wow
that was a pretty big hiatus don't ya think

Yeah; sorry for taking so long to update. I just kind of lost confidence in my writing and whatever I put down felt like shit, but I recently just worked up enough confidence to start writing again, and after doing a bit of practice, I'm pretty much ready to finish this!

To those of you who are just discovering this story, count yourselves lucky cause this was a pretty long hiatus.
And to those of you who started reading this back in 2018 and early 2019, I hope you can stick around with me to the end!

And don't worry about another hiatus, cause now that I've finally got my stuff together, there's nothing I want more than to finish this. I'm going back a regular once-a-week update schedule, though if I don't finish this before the end of summer, I might have to change that because I'll be starting high school this year.

Anyways, I hope you like this (very) late chapter!

Chapter XII

"Bakugou."

Kirishima's fist pounded on the door. In the silent hallway, it echoed and boomed like rolls of thunder in the heart of a storm.

"Bakugou."

Kirishima's voice came clear and harsh through the door, but Bakugou didn't say anything. Instead, he only scowled, looking back down at Kaminari's phone as if he hadn't heard. No. Now wasn't the time. He could deal with Kirishima and all that shit later, but right now he had to work all this out. He didn't have time to be interrupted right now.

"Bakugou. Bakugou, open the door."

"Tch." Bakugou scoffed at Kirishima, just loud enough for him to hear. He knew his classmate wouldn't leave any time soon, but he right now, he was just so irritated that he didn't want to take the time to take him seriously, and he wanted to make sure he knew that.

Kirishima, however, was not pleased. Instead, he only slammed his hand on the door again, this time much more forcefully.

"Bakugou, I'm not kidding. Open the damn door." The fact that he was trying to keep calm was obvious, but just as so was the fact that he was doing a terrible job of it. Bakugou could feel the anger and frustration seeping through his voice, so clear it was almost palpable. For some reason, that only irritated Bakugou even more.

"Fuck off." The words spat from his lips like venom, so sudden and harsh that Bakugou felt them lingering in the air long after they had been said. A brief silence dipped between the two of them, Bakugou's glare only deepening. He knew if he opened that door, the only thing that would happen was more arguing. Kirishima was too blind-sighted at the moment to actually take a second to step back and look at the big picture, and Bakugou didn't have time for that.

Before he could think out any alternative solutions, Kirishima pounded a fist on the door, so hard and forceful that Bakugou felt himself flinch for a moment at the sheer shock of it. The thought of him flinching at Shitty Hair made his face flush red with annoyance, but he didn't even have time to get mad about it before Kirishima's voice rang through the door again, this time much louder.

"Dammit Bakugou, I don't have time for this! Just open the fucking door, will you," he barked, his voice unexpectedly sharp.

It was so surprising that for a quick moment, it was Bakugou's turn to be stunned silent. He knew that Kirishima had a sort of fire inside of him; it was one of the whole reasons he liked him in the first place. He was just so used to him keeping it under wraps. Yeah, he was passionate about shit like fighting and "manliness" or whatever, but that was different. When it came to other stuff like arguments or stuff, he was usually the peacemaker or the diplomat, per se, as he was the one who tried to compromise with everyone and keep everyone happy. He was so used to Kirishima keeping calm in arguments that to hear him get so mad so suddenly was like a slap to the face, almost like when they had just fought outside a few moments ago.

Brows knitting together, Bakugou stole another glance back down at Kaminari's phone. The screen glinted with images stored in Kaminari's cloud, selfies and stuff that he had taken in class and with classmates. But oddly enough, the images were mingled with small snapshots of things like test scores and class rankings, and one photo that looked like it had been taken from under a desk of something Bakugou couldn't quite make out. Pictures of them training, pictures of a bunch of angles of the dorms, pictures of everything. There weren't even any pictures from before the school year started as if he had just appeared right before the enrollment to U.A.

And now, Bakugou couldn't even look at the photos without thinking about everything he had discovered earlier on. Were the smiles he was wearing in those photos just as fake as the look he wore back in his room against Bakugou? And if they were, what was that supposed to mean about this? All of this? The people in these photos were the same people that were hurt when Sero fell out that window, and the mounting evidence was beginning to suggest that Kaminari had a bigger role in that than he was letting on to have.

And that role was starting to have serious effects on people, including Kirishima. Just the thought that what Kaminari did could so easily bend and control how everyone felt around him made Bakugou angry for reasons he didn't understand. He didn't know why, but just thinking about it made his face heat up, his hands curling into fists. He wanted to settle this, one way or another.

Slamming the phone on his nightstand, Bakugou unlocked his door and swung it open with such force that it hit the wall with a loud bang. He and Kirishima were the same height, but at that moment Bakugou felt like a giant, unreachable and untouchable. His eyes blazed with rage, and his heart raced in his chest.

"There! I opened the damn door! Are you fucking happy now," Bakugou roared with such a passion that the words seemed to reverberate throughout his entire body. They rumbled in his chest, built up in his fists, pouring out every last bit of rage and frustration into that single sentence. It felt good. Really fucking good. It felt like he hadn't done anything like that in forever. Maybe he hadn't been talking a lot over the past few days, but this.

This was a satisfying, shaking cry of anger that shook his entire being down to this core, made him feel like whatever came out of his mouth would let anyone know what would happen if they crossed felt this good because he was mad.

He hadn't been able to realize it until now, but he was mad.

He was mad that no one listened to him or what he had to say. He was mad that there was so much going on that he didn't understand, and whatever was happening, he was being played. Everyone was being played, and he was the only one who actually had an idea that they were being played. He was mad because he felt so fucking helpless to do anything, and there wasn't a whole lot he could do about it. He was mad, and he let all that anger pour out into one sentence, leaving his eyes wild and his blood pumping.

When he finished, Kirishima was silent. He only looked up at Bakugou, his eyes narrowed. His hair was down, as it had been for the past several days, and while he said that he just wanted to try something different for a change, Bakugou had a feeling that he was too tired to be able to do it. His eyes were rimmed with red, dark bags under his eyes. It was obvious he was exhausted, but right now he was trying not to focus on that. He tried to open his mouth to speak, but Bakugou was there before he could get any words out.

"Dammit, Kirishima! What the HELL is your fucking problem? I don't give a shit about if you want me to open my fucking door! It's none of your damn business what I do because unless you actually want to sit down and look at the fucking facts, you can haul ass back to your own fucking room, and get your own damn nose out of my fucking business," Bakugou swore, his voice rising with each moment he spoke. His left hand was placed firmly on his door frame, his other one making wild gestures and jabbing Kirishima in the chest, partly for effect and partly to keep himself from blowing something apart with an explosion.

Kirishima stared at Bakugou for a long time after that, his crimson eyes narrowed together. Something deep inside him was churning, something Bakugou couldn't read, but something told him it was about to be let out.

A long, long silence passed between them. A silence where Bakugou stood there, sweat beading on his forehead and chest heaving with anger and exhaustion, his U.A blazer jacket crumpled around his shoulders.

"None...none of my business?" Kirishima finally said incredulously, looking at Bakugou as if he couldn't believe the words that had just fallen out of his mouth.

"Did...did you actually just say that? That this is none of my business? Bakugou, do you actually understand what it is that you did here?" Kirishima asked, pressing his hands together as if he were praying and pointing them at Bakugou.

In all honesty, Bakugou had half-expected Kirishima to keep yelling. To show his anger. Instead, when he spoke, his voice was dangerously low, so cold that for a moment, Bakugou felt chills go down his spine. For some reason, it still had just as much of, if not more of an effect than if he had just continued yelling at him.

Of course, he wasn't going to let him know that. Instead, he tried to keep his expression as stone-faced as it was before, his hands clenched together at his sides.

"Of course I fucking understand! I understand that I tried to talk to Kaminari to figure out what the fuck happened, but instead he fucking throws a tantrum and worms out of it while you all go and lose your shit over it like I'm the one who went and tried to fucking attack him!

"Do you see this? Do you fucking see this?" Bakugou exclaimed, holding up his hand so that Kirishima could see the burn where Kaminari had electrocuted him.

At this point, it was beginning to turn red, and the soothing effects of the cold water had long since worn off, leaving it burning with a vengeance. Of course, Bakugou had been electrocuted by his quirk before, but he had never actually been hurt by it. Like, really hurt. He didn't even know Kaminari could do that, and he wasn't sure what to think of it, now that he knew that he could.

Kirishima, however, didn't look phased by it. In fact, he looked even angrier than before, if possible. "Well of course he did! I'm not surprised! Bakugou, you have to understand that what you did wasn't okay."

Yanking his hand down, Bakugou stared daggers at Kirishima, feeling his blood boil as he fought the surge of furious adrenaline urging him to punch another hole in the wall. Was he actually listening to him right now?

"To hell with that! All you want to do is sit in a fucking corner and cry because Soy-Sauce face isn't here to crack dumbass shit, while I'm actually over here trying to fucking work shit out! This entire thing is absolute bullshit, and you're too wrapped up in your own shit to actually look at the big fucking picture here! Get your head out of your ass, Kirishima! This shit is real, not something you can pound into a fucking sack!"

"I've been trying to actually work this damn thing out because whether you want to admit it or not, Sero's 'accident' wasn't a fucking accident! Sparky up there had something to do with it, and I am this close to proving it! Damn it, just look at this!"

Before Kirishima could respond, Bakugou rushed back into his room, swiping Kaminari's phone off the nightstand and rushing back out. Already, millions of ideas were rushing through his head. He didn't care if Kaminari overheard them, or if the whole fucking world heard. He wanted Kirishima to know that the guy he had been trying to protect this whole time was the whole reason Sero was in the hospital, and he wanted to see the look on his face when he found out.

"Bakugou is that Kaminari's phone—" Kirishima began, his face morphing into an expression of disbelief, but before he could get anything else out, Bakugou shoved the phone into his face.

"Yes, it's his phone, dammit! Now shut up and look," Bakugou yelled, feeling his face flush red as a wave of adrenaline rushed through him at the prospect of finally proving himself right. To finally show Kirishima that this all as absolute bullshit, and to see him when he did realize it.

He was so caught up in the idea of being right that he almost didn't notice how Kaminari's phone wasn't opening. How instead of showcasing a picture of Kaminari, there was only a black screen. A single white Apple logo stared out at him, a progress bar moving at a slow pace below it.

"Look at what, Bakugou? What the hell are you doing?" Kirishima muttered, glaring as he shoved himself away from Bakugou.

Sneering, Bakugou turned his attention back to the phone, narrowing his eyes as if he didn't know what he was seeing. He watched the progress bar inch a little bit farther once. Then twice. And then it hit him.

A factory reset.

"DAMN IT!" He roared, and suddenly, his heart sped up as everything slowed down. A wave of adrenaline coursed through his body, led by rage. White-hot rage, flaring up in every muscle, every limb until it was all he could see.

He was so close. Dammit, he was so fucking close. And now everything was just being wiped. Like it didn't even happen. Like Kaminari was still some innocent idiot who did nothing wrong. But he did. He did, and Bakugou had the proof right here.

And something told him that the reset wasn't triggered by a glitch in the phone.

His vision flared red at the edges. His hand gripped the phone so tight he thought it would burst apart in his couldn't see anything else. All he could see was his own anger, building up inside him, screaming at him to do something. Anything.

And then the phone was on the floor, glass scattered everywhere as the screen went dark, before he could even think about what he was doing.

"BAKUGOU!" Kirishima exclaimed, leaping out of the way as glass exploded onto the floor with a sickening crack, sending shards skidding everywhere. "What the hell? Was that Kaminari's phone?"

"YES, it was Kaminari's phone, alright? But he did something—he fucking did something! There were things on his phone that he didn't want us to know, and you want to know why? Because he's hiding something, and I don't know what it is yet, but I am this close to finding it! Everyone in this damn school thinks he's innocent, but innocent people don't look up fucking neurotoxins and other psychotic bullshit! I told you, I told you that there was something messed up about this, and I found it, alright? And he knew that I found it, so he went and he wiped it and he...he fucking knows what he did and...gah, motherfuck!"

Bakugou couldn't take it anymore. It was too much. Kaminari, Kirishima, Sero, the phone, everyone thinking he was the bad guy, all of it. Pure, unbridled rage spit out of him, filling his chest, his lungs, blinding his vision. It was all he could see.

He hadn't gotten mad like this in a long time. But now he was, and he was pissed. He was pissed at how everything was happening, and before he could think, Bakugou was sprinting into his room, hands wrapping around the swivel chair at his desk.

He couldn't see. He couldn't think. All he could do was feel the rage clouding his head and the adrenaline pulsing in his arms, propelling his thrust forward. There was shattering, and then the chair was gone. Chucked through the sliding door in a fit of rage, and Bakugou watched as the chair sailed over the railing and down below, glass exploding onto the balcony.

"Bakugou!"

Kirishima's voice sliced through the air, so sharp and quick that Bakugou suddenly stopped. By the time he was done, Bakugou was out of breath, his face burning red. He hadn't been working out, but he could feel droplets of sweat beading on his forehead, his breath coming out in raspy gasps as though he had been running for hours. His arms dangled at his sides, left loose and tired from the sudden rush. And Bakugou only stood there, silent and panting.

The silence that followed was absolute. It only lasted a few seconds, but Bakugou could feel it filling the space between them like a thick fog, reaching it's icy fingers down his throat, filling his lungs until it seemed almost palpable.

In the silence, Kirishima stood there, staring at Bakugou. At first, he didn't say anything, but he didn't have to. He leaned down, picking up a piece of what used to be Kaminari's phone, then looked back up at Bakugou. His crimson eyes had narrowed to slits, his eyebrows cutting deep into his head.

"Are..are you serious right now?" He finally managed to get out, his voice as low as a whisper. Even so, it still somehow managed to echo all throughout the hall, as if he had yelled it from the treetops. When Bakugou didn't answer, Kirishima rose to his feet, taking a step closer and raising his voice.

"Bakugou, are you fucking serious right now?" His words rang out in the air, sharp and clear, slicing into Bakugou like a knife. He didn't know Kirishima as one to curse very often, so when he did, it came as a surprise. Still, he didn't want to show it. Bakugou knew where the conversation was going. He knew it was heading in a direction he didn't want it to go, but right then, at that moment, he didn't care. All he wanted to do was to be right. So he stood there, glaring holes into Kirishima's head, but before he could say anything, Kirishima cut him off.

"Look at this! Look at this, Bakugou! Don't tell me you don't see this shit!" Kirishima fumed, throwing his arm in a gesture at Bakugou's now-shattered glass door.

"This isn't a damn investigation. This is life, real life, that we're talking about here, and you're over here, rambling on about how Kaminari is psychotic and Sero falling out the window 'wasn't an accident' like all this is some conspiracy theory! It's. Not. These are people's lives that we're talking about here, and what I don't get is how you don't understand that! Kaminari is upset that Sero is in the hospital. He's not ready to talk about it. I told you that. Dammit, I told you that! And still, you go and act like a fucking maniac about it like I didn't say anything at all! Dammit, if you had just listened to me—"

"Listened to what?" Bakugou exclaimed, abruptly cutting Kirishima off. "Listened to how you can't hold your own shit together so you decide to go and be a fucking helicopter over everyone like they can't handle their own shit? If you could just stop being so fucking pathetic, then you might actually be able to look at this and—"

"WELL, WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?" Kirishima finally roared, the sheer emotion in his voice stunning Bakugou silent. He took a moment to look at him. Kirishima's entire body quivered, his voice shaking and trembling. When he yelled, it filled the hall, and Bakugou was certain that they could all hear him upstairs. Kirishima must have known that too, but it was obvious he didn't care. He was just focused on Bakugou, his eyes tearing up, his tough tearing down.

"WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO, BAKUGOU? TELL ME. Am I just supposed to roll over and LET all of this happen? Do you want me to just fucking go and keep watching movies and studying in class and doing whatever the hell I want like nothing happened? Because I can't, Bakugou! Something did happen, and I have to remind myself every time I sit down in class, because there's an empty seat next to me, reminding me what happened!"

At this point, Bakugou was pretty sure that Kirishima was talking more to himself than he was to him. He wasn't even looking at him anymore, but instead down at the floor, his trembling hands clasped into fists.

"I was there that night, and I couldn't do anything! Dammit, I still can't do anything! The last time something like this happened was when you were kidnapped, and that was different! That time, I could act to something! I know we were just supposed to wait, but I could still act!"

"Right now, all it is is waiting, and waiting, and waiting, and hoping things turn out right, and I hate it! I fucking hate it! I hate feeling so damn helpless! I was weak, and I couldn't stop it when I needed to, and now I can't do anything at all Is that what you wanted to hear, Bakugou?"

Bakugou wanted to say something. He really did. He wanted to get mad, to tell him that all of this could be avoided, to scream at him about he was being irrational, or stupid, or anything. But instead, nothing came out. It was as though bricks had filled his lungs, removing all the air and leaving him standing there as the blood slowly drained from his face, taking his anger with it.

Something hit him while Kirishima was talking. Somewhere, in his endless ramblings, while he finally poured himself out, an arrow had struck him. The gears in his brain started turning, replaying Kirishima's words in his head, over and over again, until finally, it started to make sense. I couldn't stop it when I needed to. I was weak.

It was as though someone had unlocked a door for Bakugou. There was something familiar about the way he said it. Something that started to ring a bell, but he couldn't quite grasp it.

And then it hit him.

The Kamino Ward. The fight with the League of Villains. Waiting for a train back to the dorms had suddenly seemed far, far less important as the screen in the middle of the city flashed with images of All Might in battle. Broken, bloody All Might, deflated and struggling for his life, his demise on display for the entire country.

But that was only part of it. Bakugou wouldn't admit it then, but now he knows. He knows all too well that that was only part of it, and from the second it happened, it began to rip him apart from the inside out.

Because knowing that he, the kid who idolized All Might, who always formed his dreams around the vision of the number one hero, who wanted to be just like him, had caused the end of the world's symbol of peace? It was too much. Too much for him to speak, to even think, and it ended up stuffed at the bottom of his gut, never to see the light of day.

But it was there. It was still there every moment of every day that followed, slowly tearing its claws through Bakugou with each passing moment.

Bakugou had tried his best to forget what that feeling was like, but now with Kirishima standing here, shaking and heaving in the hallway, eyes rimmed red and hair falling over his head, it all resurfaced at once.

He got it. At that moment, he got it. He got why Kirishima hadn't been able to bounce back from this as he had from the time Bakugou had been kidnapped.

Because this time, there was nothing he could do. And that was tearing him apart.

Instantly, Bakugou felt the anger he had been feeling only moments ago melt away just as quickly as it had erupted. His mind cleared, his breathing slowed, and all that was left was him, Bakugou Katsuki, standing in the middle of his room.

A long, long moment passed. Too long in Bakugou's opinion, and finally, his face screwed up as his muscles clenched.

"Tch," he muttered. "Dammit, Kirishima—"

He never got the chance to finish whatever it was he was going to say. Kirishima burst in mid-sentence, leering up at Bakugou with eyes blazing.

"No, Bakugou. I don't want to hear it. Whatever you're going to say, I don't want to hear it."

Bakugou had a reply to that. He had a million replies to that, and he could have gone on for hours like this, back and forth yelling until one of them finally caved. But before he could, there was a knock at the door.

The sound was sharp and abrupt, out of place in the sea of tension and words of daggers. Bakugou's eyebrows snapped together, and he peered over at the door, wondering who in the hell had the nerve to come to his door right now—

"Kacchan?"

Of.

Fucking.

Course.

Of fucking course, he would show up right now. Right now, of all times, of all times.

"Fuck off, Deku!" Bakugou barked, already feeling his hands curl up into fists. He didn't know what in the hell Deku wanted, but whatever it was, right now was not the fucking time. He was just about ready to chuck something else out his window.

However, Deku, only partially phased, continued through the door. "Come on, Kacchan! I needed to tell you that Mr. Aizawa wanted to see you in his office."

Dammit. In the heat of all this, of everything, Bakugou forgot that he had a fucking audience to watch what he had just done. An audience that was all on Kaminari's side, and now that he thought about it, he was certain that blasting a hole in the commons wall didn't help.

For a brief moment, Bakugou spared a single, flaming glance at Kirishima, but he couldn't meet his eyes. Instead, he turned away and looked at his shoes.

"I think you should go," Kirishima muttered.

With that, Kirishima stepped outside into the brightly lit hallway, leaving Bakugou alone in his dark room.

Midoriya hadn't been able to witness what happened, but he got there just in time to witness the aftermath.

It was chaos. Pure, unbridled, absolute chaos. No one really explained to him what happened, but when he saw the hole in the wall bearing black scorch marks similar to Bakugou's explosions and everyone crowding around Kaminari's room, he was able to get a pretty good idea.

Now, he stepped to the side as Kirishima stepped out of Bakugou's room, head down and eyes dark. Midoriya hadn't even known he was in there.

Just from the sight of it, it looked as though Kirishima had just stepped out of hurricane. His eyes were bloodshot the color of his hair, deep purple bags sagging underneath them. His shoulders hung down loosely, and as soon as he stepped out of Bakugou's room he let out a low groan, cupping his face in his hands and leaning against the wall.

"Hey, Kirishima!" Midoriya exclaimed, walking over to lean next to him on the wall. "You okay?"

Midoriya knew that Kirishima wasn't doing too well. He was pretty sure everyone in the class knew by now. It was a commonly known fact by now, and Midoriya had tried to approach him once or twice, but each time he was brushed off as though he never asked.

This time though, Kirishima didn't push him away. Instead, he sighed. It was a long, deep one, tired but holding much more than lack of sleep. Removing his hands from his face, he slumped down so that he was sitting on the floor, tilting his head up so that he was looking at the ceiling.

"Midoriya, you've known Bakugou since you were kids, right?"

It seemed like an odd question, so random that for just a moment, it caught Midoriya off guard.

"What? I-I mean, yeah I guess so," Midoriya replied, quickly getting over his initial shock. "We grew up in the same neighborhood and everything." Sighing, Midoriya slid down on the wall to sit down to sit beside Kirishima in the hallway.

"Do you know why he...does the stuff he does?" Kirishima mumbled, then must have realized how broad his statement was because as soon as the words slipped past his lips he scoffed. "Gah, I mean like...has he always been this stubborn and difficult? Cause like...I don't know, just..." Kirishima stammered and tripped over his words, before seeming to give up altogether.

However, it's enough for Midoriya to understand what he's trying to say. As his eyebrows furrowed together, Midoriya glanced at Bakugou's room, where he can hear scuffling and cursing coming from inside. Glancing back, Midoriya saw Kirishima, exhausted and flustered beside him on the wall with his bloodshot eyes and sagging eye bags.

What exactly went on in there?

Before he can reply, Bakugou emerged from his room, glaring hostility etched upon his face as he completely brushed past Kirishima and Midoriya.

Kirishima, however, takes no notice of Bakugou. "I mean, come on—you know what I mean! Talking all about how the thing with Sero wasn't an accident, calling Kaminari psychotic—it's crazy!"

There was a thin space before Midoriya replied. It was thin enough so that Kirishima didn't notice, but it was there, clear as day. A space where instead of agreeing with what Kirishima said, Midoriya watched Bakugou step into the elevator, shoulders hunched as the doors slid shut behind him.

And during that space, Midoriya thinks. He thinks of the excessive and exaggerated trembling and whimpering from Kaminari as everyone in the building comforted him. He thinks of all the holes in the investigation during the night that Sero fell, and how some of them still haven't added up even now.

He thinks about how strange everything about this whole situation seems to be.

Midoriya watched Bakugou storm off to the elevator with narrowed eyes.

"Yeah..." Midoriya finally muttered.

"Crazy."