"Each of us made one of these," Tony said softly, "It was his idea, actually."
He handed Maisy a box the size of a thick book with Loki's name printed across the lid. She took it with trembling hands and stared.
"What is it?" She whispered. Sitting in the middle of the Avengers' meeting room with all of them gathered around her, she didn't feel like she could muster anything more than a whisper.
"He proposed the idea that we each make a 'goodbye box'," Steve said, his voice tired, "In case one of us was… killed in action without a chance to communicate with the people back home."
"We all have one now," Natasha said. She was sitting next to Maisy and, though she'd said nothing to make Maisy feel better, her presence was fortifying, "He even convinced me to make one even though I don't know who would open it."
"C'mon, Nat, you know I would," Barton smiled a little at her, "I've been trying forever to learn all of your secrets and I'm sure you put them all in your box, right? Deathbed confessions?"
"Anyway," Tony said, ruffling Maisy's hair, "Obviously he made it with you in mind. You can open it whenever you want. We haven't looked at it, but I know his wedding ring is in there. He always made sure to put it there before a mission."
Maisy nodded, holding back more tears. It had been a day since they'd returned with Loki's body and she'd cried since she'd seen him. If she let loose any more tears she wasn't sure what would be left of her. So she held them back.
She'd been at the Tower all day and all night. Tony had dispatched Happy to pick up Linn and bring her as well and the teenager was currently hiding in the bed she and Maisy had shared the night before. She'd refused to come out that morning and Jarvis promised to keep an eye on her while Maisy went to speak with the Avengers.
Knowing that there would be something for Thor inside - no matter how much Loki complained about his brother - she decided to open the "goodbye box" and at least give Thor whatever had been left for him. Maisy undid the latch on the metal box and lifted the lid. A plastic snake flew out at her and she screamed in surprise and then could not stop laughing.
The Avengers chuckled with her once they'd realized it was only a prank.
"That idiot," she sniffled, setting the snake aside, "He would rig this to throw a snake at me."
"He was always fond of the creatures," Thor smiled a bit, looking like he was dwelling on an old memory.
"Well, let's see what else is in here," Maisy took a deep breath and looked down. The first thing that caught her eye was a white envelope with her name on it. She set that aside to read in private later and also set aside the envelope with Linn's name on it. There was one labeled "Thor", which she promptly handed to him and then was surprised to find one for "Earth's Mightiest Morons".
"How thoughtful of him," Natasha took the envelope when Maisy handed it to her and opened it. She took out the letter, "He says 'if you are ever reading this then I am severely disappointed in myself for not outliving you and also in all of you for not saving me. Honestly, what good are you if you cannot even return one man home safely?' and then he included a packet of white power that says to dump it in Tony's suit."
"Itching powder," Maisy quickly wiped the tears away, "He keeps telling me how much he wants to sneak itching powder in your suits. Or… he did."
"I know you're supposed to follow the wishes of the dead," Tony eyed the bag warily, "But I think I'm going to pass on this one."
Thor had opened his note as well and he was crying and laughing at the same time.
"'Dear Brother,'" Thor read, "'First and foremost, please make sure I am really, truly dead before you read this. I'd hate for you to have to read all of this sentimental sludge that I've written for you unless I am with all certainty ended. If I am not dead then you will not receive such beautifully phrased farewells next time.' Then he goes on to tell me… how he truly did love me and how he was sorry that things went bad between us," Thor sniffled, "He mentions how he probably sacrificed himself to make Mother proud. And he mentions Father, but he has less kind words for him. He… he says to take care of Maisy and Linn and to assure them both that I will keep them from harm - I will, Maisy. You know I will."
"I know, Thor."
Maisy turned back to the box and found a small dagger and the locket that Linn had given him for Christmas. But no sign of a ring.
"Mr. Stark," she said, "Are you sure he put his ring in here?"
"I guess I didn't see him do it before we left this time, but he always did. I don't know why he wouldn't this time. You sure it's not in there?"
Maisy took out the dagger and the locket and turned the box upside down. Nothing fell out.
"It's not here."
"It wasn't on him either," Thor said, brow furrowed, "What could he have done with it?"
"I don't know," Maisy gripped the box and stared at her own ring, "It's alright. It's just a gold band. We never personalized them or anything. It just… would have been nice to have it."
"I'm sorry," Thor squeezed her shoulder.
"No, no," Maisy couldn't stop the tears now, "It's fine. He probably hid it or did something stupid with it."
The Avengers exchanged uncomfortable looks. None of them knew what to say to her, she knew. They had come to an understanding with Loki, but none of them liked him all that much. She was glad they weren't lying to her, though, and telling her how much he would be missed.
With the box delivered to her, their duty was over and they all trickled out of the room, giving her apologies and pitying looks. Soon Thor and Maisy were the only ones left.
"I thought I lost him before," Thor stared off, "He fell from the Rainbow Bridge. The next time I saw him he was trying to rule Midgard."
"Who knows?" Maisy laughed humorlessly, "Maybe he'll show up in Muspelheim, trying to take over there next!"
"Maisy, last time we didn't have a body," Thor said warily, "You know that he will not come back, right?"
"I know," the tears spilled over completely, "I know… but I just, I don't know what I'm supposed to do. And then there is the baby and-"
"What?"
"Oh right," Maisy wiped her running nose on her sleeve, "Thor, I'm pregnant."
"Odin's beard!" Thor exclaimed, "What?!"
"I'm pregnant, Thor, and I don't know what to do! How am I supposed to raise a kid without Loki to help me? I don't want to move back to California, but I need help and my dad is the only family I have!"
"Whoa, whoa, slow down," Thor turned her in her spinning chair to look at him, "You are pregnant with Loki's child?"
"Well, yeah. I don't know how it could be anyone else's baby," she stared at Thor.
"This is… this is most joyous news!"
"I was going to tell Loki when he got back," Maisy said, "And then I was going to tell you and Linn."
"Oh Maisy," Thor pulled her into a hug, "He would have been so excited."
"And now he's dead."
They were both silent and Maisy tried to think of what she could do now that she was on her own. It was hard to think about anything about how much she missed Loki and how pained his face looked when she'd seen his body. But she forced herself to focus.
"Would you help me move back to California?" She asked.
"I thought you said you do not wish to go."
"I don't. My dad will be furious. He'll hate Loki even more for leaving me alone with a baby. He'll probably hate the baby," she took a deep breath, "But I have nowhere else to go."
She could already see her father and Ima raging at her for making bad life decisions. She could see them making her put the baby up for adoption (although that was just her imagination getting out of hand). The thought turned her stomach - losing her last piece of Loki would truly break her. Even if she knew it wouldn't really happen. She would never let anyone convince her to give up her and Loki's baby.
"I would not say that," Thor said, "I am your family, am I not? The Avengers all care for you. Stark would never allow you to go stay with your father if that is not what you want."
"I can't just live off of charity from Tony!"
"We will think of something," Thor said firmly, "I will speak with Odin when I bring him the news of Loki's death. He will know what to do."
"He hates me even more than my dad hated Loki."
"But he is not an unfair man. You'll see."
Maisy hoped her brother-in-law was right because even advice from Odin had to be better than the lack of plan she'd come up with. In the meantime she just wanted to go read Loki's last words to her and hope that it brought her some comfort.
A note from the author: Yeah, I'm still hiding in my reader proof bunker...
PFoD update: MetallicarBaby is crying under a mound of pillows and blankets. There seem to be many tears going around and lots of cookies passed between readers. It appears Ninja Squirrel is plotting a, uh, "meeting" with Blaze and MetallicarBaby may have daggers ready to stab. This might not end well for Blaze...
Thanks for reading! Special thanks to my reviewers:
MetallicarBaby: As soon as I posted the last chapter I felt a teeny bit like Tony in Age of Ultron when he punched the Hulk, and Hulk spits out a tooth and Tony, realizing what he's done just: "I'm sorry." So, uh, I'm sorry!
Ninja Squirrel: *offers more cake and promises of fluff ahead* I'll make it up to you! *whispers for Blaze to run for it because she's still needed for a bit more of the story* Everything's gonna be fine!
Lwolf: We shall see, we shall see!
Dragoncat: Don't worry! There will be explanations soon! I'll post again real soon! Maybe on Monday!
You guys are the best! Thanks for sticking with me and putting up with my ridiculous and possibly tear jerking plot twists! I can't say thank you enough for sticking with this story as long as you have!