Chapter 47

Days passed, still no signs of Ruki. Kou began to joke that the bears got him, Yuma figured he had run away on a depressive strike and would be back in a month or two. Azusa didn't speaak a word on the matter, but Yui figured he suspected the same as she. That he had been perhaps hunted down by their father and could have been possibly killed. When they had fought, a one sided battle really, Heinz was injured but just enough to allow the couple a quick get away with the infant. It wasn't to kill. Though, it would have maybe better that way. Because with Ruki out of the way, she and the baby were just sitting ducks waiting to be plucked off. Azusa would try to defend them, maybe the other brothers would even try to defend them as well, but there was a fire and hatred that boiled in Ruki's gaze that day that could not be matched. A fire lit by passion and a hate that could only be fueled by soured love.

The young mother attempted to normalize their relationship by breast feeding the baby but, whenever she tried, he would bite rather than suck. A disturbing sight but one that she would give in to due to the guilt of not being able to provide the proper nourishment she knew he needed now. She knew, and dreaded, that they needed to find him something else. To hunt, kill. Her blood could only satisfy him so long. Noah uttered a pitiful cry from her breast, frustrated by the lack of blood his one tiny fang could provide in a single crunch. "When are you going to give him what he really wants, M-Neko Chan?" Yui didn't know how long Kou had been standing in the doorway for but when she turned to face him, her cheeks flushed and he grinned wider. Attempting to cover what cleavage may be showing from beside Noah's precious face, she stammered, "W-what do you mean, Kou-kun?" His smile had disappeared and he instead grew closer, doing something unexpected. The blonde watched with innocent eyes as Kou lifted his own wrist to his lips and penetrated his own skin, the movement rather a gentle kiss than a bite. He pulled away to reveal crimson lips and a bloody wrist, a single drop rolling down to his palm. "A taste that unphases me now," Kou sighed, "nothing compared to that of another. Not what really gets me going." He stepped closer and Yui unintentionally pulled back, holding the baby closer to her. Her hair was standing on end and her body stiff. Kou's eyes flickered and then his smile softened again, "I'm sure it would please you, the taste of me. Have a suck if you'd like. But only for so long until you feel that... itch, again. Let's face it," he swooned, "he's tasted you for months now, from the inside. Poor little guy is probably bored as hell. He feels the itch" His smile grew sinister.

Though she knew he was right, Yui couldn't bring herself to imagine feeding a human being to her son. Her Noah, the one she would do anything and everything for, and now she was cursing herself for not being able to provide the most important key. Nurishment. Survival. Though she was physically different, the mentality of a healthy human being lingered within her and taking another's life, even just a swig of their blood, was unthinkable. Horrible! It reminded her of what Laito had said all those months ago, something she never wanted to believe; that her own church that served her up as an ongoing dinner. She gulped the thought down and tried to forget that even humans could be that cruel.

Strolling through the garden, Yui wasn't surprised to stumble across Yuma nor was she surprised by his attitude. "What are you doing around her, sow?" He sneered. He had a full basket of carrots in his arms and was wearing a farmers hat that looked somehow adorable at him. Ignoring his tone, Yui faintly smiled and stroked Noah on the head with her free hand as she said, "I came out to see all of your wonderful vegetables. I thought maybe I could make a puree and well, maybe, Noah could even taste it-" Yuma interrupted, "So, you planned on stealing from me." Before the girl could protest, Yuma had popped one of the carrots right into her mouth. She was shocked to taste they had already been washed. With a single snap, the carrot crunched her mouth and she suddenly spat it out. The taste she had grown accustomed to was no longer there, it tasted like she had just chewed on charcoal. Yuma burst out laughing and clucked, "Serves you right, sow!" before strolling back towards the shed. Tears stung the whites of her eyes. It was clear what had to be done.

There was a long silence before Yui finally decided to break it. "Azusa-kun," she said in a small voice. His fingertips had trailed along the thick binder of the book that lay in his lap and he slowly looked up from it, his eyes tired but warm. He smiled briefly at the sight of Noah looking back at him, and Yui. "Well..." she sighed. "What was it like... the first time. You had to, well, kill a person?" Her words dribbled out like drool and barely sounded like a sentence at all, and Azusa stared at her with a raised brow. "What... do you mean..." he said slowly. He pulled the tab down on the tip of his page and then shut the book. "I mean," Yui said now more confidently, "how did it feel? Were you scared? Sad even?" She hadn't had the guts to look him in the face until a few seconds of quietness went by. She looked up to see him gazing back at her, confused. "But... I haven't... killed. No, never... have I." Yui blinked. She was just as confused, "Then how did you- I mean, well-" Azusa smiled crookedly and shrugged, "I was... well taken care of." He was about to ask why she had wondered such a thing, but the look on her face said it all and it dawned on him. His brows lowered and his expression softened. He understood. Azusa gently rested his forehead against Yui's and closed his eyes, feeling her panicked breath on his lips but still inviting them all the same. He pressed his mouth onto hers and locked them into a single kiss. Yui was the first to end it, something she rarely did, and her lips trembled when she spoke. "What kind of mother am I."

"What do you want us to do about it?" Yuma stood with arms crossed among all the others who sat around the dining table. Noah was perched in his highchair at the head and spectated the conversation, his blue eyes darting from person to person. "He feeds... from us. Until... Ruki is back and he... does the rest." Azusa's cheeks were flushed, as if he were embarrassed to ask such a thing from his brothers. Kou stare with his mouth open dumbly and Yuma remained with crossed arms. "And if Ruki doesn't come back?" He huffed, shards of carrot still stuck within his teeth. But no one had the answer to that. The table stayed quiet, even as Azusa lifted the baby and allowed him to feed from his neck.

He's right, Yui thought helplessly. Ruki could be dying as they spoke but no one knew. No one knew when or if he would be back. Apparently none of them had killed before, none besides Ruki. He truly was the big brother that all of them had needed growing up this way. Even before they had changed. Again, Yui found herself worrying about Ruki despite Azusa being by her side. Noah was drinking from him hungrily and didn't stop for what felt like twenty minutes. Even after he had stopped, Azusa contained his grip on him and held him awkwardly in his arms. It was odd to look at him and to see him as a father. Yui saw him as a lover, but also as a boy sometimes. Someone wandering aimlessly through life without a care, responsibility, in the world. She had been the same but now, after feeling that baby grow inside of her, something had changed. A feeling of ruthlessness she had never felt before. And suddenly, the thought of killing didn't feel so bad. Not if it were for Noah.