Disclaimers: As much as I may want to claim ownership of this famous series, I can't because both Harry Potter and Girl Genius belongs to a whole lot of different companies that I can't remember the names of at the moment. Any characters that appear in this fic that is not a part of the original series, belong to me so don't take them without asking first.

Word Count: 673

Marriage Law Rejection Letters
Letter #140
Submitted by: Quatermass
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Dear Ministry of Will-based Transmogrification Force (because I am NOT going to call it magic),

After everything you put my Harry through, you seriously expect him to go along with this? Wow. After my experiences with other wizards (which I think is a VERY unscientific term for what you are, and I'm only using until I find a better term), I thought I had seen the depths of stupidity and malice you can sink to. It says a lot when Harry and his friends would rather stay in Mechanicsburg, or within the Wulfenbach Empire, than in the Britain of your world.

Now, I'm sure that you're thinking, 'ooh, she's just a Muggle with a chip on her shoulder, we can deal with her easily'. Well, leaving aside the fact that you have already underestimated Harry more than once, and will do so again due to your egregious stupidity, let me list out a few reasons why you should be scared of me.

1. I am a Spark, or, in layman's terms, a mad scientist. In fact, I am from a very long line of mad scientists, mostly feared as the equivalent to your Voldemort. My father and uncle, on the other hand, were beloved as much as Harry's parents were... well, I'd say more so, given the way you're treating him. I'd like to think of myself as MOSTLY following in my father and Uncle Barry's footsteps.

2. I have a copy of my mother's mind in my head. If that doesn't scare you, then you don't know my mother. You know how you call Voldemort 'You Know Who'? They call my mother, Lucrezia Mongfish, 'The Other'. She is worshipped as a deity by the Geisterdamen, and is feared by all of Europe. Oh, and one thing we agree on is helping Harry.

3. I live in a castle that has a dark and twisted sense of humour, even before it got damaged. It is filled with all sorts of fun deathtraps. And it is loyal to me (for a given value of loyal).

4. I have the loyalty of the Jagermonster army and the people of Mechanicsburg, as well as an alliance with Prince Tarvek von Sturmvoraus, and another with Baron Klaus von Wulfenbach. His son, by the way, is courting Harry's friend Hermione Granger, and I am sure he is not happy with the letter Hermione received as well.

5. You have your Killing Curses, the Cruciatus, Fiendfyre...I have a lot of death rays. My first death ray drilled a hole through a mountain from one end to another. But please, go ahead, call my bluff.

Now, I have listed the reasons for you to avoid angering me and mine, but I'm sure you idiots will see this as incentive to attack. To which I say, YOU FOOLS! I'LL DESTROY YOU ALL! AND I WILL USE THE REMAINS TO CREATE CONSTRUCTS TO SERVE US DINNER IN OUR BANQUET HALL! MWAHAHAHAHA!

I'd say sorry for that little Spark rant...but that would be a lie.

Yours insincerely,

Lady Agatha Heterodyne-Potter

Ruler of Mechanicsburg

THE Heterodyne

Author's Notes:
This latest Marriage Law Rejection Letter update was recently submitted to my review box by Quatermass. Thanks for the submission. If anyone else has any letters they want to submit, feel free to send them in. lol

Notes from Quatermass: Firstly, this one, based on my "Girl Genius" crossover, "Girl Genius' Animagus".