It was a glorious day… Or maybe the weather had been glorious that entire week but it was only now that his mind was clear enough to notice it. In fact, Noah couldn't remember the last time he'd stood back to look at a day and really enjoyed it, but he was sure that whenever that day was, Luke had been there.

It was as though they had both been asleep to the rest of the world over the past months, waiting for this moment… when they'd wake each other up again.

They sat side by side on his couch, watching a movie, but not really paying attention, both wrapped up in their own thoughts. They should have been outside enjoying the day, but they were scared to pop the fragile bubble they'd built up around themselves over the course of the night. They were afraid to let the rest of the world in.

Noah toyed with an elastic band he'd picked up earlier and Luke shifted his hands on his lap. Every so often he would raise his head and catch Luke smiling softly, but also uncertainly at him. He returned each smile, just as apprehensively.

After waking up together on the floor of his apartment, they'd shifted around each other nervously. They were unsure of where to go next. They didn't know what to say. It was awkward.

Noah had spent a year in fear… terrified that he had lost Luke forever and wondering how he would go on with the hole in his heart. So now it was a different kind of fear. They both wanted to start again, that was clear, but they were terrified of making a mistake, of saying or doing the wrong thing.

After the movie Noah got up quickly and headed for the Kitchen. It was in avoidance, so that they didn't have to talk and bring up all the issues between them, issues that had broken them up before. But before he could reach the door Luke called, "Noah?"

He didn't turn to face him at first. He felt his back rise and fall as he took a few steady breaths, readying himself for Luke's words, whatever they might be.
When he turned to face him the worry in Luke's eyes broke his heart and he resolved to do whatever it took to strengthen the shattered trust between them. He would never hurt Luke again!

The man he adored, the man he loved so much, stood to approach him and Noah shifted uncertainly, his heart pounding in excited but anxious expectation. Luke stood as close as he dared and their bodies seem to sway towards each other, as though magnetised to do so. Their mouths were suddenly inches apart, their bodies moments from touching.

"I'm sorry." Luke whispered.

"I'm sorry too." Noah gazed into this eyes, trying hard to convey with gesture what he was unable to say in words, all the trapped emotion now spilling out of him.

Luke cupped the back of Noah's neck and drew his head forward, his eyes blazing with a certain tenderness, and when their lips met Noah was sure he felt their feet levitated off the floor.

Their kiss the night before had been hard, brutal and pained beyond belief. And they had shared a few soft and short pecks that morning when they woke up…

But this!

This was their first kiss. This kiss was one of unity. It was a kiss of greeting, of sorrow over parting, of love, of hope, and most of all of forgiveness. It was a promise and the beginning of the new them! They both felt it, that desire pulsing through them and the resolve each of them had that this time, this time they would succeed!

And Noah felt even surer of this when Luke's arms enveloped him, wrapped around him and Luke whispered his name in his ear.

...

Noah had been reviewing their past a lot since Luke's departure. The separation brought back so many memories and feelings, both good and bad.

"You okay?" Luke asked him at their next meeting, obviously seeing right through his facade.

"Sure." Noah was determined to present a strong front to Luke during their visits. He didn't want Luke to know how badly he was handling the whole forced separation thing.

But Nicholas brought that facade crumbling down when he innocently said, "Noah was crying."

The boy nodded conspiratorially at Luke. They sat in a row along a bench outside in the centre's exercise yard; with Luke between them.

Noah averted his eyes.

"You know?" commented Luke, "When I ask you how you are I'm kinda relying on you not to lie to me…"

"I'm not!"

Luke frowned at him.

"No Luke, really! I'm fine. He just caught me at a bad moment that's all. I'm allowed to have those from time to time, right? Cause if not then you're expecting a lot more of me than I can give, okay?"

Luke cocked worried eyes at him.

"Please don't worry." He shook his head, annoyed that he'd upset Luke.

"You sure?" Luke asked pushing at his hair as the wind blew a few locks across his eyes.

"Yes!"

By this point Nicholas had started kicking a ball about the yard.

"Cause if not then we should talk about it…"

"Why? So that we go around in circles and still come out at the same conclusion?" His voice was shaky and laced with a thin layer of anger. Regret clouded him when he saw Luke's reaction and he quickly back peddled taking his hand "I'm sorry. I just really hate this."

Over the course of their exchange Luke's eyes had slowly become glassy, "Well, since we're being honest, I'm not doing much better." Noah's eyes met his then. "I've tried to be brave about all this but I REALLY want to go home! I REALLY miss you."

"We REALLY want you home." He stroked the side of Luke's hand with his thumb.

"And I feel so guilty about that!"

"Guilty?" Noah asked, "Why?"

"Because, being in here, I realise just how lenient that judge was! There are guys in here who only get to see family once a month! If they're lucky!"

"Shit!" Noah exclaimed, barely able to imagine seeing Luke so seldom, "That's tough!"

They sat in a heartbreaking silence while they contemplated this and watched Nicholas as he played

"Despite everything," Noah suddenly said, "I am proud of you, you know? For the way you handled all this."

"I just wish there was more I could do to help make it easier for you babe." Luke whispered.

Noah smiled, "Your story helps. You got any more for me?"

"Yeah." He handed the latest folded update to Noah.

"It's really awful." Noah said then, "What happened to Kevin?"

"I know! Can you imagine it?"

"NO! That's one thing I don't ever what to imagine, thank you! It's bad enough thinking of you locked away in here!"

Luke stroked his face and then stared seriously into his eyes, "Listen, there's something I need you to do for me…"

"Anything… What is it?"

"Read that first. I've written some instructions at the end."

...

Draft Story by Luke Snyder

Draft Chapter Continued (unedited)

I can only imagine the thoughts that went through his head and the things he must have screamed; the pain and shock and fear he must have experienced in those seconds, but his trained instinct immediately took over. He pushed his sorrow for Samantha aside, he knew there was nothing he could do for her, and he dived for his daughter, lifting her desperately from the cold bath water and immediately starting CPR.

"When I took her out and I felt a pulse?" He shook his head, "The relief! But I swear that for a moment during that CPR, I thought I'd lost her. I stopped for a second and then she coughed and it all came up and I held her to me as she cried... I can still hear those cries sometimes." He wiped tears from his eyes. "And I often think, god! I just happened to be home early that day! Any later and she'd be gone too! And then I also think... a few minutes earlier... even if I hadn't stopped to collect the mail... I could have saved Sam too! Just so many 'what ifs', you know?"

"Yes." I replied. I knew all about those kinds of 'what ifs'.

I feel honoured and privileged that he told me such a personal and tragic story, but of course that wasn't the end of it.

"I was a mess. I missed Sam so damn much, I can't tell you! Even though those last few months had been difficult with her I never stopped loving her. I still love her. She wasn't in her right mind, you know? She didn't mean it."

I know. If anybody can understand about losing your mind it's me!"

Kevin nodded, seeing my point.

The death of his wife hit him hard. He blamed himself for not being able to provide properly for his family. He hated himself and then added to that was the pressure of single fatherhood. He was unemployed, already knee deep in debt, and he had to take out a loan to pay for the funeral.

Pretty soon the bank was threatening to repossess the apartment and he had images of them living homeless on the streets. But then, from out of the blue, he was thrown a temporary lifeline...

"One of my old customers, a rich guy from the Hills, asked me to complete some floor and window work for him and when I asked for payment up front he agreed. That meant I was able to keep hold of our home for another month."

"Where was Mia while you were working?" I asked, curiously.

"With my mom" She's our only relative. I never knew my dad and Sam was an orphan. A free spirit! She spent her life moving from foster home to foster home. She never settled anywhere until she met me."

It was while he was working on this house that he knocked over a wooden box on the mantle and inside there was a slip of paper with a code on it. He didn't think anything of it at the time, but Kevin had stumbled on the hidden combination to his customer's main security safe. Then one day, while working on the window from the outside, he spotted the man opening the safe and saw a large wad of cash inside. He was an honest man and the idea of taking the money didn't come to him right way. It was only a week or two later, after another terrible night with a hungry and miserable Mia and yet more bills in his mailbox that poor Kevin grew desperate enough to do it.

"And you got caught." It wasn't a question. It was obvious after all.

"It only took the cops two days to piece it all together. By then I had fled the state with Mia, but they still trekked me down. Let's face it! I'm no career criminal! I've never even had a speeding fine before! Besides, I regretted it pretty quickly once we were on the road. I just did it, you know? I never really thought it through. And I realised it was no life for a small child!"

"And your daughter? I asked, "She's with your mother now?"

"Yes she is, but..."

"But?"

"For the first few months she was sending me regular reports on Mia. So I knew how she was doing. I didn't want her to see me in here."

"I understand." I nodded. My partner and I had discussed the very same issue in regards to our son Nicholas, in the end deciding that the truth was best. But it was a different and personal thing for every inmate with kids.

"But I haven't heard a word from her for over a month and I'm just about going insane!"

"A month?" I asked, feeling my stomach clench for him. That was a long time with no news on the wellbeing of your child.

"I've tried to find her. I have no idea where she is."

"Have you asked your lawyer to try?"

"Yes. He checked out Mom's apartment but it's abandoned. It's like she just took off or something. I don't really want to involve anybody officially! I'm afraid they'll put her into care! Sam... she wouldn't have wanted that! Not after her upbringing! And my mom, she's not well. She had me late in life so she's elderly. If Mia goes into care she'll vanish! I've heard stories, you know?"

I nodded. I did know.

"I've got friends out there trying to find her but, so far... nothing!"

"Maybe I can help?" I offered.

He looked at me sceptically, "Luke, thank you and everything, but... I hate to break it to you... you're kind of in the same predicament as me!"

I smiled, "Yes I am! But Noah's not!"

"Who's Noah?"

"Well, to me he's the most fabulous person alive, but to you he's a complete stranger who can get to my Foundation. Maybe they can locate your daughter for you!"

"Really?" He looked at me so hopefully, "He'd do that?"

"If I asked him too, yes, I'm sure he would. Besides, he's a sucker for a happy ending!"

"That's amazing! If he would, I mean!"

Note to Noah: I know that after reading this you won't mind that I offered your help... Detail's of his mother, her address etc are below... Please ask the Foundation to track her down... (Love you bubby...)

...

Noah yawned and his eyes felt heavy as they waited together for Luke. He was totally wiped but there was no way he'd let that interfere with this precious visit with Luke.

"Four weeks!" he thought. One long month that had felt like a year and still another two to go! Gareth was trying to pin a time with a judge who would be willing to review Luke's case, but they had yet to hear any good news from him.

"Come on Luke!" Nicholas sighed loudly, kicking his feet back and forth under the chair he was seated on.

Noah stood by the table and smiled tiredly at him. The boy had been amazing over the past crazy week, despite all that had happened. It had certainly been a strange, eventful and challenging few days since their last visit with Luke. He guessed they would have a lot to talk about.

Then Noah felt himself getting nervous all of a sudden. He wasn't sure what Luke's reaction would be, but there hadn't been much of a choice and it was a decision Noah had to make quickly. It was the right decision, he knew that in his heart, but it was a pretty major thing to throw at Luke out of the blue like this and he just hoped Luke would understand.

"Nicky? Remember what we said, okay? You can't say anything to Luke until I talk to him."

"Yes." He moaned disappointed that he couldn't be the one to share the news, "Okay…"

As Luke arrived, his face shining with the joy he always held on seeing them, Nicholas ran for him and Luke kissed him a few times, chatting away merrily with him. Any worries Noah was harbouring evaporated instantly. Luke would be okay with it. Of course he would!

"Morning sweet." Luke smiled at him, leaning over to kiss him hello and then noticing for the first time the second child standing to Noah's right and holding tightly onto his hand. He frowned confused, "and who's this?"

Noah bent over to lift her up and she hid her petite face in his neck. He gently pushed her long straight auburn hair from her face and behind her pixie-like ear so that Luke could see her properly and said, "Luke, this is Mia. Mia, this is Luke."

Luke's coffee eyes instantly shot back up to lock with his and, after reading his thoughts, filled with a stark mixture of wonderment and tears.

...

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