Disclaimers: As much as I may want to claim ownership of this famous series, I can't because both Harry Potter and Pirates Of The Caribbean belongs to a whole lot of different companies that I can't remember the names of at the moment. Any characters that appear in this fic that is not a part of the original series, belong to me so don't take them without asking first.
Word Count: 1,515
Marriage Law Rejection Letters
Letter #193
By: Sakura Lisel
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To Whom It May Concern,
This is truly either madness... or utter brilliance that you people have the nerve to send this type of letter to me of all people. Your delivery owl is very lucky to have found me during one of the days that my ship was above sea level. Usually we are sailing the seas under the water, and we can go for days/weeks/months we come back to the surface.
Neville Frank Longbottom. It has been such an extremely long time since I last heard that particular name, that I've nearly forgotten that it was mine at one point in my life until I changed my name to my current one.
Seeing what year it is right now, I'm surprised you even bothered sending me this letter begin with, because I bet after being 'missing' for about fifteen years, my former family should have had me declared dead by now when I never came back to them.
My crew and I truly had a hearty laugh when we read your missive trying to inform me about my impending marriage to some girl I do not know, as if you seriously have any form of say at all in whether I chose to marry or not, or when I will marry, or who my future bride shall be and have the nerve to assume that I would simply quietly go along with it just because you said I will without a fight or arguement.
Though I am more than sure that the Ms. Luna Lovegood whom you are trying to pair me up with is truly a nice girl and everything, but I'm sorry to say that there is only one woman who holds my heart, and no silly little wench of a witch will ever come close to replacing her even though my beloved Elizabeth is now long gone now, though our legacy lives on through the children we had together and their descendants.
You can take your marriage law and shove it up your asses, you scallywags, because I am neither willing nor available to take part in it. Even if I was interested in helping out with your 'repopulation problem', certain… circumstances make it near impossible for me to 'return and do my duty' even if I wanted to go back to England.
As far as I am concerned, I haven't been a part of your society since the day my dear old great-uncle Algie Longbottom, tried to drown me back when I was six in an attempt to 'bring out my magic' as he put it. That latest attempt upon my life wound up causing my magic to save me by transporting me over three hundred years into the past where I found a new life and family.
Yes, I said three hundred years, which means I'm far older than just about everyone currently living in Magical Britian thanks to the circumstances I mentioned before, and far as I am concerned, your laws have no sway over me since I do not live on your shores anymore.
If you care to know, the circumstances for which I speak of that make it impossible for me to return, is also the main reason why I still live after three hundred years. I am currently the captain of the legendary Flying Dutchman pirate ship, which acts as a ferry boat that escorts the souls of the newly dead who die at sea to where they belong in the afterlife.
Back when I was twenty-seven, I nearly died in battle and in order to save my life, my friends who saved me by making me kill Captain Davy Jones, the Flying Dutchman's former captain who we were fighting at the time. Killing Davy Jones bonded me to the ship, thus saving my life and made me the new captain of this vessel.
Ever since that fateful day, I've had to watch my friends and family all grow old and die as the years go by while I continued to live on in this cursed existence. Though luckily for me and thanks to an agreement I made shortly after becoming captain of the Flying Dutchman, I now have another one hundred and fifty years to go before I'm finally free, or someone kills me and becomes the new captain of the Flying Dutchman.
For the last three hundred years, my crew and I have been the ferry man of the dead, are unable to even set foot on dry land again, except for being allowed ONE DAY out of every TEN YEARS with no exception to that particular rule. Right now my last stay on land was over three years ago, so I currently have seven years to go before I can come back to land again. After the one day is over, I have to immediately return to the sea on the Flying Dutchman or face the consequences.
Before you ask, the answer is no I can't and won't come to land early to take part in your law. Thanks to the former captain of the Flying Dutchman, I've seen what happens if you break the terms of being captain of the Dutchman by trying to leave early, and I really don't want to have to spend my remaining years as some kind a half fish monster as punishment, just so I can be forced into marriage with some whelp of a girl who is two hundred and seventy-three years my junior.
Insincerely yours,
Captain Will Turner of the Flying Dutchman
Formerly known as Neville Frank Longbottom
P.S. Even if you somehow do manage to find us, you may as well say goodbye to your law enforcement officers, because as soon as they set foot onboard my ship they will never be able to leave again thanks to the magic of the Flying Dutchman and they will be forever cursed to sail the seas with myself and my crew for all eternity collecting the souls of the dead until whenever I chose to let them free from their newfound duties.
Sadly the benefits of joining my crew would be immortality, never being able age again past the age you were when you got on board, or die no matter what is done to you, but like I also said before, you won't be able to leave the ship except for one day every ten years and there is the physical punishment I said would also happen if you try and break the deal early.
You've already been properly warned. Your law would be useless if whomever you send after me is unable to leave the ship ever again thanks to the magic onboard. So kindly don't blame me, because I didn't make the rules. The magic and rules on this ship has been here long before I became captain of the Flying Dutchman, and it can't be changed by anybody except its creator, and she's a really stubborn wench of a Sea Goddess by the name of Calypso who had cursed the previous captain when she gave him this ship, and she can really carry a grudge for a long time if you get on her bad side.
Author's Notes:
This latest Marriage Law Rejection Letter update was created by me in a fit of inspiration. lol If anyone else has any letters they want to submit, feel free to send them in. lol
I came up with this idea while writing the Harry Potter is Captain Jack Sparrow from Pirates Of The Caribbean idea, only in this one its Neville Longbottom instead, where he grows as Captain Will Turner instead. *lol*
The story of how Neville became known as Will Turner, is that it happened back in his childhood, thanks to his evil Uncle Algie Longbottom and his attempts to bring out Neville's magic in his youth. One of the canon attempts Algie tried was throwing Neville into the water to try and see if his magic could save him from drowning, which it did, but it did it by sending Neville back in time where he gets found and adopted by Bootstrap Bill Turner and renamed as Will Turner. The line he used in the first paragraph was one of the lines Will always used in the movies.
Thanks for the request. If anyone else has any letters they want to submit, feel free to send them in. lol