Ablaze

by awalkerlifeforme

Aspen Antaeus has escaped the Hunger Games twice. She has become the face of the rebellion against the Capitol. But there is one thing stopping her from assuming her role as the Mockingjay. Her husband, Cato Hadley, was left in the arena to die. But when Aspen is given proof that he lives on, she joins the fight. And she will not stop. Not until every inch of the Capitol is ablaze.

11. Chapter 11

The scream began in my lower back and worked its way up through my body only to jam in my throat. Every inch of me wanted to let out the same piercing scream that Julie and Skye did. Dean had them around the waists, trying to drag them from the room, trying to get them away from the screens, but I wasn't watching them any longer. Instead I was still staring at the screen, trying to force the scream out. But I was Avox mute, choking on my grief.

Even if I could release the muscles in my neck, let the sound tear into space, would anyone have noticed it? Probably not. The room was in an uproar. The screams from the few people who were panicked from Cato's predicament were now joining the rest of the fray. Questions and demands rang out as they tried to decipher Cato's words. 'And you... in Thirteen... dead by morning!" Yet no one was asking about the messenger whose blood had been replaced by static.

There were a large number of people standing in front of me. Instantly I broke through the crowd to try and get to the screen. I wasn't sure what that was going to do, but I needed to be there. I needed to be... closer to him? Who knew? But I wanted to be as close to him as I could possibly be. There were a few hands grasping at me, trying to keep me away from the computer screens, but I merely threw a shoulder back into their head. I had a feeling that it was Brutus that I had just elbowed.

It was all in my desperation to get to the computers. To get to one of the screens. To see him. I arrived at one of the panels a few moments after elbowing Brutus, but I couldn't figure out how to work it. I couldn't get the screens to show me what was happening with Cato. Snow had clearly disabled the cameras in the Capitol the moment that Cato had issued his warning. There was no way that we were going to be able to get back his previous broadcast.

Barely five seconds passed that I was pressing buttons and turning dials on the monitor panels before there were hands on my shoulder. Just the way that Brutus had grabbed me before. But I still didn't move. Instead I found the button to play back the video of Cato's most recent interview over and over again. I could see the utter shock in his eyes right before the broadcast ended, right after he issued his warning. That crazed look in his eyes when he talked about Thirteen.

What the hell had they been doing to him? What was he talking about? Clearly I wasn't the only one who was wondering. Dean, Skye, Julie, and Damien were all trying to pull me away from the screen to save me from having to look at what was happening to Cato. I knew that there were more pressing matters at hand, like saving ourselves from what seemed to be an impending doom, but I couldn't. Cato was trying to warn us. But he was the one who seemed to be in the most danger.

A voice called the others to attention. "Shut up!" Every pair of eyes fell on Haymitch. "It's not some big mystery! The boy's telling us we're about to be attacked. Here. In Thirteen."

"How would he have that information?"

"Why should we trust him?"

"How do you know?"

It was the same way that they had all sounded when Cato had first called for a cease-fire. Haymitch gave a growl of frustration. "They're beating him bloody while we speak. What more do you need? Aspen, help me out here!"

"Yes, it was," Boggs said softly.

As angry as I was with Haymitch, as much as I didn't want to talk to him, I knew that we had to speak to each other right now. We were on the same side. Trying to save Cato. And I knew that it was the most important thing right now - to put aside any hatred that I had for Haymitch and ensure that my husband would be okay. All of that after I made sure that we were all going to be okay. I still had to give myself a shake to free my words.

"Haymitch's right. I don't know where Cato got the information. Or if it's true," I said slowly, having to admit the truth. "But he believes it is. And they're -"

My voice broke off painfully. The words lodged in my throat and instead a strangled noise came out. The same one that I had heard so many times before. The same one that I got every time that I spoke about what was happening with Cato. Even after being used to his deplorable condition in the Capitol, I still couldn't say aloud what Snow was doing to him. Dean's hand went to my back, gently steering me away from the computer that was replaying Cato's warning.

"How can we believe him?" Coin asked.

My head snapped to her. How couldn't they believe him? He had risked his own life to warn us. "Because no matter what's happening to him, his first thought is to always keep Aspen safe," Brutus said loudly, a snarling undertone to his words. "If he's saying something about an attack in Thirteen, it's because he believes it and is trying to ensure that she's safe."

"They're right," Dean said suddenly. "Cato's trying to save us."

"He's trying to save Aspen," Skye explained, placing a hand on my shoulder.

"You don't know him. We do. Get your people ready," Haymitch said to Coin.

He was right about that. As much as I wanted to kill Haymitch, he did know Cato. We did. Coin briefly looked to Brutus, who nodded his agreement. Coin nodded slowly and turned her back on us. The president didn't seem alarmed, only somewhat perplexed, by the whole turn in events. She mulled over the words, tapping one finger lightly on the rim of the control board in front of her. It plunged the room into a tense silence. When she spoke, she addressed Haymitch in an even voice.

"Of course, we have prepared for such a scenario. Although we have decades of support for the assumption that further direct attacks on Thirteen would be counterproductive to the Capitol's cause. Nuclear missiles would release radiation into the atmosphere, with incalculable environmental results. Even routine bombing could badly damage our military compound, which we know they hope to regain. And, of course, they invite a counter strike. It is conceivable that, given our current alliance with the rebels, those would be viewed as acceptable risks."

Her voice was so bland that someone would think that she was talking about afternoon tea. I had been in more interesting and thrilling conversations over bread with Katniss and Gale back in Thirteen before it had been destroyed. Her voice was so cold and calculating. Perhaps that was some of the reason that I really didn't trust her. Perhaps it was because she never seemed happy or nervous or angry. She always just seemed... complacent.

"You think so?" Haymitch asked.

His voice broke me out of my thoughts. I glanced over at him and narrowed my eyes. Coin had to have seen through it. She seemed to have a talent for reading people. It was mostly because Haymitch had been a shade too sincere, but the subtleties of irony were often wasted in Thirteen.

"I do. At any rate, we're overdue for a Level Five security drill. Let's proceed with the lock-down," Coin said.

Why weren't they talking about Cato though? "We have to get him out before they kill him," I said desperately, starting towards Coin.

"Don't worry, they're going to get him out," Katniss said, drawing me back to her. "They're not leaving him there."

"We have to get to him," I repeated.

We needed to get ourselves to safety, but we also had to save him. He could have already been dead. "We're going to, but we can't do that if we're dead. He gave us a warning. He gave you a warning," Damien said, wrapping an arm over my shoulder and pulling me along. "We have to take it. We'll get him afterwards."

"Come on, Aspen," Seneca said, grabbing me from Damien. "We have to get below."

"What are they doing to him?" I asked Seneca, knowing that if anyone would know what they were doing to Cato, it would be him.

"They're not going to kill him. They'll be more concerned with killing us right now. We need to go. Come on," Seneca said.

As we headed out of the room, I saw Coin standing over one of the monitors. "Is there anything in the air?" she asked, looking down over a man's shoulder.

"Nothing on Doppler, ma'am," the man responded.

"He was in the mansion, he could have overheard something," Coin said to Plutarch.

"Possibly," Plutarch muttered.

Coin mulled that over for a few seconds. "It's time for an air raid drill," she finally confirmed.

The Capitol seal was lighting up the room but it was quickly replaced with the strobe lights that echoed during an emergency air raid drill. The alarm was blaring through the entirety of Thirteen to warn everyone who hadn't just seen the warning. I quickly turned on my heels with Katniss behind me as the two of us darted out into one of the offshoots of the war room. Everyone was heading downstairs into the bunker as Katniss and I fell in line with them, moving down the spiraling staircase quickly.

"This is a code red alert. Please, remain calm and begin evacuation protocol," the air raid drill siren repeated.

Having not been able to make it too far from the war room yet, I could see Coin nodding at everyone else to leave. It would be mere minutes before all of Thirteen was downstairs in the bunker. I couldn't imagine it would have enough room for all of us, but apparently it would. There had been two low-level drills since I arrived in Thirteen. Neither one was serious and they were just drills. This was the real thing. It was the first that apparently almost everyone was experiencing.

The Capitol had had no reason to attack them until I arrived. I didn't remember much about the first drill. I was still in intensive care in the hospital. I was pretty sure that I hadn't even awoken from the concussion yet. I was pretty sure that the patients were exempted, as the complications of removing us for a practice drill outweighed the benefits. I was vaguely aware of a mechanical voice instructing people to congregate in yellow zones. That was about all that I could remember.

During the second air raid drill, a Level Two drill meant for minor crises - such as a temporary quarantine while citizens were tested for contagion during a flu outbreak - we were supposed to return to our living quarters. That was much less serious and the very reason that I hadn't seen the bunker that we were supposed to be heading into yet. During that drill, I'd stayed behind a pipe in the laundry room, ignored the pulsating beeps coming over the audio system, and watched a spider construct a web.

No one had even noticed that I wasn't around. Neither experience had prepared me for the wordless, eardrum-piercing, fear-inducing sirens that now permeated Thirteen. It was so loud that it would have been deafening, had I not already known what that felt like. There would be no disregarding this sound, which seemed designed to throw the whole population into a frenzy. I wouldn't have been surprised. But this was Thirteen and that didn't happen.

It was like they did one of these drills every day. I hesitated for a moment, unsure of where I was supposed to go, but it didn't matter. The others knew. Boggs guided Finnick, Katniss, and me out of Command, along the hall to a doorway, and onto a wide stairway. It didn't take me long to become completely overwhelmed. Where was everyone? Where were Cato's family? Where was mine? Streams of people were converging to form a river that flowed only downward. They looked almost like robots.

They weren't even the slightest bit panicked. No one shrieked or tried to push ahead. Even the children didn't resist as their parents led them along. We descended, flight after flight, speechless, because no word could be heard above the sound of the sirens. I looked for Ms. Everdeen and Prim, along with the Hadley's, but it was impossible to see anyone but those immediately around me. My family were both working in the hospital tonight, so there was no way they could miss the drill.

At least, I was pretty sure that was where they were. "Where's Prim?" I asked Katniss.

She looked as concerned as I felt. "She's in the hospital," Katniss called back.

"Finnick -" I started.

"They'll be down there," Finnick interrupted, already knowing what I was talking about. "Don't worry, Aspen. We have to keep moving."

"We'll go back and get her if we can't find her," Katniss whispered.

The two of us continued downwards, our feet pounding on the stairs as we continued downwards towards the bunker. My legs weren't the steadiest from what I had just seen with Cato, but I was still managing to remain slightly steady. It helped that I had Katniss for support. The two of us were right ahead of Boggs and Finnick. Seneca wasn't far ahead of us, trying to bring some of the Capitol refugees along with him. Of course they were some of the priorities. They knew their tricks, like this one.

"Are you okay?" I asked Katniss after we had descended a few stories.

"I'm fine," Katniss said, despite the fact that she was very obviously not fine. "Are you?"

"No," I said honestly.

Katniss laid her hand on my shoulder as we continued downwards. "It's going to be okay, Aspen. You're going to be okay. We all will be. We just have to keep moving," she muttered breathlessly.

"How far down is this?" I asked Boggs.

"Far enough to avoid a nuclear strike," he responded.

"Is that what it is?" I asked nervously.

"We'll find out afterwards," Boggs said.

He was a man that seldom showed any emotion. In fact, I was positive that I had never seen him show any emotion before. But there was something in his voice right now, maybe concern, which made me even more nervous than I was before. I knew Boggs' voice well enough to know that he meant that the only way we would know if the bombing was nuclear would be whether or not we were dead in the morning. We might have been able to survive a nuclear strike, but it would be harder than anything else.

My ears popped and my eyes felt even heavier the further down that we went and the more minutes that passed. We were coal-mine deep. I knew that Katniss and I were thinking the exact same thing. Would we die, suffocating on the poisonous air, the exact same way that her father had? I supposed that we would know in a matter of hours. The only plus of this entire thing was that the farther we retreated into the earth, the less shrill the sirens became.

It was as if they were meant to physically drive us away from the surface, which I supposed they were. Groups of people began to peel off into marked doorways and still Boggs directed us downward, until finally the stairs ended at the edge of an enormous cavern. I started to walk straight in and Boggs stopped me, showing me that I must wave my schedule in front of a scanner so that I was accounted for. No doubt the information was going to some computer somewhere to make sure no one had gone astray.

The place seemed unable to decide if it was natural or man-made. Certain areas of the walls were stone, while steel beams and concrete heavily reinforced others. Sleeping bunks were hewn right into the rock walls. It seemed that this had already been well-fortified by the earth, and Thirteen had simply made even better use of it. There was a kitchen, bathrooms, and a first-aid station. This place was designed for an extended stay. And this part seemed to be for the higher-up members.

White signs with letters or numbers were placed at intervals around the cavern. I assumed that they were where we were all supposed to be staying. As Boggs told Finnick, Katniss, and I to report to the area that matched our assigned quarters - in my case E for Compartment E - Plutarch strolled up. Finnick immediately walked off, looking very blank-faced. I assumed that in the wake of Cato's state, he was once more thinking about how Annie was doing.

"Ah, here you are," Plutarch said happily.

"You seem happy," I commented.

"What's to be upset about?" Plutarch asked confusedly.

"Would you like a list?"

My eyes narrowed to the point that I could hardly see anymore. It was proof that Plutarch was from the Capitol. No little issues of bumps. He was a big-picture kind of person. Recent events had had little effect on Plutarch's mood. He still had a happy glow from Beetee's success on the Airtime Assault. Eyes on the forest, not on the trees. Not on Cato's punishment or Thirteen's imminent blasting. It infuriated me.

Desperate to do something other than punching Plutarch, I merely rolled my eyes. That was all that I could do to not punch his lights out. I had meant one thing that I had said. Did he want a list of the many things that were bothering me right now? How long could that list even be? Probably an insanely long one. There were so many things that I was upset about these days that I wouldn't have even known where to start.

Even though I knew that it would be a better idea to stop thinking about everything that was upsetting me, I started thinking about those very things. I hated being in Thirteen. This entire place bothered me. It bugged me that I couldn't get a read on Coin. I didn't trust her, even though she was the person trying to help me. I hated what had happened to District 12. Gale was still stressing me out with his constant questioning of our status.

That wasn't even near everything. I was still reeling from Leah's death and Cinna's. Every moment from both trips to the Hunger Games still haunted me at all hours. Haymitch's lies were still constantly running around my head. He had lied to me about what he had once promised. The apparent secret that he was still hiding from me was scratching at the corners of my head. The stress of being the Mockingjay. More than anything, everything that had been happening with Cato.

"Aspen, obviously this is a bad moment for you, what with Cato's setback, but you need to be aware that others will be watching you," Plutarch said in a voice that he obviously thought was supposed to be comforting.

"What?" I asked.

One glance at Katniss told me that I wasn't just imagining what he had just told me. She was looking at him with a stare that told me that she was about to grab her bow from upstairs and shoot him herself. I was feeling much the same way. It never failed to amaze me at just how cruel the people from the Capitol could be. Despite that, I couldn't believe that he actually just downgraded Cato's dire circumstances to a setback.

"The other people in the bunker, they'll be taking their cue on how to react from you. If you're calm and brave, others will try to be as well. If you panic, it could spread like wildfire," Plutarch explained.

In my own way, I could understand what Plutarch was talking about. He knew that people tended to take cues from me. It was obvious enough, the way that my few actions had caused such a wave, but that didn't change the fact that it was completely insensitive. People were allowed to be panicked right now. I was allowed to be destroyed for this one moment. I had just seen my husband be beaten, potentially killed. So I just stared at him.

"Fire is catching, so to speak," Plutarch continued, as if I was being slow on the uptake.

"Why don't I just pretend I'm on camera, Plutarch?" I offered.

"Yes! Perfect. One is always much braver with an audience. Look at the courage Cato just displayed!" Plutarch hollered.

The courage that Cato just displayed... Was he kidding? Cato was trying to save my life - all of our lives - despite whatever it would cost him, which was clearly a lot. It might have even been his life. My voice lodged in my throat as about three hundred different insults came to mind. Katniss looked like she might have said something to him, but I grabbed her arm and pulled her back. There was no use fighting right now. It was also all that I could do not to slap him.

"I've got to get back to Coin before lock-down. You keep up the good work!" Plutarch said, and then headed off.

Katniss and I stared at each other for a good few seconds. She eventually merely scoffed and walked off, probably going to go somewhere that she could freely curse where no one would be listening. I also had a vague feeling that she might have been going back to looking for Prim and Ms. Everdeen. Right now I was so convinced that I was going to punch Plutarch's lights out. I was furious about the way that he and everyone else had been essentially ignoring Cato's condition.

"Watch it, Fire Girl," Brutus half-sung, walking up to where Katniss had been a few moments beforehand. "If you still want to save him, you're going to have to play with them. We stay here for now. When this is over, it'll be time to get him back."

There was something almost weak about the way that he was speaking. "Are you okay, Brutus?" I asked carefully.

He was looking at me like I'd lost my mind. "Are you kidding?"

"Cato told me how close the two of you were when he was growing up. I know that even when the two of you fought, you meant very much to him," I said, remembering the physical fight on the train between them after we won the first Games. They had seemed to go back to normal not long afterwards. "And I assume that it went both ways."

Brutus stared at me for a long few moments before placing a hand on my shoulder. "You're not half-bad, kid."

"Thanks."

Another brief silence passed. "Cato would be proud of you," Brutus said.

"He'd be proud of both of us."

Brutus's eyebrows popped up. "How's that?"

Chuckling humorlessly, I shook my head. "Here we are, having a civil conversation that hasn't been forced, and we haven't killed each other yet," I pointed out.

"He would think that he was imagining things," Brutus agreed.

The two of us might not ever be friendly, but when it came to Cato's well-being, we would always be able to put aside our arguments. "Think this'll be over soon?" I finally asked.

"I'm going to talk to Coin about everything. See how long it'll take for us to get back above ground," Brutus offered.

He headed off, but before he could get too far, I called him back. "Wait!" Brutus turned back curiously. "Cato's family... Are they all here?" I asked slowly.

Brutus glanced back and I held my breath. Prim and Ms. Everdeen were already missing. I couldn't handle the Hadley's being gone too. "That I can see, yeah," Brutus finally said. I let out a deep breath. "There's Damien and Alana. Carrie has Marley in her arms. Dean's helping pull everyone back down here to safety. Skye's helping Julie out over in first aid. Foot's bothering her."

But one was still missing. "Aidan?" I asked.

Brutus had clearly almost forgotten about him. His head whipped back and forth a few times before he glanced back at me. "I - I don't see him. Probably with his brother. Head over to your compartment," Brutus ordered.

"Okay," I muttered.

There was a sickened feeling seeping into my stomach. I needed to make sure that Cato's family was okay. While he wasn't here, it was my job to watch out for them. I had already failed Leah. I couldn't fail the rest of them. Right now I was fearing for Aidan much in the same way that I feared for Prim and Ms. Everdeen. In the back of my mind I was sure that they would all be here, perfectly fine, in the next few minutes, but it didn't stop me from getting nervous for them.

Trying to ignore those worries, I crossed to the big letter E that was posted on the wall. Our space consisted of a twelve-by-twelve-foot square of stone floor delineated by painted lines. Carved into the wall were two bunks - one of us would be sleeping on the floor - and a ground-level cube space for storage. There was a small cot that I assumed either Ms. Everdeen or Prim was meant to use. A piece of white paper, coated in clear plastic, read BUNKER PROTOCOL.

Maybe I should have been paying a little more attention to what we were supposed to do in the event of a bombing. I stared fixedly at the little black specks on the sheet. For a while, they were obscured by the residual blood droplets that I couldn't seem to wipe from my vision. Only a tiny bit of blood... But how much more had been spilled since then? Slowly, the words came into focus. The first section was entitled 'On Arrival.'

1. Make sure all members of your Compartment are accounted for.

There was one of the things that I was the most panicked about. Ms. Everdeen and Prim hadn't arrived, but I was one of the first people to reach the bunker. Both of them were probably helping to relocate hospital patients. That was what Katniss had said. She was still helping some of the children get settled. The Hadley's were all present, save one of them. Aidan was likely off helping Dean pull everyone else below ground and to their stations.

2. Go to the Supply Station and secure one pack for each member of your Compartment. Ready Your Living Area. Return pack(s).

The what? I scanned the cavern until I located the Supply Station, a deep room set off by a counter. People waited behind it, but there wasn't a lot of activity there yet. I walked over, gave our compartment letter, and requested four packs. A man checked a sheet, pulled the specified packs from shelving, and swung them up onto the counter. After sliding one on my back and getting a grip on the other three with my hands, I thanked him and turned to find a group rapidly forming behind me.

"Excuse me," I said as I carried my supplies through the others.

None of them said anything to me. Many of them looked incredibly terrified and very shaken, but they said nothing. They were trying to look brave. Parents for their children and children for their parents. Was the entire thing a matter of timing? Or was it possible that Plutarch was right? Were these people modeling their behavior on mine? It seemed that they were. Either way, it didn't excuse the way that Plutarch was acting right now.

Back at our space, I opened one of the packs to find a thin mattress, bedding, two sets of gray clothing, a toothbrush, a comb, and a flashlight. On examining the contents of the other packs, I found the only discernible difference was that they contained both gray and white outfits. The latter would be for Ms. Everdeen and Prim, in case they had medical duties. Katniss's pack was identical to mine. We would likely just have sit and wait out the attack.

Whether or not I would want to have something to do right now would be a different question. Hopefully I would be able to sleep through the attack, once it got here, that was. For a while I moved around and grabbed everything that I needed. Not that I had much with me. I hadn't thought to bring everything from our compartment... After I made up all of the beds, stored the clothes, and returned the backpacks, I had nothing to do but observe the last rule.

3. Await further instructions.

With nothing else to do, I sat cross-legged on the floor to await. A steady flow of people began to fill the room, claiming spaces and collecting supplies. It wouldn't take long until the place was filled up. Would everyone in District 13 even be able to fit down here? Was there a priority list? I wondered if Ms. Everdeen and Prim were going to stay the night at wherever the hospital patients had been taken. But, no, I didn't think so. They were on the list here.

A figure interrupted my panicked thoughts. "Aspen," Alana greeted, "how are you?"

"Waiting for my mother and Prim," I said honestly.

Alana nodded slowly, glancing up and looking around. "Katniss is here, isn't she?"

Nodding at her, I turned back and pointed to where I could see her dark hair whipping around. "She's helping the kids off on the other end of the bunker. I think that she's trying to keep her mind off of the fact that we don't know where the rest of our family is," I said.

"I'm sure that they're both alright. Just helping people."

"That's what we're hoping for." We sat in silence for a little while before I glanced up at my mother-in-law. "Alana?"

"Yes, dear?"

"Did you see Cato's most recent interview?" I asked cautiously.

A lump slid down her throat. "They told me about it. I didn't see it," she admitted weakly.

Maybe I shouldn't have said anything... Maybe I should have never met her son... I reached over and grabbed her hand. "I'm really sorry about everything. I'm sorry that he ended up there. I'm sorry that I didn't do enough to try and save him," I muttered weakly.

Alana gave me a broken smile. "Oh, Aspen, you need to stop thinking like that," she commented sharply. "You've done nothing to hurt him. In fact, you helped make him into the man that I always knew he could be. He's always been a good man. I knew that. But there was something about you that helped change him from a boy to a man. No matter what happens, I'll always be grateful that you entered his life and ours."

There was once a time that I had hated District 2. Everything that they did. The love that they had for the Hunger Games. The hatred and bias that they had for the other Districts. But it was times like this that I remembered that there were real people in District 2, just as there had been in Twelve. People like Alana, who loved her daughter-in-law, despite the fact that her son had gone to hell and back because of his wife's stupid actions.

"And as for the Games?" I asked carefully.

"You're asking this to a woman who has never genuinely enjoyed the Games. I've partook in them, like everyone else. But to end the Games once and for all, it's worth it," Alana answered.

"Even your son?"

Alana let out a soft breath. "Like I've said before, Aspen. My kids mean everything in the world to me. Those related to me in blood and through marriage. All the same to me. They're all my kids. I've gained a daughter because of this," Alana said, grasping my hands tightly. "And I haven't lost my son yet."

"No. You haven't lost your son and I haven't lost my husband," I agreed.

Alana's lips turned upwards. "I'm glad that you still think of him like that."

"Always," I said honestly. Even if he died, as much as it would break me, he would always be considered my husband. "Whether or not I've always made it known, he's everything that I ever wanted."

"You're everything that he needed... and more."

"Thank you, Alana."

"Any time, my dear."

She always had said the things that I needed to hear. Like telling me exactly what I had meant to Cato. What I still meant to him. He was the love of my life. I knew that we felt the same about each other. Alana and I sat in silence for a good while. We didn't need to say anything. There was nothing to say. These were the moments that we simply had to sit together and remember that we weren't alone. We never would be, no matter what happened.

Suddenly something dawned on me. "Can I ask you something?"

Alana turned to me and nodded. "Anything."

"Where is Aidan?"

Alana's head tilted to the side. "Aidan? My son?" she asked.

"Yes," I said. "I haven't -"

"He's not down here?" Alana interrupted, looking suddenly very panicked.

Instantly I wished that I hadn't said anything. She wasn't going to be able to calm down now. "Not that I've seen. But he's not the only one that I haven't been able to find. Prim and my mother aren't here yet either. They're probably still helping out in the hospital," I said as reassuringly as possible.

Alana slowly started shaking her head. "No. I spoke to Aidan just before the sirens went off." Alana hesitated for a moment. "I sent him... to the hospital," she mumbled.

"For what?" I asked.

"To make sure that the rest of the children were making it out safe."

"He'll be with Prim and my mother. He'll be fine."

The doubt was laced in both of our voices. A moment later, Dean leaned down in between the two of us. "What are we talking about?" he asked curiously.

"Aidan," Alana gasped, turning to her eldest son. "He's missing."

"What are you talking about?" Dean asked, furrowing his brows. "I was just with Aidan."

"When?" Alana asked.

"Just before we went down to the meeting. The two of us were talking about everything and then I left to get to the meeting on time," Dean explained.

"Where did he go?" Alana asked.

"I'm not sure. He said that he was going to go see what Prim was doing," Dean said.

That caught me by surprise. "Prim?" I asked.

At the same time that I asked, Carrie appeared on Dean's other side. "The two of them have gotten rather close lately. Feeling like they've both lost a sibling and now technically being relatives themselves," Carrie said. I twitched with guilt. She still felt like she had lost me... Aidan had lost Leah because of me. "He probably wanted to see if she was doing okay."

"Have you seen him since?" I asked.

Carrie shook her head. "No." I could hear Alana give a tiny whine. "He was on his way to the hospital the last time that I saw him."

"He'll be okay, Mom," Dean said, wrapping his arm over her shoulders. "You know Aidan. He's probably trying to make sure that everyone else is safe."

"Is the rest of the family okay?" I asked.

"They're all okay," Alana said.

"Marley?" I asked, realizing that the little girl was nowhere to be found.

Carrie gave a small smile and shook her head. "She's fine, I put her to bed a little while ago. I'm hoping that she'll sleep through the entire attack," Carrie said. I raised a brow, unsure of how she would possibly be able to sleep through a bombing. "Thirteen supplied the younger kids with earplugs. She's wearing those but I'd still rather her sleep through it all."

That was surprisingly thoughtful for people who didn't even seem to understand human emotion. "The doctors might bring some sleeping medication. You could always try that. Just the once, she should be okay. No nightmares or hallucinations," I said, sensing Carrie's concern for the medication. "I was just starting to get dependent on it."

"That's not a bad idea. You okay?" Carrie asked.

"I'll live," I answered honestly.

It looked like Carrie might have been ready to say something back to me, but a guard walked up between us. "Please return to your bunks to await further instructions," the man warned the Hadley's.

They all glanced at me. "Go on back. I'll see you all a little later," I said.

"It's going to be okay," Carrie said, grabbing my shoulder.

As she walked off, her husband kneeled down next to me. "We'll keep an eye out for Aidan and let you know when he gets here," he promised.

"Thank you," I said.

After a few seconds, Alana rose to her feet with me. "Try and get some sleep for a little while. No use dwelling on things that we can't change and it looks like we might be here for a little while," she pointed out.

"Yeah," I said numbly, "you guys get some sleep too."

"Take care," Alana said.

As we all moved back to our original spots, I shifted back a few steps and fall back onto the cot that was laid out. For a long while I just sat there and picked at my nails, which were already very chipped. I tried to remember all of the good things in my life for a simple distraction. But there weren't many. I was worried about Cato and now for the rest of my family and even for Aidan. There couldn't be any more dead Hadley children because of me.

A few minutes passed before Katniss fell onto the cot next to me. "Where have you been?" I asked, before she could open her mouth.

"Checking on the others," Katniss said, motioning flippantly to a number of other District 13 residents. "Keeps me from thinking about wherever Prim and Mom are."

She was just as worried, if not more, about them as I was. "You know that they'll be in the hospital trying to make sure that everyone is okay before heading down here," I said hopefully.

"That's true. Do - Do you think that they'll be here soon?" Katniss asked fearfully.

"They have to be," I said quickly, knowing that she needed to hear that. "They're not going to leave anyone up there."

"Should we -?"

"No," I interrupted, already well-aware of where she was going with her last comment. "I doubt that they're going to let us go up there. We're safe down here. They're not going to let us risk that."

"Are you okay?" Katniss asked.

"I'm alright. Prim and Mom will be fine. They'll be down here soon."

"I didn't mean them. I meant about Cato."

Of course she was asking about Cato. She was one of the few people who remembered that I still loved him. She was one of the few people who genuinely cared about him. At least, she cared about me and I cared about him. But was I even remotely okay? No. The only reason that I was managing to hold it together was because panicking right now would only make things worse. I needed to be calm right now. But after this was over, I was going to lose it. I needed them to bring Cato back.

"Of course I'm not okay," I said, a humorless laugh escaping me. "Did you see him?"

"I did," Katniss said softly.

"He looks terrible. It looks like he's about to collapse and die. They're treating him like dirt," I said brokenheartedly.

Katniss laid a hand on my shoulder and brought me into a tight hug. "He might not look good right now and he might not be good when he gets back here, but it's all going to be okay," Katniss promised. I nodded absentmindedly. "After this, I think that they might be going to get him."

Now that drew my attention. "Really?" I asked hopefully.

"Yes."

"Why's that?"

Katniss gave a small smile. "They're no fools. They know that you're hurting over his state. They know that you're going to stop working with them if they continue to ignore Cato's condition. Especially since they know that you've seen him this time around. They can't risk losing you," Katniss said. I nodded at her. She was right. I was not going to continue doing what they wanted without Cato here. "So they're going to go after him."

"A rescue mission," I breathed.

"I think so."

"I have to go and help him," I said suddenly.

If someone was going to save him, it had to be me. After all, I was the one who had landed him there in the first place. Katniss shook her head. "They won't let you go. Setting foot in the Capitol, where you're a wanted criminal, would be stupid," she pointed out.

"But I have to help him."

"And you will, the moment that Cato comes back. He's going to need help and you're the only person who will be able to do that."

"Thanks, Cat." I noticed that she was fidgeting slightly. "Are you okay?"

"Getting nervous."

"Me too. But it'll be okay."

"It will, Aspen. You have to keep reminding yourself of that."

She was right about that. I did have to keep reminding myself of that. Things would eventually be okay. I would get Cato back and the war would end. We would never have to deal with another Hunger Games again. Snow would be dead. There were plenty of things that we would never be able to fix - Leah, Cinna, and District 12 to name a few - but there were a number of things that would make all of this worth it. And eventually I would be able to have a real life.

Eventually things would be okay. Not today and not tomorrow, but we would be okay. All of us. There was nothing left to say after that. We merely waited together in silence with our hands tightly clasped around each other. I was just starting to get anxious, as Katniss clearly was, when Ms. Everdeen appeared. Katniss and I jumped to our feet and dashed over to her. I looked behind her into a sea of strangers. Prim was nowhere to be seen.

"Mom!" Katniss gasped.

"Where's Prim?" I asked.

"Isn't she here?" she replied.

My stomach churned in knots. Where the hell was she, if not with Ms. Everdeen? "No, she's not. We thought that she was with you," Katniss breathed nervously.

"She's not?" I asked, my voice shaking.

"She was supposed to come straight down from the hospital. She left ten minutes before I did. Where is she? Where could she have gone?" Ms. Everdeen asked quickly.

"Katniss... Where the hell did she go?" I asked.

If not the hospital with Ms. Everdeen, where would she have gone? People were still rushing in... She could have gotten caught up. But there was no way. She had to be doing something else. I squeezed my lids shut tight for a moment, to track her as I would prey on a hunt. See her react to the sirens, rush to help the patients, nod as they gestured for her to descend to the bunker, and then hesitate with her on the stairs. Torn for a moment. But why?

My eyes flew open at the same time as Katniss's. "The cat! She went back for him!"

"Oh, no," Ms. Everdeen gasped.

"No! Not the damned cat!" Katniss shouted, realizing it at the same moment.

"We have to get her!" I shouted.

So I moved before thinking any better of it. Katniss was on my heels within the second. "Katniss! Aspen!" Ms. Everdeen hissed, dashing after us. "Come back!"

We both knew that I was right. I knew it, Katniss knew it, and Ms. Everdeen knew it. We were pushing against the incoming tide, trying to get out of the bunker. She had to be towards the top of Thirteen. If she was still up there when the attack started, there was no way that she would ever survive it. It only made me move faster. Up ahead, I could see them preparing to shut the thick metal doors. In just a few minutes, as the voice was warning from outside of the bunker.

The guards were slowly rotating the metal wheels on either side inward. They were shutting the main door and leaving only the side doors open. Somehow I knew that once they had been sealed, nothing in the world would convince the soldiers to open them. Perhaps it would even be beyond their control. I was indiscriminately shoving people aside as I shouted for them to wait. The space between the doors shrank to a yard, a foot; there were only a few inches left when I jammed my hand through the crack.

"Open it! Let me out!" I cried.

"Open the damn doors!" Katniss shouted, coming up to my other side.

"The attack is beginning," a District 13 guard told us.

"I don't care!" I shouted.

Consternation showed on the soldiers' faces as they reversed the wheels a bit. Not enough to let me pass, but enough to avoid crushing my fingers. They were staring at me with wonder. I knew what they were weighing in their head. Giving the Mockingjay what she wanted and potentially endangering herself, or ignoring her request and potentially losing her obedience if something were to happen to Prim. Either way, I took the opportunity to wedge my shoulder into the opening.

"Prim!" I hollered up the stairs. Ms. Everdeen pleaded with the guards as I tried to wriggle my way out. "Prim!"

"Prim!" Katniss shouted.

"Prim! Call back to me!" I screamed desperately.

She had to be close. Then I heard it. The faint sound of footsteps on the stairs. "We're coming!" I heard her call.

"Hold the door!" That was Gale.

"They're coming!" I told the guards, and they slid the doors open about a foot.

"Prim, get over here!" Katniss yelled at her sister.

There was a brief silence and I heard her footsteps hesitating. What was she doing? Why wasn't she coming? "Buttercup!" Prim gasped suddenly.

Then there was a brief scuffle and I heard her footsteps fading. Katniss and I turned to each other, both of us as white as a sheet. "Oh my god, she hasn't gotten the cat yet. She's going back to the compartment," I breathed.

"We have to get her," Katniss said, tears filling her eyes.

"Aidan!" I shouted up the hallway. There was no response. "Is he here?"

"He was with Prim," Ms. Everdeen said.

"Damn it. Move!" I yelled to the guards.

Two of them jumped out of our way in surprise. They must not have thought that we would really do it. As I darted out into the hallway, Katniss right on my heels, I realized that a lot more people weren't down in the bunker than I had initially thought. It was actually a good thing that we had escaped. Not everyone was underground. Maybe they were planning on opening the doors again once everyone was downstairs. I supposed that it didn't matter.

It took us just under a minute to make a dead sprint up the stairs and towards the dining room. Maybe there was the tiniest chance that we could head her off before she got to our compartment. That was our one chance. We had to get her before she got upstairs. Together Katniss and I trampled people and threw them out of our way. They looked shocked but no one tried to stop us. Eventually we broke through into the completely abandoned dining room.

"Prim! Prim!" Katniss yelled as we ran in.

"Prim! Prim, where are you?" I shouted.

There was no answer. "Prim!" Katniss yelled, turning in a slow circle.

There was no sign of her. We hadn't made it in time. "Aidan! Aidan!" I tried. There was still no response. I wasn't sure if they could even hear me over the sirens. "Are you here? Aidan!"

The two of us stared at each other, horrified that we still couldn't find or hear them. "Proceed to your nearest stairwell and descend to level 40. Blast doors will be sealed in six minutes," the air raid drill repeated.

As in, we needed to be there in six minutes or we were dead. "We need to move. We don't have much time," I told Katniss.

"She sounded close before."

There was a good chance that she had been right there before realizing that she had forgotten the damn cat. "She was passing, coming back from the hospital. She must have been headed towards Compartment E," I said breathlessly. "Come on, let's see if we can cut her off."

"Aidan?" Katniss asked.

"Hopefully he's with her," I said.

Terrified that we might already be too late, Katniss and I turned and sprinted back out of the dining room. To our horror, we were completely blocked from heading back upstairs. Maybe there was a chance that Prim had been blocked, too. That meant that she would be back downstairs. Knowing that it was our only chance, Katniss and I followed the flow of people who were heading down to the bunker, frantically looking for Prim and Aidan.

"This is a code red alert," the air raid drill continued. "Please, remain calm and begin evacuation protocol. Proceed in an orderly fashion to your nearest stairwell and descend to level 40."

Katniss and I briefly stopped and glanced down the triangular staircase that went straight down to the bunker. Katniss and I stared at each other in horror. Everyone was moving in a steady stream, not hesitating or panicking. There was no way that we would be able to pick out Prim in the crowd. Everyone looked the same. We only hesitated for a moment longer before Katniss grabbed my arm and pulled me along with her again.

"This is a code red alert. Please, remain calm and begin evacuation protocol. Proceed in an orderly fashion to your nearest stairwell and descend to level 40. Blast doors will close in four minutes."

Just as the air raid drill warned us that there were a mere four minutes before the blast doors closed, there was a horrible lurch from the outside of Thirteen. Everyone was suddenly thrown off of their feet. I realized very quickly what was happening. Cato was right. The Capitol had been planning an attack and he had given us the warning that we needed. I prayed to everything that I could think of that Prim hadn't been upstairs during the first of the attacks.

"We're running out of time," I shouted to Katniss.

"Hurry up. Let's go," she called back, pulling me to my feet.

"Prim!" I screamed at the top of my lungs.

The moment that I was back on my feet, another blast came. This one was even heavier than the one before. I could only assume that the Capitol bombers were getting closer. To my horror, that time, the lights went out. They had damaged one of the electrical outlets. Even worse, they had fractured the shell of Thirteen. Water began pouring down the stairwell, quickly soaking through our jumpsuits. That was when the screams began.

I could hardly see Katniss. The only thing illuminating her was the strobe of the emergency lights. "What the hell is happening?" Katniss asked.

There was another bomb that threw everyone back to the ground. I waited a moment before slowly climbing back to my feet and grabbing Katniss's hand. "One of the blasts probably made a dent in the shell of Thirteen. Come on. We've only got four minutes to find Prim and Aidan!" I shouted back to her.

The two of us barely got a chance to get back to our feet before the real panic started. Knowing that they had a limited amount of time to avoid the blasts from the incoming bombs, the remainder of Thirteen was sent into a frenzy. They began screaming and shoving each other down the staircase. To my surprise, Katniss was thrown straight off of her feet and I followed, having been holding her hand. We both collapsed down a few stairs before landing painfully sprawled out.

People barely noticed us as they stomped over our practically useless bodies. My back, hips, and legs were throbbing from the impact, as was my head, considering the people kept kicking me as they passed. Katniss rolled slightly and I moved to the edge of the staircase, pressing my nose down into the riser and throwing my arms over the back of my neck, hoping that no one would kill me. A few seconds passed before someone grabbed at my arms.

"Come on," they said. "Come on."

It was an older woman who was trying to help Katniss and I get back to our feet. We both glanced up to see that the staircase was now almost completely empty. She helped us get ahead of her and continue to sprint down the staircase. For just a moment I had forgotten about Prim and Aidan. I had almost completely forgotten why we had left the bunker in the first place. Right now, I could only hope that they had managed to make their way back here already.

"Continue to the Supply Station and claim one pack for each member of your compartment. Please keep all personal items within your assigned area. Be courteous to your fellow citizens. This is a code red alert. All citizens should be inside the bunker. Blast doors will close in two minutes."

Down in the bunker once more, Katniss and I ran through the crowd, desperate to find where Prim and Aidan had gone. I hadn't seen them on the staircase but the way up to Compartment E had been blocked. Maybe they had been forced back downstairs before Katniss and I had left the dining room. Throwing people out of my way, I dashed through the crowd back to our assigned area, whispering over and over again that they had to be there now.

"Mom!" Katniss shouted.

"Where's Prim?" I asked, still not spotting her.

"Aspen!" Alana yelled, coming to my side.

"You didn't find her?" Ms. Everdeen asked.

"We were headed off. They closed the upstairs sleeping areas before we got there. We thought that she had turned back around. They're not here?" I asked desperately.

"She must still be on the stairs," Ms. Everdeen gasped.

"There's no one on the stairs," Katniss said.

Neither one of us bothering to say another word, we turned and sprinted out of the bunker again. I could hear the others following us, but I didn't care enough to turn back. They were safe. Katniss and I were in a dead panic, throwing people out of our way as we headed up the ramp and back out of the blast doors. While the guards were able to stop the rest of the Hadley family and Ms. Everdeen, they missed the two of us.

"Prim! Aidan!" I screamed desperately.

"Soldier Everdeen! Soldier Antaeus! We need to get you to the bunker!" one of the guards called after us.

"Come on!" Katniss yelled back to me.

"Hey, stop! Stop!" a guard shouted.

"Blast doors will close in one minute."

But it didn't stop either one of us. Even if it killed me, I had to find Prim and Aidan. I had to keep them safe. They were family. The two of us darted into the stairwell and glanced up for one moment. In the darkness, I couldn't see whether or not Prim or Aidan were there. The two of us rushed up the stairs, slipping and sliding on the now-soaked staircase. I was exhausted from the trips up and down the stairs, but I didn't dare stop. They had to be close.

"Blast doors will close in thirty seconds."

"Prim! Prim!" Katniss yelled.

"Prim! Aidan!" I screamed.

Had we somehow missed them? Were they down in the bunker? Were they already dead? Right then, a call sounded throughout the staircase. "Katniss! Aspen!" Prim shouted.

We both hesitated for just a moment to stare at each other. She was still alive. She was coming. We were going to be fine. I still couldn't see her as I glanced up the stairs. The emergency lights weren't enough for me to see through. Tears were flooding my vision as I searched for her. The moment that I was sure that we were back, safe and sound, in the bunker, I was going to kill her. Or maybe the cat, if she had even managed to grab him.

"Aspen!" Aidan's voice called.

"Aidan!" I shrieked in relief. "Prim!"

They were both alive. They were both going to make it. I glanced upwards again, covering my eyes with my hands, desperate to see any sign of either one of them. We didn't even have thirty seconds left. They weren't going to hold those doors. If we weren't down there, we were going to be killed from the bombs. At that same moment, I saw Prim and Aidan bounding down the stairs. Aidan had his arms around her, trying to practically drag her with her.

"This is a code red alert."

"Katniss!" Prim shouted again.

"Aspen!" Aidan called.

"Hurry up! Come on!" I screamed up to them.

"Blast doors will close in fifteen seconds."

We were almost out of time and still almost a floor up. I leaned down on my knees to see the two of them sprinting down the stairs, Prim just slightly slower. That was when I saw that they weren't alone. Someone else was with them, and it was Gale. He had risked his own life to save them... He hadn't even said anything to Katniss or me. He had merely gone after them. Once I was done wringing all of their necks for endangering themselves, I'd have to remember to kill him, too.

"Get down here! Hurry!" Katniss yelled.

"This is a code red alert."

"Come on!" Katniss barked.

"Blast doors will close in ten seconds."

"Move it!" I shouted.

Ten seconds... Was it even possible to make it to the blast doors in ten seconds? It had taken us almost thirty just to get here. But I had to believe that we would make it. Prim came bounding down the stairs with Buttercup tucked safely - albeit very wet - in her arms. Aidan was ushering her down as quickly as possible with Gale behind the two of them. He looked about ready to scoop them up and make a run for it for them.

"Nine... Eight..."

Very slowly Katniss and I backed down the staircase so that we were standing a single level above the landing, just about ten yards from the blast doors. We needed to be ready when it was time to run. I could see the guards turning the gears to the doors, about ready to seal them, whether or not we were on the inside. The doors came into my view as they slowly came closer and closer to locking us out. My heart was pounding as I wiped the rain out of my eyes.

"Come on!" Katniss called.

"Let's go!" I yelled.

"Seven... Six... Five..."

That was when I realized that they wouldn't make it. They were too far behind us and the guards couldn't see that we were coming. They likely couldn't hear us over the rush of water, air raid announcement, and constant sirens. So Katniss and I bounded down the stairs as fast as possible, desperate to ensure that we wouldn't be trapped. I could hear the pounding of the other three sets of feet behind us.

"Hold the doors!" Katniss yelled as we jumped three and four stairs at a time.

"We're coming! Wait!" I screamed as loudly as possible.

"Four... Three... Two..."

"Wait! Hold the doors!"

At that same moment, Katniss and I were the first through the doors. Prim, Aidan, and Gale were just behind us. "We're here! Wait!" I shouted.

"One."

As the air raid siren silenced itself, I glanced back to see that Gale had been forced to slip in through the doors sideways, very nearly getting his shoulder crushed as the doors closed behind us. Gale had an armload of baggage with him that I hadn't noticed before. I wasn't sure what it was, but it must have not been that important as he flung it off to the side. Katniss, Gale, Aidan, Prim, and I all slowed to a steady jog towards the downwards incline into the main area of the bunker.

All five of us finally stopped about halfway through. Behind us I could see guards and a number of other District 13 citizens coming out to see what the problem was. In the meantime, I could hear the doors close with a loud and final clank. Just a second later and we would have been trapped out there. Coin and the guards wouldn't have even stopped to ensure our safety. Just one of a great many things that had always sat poorly with me about her.

Katniss and I both advanced on Prim. "You went back for the cat?" Katniss howled.

"What were you thinking?" I shouted.

My voice cracked from how angry I was. It was already sore from all of the shouting that I had done, searching for them, but right now I was just glad that we had all made it back safely and relatively unharmed - Katniss and I would just be a little bruised and banged up from the tumble down the stairs. Despite being furious with her for her foolishness, I gave Prim an angry shake and then hugged her tighter than I ever had, squashing Buttercup between us.

Katniss and I didn't dare let up on her until I heard another voice. "Aidan!" Alana's scream echoed through the bunker.

Aidan bashfully stepped forward. "Mom -"

"What the hell are you thinking?" Alana snarled, looking very much like a fully-grown bear. She shook and hugged Aidan much in the same way that we had just done with Prim. "It was a drill! You could have been locked out there!"

"Mom, I'm sorry," Aidan apologized, pulling out of his mother's crushing grip. "Prim remembered her cat and I didn't want to let her go back to them alone. Thank you, Aspen."

Remembering that it hadn't just been Prim that I had been so desperate to save, I rushed over to Aidan and kneeled down to his level, bringing him into a bone-crushing hug. He was almost as tall as me, but right now it felt like he was a toddler. It reminded me that he was still just a kid. Aidan wrapped his arms around my thin waist. I could feel that he was shaking. Not from anger or exhaustion, but from fear. Even though what we had just gone through was terrifying, I had never felt closer to him.

When we finally pulled apart, I brushed Aidan's wet hair off of his forehead. "Whether or not you like me, Aidan, you're my brother. I'm not going to let anything happen. Are you okay?" I asked.

"I'm - I'm fine," Aidan stuttered.

Alana walked in between the two of us, pulling me into a tearful hug. "Thank you, Aspen," Alana sobbed.

"You're welcome," I said.

"Prim, are you okay?" Aidan asked.

Katniss's hands were still on her sister's shoulders. She looked like she was in between squeezing the life out of her with a hug or grabbing her bow to shoot her. Prim looked like she was about to faint. I walked over to her and grabbed her shoulder again, trying to keep Prim calm and calm Katniss down. This was the wrong place to fight about stupidity. Prim's explanation as to what she had done was already on her lips.

"Y - Yes. I couldn't leave him behind, Katniss. I wasn't gonna leave him," Prim cried, her voice cracking. "Not twice. You should have seen him pacing the room and howling. He'd come back to protect us."

"Okay. Okay," I said breathlessly.

It was from even more than the dash up and down the staircase as many times as we had. If I never saw those staircases again it would still be too soon. Trying to calm myself down, and Katniss, who still looked like she might lose it, I pushed my wet hair back from my forehead. Folding my arms over my chest and taking a few more breaths to calm myself, I stepped back and lifted Buttercup by the scruff of the neck. The cat instantly started crying.

"I should've drowned you when I had the chance," I growled.

"I'm still going to drown you," Katniss added.

Clearly Buttercup hadn't appreciated either one of our insults. His ears flattened and he raised a paw. Both Katniss and I hissed before he got a chance, which seemed to annoy him a little, since he considered hissing his own personal sound of contempt. It seemed that we were back to our classic routine of hating each other and constantly trying to abuse each other. In retaliation, Buttercup gave a helpless kitten mew that brought Prim immediately to his defense.

"Oh, Aspen, Katniss, don't tease him," Prim said, folding him back in her arms. "He's already so upset."

The two of us exchanged a look with each other. I was really going to skin the cat and offer him up for dinner one night. That was, if we and the rest of Thirteen were going to survive the attack. The idea that I had wounded the brute's tiny cat feelings just invited further taunting. But Prim was genuinely distressed for him. So instead, I visualized Buttercup's fur lining a pair of gloves, an image that had helped me deal with him over the years.

"Okay, sorry," Katniss mumbled.

"We're all sorry. Just... don't run off like that again. Either one of you," I snapped at both Aidan and Prim. Both gave me embarrassed nods. "Always make sure that someone is either with you or that they know where you are."

They were still just kids. "Okay," Aidan muttered.

"Okay," Prim agreed.

"Blast doors are now sealed."

Obviously... "Let's go," Katniss muttered.

We had nearly been crushed by the blast doors, did they really feel the need to announce it? We all glanced around at each other. Hopefully we had been the last people in District 13 to have to make it down to the bunker. That was when we started hearing it. The gentle rumbles of what were likely the weaker of the bombs that the Capitol was dropping. We both glanced up before I placed a hand behind Aidan's back, Katniss's on Prim's, leading the two of them away from the doors.

"We're under the big E on the wall. Better get him settled in before he loses it," I told Prim.

Prim hurried off, Katniss with her, likely to get a nice talking-to from Ms. Everdeen and I found myself face-to-face with Gale. I had almost forgotten that he was here with us. He was holding the box of medical supplies from our kitchen in Twelve. Site of our last conversation, kiss, fallout, whatever. My game bag was slung across his shoulder. At least he had thought to bring all of those things. That had been his thought, rather than getting himself to safety.

"If Cato's right, these didn't stand a chance," Gale said.

Cato. Blood like raindrops on the window. Like wet mud on boots. The two of us stared at each other for a long while, still firmly planted in our spots in the run down into the bunker. For a moment I thought about leaning forward and hugging him. Mostly because I was thrilled that he clearly still cared enough to check on us. Instead of giving Gale the hug that I so desperately wanted to, I merely stood and stared at him awkwardly.

"Thanks for... everything," I muttered dumbly.

The two of us stared at each other for a while longer. We really didn't have anything to say to each other right now. Nothing that we wanted to say out here, anyways. I didn't want to have to have the talk about our awkward kiss back in Twelve in front of a number of people who could hear. So instead I leaned forward and took our stuff. I wondered if Gale had also grabbed all of the things from Cato that were sitting up on the dresser.

"You're welcome," Gale said stiffly.

"Your family okay?" I asked, having not spotted the rest of the Hawthorne's in all of the panic.

"They're fine. Yours?"

"Now that Prim and Aidan are back, everyone's fine. Looks like we might not lose anyone in the attack."

"Yeah. It's good."

We said nothing for a little while. "What were you doing up in our rooms?" I finally asked.

"Just double-checking," he said.

"Thanks for that."

Gale gave a sharp nod. "We're in Forty-Seven if you need me."

After that he turned on his heels and walked away, not bothering to wait and see if I was going to follow him. And I didn't. I had a feeling that Gale really didn't want to see me right now. And I really didn't want to have to have another awkwardly forced conversation with him. Mostly because of our last very tense conversation. I had noticed that, since the visit and kiss in District 12, neither one of us had really been able to look the other in the eye. Eventually I wandered back to my own space.

Practically everyone withdrew to their spaces when the doors shut, so I got to cross to our new home with at least five hundred people watching me. I tried to appear extra calm to make up for my frantic crashing through the crowd and dash up the stairs. Like that was fooling anyone. So much for setting an example. Oh, who cared? They all thought that I was nuts anyway. One man, who I thought I had knocked to the floor, caught my eye and rubbed his elbow resentfully. I almost hissed at him, too.

Once I was sure that no one was going to commit me to the temporary hospital wing - as in, the mental ward - I went to check on everyone else. Katniss, Prim, and Ms. Everdeen were sitting on their bunks as I walked around our tiny area. I wasn't sure what I wanted to do, but I couldn't just sit still. Katniss was mostly sitting with Prim attached at her hip. I knew that she was furious with her younger sister after what she did with the cat. But they would be just fine.

Ms. Everdeen was also fine. In fact, she seemed to be one of the calmest people in the bunker. Came from being a nurse, I supposed. She had been in the hospital earlier to help everyone figure things out. They all looked just fine. The people who were taken out of the hospital were fine and most of them were resting now. There were only a few people with minor injuries from the mad dash to the bunker. They were all being taken care of by the rest of the nurses.

To my surprise, Cato's family were oddly demure. It was shocking, considering that they were normally loud and boisterous at any time. Maybe it was because they were all thinking about what was becoming of their brother and son. Or maybe it was their panic at almost losing Aidan. My stomach roiled with guilt again. They were stuck down here, hiding from the incoming attack, while Cato was suffering the consequences of trying to protect us.

The family were all trying to work to keep their minds off of what was happening to Cato. Carrie was mostly trying to keep Marley quiet and calm. Most of the kids were having a hard time with being this far underground. Alana and Damien were clearly just glad that Aidan was safe. Aidan himself was trying to ignore his mother, who kept making sure that he was okay. Dean was consistently twiddling his fingers. He, like many of the rest of us, clearly felt useless just sitting here.

After a while I realized that there was nothing else that I could do with them. They were all simply waiting for the attack to subside. So I headed off to check on Gale's family. He had told me that they were fine, but I had to see so for myself. They still seemed okay. They were trying to keep Posy calm during the attack. Her ears were apparently hurting her. Rory and Vick seemed alright, thankfully. Gale kept giving me a side-eye, but I was trying to look away.

We had been down in the bunker with the doors sealed for almost half an hour when I finally walked back over to my family. Prim had Buttercup installed on the lower bunk, draped in a blanket so that only his face poked out. That was how he liked to be when there was thunder, the one thing that actually frightened him. Ms. Everdeen put her box carefully in the cube. I crouched, my back supported by the wall, to check what Gale managed to rescue in my hunting bag.

The plant book, both Katniss and I's hunting jacket, her parents' wedding photo, the photo of my parents, and the personal contents of my drawer. My Mockingjay pin now lived with Cinna's outfit, but there was the gold locket, mine and Cato's wedding rings, and the silver parachute with the spile and Cato's pearl. I knotted the pearl into the corner of the parachute, buried it deep in the recesses of the bag, as if it was Cato's life and no one could take it away as long as I guarded it.

To my surprise, there were even the few things that Cato's family had given me. The picture of the two of us in the cave after the fire and his portrait of me from the afternoon on the rooftop garden before the Games. It surprised me that of the many things that Gale could have thought to grab, he had grabbed most of the things that would remind me of Cato. No matter what, Gale had always cared for my happiness, regardless of what it had meant for his own.

After almost an hour of being below-ground in the bunker, there was another change. The faint sound of the sirens cut off sharply. Everyone glanced up as Coin's voice came over the District audio system, thanking us all for an exemplary evacuation of the upper levels. She stressed that this was not a drill, as Cato Hadley, the District 2 Victor, had possibly made a televised reference to an attack on Thirteen tonight.

That was when the first real bomb hit. The first one that had hit right above Thirteen. Everyone was thrown onto their backs, kids crying and adults screaming. I scrambled back onto the bed with Katniss, Prim, and Ms. Everdeen - the four of us all crushed on the bed together, Buttercup in between us. There was an initial sense of impact followed by an explosion that resonated in my innermost parts, the lining of my intestines, the marrow of my bones, and the roots of my teeth.

With each impact of the bombs, the entire bunker would shake and the lights would flicker. Everyone would scream and close their eyes, praying that the ceiling wouldn't collapse down around us. I had an arm wrapped over Prim's shoulder, my hands painfully tight around Katniss's. We're all going to die. There was no way that the bunker could take these impacts. With each bomb dust was shaken from the roof of the bunker and people were tossed around.

My eyes slowly turned upward, expecting to see giant cracks race across the ceiling, massive chunks of stone raining down on us, but the bunker itself gave only a slight shudder. The lights went out and I experienced the disorientation of total darkness. Speechless human sounds - spontaneous shrieks, ragged breaths, baby whimpers, one musical bit of insane laughter - danced around in the charged air. My heart lodged itself in my throat.

Then there was a hum of a generator, and a dim wavering glow replaced the stark lighting that was the norm in Thirteen. It was closer to what we had in our homes in Twelve, when the candles and fires burned low on a winter's night. I was panting tiredly when I glanced up and saw that a crack was finally starting to form in the ceiling from the constant hail of bombs. Right above where our bunk was... I slipped back onto the bunk, trying to let my damp hair help calm down my burning forehead.

"You okay?" I asked Katniss over the screams of everyone else.

"Feel too trapped down here," Katniss breathed.

"Me too."

"How's everyone else?"

"They're fine. Just glad that we got a warning," I mumbled.

"Yeah."

To my surprise, there was one person who looked as calm as he always did. Seneca walked over and took a seat at the edge of the bed. "Aspen. Miss Everdeen," he greeted.

"Mr. Crane," Katniss said awkwardly.

She still hadn't gotten over everything. "Glad to see that you made it down here safe and sound," I said.

Seneca nodded blankly. I couldn't remember if he had come down here with us the first time. I was still too frazzled. "We all saw what you did earlier. Making the fools move to run and find your sister," Seneca told me.

"I couldn't leave her," I said quickly.

Seneca let out a puff of air, smiling at me. I raised a brow, unsure of what he was smiling about. "Exactly what makes you the perfect Mockingjay," Seneca said. I raised a brow, not understanding. "That very fact that you don't think before you act. We have so many planners and thinkers in this war. What we really need is someone who channels their emotions and acts on them. That's what we have in you."

Someone who channeled their emotions and acted on them... That was certainly what I did. That was half of the reason that we were all here in the first place. My ultimate attraction and love for Cato. My anger during the private training sessions. My reactions to Peeta and Rue's deaths. My words in Eleven during the Victory Tour. The arrow into the dome of the arena that had sent my life into a downwards spiral. All stupid actions that I hadn't thought through.

"What do you think that they're doing to Cato?" I asked suddenly.

Seneca seemed to debate for a moment whether or not to tell me what he really thought. "Likely punishing him for what happened in his interview," Seneca finally admitted honestly. "They won't be happy that he essentially sabotaged their well-planned attack. We would have had no idea about it if not for him. Not in time, at least."

"Will that help the case to get him out of the Capitol?" I asked.

"I believe so. It won't go unnoticed by Coin that Cato is the only reason that we were able to evacuate Thirteen."

That was what I had been hoping for. "But will she even care?"

Seneca gave me a gentle smile. "I'll force her to care," he said.

"Thank you," I said.

The two of us gave each other a brief smile. If there was one person that I genuinely believed would fight to bring Cato back - who actually had some weigh with Coin - it was Seneca. I was about to open my mouth to speak again when another bomb hit. Everyone screamed again as they were thrown onto their backs. I fell half on Seneca, who kept a hand on my arm until the lights had come back on. I could see Prim practically attached at the hip to Katniss and Ms. Everdeen.

"Are you alright?" I asked softly once the lights had flickered back on.

Seneca released me once we were sure that the attack had abated for now. "Not surprised by the attack in the slightest. It's just a good thing that we got the warning," Seneca said.

"At what cost?" I growled.

"A great cost," Seneca said, grabbing my hand. I turned to him slowly. "But not everything. He's going to live, Aspen. We'll have him back soon enough."

Soon was not soon enough. "Do you think they'd let me go on the rescue mission?" I asked slowly.

"Absolutely not," Seneca said immediately. "They'll never let you set foot outside of Thirteen. At least, not without going to a safer place or having an entourage of armed escorts."

"I landed him there. I want to be the one to get him back," I argued.

"They'll send highly trained individuals to get him back. There's no chance that they'll fail the mission when it comes time."

"Comes time..."

"We have to survive the attack and get out of here first." Would we be able to survive the attack? It seemed very unlikely right now. "How's Aidan?" Seneca asked, probably to distract me.

Glancing over towards the Hadley's, I noticed that Aidan was still being closely watched by his parents. "Probably being reamed by his mother, something that I'm sure will happen for the rest of his life, but he's okay. We got them both back here in time and that's what matters," I answered.

"We're all glad to see the two of them back," Seneca said.

"Thanks." The two of us sat together in silence for a little while, jumping and tensing up again every time one of the bombs dropped again. Almost ten minutes passed before Seneca made a move to get up. "What are you doing?" I asked curiously.

Seneca turned back and gave the slightest of smiles. I raised a brow. "Heading back to the lower control rooms soon. Making sure that the building can still sustain the attacks by the Capitol," Seneca explained. My stomach started churning in knots. Were we really in that much danger? "They're heavy explosives."

"Can we survive it?"

"Yes."

There was just the slightest hesitation in his voice. "Are you sure?" I asked carefully.

"We'll try our damnedest. It's not the bombs that we're worried about."

"So what are we worried about?"

"How much air we have down here," Seneca said. My eyes sprang open. I hadn't even bothered to think about whether or not we had air down here. "This isn't like the rest of District 13. Air isn't freely filtered through here. We're so far down that the air down here is on backup generators. The air will only last so long."

Everything that Seneca was saying made perfect sense. I hadn't even thought about whether or not we would actually need some air down here. I didn't think about the fact that we needed air. It begged the question of how long we could survive down here without the air filtration system constantly running. Would we even be warned when the air started to run out? Suffocating to death or being killed by falling bombs. Which one sounded a little more appealing?

"When do we run out?" I asked.

"Best not to think about it. Either way, you'll know when," Seneca breathed.

"I suppose that's true."

"I need to get back to the control station."

"Okay. Drop by whenever."

Seneca gave a somewhat awkward smile. The tense air of the previous conversation was still weighing on us. "The same goes to you. Especially if you need a change of scenery," Seneca offered.

"Thanks. See you later," I said.

The two of us grabbed each other's hands for a moment to give them a tight squeeze. We were all going to be able to make it through this. I genuinely believed that. As Seneca headed off towards the Control Center - where he was likely going to be able to have a conversation about what was happening above ground - I got off of the spare cot and headed back over to my family. I dropped down on the cot alongside Katniss, Prim, and Ms. Everdeen.

For a while we all simply sat in silence. Either listening to the bombs, fearfully pressing our heads into the other's shoulders, simply waiting for the bombs to stop dropping. Almost an hour had passed that we sat in silence when I reached for Prim in the twilight, clamping my hand on her leg, and pulling myself over to her. Katniss grabbed for my hand and I wrapped my own around her, pulling her into us. Prim's voice remained steady as she crooned to Buttercup.

"It's all right, baby, it's all right. We'll be okay down here."

Prim likely sounded more confident than everyone else put together. I could see Katniss glancing up to the cracks in the roof. To try and distract her from it, I grabbed her around the shoulder and pulled her against my own. After hesitating for a moment, she rested her forehead against my arm. Ms. Everdeen reached over our backs and wrapped her arms around us. I allowed myself to feel young for a moment and rested my head on her shoulder. Prim was leaning against my chest.

No one spoke for a long time. We all simply sat together and prayed that the bunker was strong enough to take the impacts, and continue to take them. There was a rather huge blast from a bomb that must have hit directly over us. Screams echoed all throughout the bunker as I unwittingly pressed my face into Ms. Everdeen's shoulder. Much like the way that a small child would run to a parent for help. Ms. Everdeen simply pressed her hand against the back of my head, like she had when I was young.

Once the bombs had abetted, I glanced up. "That was nothing like the bombs in Eight," I said.

"And those were bad enough," Katniss mumbled.

"Yeah, they were," I agreed.

"Probably a bunker missile," Prim said, keeping her voice soothing for the cat's sake.

"How do you know?" I asked curiously.

"We learned about them during the orientation for new citizens," Prim explained.

"Did we?" Katniss asked curiously.

Obviously she had paid about as much attention in classes as I had. "You were at Aspen's side in the hospital for orientation. I think you slept through the truncated one that they gave you and Gale afterwards. They're designed to penetrate deep in the ground before they go off. Because there's no point in bombing Thirteen on the surface anymore," Prim explained.

"Nuclear?" I asked, feeling a chill run through me.

"Not necessarily. Some just have a lot of explosives in them. But... it could be either kind, I guess," Prim said.

What had Seneca said? Could we survive a nuclear blast? Honestly? Probably not. "Did Seneca say that the bunker can survive the blasts?" Katniss asked curiously.

"It can survive the blasts just fine," I said as confidently as possible.

"Is there anything else that we need to worry about?" Prim asked.

Was there even an end to the list of everything that we needed to be worried about? I didn't think so. There was a large range of things that we needed to be concerned about. But the biggest problem right now was the chance that we might suffocate down here. Especially considering how long we might be down here. How long could the Capitol drop bombs on us? How much firepower did they have? How much air did we have? I couldn't burden the others with those worries.

So I said, "No, sweetie. We're going to be fine down here." I brushed the hair back off of Prim's forehead and planted a kiss there. "We just have to wait out the end of the blasts."

Katniss was giving me a scrutinizing look. She clearly didn't believe that there were no problems with us being down here. But she wanted to bother Prim with our real worries about as much as I did, so she, like me, said nothing. We merely sat together and continued to wait out the attack. The gloom made it hard to see the heavy metal doors at the end of the bunker. I wasn't sure why, but I found it very hard to look away from them. Which made no sense, considering how paranoid it made me.

Would they be any protection against a nuclear attack? And even if they were one hundred percent effective at sealing out the radiation, which was really unlikely, would we ever be able to leave this place? The thought of spending whatever remained of my life in this stone vault horrified me. I wanted to run madly for the door and demand to be released into whatever laid above. It was pointless. They would never let me out, and I might have risked starting some kind of stampede.

"We're so far down, I'm sure we're safe," Ms. Everdeen said wanly.

Her face was much paler than I had ever seen before. I reached back and grabbed her hand tightly. For a moment I allowed her to have her weakness. Mostly because I knew exactly what she was thinking. At least, I had a feeling. Was it possible that she was thinking of Mr. Everdeen's being blown to nothingness in the mines? I was. Was this how he was feeling right before he died? Scared... wondering whether or not he would make it through the explosions?

"It was a close call, though," Ms. Everdeen said. She was right. People were barely downstairs when the bombs started. "Thank goodness Cato had the wherewithal to warn us."

The wherewithal... A general term that somehow included everything that was needed for him to sound the alarm. The knowledge, the opportunity, and the courage. And there was also something else that I couldn't define. Cato seemed to have been waging a sort of battle in his mind, fighting to get the message out. Why? The ease with which he manipulated words was his greatest talent. Was his difficulty a result of his torture? Something more? Like madness?

It was enough to make me want to throw up. Was he going to be okay? What the hell were they possibly doing to him? I just had to imagine that it was because of the torture. Perhaps they had hit him so many times that he had some type of brain damage. I wasn't sure whether or not that would be the best case scenario. They could fix that in District 13. I had to believe that. But if it was something worse... What would worse be? Did I want to know?

"If it means protecting Aspen, he'll always do anything possible," Katniss said, her voice breaking me from my thoughts.

Katniss's words echoed in my head for a number of minutes. We simply sat in silence as her words consistently beat against my skull. She was right and that was the thought that pained me. They were all right. Everyone was right, every time that they said it. Cato was going to do anything possible to save me, as much as I wished that he wouldn't do that. But he had proven it time and time again. He would always give anything up for my safety. Even his own.

In fact, I was reasonably certain that he would rather die and leave me alone. In his own mind, it meant that I would finally be allowed to be happy with Gale. But that couldn't ever happen. I needed Cato. He was the one thing that I had never thought that I would need, but now I didn't know how to be without. We had been sitting lazily for nearly an hour when we got some new information. Coin's voice, perhaps a shade grimmer, filled the bunker, the volume level flickering with the lights.

"Apparently, Cato Hadley's information was sound and we owe him a great debt of gratitude. Sensors indicate the first missile was not nuclear, but very powerful. We expect more will follow. For the duration of the attack, citizens are to stay in their assigned areas unless otherwise notified."

We all jumped up into place the moment that she started speaking. I knew what everyone else was thinking. Maybe it meant that we were somehow going to survive the attack - given that we had gotten our warning. But I was thinking something much different. Did Coin's words mean that we were going to be any closer to breaking Cato out of the Capitol to bring him back to Thirteen? He had saved us. But I still couldn't be sure. After all, Coin didn't make any mention of it in her speech.

For much of the next few hours I only thought about Cato and the potential that we might have been ready to get him back. I couldn't stand the thought that we might not be getting him back, even after he had risked his life to save us. To save me. The only thing to break my thoughts of Cato was when a soldier alerted Ms. Everdeen that she was needed in the first-aid station. She was reluctant to leave us, even though she would only be thirty yards away.

"We'll be fine, really," I told her. "Do you think anything could get past him?"

We all glanced down as I pointed to Buttercup, who gave me such a halfhearted hiss, we all had to laugh a little. For the first time since seeing Cato's broadcast a few hours ago, I managed just the tiniest of smiles. Perhaps it was because, for just a moment, things felt right. Buttercup hissing at me because he hated me, and vice versa. Although the weakness in the hiss reminded me of the gravity of the situation. Even I felt a little sorry for him.

After Ms. Everdeen went, I suggested, "Why don't you climb in with him, Prim?"

"I know it's silly... but I'm afraid the bunk might collapse on us during the attack," she said.

"It's not silly," I promised.

Katniss instantly grabbed her sister's hands. Prim's words did have a slight effect on me. She had an almost good point. If the bunks collapsed, the whole bunker would have given way and buried us, but I decided that that kind of logic wouldn't actually be helpful. Instead, I cleaned out the storage cube and made Buttercup a bed inside. As much as I would have rather let the kitchen crew cook him in the stew. Then I pulled a mattress in front of it for Katniss, Prim, and me to share.

A long while passed before we began getting ready for the night. It had been midday when we had gotten Cato's warning. We were given clearance in small groups to use the bathroom and brush our teeth, although showering had been canceled for the day. I curled up with Katniss and Prim on the mattress, double layering the blankets because the cavern emitted a dank chill. Buttercup, miserable even with Prim's constant attention, huddled in the cube and exhaled cat breath in my face.

It was a long time that we all simply laid together. There really wasn't anything else for us to do. Only sit and pretend like there was nothing wrong. No bombs, no missing Cato; we just pretended that things were okay. For a while, I laid there with Prim and Katniss, watching Ms. Everdeen work in the corner. It felt nice to try and relax. Something that none of us got to do that often. But I was also still incredibly nervous. The bombs - although increasingly lessening - were still rattling everyone.

Eventually I got up and left. Not that I was supposed to, but I ignored the many people who were asking me to return to my spot. No one really wanted to fight with me anyways. Maybe it was because I was the Mockingjay. Maybe it was because no one wanted to upset me and see what happened if they did. Or maybe it was because this was the wrong place to be fighting with each other. We all had to stay calm down here. There was no use fighting a losing battle anyways.

Promising Katniss and Prim that I would be back in a little bit, I strolled over towards the Hadley family's compartment. They were practically overflowing. There wasn't enough room for all of them. They all seemed relatively calm, but they also looked petrified. Things like this never happened in Two. Nothing happened there. Not until me... I walked into the middle of their compartment and took a seat in between everyone, without a word. To my surprise, Aidan placed himself nearest me.

Perhaps the two of us were finally starting to learn to get along. There was a long period where we were all silent. There was nothing to say. I merely sat on the ground with my feet tucked underneath me as I picked at the threads of my jumpsuit. The silence wasn't as relaxing as it normally was. Right now it was tense, as everyone was still trying to get themselves settled in for the night. Trying not to panic themselves with Thirteen's condition.

"Sing something," Aidan said suddenly.

We all turned to him in surprise. "You want me to sing something?" I asked.

Aidan nodded slowly. "I think anything's better than the silence, waiting to see if the rest of the Thirteen made it through the attack," he whispered.

And he was right. Anything was better. Even a song, as almost inappropriate as it seemed. The longer that I looked at Aidan, the more that I realized something that should have been obvious. With Cato gone, Aidan had been forced to grow up. He - just like the rest of us - had seen far too much for someone his age. I guiltily shifted in my place, trying to break my train of thought, wondering what I could sing. What wouldn't offend anyone that was sitting near us?

Not 'The Hanging Tree.' Not right now. "What do you want to hear?" I asked Aidan.

Aidan thought about it for a while. "Have you ever written something?" he asked.

Writing music wasn't something that I regularly did. But there was something. "Kind of... When I was in the hospital they would try to get me to do something. To get me out of my drugged and catatonic state, I think. I wrote something. But it was more of a poem. A mishmash of thoughts," I said, realizing that it might have been very dumb.

"Sing it," Dean goaded.

What if it was ridiculous and didn't make sense? What if I upset Cato's family? I had written the song for Cato when I had first gotten here. A little mix of all of the feelings that I had been going through with Cato gone. It had never really meant to be put all together. It had really never been meant for anyone to hear it. It might have been something extremely stupid. I opened my mouth to start singing, but something distracted me.

Dean leaned away from us to reach backwards. He ducked down and grabbed something, pulling it out from underneath one of their beds. My brows arched when I realized what it was. I had seen a number of them before. It was a guitar. This one looked cheaper than most of the other ones that I had seen. There were some amazing players who would come to the Capitol parties. Most of the people who knew how to play in District 12 would strum simple chords. Dean picked it up and began to strum gently.

"You play?" I asked curiously.

Dean nodded. "Cato taught me," he said.

"I - I didn't know that he could play..." I muttered weakly.

Since when had Cato been able to play the guitar? He had never told me that. Was it something that he had always been able to do? "He was looking for something to do when the Games ended. He started to learn to play. He wanted to be able to play while you sang," Skye admitted.

Oh... It must have been something that he had been planning to surprise me with. It would have been a lovely surprise. We would have loved doing that together. It would have been a real moment for us to be a real couple. But maybe now it would never happen. A horrible guilt wracked through me. The same one that had so many times before. I took a deep breath and listened to the gentle strumming that Dean was playing, matching it to the poem that I had written in the best tune that I could.

"I cut you into pieces
Searching for your imperfections
I had plans to make you whole
But all my threads couldn't stop the bleeding
There's nothing left, but I'm not leaving
When all I know is you

"I've been looking for a way
To bring you back to life
And if I could find a way,
Then I would bring you back tonight
I'd make you look, I'd make you lie
I'd take the coldness from your eyes
But you told me, if you love me
Let it die

"Your eyes stare right through me
Ignoring my failed attempts to
Breathe back life into your veins
But I can't start your cold heart beating
You're so far gone, but I'm not leaving
When all I know is you

"I've been looking for a way
To bring you back to life
And if I could find a way,
Then I would bring you back tonight
I'd make you look, I'd make you lie
I'd take the coldness from your eyes
But you told me, if you love me
Let it die

"And you left me more dead
Than you'll ever know
When you left me alone

"I've been looking for a way
To bring you back to life
And if I could find a way,
Then I would bring you back tonight
I'd make you look, I'd make you lie
I'd take the coldness from your eyes
But you told me, if you love me
Let it die

"Let it die
Let it die
Let it die."

My voice dropped off at the end. It had begun to crack with the thought that maybe he was dead. Maybe he had already died. Maybe they had killed him the moment that the broadcast had ended. Dean's guitar eventually faded off as he stopped strumming. My voice was so soft that it would have been almost impossible to hear me, had the bunker not already been almost silent. I realized that everyone was listening to me, not even bothering to pretend that they weren't listening.

"You wrote that?" Carrie asked, finally breaking the silence.

"Most of it. Katniss helped out," I answered.

"It's pretty. Sad, but pretty," Carrie said.

"Thank you," I said blankly. "I'll pass along the message."

There was another lapse of conversation. Aidan eventually reached over and laid a hand on my knee. "I think that Cato would have really liked that one," Aidan whispered.

"Yeah?" I asked.

"Yeah," he confirmed.

It was enough to put a vague smile on my face. "Perhaps when Cato comes out to District 13 you'll be able to play it for him. One day he might even be able to play the guitar along to it," Alana said, forcing a smile on her face.

It was tight-lipped, telling me that she didn't want to smile. She, like me, was desperately concerned about Cato. "That sounds like a good idea," I said softly.

"How's the rest of your family, Aspen?" Damien asked, the only person who looked as normal as ever.

"They're fine. A little nervous, like everyone else, to see what's going to become of Thirteen, but they'll be fine," I answered.

"That's good to hear," Alana said.

"How's Prim?" Aidan asked.

There was a guilty tone in his voice. I smiled and brushed the hair back off of his forehead. "She's fine. Glad that she got Buttercup back. Thank you for going there with her and not leaving her alone. You were very brave," I said softly. Aidan gave me the slightest smile. "Foolish... but brave."

"A trait that Cato's always demonstrated," Dean said fondly.

"It's something that we all have in common," I said, laughing softly at the very true statement. We all did. I slowly rose to my feet and smiled at the family. "Hey, I'll be back in a little bit to check on you."

Alana waved me off. "Don't worry about us, Aspen. We can handle ourselves. Go enjoy some time with the rest of your family," she said, motioning towards Katniss and Prim.

"Thanks. Call out if you need me," I said.

Giving them all hugs and kisses, lingering around Aidan for a moment, I then headed back over to the bunks where the rest of my family was perched. As I walked back over, I could hear a few people humming the song that I was just singing. It almost made me smile. I was glad to distract people, if only for a moment. Once I was back at the bunks, I dropped down besides Prim and Katniss so that the three of us could talk. It was the first time that we had in a while.

Despite the disagreeable conditions, I was glad to have time with Prim and Katniss. Particularly Prim. My extreme preoccupation since I came here - no, since the first Games, really - had left little attention for her. I hadn't been watching over her the way I should, the way I used to. After all, it was Gale who checked our compartment, not me. Something to make up for. Katniss had always been a little different. She was older. It didn't feel like I needed to protect her quite as much as I did Prim.

As the night wore on, the three of us chitchatted about a number of different things. It was nice for us to get to talk to each other the way that we so rarely did. We were all always busy. Katniss with her preparations becoming a real soldier in Thirteen. Prim working at the hospital. Me as the Mockingjay. We didn't dare talk about the attack on Thirteen, the war, or Cato. I realized that I had never even bothered to ask Prim about how she was handling the shock of coming here.

"So, how are you liking Thirteen, Prim?" I offered suddenly.

"Right now?" Prim asked smartly. We all laughed. "I miss home badly sometimes. But then I remember there's nothing left to miss anymore."

"The memories," I put in.

"That's true, I suppose. I feel safer here. We don't have to worry about you. Well, not the same way," Prim said.

"You don't have to worry about me, Prim," I said, brushing her hair back.

Katniss smiled softly, doing the exact same thing to me. "We always will. We just worry about you differently now," she pointed out.

"Don't," I said sharply.

"We do," Prim answered.

Maybe they were always going to worry about me. I wished that they wouldn't. There were so many things to be worried about right now. I was the last person that the others needed to be worried about. There was no need. I could worry about myself. The two of them seemed to know that they had hit a nerve as they stopped speaking, merely settling for the three of us to hold hands. Prim paused for a while, and then a shy smile crossed her lips. I raised a brow curiously.

"I think they're going to train me to be a doctor," Prim said.

It was the first that I had heard of it. Not that I could be surprised. Prim was fantastic with everything medicinal. I remembered thinking it in the first Games. How wonderfully she would have done each time that I was injured. She would have been much better than I had managed myself. Of course she was going to become a doctor. She was just like her mother. Slowly I glanced over at Katniss. One look at her told me that she hadn't heard about it either.

"Well, of course, they are. They'd be stupid not to," Katniss said.

"Congratulations, Prim. You deserve it," I said truthfully.

She would be the best doctor in here. "They've been watching me when I help out in the hospital. I'm already taking the medic courses. It's just beginner's stuff. I know a lot of it from home. Still, there's plenty to learn," Prim told us.

"That's great," Katniss said.

"You'll be the best doctor in here," I said.

Without a doubt, Katniss and I were both telling the truth. She was going to be wonderful. She would make Ms. Everdeen look like an amateur, getting to be trained from this young. I laughed softly, starting to really think things out. Prim getting to be a doctor. She couldn't even dream of it in Twelve. Something small and quiet, like a match being struck, lit up the gloom inside me. That was the sort of future that a rebellion could bring. That would be worth it.

"Are you okay, Katniss?" Prim asked.

"I don't like it down here. It feels too confining," Katniss said.

"That's how I've felt since the moment that I arrived here," I said.

"It's not like District 12," Prim pointed out.

"No, but it's the place that we have to call home for now," I put in. "They've helped us a lot."

Katniss's brows quirked. "Kind of surprised to hear you admit that," she said.

Not long ago, I would have never said anything good about District 13. "I'm still furious with them, but they have helped," I said as honestly as possible. "They got most of us out of that arena. They've helped start the rebellion. They've kept it going."

"That's all you, Aspen," Prim said.

"Maybe... I couldn't have done it without their help though," I said slowly.

"And they couldn't have done it without you," Katniss added.

"Fair enough," I mumbled.

"What about you, Aspen?" Prim asked. I hummed softly at her. "How are you managing?" Her fingertip moved in short, gentle strokes between Buttercup's eyes. "And don't say you're fine."

That was what I had been saying since the very beginning. It was the same thing that I had told everyone over and over again. I was fine. Of course Prim was the person who could see through that. Just the way that Katniss had always been able to. It was true. Whatever the opposite of fine was, that was what I was. It was a long time since I had been fine. So I decided to go ahead and tell them about Cato, his deterioration on-screen, and how I thought that they must have been killing him at that very moment.

Buttercup had to rely on himself for a while, because now Prim turned her attention to me. Pulling me closer, brushing the hair back behind my ears with her fingers. I had stopped talking because there was really nothing left to say and there was this piercing sort of pain where my heart was. Maybe I was even having a heart attack, but it didn't seem worth mentioning. There was no need to make anyone worry about me any more than they already were.

"Aspen, I don't think President Snow will kill Cato," Prim said suddenly.

Despite everything, I smiled at her. It was always nice to hear what Prim had to say. She was always the person to tell me the right thing. Not necessarily the truth. Of course, she said that; it was what she thought would calm me. She was right. The off chance that Snow might not kill Cato was something that calmed me. But it wasn't the truth. We all knew that Snow would kill Cato whenever the moment was right. When it would inflict maximum damage. When I was watching.

"That's a sweet sentiment, Prim," I said.

Katniss threw her arms over my shoulders as a slight shudder ran through my entire body. Up my spine, over my limbs, into the very tips of my fingers and toes. It wasn't because I was cold. It was the thought of what Snow would do to me and to him. I simply spent the next few minutes trying to shake off the sudden chill. I had thought that we might sit in silence for the rest of the night, but Prim's next words came as a surprise.

"If he does, he won't have anyone left you want. He won't have any way to hurt you," Prim said.

Suddenly, I was reminded of another girl, one who had seen all the evil the Capitol had to offer. Johanna Mason, the Tribute from District 7, in the last arena. The one who had sacrificed herself for me, as much as she hated me. I had been trying to prevent her from going into the jungle where the Jabberjay's mimicked the voices of loved ones being tortured, but she brushed me off, saying, 'They can't hurt me. I'm not like the rest of you. There's no one left I love.'

At the time I had been shocked that she would dare say something like that. But now I understood exactly what it was that she meant. It was at that exact moment that I knew that Prim was right, that Snow couldn't afford to waste Cato's life, especially now, while the Mockingjay caused so much havoc. He had killed Cinna already. Destroyed my home. Cato's family was here. Leah was already gone. My family, Gale, Finnick, and even Haymitch were out of his reach. Cato was all he had left.

He had already destroyed so much. He had taken everything from me that was within his reach, with only one exception. He knew that if he killed Cato, he would have officially broken me. I knew that much. I knew that I would lose the will to fight if Cato was dead. He was the one that kept me fighting now. But that was even more useless than using me as a puppet, which was exactly the leverage that he had over me now. I had to watch my step to ensure that Cato still lived.

"So, what do you think they'll do to him?" I asked Prim carefully.

There was a brief silence where I wondered whether or not Prim would actually say anything. Would she try and protect me from what she really thought? That was exactly what I was thinking for a few seconds, until things changed. Because when Prim spoke, she sounded about a thousand years old.

"Whatever it takes to break you."

A/N: Just so you know, the song that Aspen sings is called 'Let it Die' by the band Starset. It seemed very appropriate for Aspen and Cato's relationship. Thanks so much for the follows and favorites! Please review! Until next time -A

Miss-Harry-Potter2123: That was definitely the point, to follow Mockingjay while having its own independent story. I'm really glad that you love the story! I've had so much fun writing it and I can't wait to get to Cato's return.