Disclaimers: As much as I may want to claim ownership of this famous series, I can't because both Harry Potter and Sekirei belongs to a whole lot of different companies that I can't remember the names of at the moment. Any characters that appear in this fic that is not a part of the original series, belong to me so don't take them without asking first.

Word Count: 550

Marriage Law Rejection Letters
Letter #58
Submitted By: Go0gleplex
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Dear Ministry of Magic,

Or should I address this to 'The Ministry of Walking Dead Men'? You see, I am already soul bonded to three beautiful, if not somewhat combative, women and the concept of divorce doesn't exist for them. Or rather, the only way out of a marriage in their culture is death, which means they have taken your demands to dissolve our bonded marriage rather personally.

My second wife, Karasuba by name, was particularly not amused by your attempts to force me back to Magical Britain, the country that you yourselves forced me out of in the first place, and has spent the past week sharpening her nodachi with a rather pleased grin on her face. Normally I would try to discourage her from engaging in her favorite sport of the wholesale slaughter of entire populations but in your case I think it is high time all you pureblood arses finally reap what you've sown. You thought Voldemort was someone to fear? Even he would be soiling himself facing Karasuba. Don't bother running. You can't escape and you'd just be encouraging her to kill even more people.

My other two wives, Haihane and Benitsubasa, are a bit more reasonable and only wish to severely maim and dismember you all, emphasis on the word dismember. They do not feel that people so monumentally stupid should be allowed to breed further much less run a government, magical or otherwise. Not that throwing yourselves on their mercy would do you any good at all since Karasuba scares even them silly and they would not dare cross her. They will at least try to limit the collateral casualties to just the brain dead idiots behind this farce of a law. Even our idiot boss is irked with you.

My advice at this point would be for you to make whatever funeral arrangements necessary, update your wills with the goblins, and apologize to the portraits of your ancestors for causing the complete extinction of your bloodline. Karasuba tends to be very thorough when killing someone that has pissed her off as completely as you wankers have. Since I have no intention of ever returning to the cesspool you call Magical Britain, my wife Haihane has promised to record Karasuba's playtime with you for my enjoyment later when they return home to Japan.

I hope your soon-to-be passing is not too painful and please, give Voldemort my regards when you meet him in hell.

With joyful anticipation,
Harry James Potter-Black
MBI Disciplinary Squad Coordinator

Author's Notes:
This latest Marriage Law Rejection Letter update was recently submitted to my review box by Go0gleplex. Thanks for the submission. If anyone else has any letters they want to submit, feel free to send them in. lol