Disclaimers: As much as I may want to claim ownership of this famous series, I can't because both Harry Potter and KanColle and Karas and Slime Rancher belongs to a whole lot of different companies that I can't remember the names of at the moment. Any characters that appear in this fic that is not a part of the original series, belong to me so don't take them without asking first.

Word Count: 1,561

Marriage Law Rejection Letters
Letter #317
Submitted By: Ghrathryn
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Dear Ms Lilith B. Crawford, ESQ.

RE: Ministry Decree Article #20995 – Mandatory Marriage Law

I received your "letter" earlier today, and I must say, I've never seen such a waste of paper (parchment?) in my life, and I've been to a base that generates literal mountains of paper. Granted that's a major supply base for naval ports in the eastern hemisphere, so it gets a lot of things passing through its doors that it needs to track.

With regards to this 'demand' that I come in to be married to someone I've never even met. I think you have the wrong Megan Jones. Yes, that is my name. Yes, I do live in Plymouth. No, I am not a witch. I'm a Karas. More to the point, I'm a Royal Navy Captain stationed at HMNB Devonport's Kanmusu and Schattenjäger Fleet. While the combination of names I have might be somewhat uncommon, the names themselves aren't. I believe there were three other 'Megans' and five or more 'Joneses' at my school just in the year I was in, the one above and the one below, just for a start, not counting my twin sister among the latter.

There are, at last count, roughly 65-70 million permanent residents in the United Kingdom, and even if Plymouth doesn't have that amount, there's enough here that even slim odds get more than a few outings.

That aside, I believe the term for this is 'try me, see how much trouble you end up in'. You send anyone to attempt to force things and you'll be lucky if they return alive, much less in one piece. Want to know why forcing things would be an issue?

1) As stated, I'm a Karas, which means I'm the person chosen by a manifestation of the city to keep the peace between the supernatural and natural sides of her inhabitants. Usually this means settling disputes and knocking people over the head, but there are Mikura – mechanical demons that run on blood and eat humans raw – that often need to be destroyed, which I do. With a sword. Some of them have enough armour to make a battleship go green with envy.

2) I'm currently involved in the Royal Navy fighting a war against creatures called Abyssals, corrupted versions of tsukumogami of warships mostly from the first half of the twentieth century, circa 1900-1950. I can and have fought up to cruiser level ones with my own abilities and brought them down. If you're wondering, a cruiser is a ship that weighed – at that time – roughly 5,000-15,000 tonnes and equipped anywhere from 6x 5 inch up to 9x 15 inch naval rifles as their main battery – that's the shell diameter, not the gun length. Think about that.

3) My twin sister is also involved in this war, she's a destroyer shipgirl fully capable of ground bombardment with her main battery guns, which are 5in HE and trained as part of the Special Boat Service, the British Navy version of the better known SAS, she's also fully capable of holding her own against supernatural and is third in command of the local kanmusu fleet.

4) My aunt is the commander of said fleet, and she's a 'five-in-one', though the other portions of her soul are a Blue Mermaid engineer, an Argonian assassin who knows battle magic capable of killing her version of demons, a Spectral Knight that can shape shift and use enchanted battle staffs and a Strike Witch that has been fighting an alien invasion by creatures made mostly of hard light. She can, and has, killed both Abyssals and Mikura herself, and summoned aedra to aid her, not to mention she has a striker pack that lets her fly at Mach 1.6 – that is 1.6 times the speed of sound or just shy of 1220 miles an hour –and carries a 30mm assault cannon. The pack weighs over a tonne, never mind the gun.

5) My twin's sister ships – all seven of them, are all destroyers and pretty close to as capable as she is. The Z-class, or Zulus, are known to attract supernatural and shrug off hits that would leave a battleship crying in a corner.

6) There are also the eight W-class destroyer girls (Wilders), with their quirks. Wizard can actually use magic and has a cave drake as a 'familiar', Whelp has two sea basilisks for pets, Wager looks after a slime ranch that has at least two innately hostile to life slime types (boom and rad – take a guess as to what happens with them), not to mention the tars that show up when they eat one another's dung. Of course that's not even counting the two carragors Kempenfelt owns. Those giants that tried crossing the ocean into Plymouth? They tore them down and tore them apart. Alone.

7) We also recently gained the rest of the eight Minotaur-class cruisers and all four named Lion-class battleships along with HMS Unicorn, the light carrier, and two transferred carriers

8) Along with them, there's UEC Conqueror. She's an assault carrier girl equipped with a tactical missile launcher and plasma cannon in addition to her MANTA and WALRUS compliments.

9) My girlfriend is also in the mix, she's Anna Howell or HMS Umbra, U-class submarine, a descendant of Jack the Ripper, someone who was a scourge on London in the late 19th and really early 20th centuries. Push her at your peril because she will pull out her ancestor's bag of tricks and butcher you if you piss her off. Meaning expect to see your guts spread around for people to look at.

10) There's also two more kanmusu I've not mentioned yet, Devonport herself, who can take you apart and put you back together again. She's patched me up plenty of times. There's also Raven, an airship with a dragon knight as a commander, a wizard as the guy's chief of staff and a demon as a power source. She's also plenty capable of setting up and deploying bases and armies with four generals and four princesses to lead them in addition to the aforementioned dragon knight.

11) Of course, all those points completely ignore the normal naval personnel and marines around the base, of which there is in the region of three thousand of, any of which can kill you flat. Guns can fire anywhere from one to six hundred rounds a minute and are man-portable, non-man-portable guns are often either faster firing, use heavier rounds or both.

As you ought to be able to see, trying to force me into becoming a trophy wife for any magical nitwit is a losing proposition, particularly since this is just Devonport's personnel I've talked about, not even going into the rest of the British kanmusu based out of Alexandria, Portsmouth, Scapa Flow and other locales, the groups outside Britain (including the Destroyer Alliance that my sister is part of along with a couple of long-time friends of hers, one of which is an admiral in her own right, the other, like me and my sister, is a captain) my friends among the various groups dealing with supernatural BS including the Schattenjäger guild and any allied abyssal, spaceship kanmusu, aliens, supernatural creatures and other things.

Long story short, you've got the wrong girl and if you try, you die. I've got enough power at my back that we can probably eradicate your entire subspecies, not to mention a fairly direct chain of command to the Royal Family, who will probably be most interested in the fact you're trying to subvert a member of their armed forces for your own ends and will probably be 'unhappy' about your continued existence if this is the type of 'law' coming from your side of things.

Lose the law and bugger off, or try screwing around and see how screwed you are. Your choice.

Captain Megan Jones

Commander of Supernatural Operations

Kanmusu Fleet Operations

Her Majesty's Naval Base Devonport

Plymouth

PL2 2BG

Author's Notes:
This latest Marriage Law Rejection Letter update was recently submitted to my review box by Ghrathryn. Thanks for the submission. If anyone else has any letters they want to submit, feel free to send them in. lol

Notes from Ghrathryn: I've been sitting on this for a while, but this is used in the Things Involving Shipgirls That Are No Longer Allowed list on SpaceBattles (page 692). It's a Harry Potter, KanColle and Karas cross with other elements mentioned such as Slime Rancher.