All I can say is, poor Ray. :(
P.S. I finished this a couple of days ago, it just needed to be edited. However, I just got home and I am too exhausted to actually read through this. Please excuse the mistakes.
"How have you been?", Ray whispered softly against Tala's neck. He seemed unwilling to loosen his hold on the redhead's neck.
He smiled, the Chinese man's vanilla scent and soft touch all but overwhelming him, and regretfully pulled away. The urge to look at Ray's face was too strong, eyes taking in the familiarly angled features and thin lips.
"Not quite alright but I will get there now, it seems."
Ray mirrored the curve of his lips. His fingers lifted and dusted across Tala's cheekbone, followed in quick succession by his lips. Tala's own tightened on his hips.
The Chinese's lips felt cold against his skin and he shivered. Their soft flutter against his skin made his fingertips tingle.
However, flashbacks of the last time they had stood together like that assaulted Tala's mind and, instinctively, he tried to step back. Ray's hands latched on to his arms.
"I dumped Bryan." he confessed into the crevice of Tala's neck, pulling him closer and drawing his arms back around his waist. The two felt shivers climb up their spines, the more entangled their limbs became. Unable to find another excuse to deprive himself of his partner's touch, Tala's hands groped Ray's sides, pushing him towards the wall and crowding him against it, their lips devouring each other's in a mad frenzy.
Ray moaned and his fingers softly sifted through and latched on to the scarlet strands, pulling his partner that much closer. His lips parted and Tala's tongue reached out to prod the soft wetness of his mouth. The shorter man met him… well, tongue for tongue as he took to massaging the back of Tala's neck.
They remained blissfully unaware of the world around them for a couple of minutes, before parting, breathless and blushing. They grinned at each other not bothering to step back and unwilling to shatter the silence with words, not like they could think of ways to put their feelings into words just then anyway.
"So, uh…", Tala started, saw he had nothing to say and clamped his jaws shut. He hadn't realized how awkward this was going to be. Truth be told, he had completely lost all hope that he would ever get to see Ray again, much less hold him and kiss him like this. So now that he was completely overwhelmed, his mind was misfiring on him and making it impossible to think.
Thankfully, for somebody who had been half-asleep minutes ago, Ray was feeling very articulate.
"Your self-image is rather blown out of proportion, isn't it?" He leaned his head to the side. "You are not half as charming as you think you are.", he chuckled.
"You bring out all sorts of different sides of me that I never knew existed. Way to go shirking responsibility, kitty-cat.", Tala smirked.
Ray leaned up and nipped at the tip of Tala's nose. "No, I am starting to think you are out of touch. Need a buffer period."
Tala returned the little bite on Ray's ear. "You give yourself far too little credit, baby."
The nickname made Ray's eyes warm and he brushed a kiss against Tala's knuckles before stepping away. "Come on I'll introduce you to Sky and Nala Kon."
Tala raised a brow and skipped ahead to grab on to Ray's fingers, with excitement churning in the pit of his stomach. Not because he was about to meet his cats (though it felt very much like an honor if he was honest with himself), but because being in his presence naturally had him grinning from ear to ear.
"I gave my pups my name too. It seems we'll get along well."
Ray raised a brow and scoffed. "I just dumped my boyfriend, Tala. I hope to God you're not still unsure of how well we get along."
Tala tugged Ray to a stop and gave him a bruising kiss, unable to get enough of these new-found liberties. When they parted, he whispered breathlessly, "Does it look like I'm unsure?"
Ray smiled.
Giddy, the two stepped into Ray's cluttered living room. The man seemed to hate minimalism as an aesthetic. His presence was obvious everywhere in the house, in the book inverted on the armrest of the sofa or the empty mugs on the center table, the rows of frames hanging along the walls, or the keys, laptop and loose t-shirts thrown haphazardly across various pieces of furniture. Right in the middle of the sofa, cuddling into a fluffy yellow animal cushion was a large and rather moody looking tabby, who pinned Tala with her grey eyes as soon as the tall redhead entered. If she were a girl, Tala would have expected her to raise an imperious brow and flip her hair over her shoulder.
Ray picked her up and held her out to the now nervous-looking Russian. "Careful, she can smell fear.", he warned.
Tala reached out a hand to stroke the cat between her ears. He wasn't a cat person, necessarily, but Kai's blues had never given him such a hateful look before. "I am guessing this is Nala."
"The one and only." Mercifully, Ray put her down again. She immediately stalked off to curl up to her pillow again.
"Well, to find Sky now." Ray mentioned, before turning away. Tala followed with a sheepish frown.
"Are you trying to distract me? What are you trying to distract me from?"
"I… uh… I don't know. I am just, I don't know what we are supposed to be doing." Ray crossed the threshold to the kitchen.
"I am good to make out some more."
Ray gave him a withering glance over his shoulder.
"Or, we could, like, talk." Tala raised his hands, palms up before stepping closer to him. Placing a hand on his lower back he guided Ray to step closer to him. If anything, the shorter man made a convenient chin rest, an opportunity the redhead promptly exploited.
"What's bothering you?"
Gently, Ray lead Tala to climb up and sit on the countertop, looping his arms around his waist and settling himself comfortably against the redhead's shoulder. The position in which he stood in made his butt jut out but Tala refrained from making a comment about it, instead saying, "You seem awfully comfortable." His fingers worked to smooth through Ray's wavy locks, tucking them behind his ears and then pulling them out.
Ray poked his stomach. "Blame the pudge."
Tala felt a gasp leave his mouth. "There is no pudge!"
The Chinese man's chest vibrated with a chuckle and Tala laid a kiss atop his head. "There really isn't any pudge.", he insisted.
"Well, I'd do you anyway with or without it."
"Excuse you, who says you'd get to?"
Ray chuckled again. "Oh woe. Whatever am I gonna do with all my libido now?" He wiggled his hips, causing his sides to brush against Tala's knees making the redhead snicker and grab on to his shoulders to steady him. Leaning up, Ray snuggled into Tala's neck, making him peck his forehead and hair.
A soft meow interrupted their nuzzling and they turned to see a grey Maine-coon staring at them from the opposite end of the counter-top. Ray glared back at his cat while Tala remained clutching his head.
After a few seconds, the kitty decided the humans weren't worth her while and settled down to imperiously lick her own paws. Ray rolled his eyes and pulled Tala off the countertop.
"Apparently Sky doesn't approve of PDA in the kitchen." He called out as he led Tala through another door and into his bedroom. "Nor does she approve of you."
"It's alright. I am good with the one cat that adores me."
Ray flipped him off while settling himself leg over the other on the corner of his king-sized bed, which took up almost all the space in his moderate-sized bedroom. A cluttered worktop stood in one end, which was a complete mess of sketches, outlines, re-draws, paints, and brushes. It seemed he had recently been working on something. In the other corner, a bedside table stood, similarly crowded by magazines and other tad-bits that definitely didn't take priority over a fucking dresser, which the crazy man did not seem to have in his room.
"Well, no kitchen sex for us in the future then?", Tala winked while moving towards the table, curious as to why the fuck Ray didn't keep this in his workroom, which he OUGHT to have because no way in hell were these all the supplies required by a moderately successful artist.
"Hmmm, I don't know. I can con Max into babysitting for them some evenings."
Tala's snicker caught in his throat as his eyes found the canvas laid out carefully over newspapers, off to the side. For a second, he forgot how words worked or that he had to pay attention to his partner when they talked. He remained rooted where he was, eyes scraping over the detailed portrait of himself. Ray must have taken inspiration from the night in Mariah's pool because his hair was down around his face and there were glistening water droplet details in his hair. The portrait ended on his bare collarbones and captured the triangle of freckles at the base of his throat with careful precision. His eyes were lidded as his intense gaze lay on the viewer, head tilted and a faint smile playing on his lips.
It was the expression, out of all things, that made Tala halt in his footsteps. He hadn't realized the amount of desire his face displayed that night, nor did he realize how desirable Ray perceived him as. He had read somewhere that a picture was less of a depiction of the object, and more of a reflection of the artist's perception of it, and if this was how Ray perceived him, he couldn't ask for more. Apart from the meticulous attention to detail, Tala felt embarrassed to admit how attracted he was to this picture of himself. It was like Ray had taken all the finer qualities of his character, and displayed them on to this canvas because this man seemed way better of a person than Tala could ever hope to be and he felt flattered to know that was how Ray saw him.
Being so caught up in the painting he never noticed Ray next to him till he put his arms around the redhead's waist.
"Do you like it?"
Like was a weak word for how touched Tala was right then.
"Nobody has ever done something like this for me before."
"If that's your way of telling me I'm in a league all of my own then I'd like to say, I'm aware."
Unable to help the full belly laugh that escaped him, Tala shook his head and turned around in Ray's arms. "Yes, that's exactly what I am saying."
Gently he lay his lips over Ray's, kissing him languidly, tangling their fingers together and ceasing to care about the world spinning around them. Shallow breaths caressing tingling lips, they parted only for the mere seconds it took Tala to drag Ray to the bed and throw him down on it before he climbed in beside him and they resumed their rapidly heating make out session. Tala wasn't sure how many boundaries Ray was comfortable with him crossing, though so he kept his hands on the previously established safe territory of his torso, and did his damnedest to keep pace with his partner.
Ray, however, had no such concerns.
His fingers worked on the buttons of Tala's shirt, quickly pulling it open and laying his hands over the Russian's pale torso. Tala lifted his shoulders, allowing for Ray to slip it down his arms and throw it off to the corner of the room. He ducked his head down to kiss moist trails across Tala's collarbones and the redhead threw his head back, giving him full access to his neck. If that wasn't hint enough that he greatly appreciated Ray's ministrations, he did not know what would be.
Grabbing onto the shorter man's slim waist he pulled their bodies completely flush against each other, warmth spreading in his groins and making him chase every touch of the artist's that he could find. Their fingers threaded together as Ray pinched and stroked his nipples with his free hand, mouth otherwise occupied on the base of Tala's throat.
Lazily, Ray drew Tala's hand to his body and laid it to fully cover his half-hard dick from over his sweatpants. Motivated by this obvious sign of Ray's willingness to go further, Tala hooked his fingers into the hem of his pants and stopped to lay a gentle kiss to his temple before hooking them down.
Ray sat up to facilitate the removal of the garment before giving himself two hard pumps through his boxers. "I don't know if I wanna go full way yet…", he warned Tala, before drawing his underwear off his legs.
Tala felt a grin ghost across his lips and he pulled Ray's face down for an assuring kiss. "Stop me whenever you feel like it.", he whispered before his eyes brushed down to take in all the skin peeking out through the fabric of Tala's dark blue shirt fluttering down his tanned thighs.
Ray was smaller than him, he noticed with a cocky mental nod of the head, but also quite thicker so he didn't mention it. Instead, he moved forward to press him down onto the mattress and hover over him, lifting his shirt to bunch underneath his armpits. He leaned down to kiss Ray's abs and trail his fingers down his sides. Ray's hands lifted to unbutton his shirt but just as he was about to push it off his shoulders, Tala grabbed a hold of his wrists and pinned them away.
"You keep that on."
There was something incredibly sexual about Ray just laying there with his rapidly darkening eyes, and softly rising chest, covered in a delicious sheen of sweat wearing just his shirt, and that too, barely.
Ray licked his lips and arched up to meet Tala for another breathtaking kiss. The redhead went back to swiping his hands down Ray's sides before grabbing a hold of the base of his cock. Moving lower over his body, Tala lifted Ray's hips and nipped sharply at his butt. The Chinese man laughed incredulously.
"You really are a fucking dog."
"Woof!", Tala grinned. Licking the tingling indentions, he dug his teeth back in with a little more pressure. Ray hissed and his hands fisted in Tala's hair but he made no move to pull his head away, so Tala went in to suck at the abused skin.
Could you leave a hickey on someone's butt?
Busy with his feast and pleasantly distracted by Ray's soft groans, he didn't register the click of the front door, or the very obvious footsteps falling outside the room. He didn't register the presence in the doorway and perhaps that millisecond of delay was what ultimately ruined everything again.
A scoff drew their attention to their audience. "You moved on fast, Kon."
Tala tore away from Ray and his eyes found Bryan's. Cerulean blue and jade green blew out in sync and before he knew, Bryan was barging into the room, grabbing a hold of his jaw and fixing to punch his daylights out.
"No! Stop!"
His face still being uncomfortably squeezed in Bryan's hell grip, Tala saw Ray latch onto his, no, their ex's other hand with all his might, successfully stopping Bryan's attack.
"What are you even doing here?!", he shrieked.
By this time, Tala had gained enough of his bearings to pull out of Bryan's hold.
"Him?! Really?! He is who you dumped me for?!" Bryan was positively frothing at the mouth and with a snarl that should legally be reserved for four-legged creatures residing deep, deep within the forest, he pushed Ray back down on to the bed.
"Look at you! Whoring yourself out to him the moment my back is turned! 'I am not comfortable with sex right now, Bryan. I need time.'" He mocked cruelly, in a high-pitched voice. Tala saw Ray cringe at that and immediately went to his side, pulling the shaking man into his arms.
"Get the fuck out of here, you fucking cunt!", Tala had never screeched at anyone in that sort of voice before, and had he been in his senses, he would have stopped and cringed. However, right now he was livid... and terrified.
Bryan's animalistic green eyes narrowed down at him. "How could you, Ivanov?! How could you come in here and ruin the single-most amazing thing of my entire life?!"
Tala wanted to point out he didn't look particularly sad, just majorly offended but he didn't need the entire affair displayed in front of Ray like this. He absolutely did not need to feel used again. He had had enough of that with Lee already and Tala knew that if the truth came out, that was exactly how he would feel.
"Bryan, you need to leave or I'll call the cops.", he said shakily.
"Oh call whoever the fuck you want to call, asshole! I am not leaving before getting some good answers out of him!" With a savage growl, he pulled on Ray's arm, dragging him off the bed and back into his side. Ray hissed and Tala saw him dig his nails into Bryan's wrist till a single bright rivulet of red flowed down the white skin of his arm.
"So?! What was the deal?! What does he have that I didn't?!", he swung Ray's arm from side to side till the shorter man gave a growl of his own and slapped Bryan across the face. As his hand flew to his cheek, Ray stepped back immediately zooming in on his discarded pants and tugging them up his legs before turning to face the stunned Russian again.
It didn't look like it had ever occurred to Bryan that Ray would raise a hand to him.
"I absolutely do not owe you any answers you piece of trash! How you've treated me all this time is fucking disgusting! We were bound to end at some point, it has nothing to do with him except he sped the process up a little by showing me how vastly differently somebody who actually cares about me would behave!"
Bryan's features twisted into a bitter grin. "Oh? Care?" He licked his lips. "Did you just say he cared about you? And I didn't?" A dry chuckle escaped his throat.
"Bryan, don't do this." Unbeknownst to him, Tala's tone had gone from commanding to pleading as he stepped closer to Bryan, who simply ran a soft finger down his cheek.
"Oh baby, shush. But then you always were a better liar than me."
"He doesn't deserve this, none of it is his fault!"
"Well, I can definitely see why he thinks you care."
"What do you mean?", Ray called out. His arms were crossed over his chest and his tone was guarded. When he glanced at Tala, it was with the same amount of detachment that he first did in that bar. Tala felt a shiver run down his back.
"It's nothing, Ray." Tears were slipping down his cheeks now, which sucked because he'd sworn he would never cry in front of Bryan again.
"Isn't that… your shirt?", Bryan huffed out a laugh. "That's the shirt you wore to that gangrene-infested slut's party! Wow." He shook his head.
"What the fuck is happening right now?", Ray questioned.
"Patience, my love. You tell me. How long have you known Tala here?"
"How do you know each other?"
"I'd hazard a guess roughly around the time I told you to quit working at that piss shop."
Tala's eyes met Ray's and he didn't like what he saw there.
Reading the truth in Ray's injured expression, Bryan turned to Tala. "Well, I have to give you credit for speed. Tell me, what was the secret? How did you get him to spread his legs so fast?"
"Don't talk about him like that."
"Hey, are you making demands now? Tal, can't you see, the ball's outta your court now, but you won in the end so…", Bryan shrugged and turned back to watch Ray's expression turn more anxious.
"What did he win?", Ray interrupted and Tala felt his heart was about to jump right out of his chest.
"This little game of ours. You were the challenge, and the prize, and that is just how far his 'care' for you goes."
Eyes wide and mouth open, Ray turned to Tala just as the redhead let out a vehement denial.
"What the hell is he saying?" The mask was cracking now. There were tears pooling in those bright golden eyes, tears that froze and formed into sharp little glass shards presently plunging into the redhead's chest.
"It's not true. You are the most important person in my life right now, I swear to you Ray."
"Yes, because showing up people is just that important to you isn't it?"
"Do NOT twist my words, you bastard!" He turned and moved towards Ray frantically, only to have him pull away. "Ray, listen to me, he's just manipulating you. He's mad at me and trying to destroy us, babe…-"
"Just like what you did to us? You see Ray, he had his reasons for why he grew closer to you, lead you on to think he cared and all that fancy stuff, which he never did. I'd bet my life he doesn't give a shit about you."
"Stop talking around, get to the fucking point!", Ray hissed.
"I had been with him for a year and a half already when I fell in love with you but you weren't putting out and I had needs, okay? So I kept him around. And he found out, apparently. You're smart enough, you can see how it goes, can't you?"
Ray gasped shortly as if somebody had punched him in the face. "You were cheating on me?"
With a cruel smile, Bryan nodded exaggeratedly. "And when he found out he probably said, I'll make Ray cheat on Bryan with me to get even, and here we are. All made possible because your emotions are flaky like a child's and you're a whore for attention, obviously."
Ray's eyes remained trained on Tala in silent question. The Russian shook his head but was unable to spit a word in denial. How could he? How could he lie to Ray's face like that? Admittedly, his motives had changed mid-step but his intention was what Bryan had stated. As difficult and guilt wracking as it was to simply hide the truth from Ray, actually throwing a white lie in his face, even if it was for his own good, was something Tala was positive would absolutely break his spirit.
So he said nothing, merely shook his head, as if trying to make Ray read the sincerity of his emotions in his eyes.
A chuckle drew their attention away from each other.
"Can't deny that, can you?", Bryan grinned. "Go on, tell him if I'm lying. Didn't you approach him first all because you wanted to use him to get revenge on me?"
Feeling a jolt of fear halt his racing heart, Tala turned back towards the enraged and betrayed looking Chinese man. "Ray, listen to me, please. I admit that was the wrong thing to do, but that stupid plan of mine has been the last thing on my mind since we met that day for dinner the first time. I promise you…-"
"Of course,", Bryan cut him clean off. "You can choose to still keep trusting him if you want but really Ray, by now you should understand, everything he has said to you has been a lie. I mean honestly, he could've just told you I was cheating on the two of you right? But he didn't because that's the sort of bitter and manipulative little fucker he is, and you let yourself be used by him.
"Oh! And remember when I first asked you to quit the job? Only did that because he came back home from the shelter that day and went on and on about how the cute Chinese man who worked there kept checking him out. Obviously, I can see it was all a lie now, but won't you get mad if somebody came and told you your boyfriend was perving on them?"
Ray's wide eyes narrowed in what Tala hated to describe as loathing. "You purposefully drove a wedge between us?!"
"I am sorry I was being an idiot…-"
"AND HOW THE HELL DO I KNOW YOU AREN'T STILL LYING TO ME?!"
"He was cheating on you already!"
"That has absolutely nothing to do with any of this!", In a second Ray was upon him and seemed about ready to choke him to death. "You could've told me! You could've told me he was cheating on us! But you wanted to hurt me. No, you wanted to use me to hurt him.
"It's like I never even figured as a living, feeling person to you. I was just a means to an end! And then everything you said to me, every time you told me I could trust you… Like a fool, I believed every word of yours." His teeth chattered as he shivered, unable to keep his breathing calm anymore.
"That's all I have ever been, a means to an end. Someone to be used and discarded as convenient." He scoffed. "Don't even know what I have ever done to deserve any of this. What did I do to you, to either of you? Why…"
Tala could feel his head spinning, and knew that if he didn't sit down right then, he'd collapse but he knew Ray was in a way worse state. With an effort and an unanticipated stumble, Tala advanced towards his silently crying partner, only to have Ray pull away from his outreaching fingers as if his touch burned him. His face was slowly losing the flush of anger, and turning pale, tear tracts down his cheeks tearing Tala into two.
Ray's knees gave in, and he feebly dropped on to the bed, lips downturned and eyes vacant as an invisible weight made his shoulders sag. His arms lay limp by his side, and when Tala made to grab his hand, he flinched but didn't seem to find the strength to pull back again.
In a flash, Tala was on his knees in front of him. He cupped Ray's face in his hands. "Baby, I am sorry I know I fucked up but hurting you or using you, none of that has been on my mind in forever now. You make me feel things I have never felt before. Not with him or anybody before him. That's why I decided to dump him because I realized what you meant to me. I told him I'd found someone. I found you. Why don't you mention that, Bryan?!" Tala whipped his head around to face the lazily smirking Russian, who leaned against the wall with the same casual grace that had first attracted Tala to him.
"Did you? I don't remember.", he shrugged.
"You bastard!", Tala spat before turning back around to face Ray. Damp golden eyes were staring right into his, but there was no question, no expectation in them anymore. Tala wasn't even sure his words were reaching the artist anymore. Shuddering, he pushed on, hoping he would somehow stumble upon the right words to ease the ache in Ray's heart.
"Please Ray, you are the most important person in my life right now. You're what matters, and nothing else. If you want to never have anything to do with me anymore, I will understand, but I need you to know that you're the most precious person in my entire world. I feel so strongly for you, its like I might burst. I even feel like… sometimes I think I might even be in lov-…"
A tight, stinging slap made Tala's head swing. When he dared to look back up at Ray, he didn't find a single trace of the rage that powered the assault. All he saw were shaking shoulders and a quivering palm pressed to Ray's forehead. Tears fell.
"Don't. Don't say you love me. If the is what love does to people, I don't wanna be loved by anyone ever again."
Tala bit his lip, his own tears starting to well and cloud his vision. "I don't deserve your trust I know but…-"
"Why are you doing this?"
Tala paused.
Ray removed his hands from his face, and selfishly Tala wished he hadn't. Looking at Ray's face now was gutting him alive.
"The game's over, you won. You defeated him, and you almost had me just now. Why are you still trying to hurt me? What will it take? What will make you stop? Would you like to fuck me in front of him to really drive it in to his skull that he lost? Or to remind me of my place in this world? Lee didn't quite stress it enough, and it seems like I forgot again. Really though, If that's what you're after, go right ahead I won't stop you."
Tala had never been punched in the stomach but he could easily describe the sensation because that's how he felt at that moment. Unable to find it in himself to say a word more, he let his tears slip out and fall onto Ray's right knee.
"Get out.", Ray whispered softly. "Leave me alone, both of you. Get out of my house."
Bryan scoffed. "I was only here for my watch that I left here this morning anyway." His footsteps padded out of the room and Tala was left alone with Ray again.
His mouth opened but Ray held up a hand.
"Please leave me alone, Tala. I don't even wanna see your face ever again."
His legs moved on their own, pulling him further and further away from the broken looking man seated on the edge of the bed. He was still wearing Tala's shirt and the sight drove the truth of what had happened into his skull. Bile and panic rose simultaneously, and before he knew he was pulling his shirt on while blindly running through the unfamiliar house, vision blurred and noisy sobs tearing through his chest.
As soon as he was out of the door, his shaking legs took the drop, and his knees met the hard gravel. His shoulders shook. He didn't know how he managed to draw his phone out, or call Kai. He didn't notice how long it took for the slate-haired man to reach him. He didn't feel the warmth that his arms provided as they wrapped around him and pulled him away. All he knew were the tears that won't stop falling, both his and Ray's.
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