"My past?"
"Yeah! Well I mean you are mostly not a mystery considering that you are the Warrior of Light. But what about before that? what made you to the woman that you are?" Said the Miqo'te woman who sat across the table to me.
"So you want to know about before I came to Eorzea?" I replied taking a puff from my Kiseru pipe.
"Yes that you are from the far east is obvious but the rest is a mystery."
"Well normally I would be happy for it to remain that way" I said even if I knew it would pointless to try change the subject now.
I took another bloss and eyed the woman who was doing the cat version of sad puppy eyes.
Leah a Healer I met a few months back that have really made a place for herself in my life and shows no signs of leaving.
I gave off a small laugh and said "Well fine. Of all people you deserve to know. But I warn you this is not the most happiest of stories."
Leah straighten up in her seat eagerly waiting for me to begin.

"In the far east I was not known as a hero. Far from it. Born in a tribe known for its highly trained and skilled Shinobi. I was born to kill and to thrive in the shadows." I took a short break to see Leah's reaction. And not surprisingly she seemed a bit taken by it, this was a side of me she had never heard of.
But I continued.
"My upbringing was unsurprisingly filled with challenges. But the most difficult one was having a mother that did barely acknowledge your existence. Almost directly after I was born she returned to her job as head advisor to the leader of the tribe."
"What about your father?" Leah asked
"I never met him. all I know is that he was part of the Forest Guard." I replied and poured me some ale.
"How did you survive?"
"Well quite early on my aunt took me under her wing and raised and trained me. She also had an important role in the tribe, being the the leader of the shinobi of the tribes. So not much choice on where to go with my life. However it was not all doom and gloom. My aunt really treated me like her own daughter. So my training was hard but upbringing was still quite good."
"How come she took you in like that?" Leah asked as I took a sip of my ale.
"I don't know. But she was always very upset with my mother for treating me like that. But jumping forwards some years to when things really started to take of for me. I really excelled in my shinobi training with a focus on assassinations and infiltration. And that is also the reason I have such skill with multiple weapons. So with these skills my reputation grew relatively quick. However what did mean the most to me was not my reputation, but to get my mother to acknowledge me. So yeah you could really say I had mother issues, especially in my teen years."
"You started killing in your teens?!"
"Yes it's not uncommon for some to be even younger than what I was. As for the killing, for me back then I saw it more as a means to an end. Never took any pride in it nor did I see anything wrong with it either. What I did enjoy however was the thrill of the missions themselves. That a single misstep could mean a failure or even death."
I took a short pause with a sip of ale and started a new portion for my pipe.
"But if you were so good and had all that skill then why are you here in Eorzea?" Leah asked.
I looked at her as I lit my pipe. She looked obviously confused and seemed even a bit conflicted.
"Yes I am getting to why I no longer have any ties to that part of my life anymore in a while. You see as my reputation grew so did my influence within the tribe itself. And also the number of enemies. And the biggest one of them was none other than my own mother. You see my mother, even if she had the title of head advisor, she was the one running the show. The leader of the tribe was nothing more than a figurehead, a symbol. So when she sees me, someone she did not want anything to do with, gaining popularity and influence. She obviously started to work against me. But it was not so much difficulties before I had earned the name of Blackwolf. Wolf names carried a lot of weight in the tribe you see. And with so many starting to see me as the next successor to my aunt's position as the leader of the shinobi, my mother really wanted to get rid of me. And that she succeeded with. She managed to brand me a traitor. She did not make it obvious that she was behind the accusations nor that the trial was rigged of course."
"Your own mother branded you a traitor?!" Leah interrupted me.
I took a deep bloss from my pipe before continuing.
"Yes she did. At first I was to be executed, but I believe that my aunt made it so I was going to be exiled instead with no chance of redemption. And the sign of that is the tattoo I have on my upper right arm with a large scar over it. The tattoo was a symbol of being a member of the shinobi, and the scar symbolizes my exile with no chance of coming back."
"That scar looks really terrible and must really have hurt. I always wondered what it came from." Leah said.
"Yes that was the point. That the convicted was to feel every single cut." I replied finishing the ale I had left in the glass.

The silence filled the room only the sound of the fire in the fireplace could be heard, as I let what I said sink in for a bit.
"What happened afterwards?" Leah finally asked.
"Well the darkest part of my life." I started but paused as I felt a wave of emotions creeping.
"My whole life has been torn away from under my feet. I desperately tried to find new meaning. You could say I let the beast inside of me, that I had full control over, lose. I nearly lost myself." I took another pause. This is a darkness that I would rather forget.
"What made you keep yourself?" Leah asked looking worried at me.
"I can't say I'm free from it, even today. But it happened when I was on the brink of giving up. I was tired so I was defeated when I got into a fight with an old samurai master that was hunting evil. Right there and then I accepted my fate. I even blacked out of exhaustion. But when I woke up again I found myself in a tent. My wounds had all been treated. To this day I can't fully understand why he spared me. All he ever said was that he saw just a little bit of light left in my soul. And that made me worth redeeming. This small act of kindness and also people he introduced me to that were willing to look past what I had been and showing some act of forgiveness. That made me fight back the darkness that had taken me. I even started to train in the way of the sword under the old Samurai. He is also the reasons I came here to Eorzea. So I could train without being haunted by my past." I paused again as I poured me some more ale.
"I guess I will have to thank that old master of yours for sending you to me." Leah said with a teary smile.
She had obviously seen my reactions to telling all of this. And I could feel it myself. The wounds are not yet fully healed.
"Yeah. One day you might get the chance to thank him. Which I would also have to do now." I said.
"Oh?"
"For giving me a reason to fight." I said and looked straight into her eyes.
"Oh, come on! Don't make me blush like that." Leah replied and buried her face in her hands, and I just laughed.