Disclaimers: As much as I may want to claim ownership of this famous series, I can't because both Harry Potter and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles belongs to a whole lot of different companies that I can't remember the names of at the moment. Any characters that appear in this fic that is not a part of the original series, belong to me so don't take them without asking first.

Word Count: 1,153

Marriage Law Rejection Letters
Letter #167
By: Sakura Lisel
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Dear Moronic Tossers of the Ministry of Magic,

About the delusional idea you people seem to have of my 'submitting' myself to become the personal fuck toy of some psychotic inbred, and obviously brain damaged from generations of inbreeding, pompous windbag of a Pureblood wizard and start pumping out babies for your societies future continued existence, I will have to politely decline that insane idea. Hell will freeze over and Satan will be giving away free sled rides in hell before THAT will EVER happen for ANY reason, so you can all just dry up and die horrible and painful deaths and go extinct for all I care right now.

Bloody get with the bloody program, you jackasses. I bloody LEFT your society FOUR YEARS AGO! If I was going to ever come back, I would have done it years ago, but as far as I'm concerned, there is nothing that is worth going back there for, since the final battle against Voldemort cost me the lives of anybody who could have made me even consider coming back over there even for a visit. Besides that, as far as I am concerned, I already did my one and only 'duty' to you people, and I don't 'owe' you anything else at all.

Thanks to your little law, I now sure as hell will not be coming back for any reason now that its somehow now 'required' by law to legally allow myself to be RAPED by a arrogant racist pig of YOUR chosing and pump his demon spawn from my body against my will just so you people can 'survive' at my expense?! No way in hell! No matter how you want to pretty the idea up, its still considered rape in some countries if nobody's willing to do it dumbasses.

Not only that, but guess what? I'm already in a loving relationship with my current boyfriend, Raphael Yoshi, and I have no intention of leaving him to take part in something I have no wish to be involved in, so you can shove your law where the sun don't shine.

Besides if you bothered take a look at the picture I enclosed with this letter, along with the accompanying medical reports from my local wizarding hospital, you would have realized by now that thanks to my current condition that I should now automatically be considered disqualified from your lame law just on principle, seeing how you people feel about non-humans.

Yes, the beautiful Lizard girl posing in a bikini in the magically animated photo who is also repeatedly giving you losers the 'bird' gesture with both hands is supposed to be me. Thanks to a... potions accident two years ago involving the Polyjuice potion, my body is now permanently locked in the body of a humanoid Salamander girl.

Trust me when I say that it's irreversible. I've already seen lots of healers on this matter and nobodys been able to change me back or come up with a good idea to change me back.

Not that I'm complaining anymore now that I have my darling Raph and his family in my life, who doesn't mind my new look in the slightest, and he and his family and all of our friends are more than willing to help me fight off anybody who you try sending after me.

Insincerely yours,

Monalisa Rose Potter

P.s. Good luck trying to confiscate my family vaults. In fact just to help you out on the matter, I've even taken the liberty to already send a letter to the goblins giving them full permission to hand over my old vaults to you with my full blessing if you come to Gringotts to confiscate them. I don't even need them anymore. *cackles* Too bad for you, except for about one hundred and fifty galleons, seventy-five sickles, and fifty knuts that I left in each of my seven family vaults, there isn't much left for you to confiscate because I already cleaned out everything that was worth keeping, back when I left the country four years ago and had all of it transferred to a branch Gringotts bank near where I am living that has higher security and won't bend over backwards to give you my property, especially with all the money I paid them to ensure the highest level security maintance that they possess. So you will just have to make do with the money I left behind. *cackles* Have fun spending it. It was just collecting dust over there anyway while I was away so I'm sure you can find a better use for it.

P.P.S. Before you get any ideas, the answer is no you can't use your recently made law to legally accuse me of stealing it. Like I said before, MY money hasn't been on British soil in four years, and I have become a legalized citizen of the American wizarding world and I have also renounced my citizenship with England. There was no law back then that forbade me from having it transferred elsewhere, and my M.A.C.U.S.A. appointed lawyers say that your lame marriage law has no claim to my wealth now, since its no longer on your shores so you have no legal right trying to demand that I send it back to you. If you want to throw a fit about it, take it up with my friends and allies in M.A.C.U.S.A., and see where it gets you.

Author's Notes:
This latest Marriage Law Rejection Letter update was created by me in a fit of inspiration. lol If anyone else has any letters they want to submit, feel free to send them in. lol

If anyone is wondering about who Monalisa Potter is, for those of you who dont remember or never heard of this TMNT character, back in the old Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoon canon, she was a real Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles character who showed up in the old hour long Saturday morning cartoon series. She was a teenage mutant Salamander girl, who used to be human. She and Raphael hit it off well in that episode, and I thought it would be a nice idea to do one involving Monalisa. lol