Disclaimers: As much as I may want to claim ownership of this famous series, I can't because both Harry Potter and Fate/Zero belongs to a whole lot of different companies that I can't remember the names of at the moment. Any characters that appear in this fic that is not a part of the original series, belong to me so don't take them without asking first.

Word Count: 529

Marriage Law Rejection Letters
Letter #152
Submitted by: Quatermass
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Dear Ministry of Magic,

Dammit, you don't rest, do you? You're not content with screwing over my childhood, but you want to break up what is a very happy family. Okay, it is, admittedly, a rather strange one: my wife is Medusa.

Yes, THAT Medusa, though the whole snake hair thing was a distortion of myth. She does have a LOT of hair, though (the shampoo budget here is pretty big, as you can imagine). I brought her back to life inadvertently as a Servant in the latest Holy Grail War (and that was a debacle and no mistake), and she's now living a very happy life with me. She certainly accepts my Parseltongue, as do my sister-in-laws, Stheno and Euryale.

To date, I only have one child by adoption: Sakura, formerly Tohsaka, now Potter. She's the dearest, sweetest kid, and I'm proud to have her call me father. I'm sort of a substitute father to her rambunctious sister, Rin, whose father, sadly, passed away. And I'm an uncle of sorts to another spirited girl, Illyasviel. Not to mention that her father is Kiritsugu Emiya, aka the Magus Killer, and he still has King Arthur at his beck and call. No, really. And she's a woman as well. Arthur Pendragon was actually Arturia, who knew?

Leaving aside my problems, I'm sure you've sent a similar missive to Hermione, ordering her to break off her engagement with Waver Velvet, newly dubbed Lord El-Melloi II, and both are under the protection of Kischur Zelretch Schweinorg. I have him, plus his 'granddaughter', Arcueid Brunestud, on speed-dial.

In case you don't know who they are, they're vampires, albeit of a VERY strong sort. Zelretch has forgotten more about magic than even Dumbledore has learned, and Arc, while nice, can tear people limb from limb if they annoy her too much.

If you persist in trying to enforce this on us, I think Clock Tower will classify the ensuing bout of petrifications as either death by stupidity or, more simply, suicide. Medusa is very protective of those she loves, just like I am. And I hear Arturia is VERY unhappy about Merlin's teachings being forgotten or perverted. Don't push your luck.

Yours insincerely,

Harry Potter

Husband of Medusa of the Gorgons

Author's Notes:
This latest Marriage Law Rejection Letter update was recently submitted to my review box by Quatermass. Thanks for the submission. If anyone else has any letters they want to submit, feel free to send them in. lol

Notes from Quatermass: Another one, based on my crossover story, "Gorgon and Thanatos".