Disclaimers: As much as I may want to claim ownership of this famous series, I can't because both Harry Potter and Fate/Apocrypha belongs to a whole lot of different companies that I can't remember the names of at the moment. Any characters that appear in this fic that is not a part of the original series, belong to me so don't take them without asking first.

Word Count: 591

Marriage Law Rejection Letters
Letter #320
Submitted by: Quatermass
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To the insolent fools of Magical Britain,

Heavens me! I have heard of your idiocy from my beloved husband, Harry Evans, as well as my mother-in-law Lily, and of how you turned on him when he turned out to be a Homunculus decoy for his brother. And yet, now you seek to try and ensnare him with some tart? Your insolence knows no bounds. Allow me to instruct you as to why this would be considered a spectacularly Bad Idea.

The first is that he has been through the Great Holy Grail War in Romania, and has the allegiance of a number of Servants, heroes and anti-heroes from myth and history, summoned to fight for foolish magic users for a wish-granting cup. I shall not bore you with the details of our adventures. Suffice to say, I am one of those Servants: Tamamo-no-Mae, his beloved foxy wife! I am a magic user of such power and subtlety as can never be approached by your pitiful kind, and I can also be vicious to my enemies. My would-be summoner, Gordes Musik Yggdmillennia, was the first victim in this existence of my Ippu-tasai Kyosei-ken. Or 'Polygamist Castration Fist', if you can't speak Japanese. Admittedly, it's a kick, but let us not split hairs. Oh, and while I doubt you would believe me, I was originally part of the Japanese sun goddess Amaterasu.

My husband and my mother-in-law are both seasoned fighters. We also have the allegiance of other Servants. Amongst them are King Arthur, or rather, Arturia Pendragon, and her child, Mordred, both of whom are mighty warriors, even if Mordred is rather uncouth and short-tempered. In addition, we have an adorable little Assassin, known in life as Jack the Ripper. Jackie is VERY protective of her new family. I would tell you to ask the last guy who tried to hurt Lily, her mother figure, but he ended up being rather violently disembowelled.

I could go on and on, but frankly, I feel I'd be beating a dead horse. We stopped at least one madman with a power complex, namely Shirou Kotomine...well, Shirou Amakusa Tokisada. Compared to him, you are small fry. So don't bother. I am very protective of my husband and our relationship. If you decide to take this any further, know then that while hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, that goes doubly so for a kitsune. You have been adequately warned. You should consider it a mercy if I send your fools back singing soprano permanently...

Yours insincerely,

Tamamo Evans

Author's Notes:
This latest Marriage Law Rejection Letter update was recently submitted to my review box by Quatermass. Thanks for the submission. If anyone else has any letters they want to submit, feel free to send them in. lol

Notes from Quatermass: So, here's my next letter that's a shameless plug, this one for my Harry Potter and Fate/Apocrypha fic "Love and War".