*waves*

Italic-thoughts

Chapter 18

Tori's POV

"Wait, where are they?" Jade, Beck and I stood in the empty space Andre's car once sat. Light rain still pelted us gently.

"I can't believe they left us." Jade shook her head and pulled out her phone as Beck inspected the seemingly abandoned car.

"Cat's car is unlocked." Beck shared as he opened the door and starts looking around. "What use is a car if there is no key?" I asked.

"Try under the mat." Jade opened the passenger side door and got in. "Cat left me a message." She said as I climbed into the back as Beck held up the glittering pink key.

"Got it"

"Good, get in and turn the heat on. I'm getting cold." Jade snapped, slamming her door shut.

"You know, I was looking forward to building a sandcastle. I never built one."

"You lived in California for how long but you've never built a sandcastle? What? Did you live under a rock growing up? What did you do here when you were younger?" Jade said as she turned to look at me.

"I spent most of the time in the water. I tried once or twice but Trina or a wave would always mess it up."

"You build it farther back so the waves can't reach it."

"But then the sand is dry."

Jade shakes her head and turned back mumbling.

"Where to?"

"Well, Cat said to drop the car off tomorrow so back to your place?"

"No can do. Told my dad he can nap in the RV while mom is having her book club over."

"Your mom is in a book club?" Jade smirks

"How about Jade's?" I ask. I've always wondered what her house looked like.

"No! I am not dealing with that thing or her yappy dog."

"Thing?"

"Step-mom" Beck offers.

"She is not my mother. That little-"

"My place it is." I cut Jade off. Sitting back I spy my towel, grab it and start drying myself off.

"Go to the beach house." Jade glances at me. "Hey, give me the shirt, you've got a towel."

Sliding Beck's shirt off, I pass it up. Closing my eyes, I think about earlier. They still never answered my question on what we are but Jade did admit to liking me. I smile. Opening my eyes for a second I'm glad to see the sun is starting to peek out again. I might get to enjoy the beach after all.

We pull up and I grab the bag with my towel in it before getting out.

"I'll be back." Beck and I watch Jade head up to the beach house with her keys in hand.

"Why?" I look at Beck and he shrugs.

"Towels maybe?"

I nod and lay mine out. The sun keeps hiding behind clouds but maybe it'll dry some.

"Wanna go in?" Beck nods to the water.

"Maybe in a minute. You can go ahead though." Beck shrugs and slides out of his flip flops. Watching him I'm surprised when I hear something drop beside me. Looking down, I see a bunch of shovels, pails and a few other sand toys. Looking up at Jade I raise my eyebrow.

"From when I was younger."

Stunned I blurt out "Cat would be very jealous you know." I flinch and look at her apologetically. "I mean thank you."

"Here" She shoves a small pile of towels at me. "Lay these out." She slips off Becks shirt and I notice she is now in a bikini. Without a glance at me, she heads out to join Beck in the surf. I lay out there towels before grabbing the sand toys.

Walking down to where the wet sand is I sit down and start packing it in. I sneak a peek at the water happy to see neither of them is paying attention to me. I feel ridiculous but at the same time happy. Looking down I notice the yellow bucket is full. Setting down the shovel, I pick up the bucket and flip it over. As I lift the bucket away, the wet sand makes a squelching sound and falls out of the bucket in a wet blob.

"It's too wet." I jump when I hear Jade's voice.

"It's not too wet" Beck says as he makes his way over.

"You need to mix it with some dry sand and find the right mix."

"Sounds like too much work." I pout.

"Come on." Jade grabs my bucket along with an empty one. I follow her back up near our towels and watch her mix the sand in the other bucket." You could just get a bucket of water and just mix it with the dry sand but seeing as you already have this." She flips the bucket over and out slides a tower. "See, easy. Your turn." She hands me the bucket as Beck drops the rest of the toys I left near our towels.

"Come to join us?"

"Yep and maybe next time I'll show you how to make a real sand castle." We both ignore Jade's glare and work on filling our buckets.

Thirty minutes later we have a small village of towers. Jade got bored a few minutes in and started making little roads leading from one tower to the next as Beck and I created the them.

"Here" I look up to see some seaweed in Beck's hand.

"I think I'll pass."

"It's for the village."

Scrunching my nose I stare at it. "I don't think it'll fit."

"Sure it will, right here. Look." Jade points to the side of one tower and I look at the seaweed again with a look of disgust on my face.

"Fine." I grab the plant between two fingers and quickly drop it next to the tower.

"Not like that, it's ugly. Fix it."

I huff and move it around. "Better?"

"I guess so."

Looking down at myself I wince. "I'm covered in sand."

"You're at the beach. What did you expect?"

"Water will take care of it." Beck holds his hand out and pulls me up.

"Last one in is a gank!" Jade yells running past us.

"Hey not fair! I still have shorts on!"

"Then take them off."

I pause I can always take a shower when I get home, like I planned. I shift and feel the sand in my bottom. "Fine." I slide them off and quickly take off for the ocean.

A few steps from the water I feel arms come around my waist picking me up. I scream and start thrashing around in Beck's arms. He quickly sets me down and I take a few steps away. I hold my arm out stopping him from coming closer. I can't stop the trembles or the hyperventilation.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you." Beck apologizes and Jade makes her way over.

I nod still trying to get my heart rate back to normal. I try to catch my breath but find I can't. Jade approaches me with her hands in front of her in a placating manner. I nod as she wraps her arm around my shoulders and rubs my back.

"It's not your fault."I finally manage say. It's mine for being such a wimp. I mean who else could it have been? We're alone. I shrug Jade's arm off and I start making my way closer to the water. Turning I look at them, "Come on. I still have sand I want to get rid of." Turning back I miss the look Jade and Beck share. We stay in only long enough to remove the sand and to wet our hair. None of us really in the mood to swim anymore. Getting out we dry off and pause long enough for Jade to put the toys back into the house.

Jade's POV

"What's up?" I sit down next to my boyfriend laying my head on his shoulder.

"Nothing."

"Liar."

"This seems familiar." I smile slightly moving to his lap.

"No idea what you're talking about."

"Really?" he wraps his arms around me.

"I don't remember you being all emo this morning."

"Emo?"

"Emo."

"No, that was you wasn't it?" my mouth drops open.

"I was not all emo."

"No," Beck agrees. "You were pouty." I slap his chest and he chuckles.

"Jerk."

"You love me."

"Sometimes." I lean in and gently kiss him. I pull back when he tries to deepen it. "Now, what's wrong? You've been mopey ever since we

dropped off Tori at home."

"Just thinking about earlier." he sighs leaning back so he is lying on the bed.

"Hey, you couldn't have known she'd react like that."

"I should have."

"I wasn't aware I was dating a superhero." he shoots me a look and I glare at him.

"There was no way you could have known."

"Yeah but-"

"But what? Are you going to go through life not touching her? Yeah, that'll go over well."

"No, just follow her lead."

"That's fine but I'm sorry, not everyone is going to ask her permission to touch her. She's going to have to get use to that again. Besides,

you've touched her a bunch of times before without asking."

"But today-"

"Today was tough. She's going to have bad days. More than she needs to if she won't start talking. I mean, did you see her face when Cat pointed out her sleep pants? She looked like she was going to hyperventilate. Then the shit at the beach-"

"And before they showed up."

I smirk "That was nice."

"Yes, it was." Beck reaches up and pulls me so I'm lying down too.

"You done being mopey?"

"Yeah."

"Good. I don't like it." I give him a peck.

"You don't?"

"No." Scooting up a bit I bring my hands to his hair while dropping my lips back to his.

"Cause you're the mopey one?" he asks between kisses.

"Yes, wait what?" I try to pull back but he stops me.

"I love you."

"You'd better."

Tori's POV

"Tori! Someone is outside looking for you." I look up from my locker to see Cat hopping this way.

"Who?"

"Goes the owl."

"Cat!"

"What?" She bounces past me down the hall. "Have you seen Jade? I miss her."

"No I haven't. Who's outside?"

"Who! Who! I'm an owl!"

Shaking my head I slam my locker. Wiping my hands on my jeans I make my way to the door leading outside. Pushing it open I feel my feet sink into sand. "What?" Looking down I notice I changed from the pants I had on moments before to a dress. Not just any dress though. This one I remember throwing out as soon as I got home that Saturday morning. Ignoring the knots growing in my stomach I press on down the beach.

"Well, if it isn't my little slut." I turn quickly but I don't see anyone. Completing my circle I notice the water is gone. I'm now surrounded by endless sand no matter which way I look. Unable to stand still any longer I continue walking.

"They don't want you." I freeze.

"Yes, they do."

"Liar!" The voice thunders and I cover my ears. "If they wanted you then why did they drop you off? I bet they're at Beck's right now making love."

"Go away!" Dropping to my knees I keep my ears covered although it does nothing to keep his voice out.

"Never." The wind has picked up wiping my hair around my head. "You're mine. No one is going to want you now. They'll never want you

because you are a slut."

"They want me." I sit up.

"Do they?"

"Yes." My hands drop to my sides curling into fists.

"Then why was it so hard for you to get Jade to admit she likes you? She lied to get you to shut up."

"No, she didn't." I stand.

"Yes and Beck, what boy do you know wants to be with someone he can't touch. Face it, you're used and no one wants that." Turning I catch a glimpse of bleached blond hair and I gasp. Blinking I stare up at my ceiling trying to calm down.

"Just a dream Tori," I flip over and reach between my mattress for my journal. It's not there. Jumping up I go for my bag before remembering it is at Beck's. I look at the clock as I tug off my sweat soaked shirt, five-thirty. Grabbing a change of clothes I head for the shower.

"You're up early."

I jump at the sound of my dad's voice. Looking into the kitchen I see him standing there with a cup of coffee in his hand.

"Yeah," I finish making my way down the stairs. "Jade texted me."

"Jade… that's the mean one?"

"Yep." I yawn. "She was reminding me we need to finish our project." I pause realizing just how easy it has become for me to lie.

"At 6 am? On a Sunday?" I shrug. "Well, I was going to go for a quick workout before work unless you can think of someone who might like to join me for breakfast? I was thinking Denny's."

"Can you drop me off at Beck's after? Jade will be there."

"I think that can be arranged."

Knocking I open the door to the RV and step in. "Hey," looking up I see Beck roll off Jade, his hand sliding out from under her shirt. "Sorry, I could come back."

"Or you could join us." I blush at Jade's offer and look down. Her phone goes off and she sighs getting up.

"Where are you going?" I ask as she grabs her keys.

"Jade with Tots"

"On a Sunday?"

She shrugs sliding on her shoes. "One today, two tomorrow."

"Sounds like fun."

"It's not."

"Then why?"

"Helen said no more 'Things I Hate' videos. I'll be back." Jade is out the door before I can say anything else.

Turning Beck and I share a deer in the headlights look. "Did you know?" I point my thumb towards the door.

"No, she didn't say a word."

"So.." I let out a nervous laugh and he smiles. "Did I leave my journal here?"

"Yep." he gets up and reaches onto the shelf above his clothes and pulls it out. "Bad dream?"

"Yeah"

"Wanna talk about it?"

Biting my lip I tuck some hair behind my ear. "Maybe after I write."

Beck nods and starts grabbing some clothes, "I'm going to jump into the shower." Watching him make his way into the bathroom I look around trying to decide where to sit. 'Don't be ridiculous' I slide my sandals off and crawl up against the wall to my normal spot. Grabbing the blanket I toss it over my legs, lay down and start writing.

"Mind if I join you? " I look up from where I've been staring at my journal for the past twenty minutes.

"Not at all" He slides down on the bed and I notice the book in his hand.

"English class." I nod and go back to staring at my journal.

"Ready to talk about it?"

"About what?"

"Whatever has been bothering you?"

I think about it before sighing. Here goes nothing.. "Neither of you answered me." I pick one of the things running through my head.

Beck turns on his side. "About what?"

"Us. Every time it comes up Jade skirts it and you get quiet. You're avoiding it." I bite my lip, laying my head on my arm.

"That's because we're following your lead. Neither of us wants to push you into anything. What do you want?"

"I don't know." Huffing I roll onto my back. "I..I like you. And Jade but.." I snap my mouth shut.

"But what?" I shake my head. "Tori," he starts poking my side and I giggle.

"Stop."

"Then talk to me. You know you want to."

"Alright!" I take a minute to catch my breath and my thoughts. "I like you but I can't be with you because of what happened. The…the rape." I sigh lowly.

"You think people who've been raped never move on?"

"No, it's not." I sigh, "You don't... can't..." How could you ever want to be with someone as damaged as me? "Besides, your dating Jade. You can't date me too. The three of us can't date. Can we? And I could never be with you like that. And Jade likes me now but for how long? You know how she is better than anyone. I can't screw this up! I don't know what I'd do without you. Either of you." I finally stop taking a large breath of air.

"Anything else?" I shake my head sheepishly. "One, yes I am dating Jade but if you and Jade are okay with it, we can date too. I like you Tori...a lot." Beck runs his fingers over the side of my face. " Personally, I see no reason why the three of us can't be together."

"What would everyone think?"

"Who cares? One, it's no one's business and two, do you really think we're the only three people to ever be in a relationship together? Look at Johnny Depp, Tim Burton and Helen Bonham Carter."

"They are not dating."

"Yes they are."

"No."

"Don't let Jade hear you say that. Now next?"

"But…"

"Next?"

"I can't be with you like that." I mumble.

"What?" I repeat myself a little louder. "Like what? Sex?"

I feel my face burning and I wish something would happen to stop this conversation. 'Where is an earthquake when you need one?' "Tori...Tori, look at me." Beck catches my eye and I sigh. "I don't care. I'm quite happy just laying here talking with you."

"You say that now."

"I say that always. I'm happy just being with you and if I happen to get to hold your hand..." he holds his hand out and I slowly place mine in his. "Then I'm a lucky man." I can't help but roll my eyes. "I mean it. Now, what else?"

"Jade."

"What about her?"

"What if she changes her mind? Or gets jealous?"

"She will get jealous. It's Jade, that's just how she is but I think you'll be surprised at what it is she's jealous of?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well," rolling onto his back he reaches up and messes with his hair so that's piled up on top of his head. "That you let me kissed your cheek at the beach house. "

"I thought she was going to bust in and kill me."

I had a feeling that's what you were thinking." he smiles. "Tori?"

"Hmm?"

"You're not going to lose us. No matter what. Even if this relationship doesn't work out, we're your friends and we will always be there for you. I know Jade feels the same."

I nod but can't stop the worry. "It started off at school." Slowly I start retelling my dream to Beck.

"You were right. We do want you and I will gladly tell you that every day. So, bleached hair?" I nod and scoot a little closer. "Do you remember anything else about him?" I shake my head.

"Read to me?" Beck picks up his book and opens it.

"8th of September. I stayed up all night with Lucy."

"Oh my God, you have to see this!" Jade comes bursting in. Grabbing the cord she hooks up her camera to the t.v. and turns it on. I make my way to the couch just as she pops up on the screen.

"Jade with Tots. See the sign?" She waves it around for a moment before turning to the little dark haired boy. "What's your name?"

"Why?"

"I told you already. I'm going to ask you a few questions for a video I'm making. You agreed, Now what's your name?" I can see she's already annoyed. He crosses his arms and she sighs. "Fine. I'll call you Robbie."

"Eww, that's a stupid name."

"I know a Robbie, he carries a puppet."

"Lame."

"I agree."

"Blake."

"Alright. Now we're getting somewhere. What's your favorite color?"

"Black."

"Black is not a real color."

"If it wasn't a real color, they wouldn't have made it a crayon."

"True. Point to you. Favorite movie?"

"Lion King."

"You know it's based off a play.

"I like when Scar kills Mufasa."

"It's a good movie." Jade nods "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

"Dictator of the United States."

"We have a president. Not a dictator."

"You will when I'm in charge. Got a boyfriend?"

Yeah, his name is Beck."

"You should dump him."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah, I'll give you Canada when I'm in charge.

"Canada isn't a part of the US."

"It will be."

"I like you kid, We'll have to do this again,"

"Anytime baby." Jade looks at the camera raising an eyebrow. Then she clicks it off.

"Amazing right?" She turns looking at us.

"Well, he sure is a ray of sunshine."

"I want him." She turns to Beck.

"So your dumping me for him?" he smiles.

"That's not what I meant."

"You sure? He is offering you Canada. I know how much you love it."

"Shut up." She walks over and kisses him. "So what have you two been doing?"

"Reading." I answer the same time Beck says talking.

"Talking about what?" She settles in Becks lap.

"Us." He tells her.

"What about us?" Jade looks over at me.

"About the three of us being in a relationship."

"Is that something you want?" Biting my lip I glance at Beck before looking back to Jade.

"I think I'd like to try."

Now your job as reader is to let me know what ya think? I'm really happy with this chapter. You agree? Tomorrow is my first day back at work but the kids don't start until Thurs. So sometime between now and then I will redo the last chapter

Also don't forget to check out TheLadyMalfoy's story if your looking for more Jade/Beck/Tori. I've been trying to get her to come back to it. Let her know you want that too!

~Nikki