboard and picked up a hand carved wooden photo frame. Tears filled my eyes as I studied the picture it held.
It was Jake and Megan on their wedding day. She wore a beautiful lace gown and a beautifully understated head dress that laced her hair line with pearls. Her smile was so wide. She looked so happy. And so did he. Standing behind her in his white shirt and trousers, he looked down at her with such adoration. They looked happy. Really happy.
"Hey Bella, why don't you call Jacob while I finish up in here! I'm sure he can grab one of the guys and tow your truck back the garage!" Megan shouted from the kitchen.
I placed the frame back down on the sideboard and wiped the tears from my eyes. Taking my cell phone out of my pocket, I pulled up Jakes number and pressed the call button. It rang for a few moments before he answered.
"Hey, I wondered when you were going to call" he beamed down the phone.
"Uh yeah, hi. Listen, I've got a problem. My truck broke down just outside the Res and I need to get it towed back to Charlies. Can you help?" I asked him bluntly.
"Oh, yeah sure. I'll be right there. Wait in the truck Bells, it's freezing out there."
I was silent for a moment before I spoke.
"I'm not by the truck Jake, I'm in your house"
The line went silent.
"Megan saw me on the side of the road and invited me over to dry off. She suggested that I call you for help" I explained.
"I'll be there soon"
He hung up.
At that moment, Megan walked into the lounge area with two steaming hot cups of coffee. She handed one to me and sat back on the sofa opposite me. I sipped at it and smiled at the warmth in my stomach.
"So, you and Jake huh? How did you meet?" I pried. I shouldn't have.
"Oh, we met a local fundraiser a few years back. I was in charge of the face painting but once again the weather was awful, so nobody was interested. I guilted him into letting me paint a butterfly on his forehead" she laughed recalling the memory of it.
I sipped at my coffee awkwardly, not wanting it to end as when it did, I'd have no excuse to not be talking.
"What about you, Bella? How did you and Jake start hanging out? It must be so strange coming back here after all this time seeing how much everyone's changed!" She beamed.
The front door swung open. Thank god.
Jake stood there, his clothing soaked through. He looked at me. Then Megan. And then back to me.
"So, you want me to drop you back home at the same time?" He asked me. I think the only answer I was supposed to give was yes.
I nodded and stood up from my seat.
"Thank you so much for your help Megan. I really appreciate it. And thanks for the coffee!" I said.
"Anytime Bella!" She smiled.
I walked out to the tow truck and climbed in the passenger side, Jake in the driver's seat. It was a good five minutes before either of us spoke.
"I'm sorry you keep ending up in these situations, Bells" he apologised. He put his hand on my leg and gave it a squeeze.
I tensed beneath his touch. And he noticed.
"You looked really happy at your wedding, Jake"
He drove maybe another half a mile before pulling over on the side of the road. Again, neither of us spoke. Not for what felt like a lifetime. The tension was clear to see.
"I..I don't know what you want me to say Bella?" He shrugged.
"I don't want you to say anything. I guess I just forget sometimes that you married her for a reason. She's really wonderful, Jake." I sobbed.
Jake slid over a little further towards me and rested his palm on my shoulder.
"Bella, this is a complicated situation. I love you. I want you. But I can't just walk out on Megan. She…saved me. When things were really bad, she was there. I don't want to call her a distraction but that is what she was. And I mean that in a good way. If it weren't for her Bella, I don't know where I would be. Probably still hooking up with women that I don't even like just to stop feeling. I've never really spoken to you about how bad things got when you left because I don't want you to shoulder that guilt. I know you Bells, and I know damn well that you would."
He was right. I definitely would.
"I think you're right. I don't think right now is the best time to discuss it either. I think we should just get my truck home, okay?" I suggested. Although in reality, I was insisting. Politely. Kind of.
We pulled up outside Charlies around forty-five minutes later and neither of us had said a word the entire time. Jake helped me push the truck back in the garage and then walked me to the front door.
Turning to face him, the look on his face pained my heart. So many emotions written all over his beautiful face. Sadness, anger, guilt, love.
"Jake, I can't invite you inside. Not today. I'm already a shitty person but of all the days, today is not the day to be aiding you in cheating on your wife." I told him.
He didn't say anything, but he nodded in mild agreement. I could see the shame on his face.
"Listen, I'm leaving in a couple of days" I reminded him.
"I know. Do you think its been off my mind for a single second?" He snarked. I let it go.
"If you need me, you know where I am. I just need a little time to process what the hell is actually going on here. My head is completely screwed, and I feel like we're getting lost in the fantasy a little here Jake. Like, what's the plan? Keep sneaking around? Secret phone calls? A hook up or two whenever I visit? Which, lets face it, is still going to be a fairly rare occurrence. We need to take some time and think about what it is we both want out of this. Before it gets out of hand."
He just nodded, pulled me in for a hug and then walked away.
Before it gets out of hand.
Ha.
Thanks for reading x