The effects of ecstasy were far superior to the effects of weed in Benoit's opinion, and Josh had to agree.
Colours flashed in intense and vibrant lights as pupils dilated in a perfect state of blissfulness. E made everything seem more beautiful somehow. Josh could almost believe he was wholly loved by one and all. It made Josh feel euphoric and hyper. He wanted to talk to everybody and be around people.
And of course it made Benoit all the more lovable.
For a while Benoit was content to swallow the occasional ecstasy tablet purchased off some or other kid from school, but eventually that wasn't enough and he wanted to do it more often.
Josh was indifferent. He enjoyed taking the substance, but really he only did it because Benoit wanted to.
But the more popular Benoit became, the more parties they were invited to. And ecstasy plus parties equalled a whole new level of experience.
And Benoit loved to experience anything and everything.
Of course, deciding to turn the use of ecstasy tablets into a more regular thing meant Benoit, and consequently Josh, needed to find a much better source than school could offer.
They needed to find a real dealer.
Against Josh's better judgement, they headed to the north of the San Fernando Valley one day after school. To a particular area where everyone knew drugs were rife.
"This is a really bad idea, Benoit." Josh repeated for the one hundredth time.
They stood in the packed and sweaty bus, swaying as they each gripped a leather strap protruding from the roof.
"It is aventure!" Benoit exclaimed in his usual offhand manner, "Profiter!"
"What?" Asked Josh with a frown.
"Zis fun… you know? Enjoy!"
"Yeah, sure!" Josh muttered sarcastically, "Until we get shot or, worse, until our parent's find out! You know my Dad will kill me if he even finds out I left the district! Never mind the," he leaned forward to whisper, "drugs…"
Benoit just grinned at him, "Exciting, no?"
And pretty soon, shaking his head, Josh was grinning right back. He couldn't help it. Benoit just had that affect on him.
They got off the bus at a particularly dubious looking street.
Josh had never felt more out of place in his life! He knew how obvious they were and it felt like every eye in the area was trained on them as they walked.
Hookers lined the crossroads and bums leaned against walls and sat in corners. Litter blew across the street and stray dogs barked as they passed.
"I don't think we're in Kansas anymore, Toto!" Josh exclaimed with a whistle.
"Ce?" asked Benoit with a frown.
"Never mind!" Josh replied, "Private joke!"
It didn't take long for Benoit to spot a group of around twelve youths, some their age and some older, hanging out in a children's play park. The gang didn't seem to be formed along the typical ethnic lines. They were a healthy mix of black, white, Hispanic and Italian extraction…
Benoit patted Josh's elbow to get his attention and gestured toward the gang's general direction.
Unfortunately his gesture didn't go unnoticed by the youths and they immediately headed toward them with menacing gait.
"Shit!" Josh muttered under his breath.
"You lost or something?" The tall white boy who spoke may have been the leader. He certainly looked older than the others, who had formed a tight circle around them.
"Yeah Dean-boy! They definitely lost," a younger boy said, flicking a finger at Josh's jacket, "These homies are a long way from the boulevard!"
"We are looking for, euh, ze E?" Benoit calmly explained.
Josh was seriously ready to wet himself.
"What the Fuck?" one of the younger kids exclaimed, and several of the gang burst out laughing.
"Were the hell you come from?" asked another.
"He's French." explained Josh. Wasn't it obvious? "We're looking to buy some ecstasy?"
"E, ha?" the leader called Dean asked, his dark green eyes burning into Josh, checking him out.
"If good zen maygbe we make it régulier? We do za enterprise?" Benoit suggested.
A couple of the youths sniggered once more, obviously finding Benoit's strange accent highly amusing. They were seriously starting to piss Josh off!
"Hey, Nick," the leader called over his shoulder, "got any E's for Pepe Le Pew over here?"
That sent the boys over the edge and many of them began to cry from laughter.
"Hey!" yelled Josh angrily, "Shut the fuck up!"
Josh lunged for one guy his size but Benoit held him back. And good thing too as the gang were fast to stand in front of their friend; lifting themselves to full height and glaring with warning at the attacking Josh.
"Cool! Cool!" Benoit said both to Josh and the gang. "All okay, yes?"
The gang seemed to relax and Benoit let go of his hold on Josh.
"We 'ave a, what do you call, a deal?"
Josh stared in amazement at his friend's calm demeanour. Nothing seemed to faze the guy.
"How much you want?" Dean asked.
"'ow much you 'ave?" countered Benoit.
One of the other boys, probably Nick, came forward after the tall boy gestured to him. He reached into his jean pocket and produced a Jiffy bag of tiny white pills.
"'ow much?" Benoit enquired, as though buying illegal substances on the side of the road was the most natural thing on earth.
"50 for the lot." The leader replied.
"40." Benoit countered.
The other boy eyed Benoit for a moment and then nodded. "You want to try it first?"
"No." Benoit shook his head, "If eet not any good we not buy again…"
"It's good." The boy assured him.
And it was.
Each bag purchased from Dean, the dealer, lasted them about two weeks and then they'd have to scrape together the money to buy more. They would earn a few dollars selling the occasional pill themselves, but otherwise relied upon the allowances from their Dads.
...
It took Noah a few sleepy slaps of his hand to find and silence the damnable alarm clock.
He would now pay the price for the restless night he'd shared with Luke, anxiously waiting for Josh.
But at least Josh was home safe. Whether he was exactly sound remained to be seen, but if Luke's description of him was anything to go by, Noah doubted it.
He thought he'd lain there for only five minutes, but it was half an hour later when Luke shook him awake.
"Noah. You've overslept bubby…"
"Hmm?" He pulled himself up on his elbows with effort, squeezing the bridge of his nose between two fingers. The alarm clock, which now lay on the floor, definitely didn't show the time he was expecting.
"Shit!"
"Don't worry," Luke laughed, "I'll make you a quick breakfast while you shower and then you should still make it on time. Just!"
Noah jumped up quickly and clumsily headed for the bathroom, but then paused halfway to turn around and return to the bed. He crawled over to where Luke lay and gave him a kiss.
"Thanks." He said, "You're the best!"
"Anything for you." Luke smiled.
Noah Eskimo kissed him and then went to shower.
...
The heroin use started by accident.
The first shot of heroin happened a week after Josh returned from camp, where he'd shared his first real kiss and petting session with an actual guy!
His attraction to Benoit had not yet fully formed in his mind and scared him a little. He didn't know what those feelings were or why he liked Benoit's occasion kisses. Especially since everything he was taught told him he shouldn't.
Matt, gorgeous, older and more experience, changed all that. Granted Matt didn't fascinate Josh with the same intensity as Benoit did, but Matt was the person to convince Josh once and for all that he was definitely gay.
The thing with Matt was just for fun. Josh didn't develop any real feelings for the guy and they parted that summer as friends; promising to stay in touch.
It was Benoit Josh really wanted.
And it was for this reason that he was willing to sneak off with Benoit late one night to meet Dean on their latest E-run, as Benoit liked to call it.
Going down to that neighbourhood during the day was one thing! Going at night was downright stupid as far as Josh was concerned. But yet again, he fell head over heals for Benoit's charms and thus found himself in a dark alleyway digging cash out of his pocket to hand over to Dean. As soon as the cash hit Dean's hands the sound of a siren pierced the night and blue lights flashed over the brick walls of the adjoining building, scaring the life out of them.
"Fuck! Here!" Dean shoved a bag into Josh's hand and took off down the alley, scaling the wire fence at the end with practised ease.
"Come on!" shouted Benoit, grabbing at Josh's collar and dragging him along behind him into a scrambled run.
As they rounded a corner they saw their bus just pulling up.
With shouts of, "Stop!" and the sounds of loud running footsteps behind them, they both leapt onto the bus just as the doors closed and the vehicle pulled out onto the road.
Bent over, heaving from their crazed run, both boys burst out laughing.
"Shit Benoit!" Josh exclaimed, "That was too close! You're going to get me into so much crap one day!"
"Ah! You love eet!" Benoit smiled, "Did 'e give you ze stuff?"
"Yeah." Josh replied patting his pocket, "I have it.
What he had, however, was not the packet of little white pills but rather a generous helping of a sand-like substance Josh would later use the internet to identify as heroin.
Of course, Benoit was only too keen to try it.
...
When Mia first arrived to live with them, it had been Noah's intention to convert the second guest room into a space for her. And initially he'd tried to have Mia sleep there. But inevitably he'd wake up in the morning to find Mia curled at Nicholas's feet.
So, when Josh arrived needing a place to stay, Noah gave him the guest room and replaced the single bed in Nicholas's room with two children sized beds instead. And these arrangements seemed to suit all.
Now on his way toward the kitchen and the delectable smells of breakfast, Noah did a quick check on the babies, even though he knew Luke would have done so already.
Really, Noah just liked to watch them sleep.
Nicholas almost always slept on his side in a ball like a kitten. And invariably one thumb would have found his mouth so that periodically his little cheeks would puff in and out as he sucked.
Noah frowned as he ran a thumb along his black hairline. They had arranged for Nicholas to see a child psychiatrist recommended by Betty. And even though Mia seemed outwardly okay, they decided to send her along too.
They didn't know what effect the loss of her family had had on her. And they thought it was most likely a good idea, just to make sure she was okay mentally.
Tiny Mia liked to sleep either on her back or flat on her tummy as she was now. And her long red-blonde eyelashes would flicker, as she dreamed. Noah would have paid money to know what those dreams were.
With that thought in his head, Noah left the room, leaving the door open a crack and knocked lightly on Josh's door, knowing it was time for him to get up for school.
"Josh?" he asked, carefully pushing the door open.
The dark and musky room had the unmistakable heat and aroma of a heavy night out. Josh wasn't there and an instantly recognizable gagging sound sent Noah in the direction of the guest bathroom.
He knocked, "You okay in there buddy?"
When Noah received nothing but a loud groan or grunt in response he decided to leave Josh to it.
"Better out than in!" he thought to himself as he padded up the passage.
"Josh is throwing up." He informed Luke as he entered the kitchen.
"Yeah well! No surprise there, right?" Luke responded, flipping Noah's eggs over for a second and quickly lifting them onto a plate to hand to him.
"Thanks." Noah said, kissing his cheek before taking a seat at the breakfast bar and reaching for a slice of toast from the rack. "Where was he all night anyway?"
"No idea!" Luke responded, "But if he thinks this will get him off school he has a nothing thing coming!"
"Ooh, harsh Snyder!" Noah joked, "Maybe Nat's right! Maybe you are turning into Holden!"
That remark earned him a slap on the back of his head.
"Ouch! Hey!" Noah complained rubbing the spot. "Come on babe! Josh is a good kid most of the time. And it's not like YOU never got drunk?"
Luke gave him a look like he couldn't believe Noah would bring that up.
"Okay." Noah held up both his hands as a sign of peace, "Sorry."
Luke scowled at him, "You're right, I did get drunk! I even have a drinking problem, but I always knew it was wrong, Noah! I never flaunted it in front of my parents as though it were no big deal!"
"Maybe not, but you forget something… We aren't his parents."
"No," Luke agreed, "but at the moment he's under our care so it's pretty much the same thing."
"Ah… so you would rather he hid it from us then?"
Luke sighed, "I'd rather he didn't do it at all."
Luke's frustrated expression got to Noah.
"I know," Noah agreed more seriously, sympathetic towards Luke obvious worry over the subject.
Luke joined him at the breakfast bar and they ate in silence for a while, contemplating the situation.
Then Noah had a thought, "You don't think he drove home, do you?"
Luke shook his head. "No, I checked. The car's not there. Somebody must have dropped him off."
"When did this happen hey?" Noah asked suddenly.
"What?" Luke asked.
"Only in our early twenties and already responsible for a fully grown teenager?"
As annoyed as Luke was with Josh's recent behaviour he couldn't help laughing at that.
"I know, right?" he agreed. "One kid and then two kids and now three?"
"We'll have started a school soon." Noah laughed.
"Well, you know what?" Luke asked standing and walking around to where Noah sat.
"What's that?" Noah replied, taking a bite out of his toast.
Luke kissed the top of his head, "I wouldn't change it for anything!"
Noah smiled as he chewed.
...
In the end Luke allowed Josh to stay home from school, but only after the kid followed Noah halfway down the drive and then threw up in a bed of roses.
Noah looked at Luke pleadingly, feeling extremely sorry for the kid and Luke relented.
"Fine!" he said, "Get back inside Josh."
The look of relief on Josh's face was palpable as he guiltily passed Luke through the front door.
Noah smiled and blew Luke a goodbye kiss and Luke shook his head at him, but he returned the smile. The guy was so sweet.
Back in the house he found Josh had landed half on and half off his bed. His eyes were closed, but Luke didn't think he was asleep, just protecting his shattered and dehydrated brain from the painful effects of bright sunlight.
"Come on then." Luke said, softer now than he'd been all morning.
He helped Josh move further up the bed, positioning him on his back until he was comfortable. It was as Josh lifted his arm to shield his eyes that Luke noticed the bruising behind his right elbow.
"Hey Josh?"
"Hmph?"
"What happened to your arm?"
Josh opened one eye and checked the spot Luke was stroking with one finger.
"Oh, um, blood donation…" Josh replied.
Luke laughed, "Please tell me you DID NOT donate blood after drinking!"
"No, no." Josh assured him. "It was before. They came to the school."
"Well, it's nice to know you're doing your civic duty and not just acting like an idiot!"
Josh opened both eyes as Luke drew the curtains to his room closed.
"I'm really sorry Luke, okay?" he said urnestly.
Luke looked at him.
"Really!" Josh assured him. "We won the tennis tournament against City College! We were just celebrating and I kind of over did it."
"Kind of?" Luke smiled.
"Okay, I over did it!" Josh agreed, "It won't happen again. I promise."
Luke sat next to him on the bed and patted his arm, "Good. We were really worried, Josh."
"I know."
"All I ask is that you let one of us know if you're going to be home late."
"I will, I promise."
"And Josh?" Luke asked.
"Yeah?"
"No late nights during the week, okay?"
There was a pause but eventually Josh said, "Sure." Luke smiled again, "Okay good. I'm going to make you some dry toast and fetch you some water. It will help."
"Thanks." Josh muttered.
The boy was quickly nodding off.
...
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