Disclaimers: As much as I may want to claim ownership of this famous series, I can't because both Harry Potter and Worm belongs to a whole lot of different companies that I can't remember the names of at the moment. Any characters that appear in this fic that is not a part of the original series, belong to me so don't take them without asking first.

Word Count: 424

Marriage Law Rejection Letters
Letter #254
Submitted by: Rebonack7
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Dear Ministry of Magic,

Your missive (has been/will be) read by all involved parties and disregarded. The one you call "Harry Potter" (was/will be) romantically pair-bonded to me long before the arrival of your owl.

While I (was/will be) aware of your orders for him to separate from any and all current romantic partners, doing so would be impossible even if he (had/will have) any desire to comply. Upon his traumatic arrival in this plane, he inadvertently (bonded/will bond) with a module not meant for distribution, which (gave/will give) him a direct link to myself and my siblings. He (has not abused/will not abuse) the right to command us, and I (have been/will be) grateful for that. I (have gathered/will gather) a great deal of valuable data in my time with him.

More importantly, his link to the module - and by extension, me - cannot be removed, save for a delicate procedure that I (doubted/will doubt) you have the precision to perform without killing him. Given this risk, we (decided/will decide) against complying with your request. Harry's disdain for your efforts to control him also (played/will play) a role in this decision, of course.

To make amends for Harry's unavailability, I (have sent/will send) one of my brothers in his place. Harry (assured/will assure) me that your selected bride (was/will be) satisfied with the replacement, despite his immense size, obsidian-based biology, regrettable tendency to incinerate all organic life forms within thirty-two feet of himself, and lack of reproductive organs.

Sincerely,

Ziz "The Simurgh" Potter

Author's Notes:
This latest Marriage Law Rejection Letter update was recently submitted to my review box by Rebonack7. Thanks for the submission. If anyone else has any letters they want to submit, feel free to send them in. lol

Notes from Rebonack7: This is probably a terrible idea, but I couldn't resist.