"Your eyes are bwoken Noah?"

He felt the small hands gently run down his forehead and feather his eyelids. He shifted back into the couch to give Nicholas more room.

"Yes baby, they are."

"Why?" Mia asked from the other side of him, sitting in the crook of his arm and gripping his forefinger with her hand.

"I hurt my head and now I can't see baby." He kept breathing in short sharp shots to keep his emotions at bay. He didn't want them to be afraid for him. He didn't want them to see how scared he was.

"What's it mean?" Nicholas asked, confused.

"Well," said Noah, "Close your eyes."

There was a silence.

"Are they closed?" Noah asked and received an "Aha" from Nicholas and a "Yes" from Mia. "What do you see?"

"Nothing." Nicholas said.

"It's dark." agreed Mia.

"Well that's what it means. That's all I see even when my eyes are open."

He heard the little gasps from both of them.

"All the time?" whispered little Mia. Noah could hear the fearfulness in her voice.

"Yes baby."

"But… but how do you eat and get dressed and stuff?" Nicholas asked.

"I have to learn to do all that stuff without my eyes Nicky."

"But HOW can you?"

"Well maybe you guys can help me?"

"I will!" offered Mia.

"Thank you, sweetheart." He kissed the top of her head.

"But… but when can you see again?" asked Nicholas worriedly.

"We don't know. We have to wait to see if the doctor has fixed me or not."

"And then you can see?"

"We hope so, baby." His voice cracked. He would give anything to see their faces and the sudden thought that he might never do again hit him like a ten ton truck. Luckily Luke sensed his sudden mood and moved in to rescue him.

"Come on you two… Let's give Noah some rest, okay."

"Nooooo!" Nicholas moaned, not wanting to leave Noah's side.

"If we want Noah to be fixed then we must let him sleep, okay? Besides its lunch time… and I made lasagne!"

"YUM!" Score! If he ever needed Nicholas's attention he just needed to mention food. It worked every time! The child jumped down from the coach and headed straight for the kitchen, Mia on his heels.

"Thanks." Noah whispered and allowed the tears to fall. Luke leaned over the back of the couch to squeeze him from behind, kissing his cheek.

"LUKE! LUNCH!" Nicholas demanded from the kitchen.

They both laughed and Luke kissed him once more before leaving to feed the children.

...

"Luke?"

The bedroom was rich in smells of all kinds; sweet and spicy, aromatic, perfumed; and Noah could also make out a few essential oils; lavender, rose, cinnamon, sandalwood and saffron.

Noah frowned in confusion. Just a few minutes ago Luke had asked him if he needed help taking a shower and he'd declined. In fact he was amazed at how many things he could still do without his sight. It seemed to come back to him naturally, scaring him a little, but at the same time helping him, because at least he didn't have to feel like he was totally reliant on Luke for everything. So whenever Noah thought he could manage alone he would, hoping to give Luke a break; time when he could watch TV or work on his book or play with the kids.

Maddie and Jonathan had returned home to Bruce; and Holden and Lily were forced to take the kids back to Oakdale for school, so Noah was grateful that Casey and Alison had agreed to hang around. He wasn't sure how they would have coped alone with two young children and a teenager. The process of dealing with all the emotions that came with adapting to his blindness was a painful one in itself.

He'd left the bathroom expecting to find the room empty, but instead he immediately sensed Luke there.

"Luke?" he asked again, adjusting the towel around his waist so that it hung a little tighter.

He was confused when Luke didn't responded.

"What's going on?"

Suddenly he was aware of the body standing inches from his. He could hear his breathing and feel his breath reach his cheek.

"I thought I'd give you a sensory experience." Luke whispered.

Noah smiled, "Did you order in an entire Asian Spice Market?"

Luke snorted and Noah could hear him struggling to hold back his laughter, "Not the WHOLE market… maybe just one or two things…"

"Aha, and what does this experience entail?"

"Well… first you need to open your mouth."

Noah frowned in suspicion, "What for?"

"Don't you trust me?"

Noah cleared his throat in jest.

"Ah come on! Humour me…"

"Where's everyone else?"

"Josh is at school, Alison has taken Nicholas to the beach and Casey has taken Mia to visit with Kevin."

"Oh right. It's Thursday."

"Yip… now do as you're told and open your mouth…"

Noah did and felt a freezing cold spoon enter through his lips. He closed them over an icy ball of strawberry ice-cream, his favourite.

"Yum." He said.

"You see! Not bad, right?"

He drew breath as Luke's hand stroked down his right arm on his way to a corner of the room. He heard him rooting around.

"Luke?"

"Just stay right there…"

He heard the click of the play button and the sounds of a rainforest came on; all waterfalls and birds and wind in the leaves. Very peaceful and calming… He closed his eyes for a second and allowed himself to float there in his head, while all the different smells in the room started making him feel giddy.

Finally he felt Luke's hand, cold, presumably from the ice-cream, smooth down his back as he made his way to stand before Noah once more.

"Okay," he whispered, "now try this one..."

Noah immediately opened his mouth expecting to eat something else but Luke said. "Wait."

His mouth closed.

"First… smell…"

He breathed in deeply through his nose and was rewarded with the rich cocoa aroma of dark chocolate with a hint of cherry. He eagerly parted his lips to receive the treat he knew Luke held in his fingers, but instead Luke's lips met his and the chocolate and cherry mixture poured into Noah's mouth along with that distinctive taste of Luke. The combination instantly sent a very urgent and distinct message to his crotch and he expelled a deep whimper, especially as Luke's hands came up to press into his chest and then curl around his neck.

He gripped Luke's elbows as they kissed and then quickly and unexpectedly, Luke stepped back from him.

"Sorry." He said, sounding uncertain, "When I did this I wasn't trying too… You just looked so… I didn't mean we had too…"

"Luke?"

"Yeah?"

"Shut up and get back over here!"

He heard Luke smile. He wasn't sure how that was possible but he did. Luke's arms were quickly back around him and the next kiss was heartfelt, but then he broke away again.

"Hey?" Noah complained.

"Just wait a sec…" He sounded like he'd had an eureka moment.

There was a shuffling coming from around the closet area and when Luke returned he placed a strip of fabric in Noah's hands. Noah felt up and down the length of it and immediately recognised it to be a tie.

"I want you to blindfold me…"

Noah felt goose bumps forming. "Are you sure?"

"I want to feel what you're feeling…"

It was incredible how fine tuned the tone of Luke's voice was now that his sense of hearing was heightened… Noah could hear every sound from him, half breathless, half chocked between laughter and passion. He felt up his arms, along the smooth hard curve of his shoulders, finding his neck and looping the tie around his head, feeling gently up his face to position the fabric with Luke's help and securing the tie on the side of his head.

Luke took his hands in his and began to move backwards, drawing Noah with him towards the dresser where Noah suspected he had placed all his sensory items. One of Luke's hands left his and Noah felt the other pat up his body, searching for his chin to find the position of his mouth so that the other hand could return to tease a slice of melon between his lips; which Luke followed with his tongue. Luke was gentle as he touched and explored him, his mouth on a nipple, in his ear, on his neck. Noah felt in him that sudden and amazing surge of power and he lost all sense of time.

And so it began…

There were deep seated and secret aromas he'd never noticed when they'd made love before, but with the blindness these were heightened and left him begging, craving more. After a thousand and one different taste kisses laced with vanilla ice-cream, chocolate mouse, toffee, Noah licked the last of the velvet sugar off his lover's lips, his heart skipping a beat at every touch and knees weakening on each flick of Luke's tongue to his.

Instead of fearing the darkness, they were losing themselves in it, using it to experience a different kind of sexual encounter and growing more and more excited by it, reaching a new level of enlightenment. Noah sensed Luke's grace and his beauty by listening to his gentle moans, and drowning in his addictive vapour and feeling him, every bump and curve and angle, tight and wanton against him. Using his hands to see; sliding his palms flat against Luke's chest and belly, around his waste, cupping his buttocks, drawing them down over the bulge of his thigh to the back of his knee's and smelling him out, until smell changed to taste which he licked greedily off the tip of Luke's manhood. Luke's groans filled his ear drums and spurred him on, and Noah felt him twitch and throb in the depths of his mouth. His hitching breath sounding so much louder than ever before…

And these were just the sensations Noah was experiencing in the giving, what he was receiving in return was driving his brain into a mental state of pure euphoria… Never knowing where Luke's hands or lips would next fall and exploding in rippling shivers each time Luke's fingers grasped, tickled, smoothed his skin, cupped him, squeezed, rubbed, pulled at him; physically shaking and releasing a guttural moan as Luke's wet tongue explored inside of him.

Later, as the spasms slowly died away, Luke lay half turned to him, sticky with flavours they'd licked off each other, wordless, comforting; hearts thumping the same rhythm. Noah pressed his nakedness against him, burying into his hair. He clung to him and he wept into their love and it felt good.

...

Noah slammed the breadbin open, grabbed the bread, threw it down on the counter top and slammed the breadbin closed again. He had no real reason to be annoyed by it, he knew that. It was such a little thing and done for all the right reasons, but he hated it just the same.

Luke was attending a meeting to finalise the last aspect of the Grimaldi Shipping sale and so it was left to Noah to make lunch for himself and the kids. When he entered the kitchen it became quickly clear that Luke had placed everything he would need to make lunch on the kitchen counter, within easy access.

"Dammit Luke!" he huffed.

He paused and took a deep breath and resolved to calm down about it. It was done out of love and concern and he would just have to talk to Luke about it; so that he didn't do the same thing the next time. And there would be a next time, wouldn't there? And another, and another… It had been a week since his operation and, except for those occasional lines across his eyes; sight remained an elusive thing…

"This is forever isn't it?" a tiny voice kept uttering in his brain.

He sighed and pulled the plate Luke had left closer towards him, felt around for where he'd dumped the bread and removed two slices, placing them on the plate. It was as he made a move to find the butter that he swung too quickly and knocked something off the counter. It sounded like glass and it definitely broke as it hit the floor.

"FUCK!" he yelled in frustration and then felt like kicking himself when he remembered the kids watching a DVD in the lounge next door. He rubbed his face with both his hands and felt his way along the countertop to the sink, opening the cupboard under it to find the dustpan and brush. He squatted down and carefully felt around the floor until his fingers found the squidgy mess and broken glass. He started to locate the larger shards first, dumping them in the pan, he continued this slow progress until, suddenly, he felt a hand on his, taking the pan from him.

He heard the brush sweeping the floor and the contents empty into the bin, before he was steered to a kitchen stool and urged to sit.

"Was it ham you wanted?"

Usually Noah would protest, but this was the first time during the week that Josh had interacted with him at all, beside the occasion greetings of hello. Whenever they were in the same room Noah knew Josh was there just from the sheer force of nervous energy radiating from the kid. He'd spoken to Luke about it, and they'd decided to let him be. He would deal with things in his own time.

So, although receiving this kind of help in any form was usually a no-no for Noah, he made no attempt to stop him. "Ham, yes please."

He listened to Josh butter the bread and open up the ham.

"Um, do you have mayo usually?"

"Yeah. And pickles but I guess I'll have to forego those this time!" he smiled to encourage Josh to continue.

"Unless you like the taste of glass and dust in your food..." Josh joked.

Noah laughed, "Just a little ham, cheese and mayo will be great thanks."

"Okay."

Noah remained quiet as Josh worked. Again he could feel that apprehension and shame from the kid.

"I admire you a lot, you know Josh?"

There was silence as Josh froze in the middle of his task.

"I never did what you did."

"What did I do?"

"I never stood up and told my dad I was gay the way you did. I hid who I was for a long time… and I was older than you are now before I could even admit it to myself. I never had your courage."

"I doubt that!"

"Yeah well… it's the truth."

"So, where is he then? Your dad?"

"He's dead."

He heard Josh shift uncomfortably, "Oh, I'm sorry…"

Noah smiled, "That's okay."

"Did… did he know? Did he know you were gay by the end?"

"Eventually, but I never told him."

"How'd he find out?"

Noah laughed slightly, remembering what had been one of the best and worst moments of his life.

...

"So your dad thinks you and Maddie are back together again?" Luke didn't sound at all impressed as he matched into the WAOK office to file some tapes away.

Noah followed, keen he not get the wrong idea, "I didn't mean to lie to him and I swear that when he comes back I'll straighten everything out, but… when Maddie told me to just let him go, I suddenly felt this weight lift off me! It's like I can breathe again! And… I can be… I don't know…"

Luke smiled at him, "Yourself?"

"Yeah." He felt his mood slip a little at that, "I wish I could feel like this all the time…"

"Well, you can and… I'm not trying to pressure you or anything but once your dad does come back and if you do decide to come out to him… this… this feeling… this freedom just… not hiding… that will be normal…"

Wow! Was this amazing guy for real?

"I owe you."

His dimpled smile and sudden shyness was utterly adorable, "No you don't."

The way their eyes kept locking…

Noah couldn't stop staring at him and a compulsion was building. He wondered whether he dared go there…

Luke was starting to notice and was fidgeting nervously under his gaze, "Um, look, I gotta, I gotta study for this Lit exam…" he grabbed for his books and Noah found himself stopping him by gripping around his wrist. His skin felt so good…

Luke looked up with those beautiful eyes and their gaze locked again.

And Noah didn't care about his dad anymore. He didn't care about anything but the desire he felt to kiss that mouth that was already waiting slightly open for him. Their lips met quickly and Luke's hands came up to his head and he felt a million volts spark through him. He pulled in closer and touched him back… … but a heavy presence filled the room and broke them instantly apart. Luke flung back away from him and Noah turned horrified to face his father…

"Dad? I thought you were out of town?" Shit! Way to go Noah! Now he knows you were just waiting for him to leave Oakdale!

His father's face was devastated and he leaned into the doorway in shock, "Oh I wish I was!" he shook his head, "I'd give anything not to see what I just did…"

...

"Wow!" Josh exclaimed, "Awkward!"

"Tell me about it! But that wasn't the worst of it! My father attacked Luke and he ended up paralysed from the waist down…"

"Luke?" he was shocked.

Noah nodded, "He was in a wheelchair for months. We didn't know if he would ever walk again."

"Man! I can't believe it!"

"I couldn't either! I spent a long time blaming myself for that Josh! A very long time!"

"But it wasn't your fault Noah! It was your dad that hurt Luke."

Noah smiled and nodded. "Just like this isn't your fault?" He pointed towards his eyes. "You're no more to blame for your father's actions than I was for mine. Okay?" There was another silent pause, "Josh?"

The boy sighed deeply, "Okay."

"So, we're good, right?"

The kid sniffed, "Yeah and… I wanted to say thanks… you know? For trying… with my dad…"

"I just wish it had helped."

"It means a lot that you tried." Josh pushed the finished sandwich towards him, "Enjoy!"

"Noah, I'm hungry!" Nicholas exclaimed, suddenly entering the room.

"Watch where he walks will you Josh?" Noah asked quickly, worried about glass shards that might still be on the floor.

"It's okay Noah, he has his slippers on…"

"Come up here!" Noah patted his lap and waited until he felt Nicholas's hand on his thigh before lifting him up. "Josh has made us a nice lunch, have a bite."

"Mmm! I like this!" Nicholas said through a mouthful of sandwich, making both Josh and Noah laugh at him.

Noah took a bite as Nicholas held it to his lips, "Yum!" he agreed.

...

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