Today is the start of the second half of this year at Yokai Academy already? It feels like it was just a couple days ago that the year just started and we're already half way done. Right now Mizore and I are walking to school together as she holds my hand in her tight, vise like grip, when all of a sudden this random guy with long black hair and a doofy expression jumps out of a nearby bush. "Are you Reiji Oni?", the boy accusingly questions me with his finger pointed in my face.
"Yeah, who's asking?", I growl back to him with a glare as I step between him and Mizore.
"My name is Fong-Fong Wong, a first year. Nice to meet you, Reiji Oni.", he politely introduces himself with a bow of his head, at least I think this person's a he.
"Okay Fong-Fong, what the hell do you want?", I question him as I lighten my glare.
"Oh, I just want you under my eternal employment is all. I've been looking for someone like you to become a member of my family. You'll be mine and mine alone!", the strange boy boldly replies with a wicked grin on his face.
I look over to Mizore with a raised eyebrow as I ask her, "Is this guy real or am I seeing and hearing things?"
"He's real. You should break the news to him.", she replies with a slight chuckle.
"Sorry Fong-Fong, but I'm already happily married to Mizore so I don't think I'm going to become part of your family.", I answer him with a dismissive wave of my hand before Mizore and I take our leave.
"Marry? No, I'm asking you to join the largest Chinese mafia in all history.", Fong-Fong blurts out in disbelief.
"Still no, now get lost or I'll kick your ass back to the bronze age.", I reply one last time as we continue to the school, waving back to the boy with one hand over my shoulder as I hold Mizore's cold hand in the other.
We eventually reach the Newspaper Club room where everyone else, except for Moka and Tsukune, are already waiting for us. Tsukune and Moka show up as soon as we sit down, busting through the door in a panic before slamming it shut. As the duo stops to catch their breath, they're met with a series of confused looks from everyone in the room. "What the hell got into you two? Getting chased by another possible member of your harem, Tsukune?", I jokingly ask the boy, causing his face to turn a dark shade of red.
"Don't say such things! Some guy asked to marry me!", Tsukune nervously cries out in terror as he grasps at his head at a loss.
"You're attracting guys now too? Man, those harem powers are really starting to turn on you, aren't they?", I continue to joke around with the kid before Mizore shuts me up with a freezing hand over my mouth.
"So, who is this guy?", Mizore asks as she continues to keep me quiet with her hand.
"Fong-Fong Wong.", he begrudgingly replies as he takes a seat at the table.
"You mean the son of the boss of the Wong family? He's famous among the first years. He was probably asking you to join the mafia, Tsukune.", Kokoa notes as she reads some magazine before one of the images she sees gives her a nosebleed.
As our confused gazes meet, Mizore lets go of my face and I say, "That explains why he asked me to join the mafia, but why would he want us in his family's though?", as I take the magazine off of Kokoa and look at it. It's a Yaoi magazine and I throw it out the window while grumbling to myself, "Who the hell reads this kind of stuff in school!?"
"Why did you throw it out the window!? I was enjoying that!", Kokoa furiously shouts as she dangles her tiny body out the window, desperately trying to see where it went.
Out of seemingly nowhere, we hear Fong-Fong calmly answer us by saying, "I want you guys to join because you're strong. You guys are becoming well known all around the Underworld. The son of the guard dog of the Underworld, demon Reiji Oni, and the destructive force known as Tsukune Aono.". We all turn to see he's standing in the doorway watching us with a sly smile. "You recently beat up an evil Yakuza organization in the human world, correct? And then you fought with that Fairy Tale organization and beat up one of their higher up members. I'm more than impressed. That's superb strength. Up until now I haven't encountered that even a little bit. This is why I entered into Yokai Academy! To find strong monsters like myself to join my family! Won't you two reconsider my offer and join my family?", Fong-Fong says as he enters the room.
"Is that all you wanted to say? If that's the case then just give up your hope. Tsukune isn't joining the mafia just because of your selfish request and I doubt Reiji will be convinced either.", Kurumu retorts as she blocks Fong-Fong from getting any closer to Tsukune. The rest of the girls all stand between him and Tsukune too, blocking his path entirely with their arms stretched out to keep him from going around as well.
Fong-Fong is taken aback by this and shouts, "What the, don't get in my way! Besides what's with you all, what relation do you have with Tsukune!?"
Moka says, "We're his friends!"
Kurumu says, "His lover!"
Yukari says, "Concubine!"
And Ruby says, "Toy!"
This causes Tsukune to panic and shout, "Hey! What are you saying as you please!? Wait, what do you mean 'toy'!?"
"As expected from one of the strongest men in school. He has a whole harem at his disposal! He's only a student and he already has everything from concubines to toys!", Fong-Fong mutters to himself with a surprised look on his face.
This makes Tsukune even more flustered than before as he shouts, "What are you saying!? Don't encourage them!"
"But it will be troublesome for you to forget. In the mafia world it doesn't matter how many women there are and what complaints they make. It's like the human concept of Polygamy! No matter how many wives you have collected, the Wong family will take care of them all! Now, will you still say that you won't become my friend Tsukune!?", Fong-Fong triumphantly notes, seeming quite impressed with his plan of giving him all the girls at once.
"What are you talking about!? I don't want something like that! Neither does everyone else, right guys?", Tsukune asks as he turns to the others who're all huddled together.
"Can we legally do that? All of us get married to Tsukune that is?", Kurumu nervously asks the others in their huddle.
"It could work.", Yukari notes with a slight nod.
"Polygamy was a more profitable system for women originally anyway.", Ruby adds with a light blush on her face.
I can't help but let out a heavy sigh at their idiocy before saying, "Tsukune doesn't have to join the mafia just to have multiple wives you know. Now if you can't bring anything better to the table then you're not worth anyone's time."
"Besides, I don't like the mafia.", Tsukune nervously adds as he dismissively waves his hand in front of his face.
"Fine, then we'll fight and if I win then you have to join the Wong family! I will fight you first Tsukune!", Fong-Fong shouts as he pulls a slip of paper from his sleeve.
"What? Don't just decide that yourself!", Tsukune nervously cries out in fear.
"Sh-shut up! A duel is how men solve their problems! The winner is in the right!", Fong-Fong says as coins fly out from his sleeve and he makes a coin sword out of them. Not the best weapon honestly, but definitely flashy.
"A coin sword and that charm! A summoning technique!?", Yukari shouts as soon as she sees the sword and paper combine.
"I admit, Tsukune is strong. However, I am the son of the mafia boss! My power allows me to summon friendly monsters to fight by my side! I can't control what I will summon however, so there are occasional flaws. I am a Yasha, in control of a hundred other monsters! Now, let us fight!", Fong-Fong says as a third eye appears on his forehead. He summons a long dragon like thing and launches Tsukune out the window before chasing after him.
"We should probably do something about that.", I say as I get up from my seat and look out the giant hole in the wall.
"No kidding! Tsukune is in serious danger! We have to help him!", Moka furiously shouts at my sudden laziness.
"This guy doesn't even seem that tough. Tsukune should be able to use his vampire blood to punch this guy into dust.", I reply with a shrug of my shoulders.
"What about you guys?", Moka asks as she looks over to the others. Ruby, Kurumu and Yukari are all holding up a sign saying, "Polygamy". Suddenly the wind blows in through the giant hole in the wall at just the right angle for Kokoa's magazine to come back and land right in her lap. When she sees the cover she snatches it before I get the chance to throw it away again while greedily cheering out, "It's mine! All mine!"
"I'm going after Tsukune! If anyone wants to go make themselves useful you can follow me!", Moka shouts before running down to catch up to Tsukune and Fong-Fong.
Mizore walks over to me before tapping me on the shoulder and asking, "Are we really not going to do anything about Tsukune and that Fong-Fong guy?"
With a light groan escaping my lips, I look out the gaping hole in our room's wall before saying, "We'll go keep an eye on him, but I'd rather not interfer if he can handle himself. He needs to learn how to fight his own battles against weaker enemies like this clown." Yukari, Mizore and I look out the hole in the wall and Mizore makes an ice slide down so we can catch up to them quicker.
We eventually catch up to them and we hear Fong-Fong shout, "What exactly do you want anyway!? You can't maintain your harem while living an honest and respectable life in the human world! Are you planning on abandoning those girls to uncertainty once that time comes?!"
Yukari uses her cards to cut through his charm, causing the monster to fade away into nothing while she notes, "The rule is that if the seal is destroyed then the monster summoned by that seal will be banished. Just like this."
"Now crush him and be done with it Tsukune.", I call out to the nervous boy as Fong-Fong jumps down to the ground.
"I'll just call out my next monster!", Fong-Fong pridefully boasts as he attempts to summon another monster. As he attaches another seal to his shiny toy sword, he calls out for the beast to appear, but only manages to summon a small chick, which was less than impressive, giving Tsukune enough time to run rather than just crush him then and there. We make it into the school, ducking into the entrance for a moment in an attempt to lose that freak.
"We should be safe for now.", Yukari says as she tries to catch her breath.
"That guy sure is persistent. Can't he take a hint?", Mizore grumbles to herself as she rests for a moment with her back pressed against the cold concrete. That seems a bit hypocritical, but I'm not going to bring that up to her.
"Thanks guys.", Tsukune thanks us as he tries to catch his breath.
"No problem, Tsukune, but you need to show that guy you mean what you say. Put him in his place. Preferably six feet under if you can.", I say as I peek out the doorway. I see nothing coming, but that doesn't mean he isn't trying to summon some other crazy creature somewhere.
"It struck pretty close to home didn't it, those words he said.", Yukari questions the boy, earning everyone's confused gaze. "You'll eventually have to choose someone and then you'll have to be separated from everyone else. When that happens most of our friends from the Newspaper Club will probably split up. It will probably be impossible for everyone to continue being friends at that point.", Yukari continues and as she does she gets a sad look on her face. "That is the most correct future, so you've already prepared yourself for that eventuality, right?", Yukari asks as she turns away from him. Tsukune says nothing and a wicked smile comes across the toddler's face before she says, "I'm going to make you look stupid." She drops a wash tub on his head and he falls to his knees as she giggles to herself.
"Was that really necessary?", Mizore asks with a slightly annoyed glance at the girl.
"Not really, but it made me feel a bit better.", Yukari says in a lighthearted tone.
Tsukune manages to get to his feet while Yukari says, "It's troublesome choosing a single wife out of the four of us. I don't want to be dumped either. So wouldn't it be more interesting to try your hand at Polygamy?"
"Why are you girls so interested in that idea!?", Tsukune shouts out in confusion as he finally reaches his breaking point for what I can only guess is the 50th time this morning.
"Probably because that gives them a one hundred percent chance of marrying you. They all get what they want that way, but it seems like that isn't what you want.", I calmly note as I make my way back into the hallway.
"Who cares about that!? If Tsukune were a real man then he'd try to woo every woman to make them happy!", Yukari furiously proclaims as she takes a jab at the boys pride. She starts to look at him with a wild look as she says, "So to do that, how about you join the mafia? That way you can share a single bed with all of us."
She slowly backs him up into a corner before Mizore uses her ice claws to pick her up by her head as she tells the tiny witch, "You need to cool your head. We should try to put more space between us and the enemy, that way we have more time to react to whatever they throw at us."
"Sounds like a plan. Let's go Tsukune. And when this guy eventually catches up you'll just punch him into oblivion.", I agree with the new plan as I head out the door. Mizore quickly follows behind me with Yukari still held inbetween her icy claws and Tsukune following close behind.
As we're running, I sense a large amount of monster energy coming from behind us and when I turn my head to look at what it might be, I see Moka and Fong-Fong running towards us. Tsukune sees them too as he seems to hear their frantic running before quickly asking, "What are Moka and Fong-Fong running from?"
Mizore and I look up above them, and lone behold we see a giant fire bird, a phoenix, flying through the air. "What is that huge thing!?", Tsukune gasps as soon as he sees the flaming bird in the sky.
"Did he summon that thing!?", I furiously ask myself as the two finally catch up.
"Tsukune! He lost control of it so we have to deal with it!", Moka shouts as she manages to run past us.
We all start running together with Moka in the lead while trying to avoid this damn thing as it's shooting small balls of fire at us inbetween its attempts to divebomb us. It looks at Tsukune and seems to mutter to itself, "Tsukune? So you are my target. It's a good place to meet you. I shall kill you!"
"Why does it want to kill me!?", Tsukune exclaims in complete terror.
"He's a monster I summoned. It's obvious he would target you Tsukune. He's a phoenix, a powerful creature that's even able to blow away mountains. It's one of the strongest monsters known to our kind, I managed to summon it as a baby chick somehow.", Fong-Fong explains as it chases after us.
"Can't you banish it or something?", Mizore asks the idiot summoner, but he only shakes his head.
"That's impossible. It stole away the charm that makes it listen to me. If I don't run then it'll be dangerous to me as well.", Fong-Fong fearfully explains as he runs for his life from the flames he helped summon.
"I'll kill all of you!", the phoenix screams out, his threat echoing throughout the entire school campus.
"Then how the hell do we stop that thing!?", Tsukune asks as his frustration starts to get teh better of him.
"Looks like we're all in the same boat then. I guess it's fate that you two end up joining me then.", Fong-Fong replies with a stupid smile on his face.
"Like I'd join a team with your dumb ass on it.", I growl back at the failed summoner as I turn to see the damn thing dive bombing us.
"He's coming! We need to do something!", Tsukune shouts.
"Fine, let's kill the damn thing and splatter this dumbass later.", I say as I stop and wait for the thing to attack. Tsukune also stops and we take the hit head on. Even though we caught the attack it still caused a decent amount of damage to the ground around us.
Everyone looks back at us to see that we stopped the damn thing and Fong-Fong asks, "What the? How did they stop it!?"
"Tsukune!", Moka screams as she comes running over to help us.
"Oh thanks Moka, I'm totally not here at all. This is all Tsukune's leg work.", I sarcastically grumble to myself as I continue to hold the beast back.
Moka rushes over and grabs ahold of the thing's beak too and says, "Hold on! I'll help too! I don't want you to lose Tsukune. If you lose then you won't have any other choice but to join the mafia! I don't want that to happen at all. Because I don't think that you should be involved in polygamy!"
I look back at Mizore and the others and their faces are priceless. Yukari looks super pissed and Mizore and Fong-Fong just look confused. "Moka, isn't your father a polygamist? And without that you wouldn't have your sisters, right?", I retort with a slight chuckle.
"Reiji, now isn't exactly the best time for that.", Tsukune groans as he struggles to hold the thing in place.
"How dare you three make a mockery of me!? Unforgivable! I won't forgive you! I won't show you any mercy!", the thing shouts as it shoved its head at us trying to bury us in the ground. It laughs as it says, "Pieces of trash just like I thought."
I let out a hearty laugh in return before saying, "This giant flaming chicken doesn't know when to shut the hell up."
"You're alive!?", it gasps in complete disbelief.
"Yeah, but you have more dangerous things to worry about at the moment.", I say as Inner Moka jumps out from the smoke and kicks the phoenix right in the beak.
The thing crashes to the ground while using its last breath to cry out, "I'll go, I got cocky. Sorry.", before faiding away into nothingness.
"That's the first time I've seen one of those. It was pretty strong for a newborn, though he lacked experience.", I say as Moka sticks her landing.
"Did you two really need my help just to fight that?", Moka asks us.
"Eh, not really, but if we don't call you in to fight every now and then you'll get rusty, right?", I chuckle back at the vampire, but she doesn't seem too amused.
"Tsukune, you should've been able to beat both that bird and Fong-Fong all by yourself. You need to work on relying on your own strength rather than on others.", Moka says to Tsukune as Fong-Fong walks up to them.
"You beat that phoenix with a single kick! Amazing! It's too amazing!", Fong-Fong says as gets a closer look at Moka's other form.
"I guess you're right. Now do you understand? There are all sorts of strong people who exist in this world. If you want to make friends then there are people who are stronger than I am.", Tsukune tries to explain to him.
Fong-Fong doesn't seem to get it and says, "But if that amazing woman is working for you then you must be even stronger, right? I see! Could it be that this woman is legally Tsukune's wife!? An invincible partnership!"
"That Moka as Tsukune's wife!? HA! That's great! Fucking comedy gold Fong-Fong, comedy fucking gold.", I say as I walk over to Mizore.
"What's so funny about that!?", Moka furiously shouts as she turns to me with a wicked glare and a clenched fist.
"The fact that he thinks that you two are married! Or that he thinks that Tsukune could actually pick somebody from his harem to marry!", I say before busting into uncontrollable laughter.
"You think I'm part of his harem!?", Moka furiously growls as she takes a step towards me.
"You're half of Moka so technically you are by default. You don't get an option, sorry.", I happily reply before I continue laughing.
Moka seems beyond sick of my mocking, but before she can do anything, Kurumu and Ruby show up in Chinese dresses while cheering out: "Polygamy, polygamy." The vampire decides to let off a little bit of her rage after finding her new targets before kicking them into submission along with Fong-Fong for starting my mocking.
"You're just mad because you know it's true and you can't say that it isn't.", I reply in a more serious tone.
"Shut up.", she growls back as she tries to find the rosary. Little does she know I have it hidden behind my back. "Tsukune, where's my rosary?", Moka asks the boy with a stern glare.
Tsukune looks all around for it, checking his pockets for the cross, but can't find it and says, "It was just here a minute ago."
"But seriously though Tsukune, you should at least consider polygamy. It could work. Focus on the word COULD there.", I say to him as I pretend to look around for the rosary as I slip it into my shirt pocket.
"I don't know if that's what I want though. But if it will make everyone happy then I might just have to.", Tsukune nervously suggests, causing Moka to blush a little.
"Hey, I saw that!", I mock the violent vampire.
"What!?", she shouts confused by what I meant.
"You were blushing while looking at Tsukune! See, you are a part of the harem!", I continue mocking her as I pull out the rosary from my pocket.
"You had it hidden this whole time!?", Tsukune asks in frustration.
"I'm a demon, what did you expect? I was waiting for that moment when she thought we weren't looking and I got it. Here you go, blushy.", I say as I toss the rosary to her.
"Reiji, stop picking on Moka.", Mizore says to me with a cold glare.
"Fine. I was teasing her a little. She's just always has her walls up and I just love poking holes in them.", I say as I walk over to Mizore.
We head back to our classes later that day and Fong-Fong continues to chase Tsukune around the school trying to convince him to join the mafia. Though he seems to be waiting to ask me again.