Map to You

by BriRy18

Summary: One Shot fic, inspired by the Animatic MV 『maps』bkdk by moncheveille, and the song "Maps" by Maroon 5. Alone in his room, Katsuki Bakugo mulls over his relationship with a certain green haired nerd… and mourns.

Summary: One Shot fic, inspired by the Animatic MV 『maps』bkdk by moncheveille, and the song "Maps" by Maroon 5. Alone in his room, Katsuki Bakugo mulls over his relationship with a certain green haired nerd… and mourns.

Enjoy!

Chapter: Map to You

The dream was too vivid not to be real.

Bakugo could still feel the heat of skin to skin contact. He could feel Deku's breath, taste it on his lips, and hear the tandem thundering of their hearts. As he lay on his bed, sweaty and panting, his fingers twitched in the sheets recalling how they'd curled into the thick curls of his lover's hair. How they'd trailed over the slick scarred flesh of his well toned arms, and firm biceps. The damn nerd had worked hard to gain that body, and Bakugo had revelled in it.

Despite the vividness, the tangible and emotional feelings he was experiencing… Bakugo knew it had all been a dream.

...because Deku was gone.

"Katsuki," his bedroom door opened. His mother stood in the opening, her normally chipper expression serious and grave. "Breakfast is ready."

"Not hungry…" he rolled over, turning his back to his mother. "I'll eat later."

There was a brief moment of silence, and Bakugo closed his eyes, expecting his mother to smack him upside the head, get him moving despite his complaints.

"Alright… I'll check up on you later."

Bakugo grit his teeth and immediately sat up when the door closed. What the hell was that? Since when did the old hag listen to what he said? She was supposed to smack him back to his senses, force him to get up, to eat, and pick up his life… but the normally brazen woman wasn't doing that.

"Am I really so pathetic that you have to tiptoe around me, mom?" He pulled his legs up to his knees and let out a shaky breath. "Damn you, Deku… this is all your damn fault!"

~Flashback~

"Kacchan!" Izuku Midoriya jogged up the walk of the school dorms. On instinct he snagged the back of Bakugo's shirt and sent him a nervous smile. "Aren't you gonna go inside? Were you waiting for me?"

"Get off, Deku." He shoved a hand into Izuku's face forcing him to let go. "Don't just assume that kind of shit, especially if it pertains to you."

"Mmmph Sorry." Izuku said with a muffle and turned his face so he could breathe again. Both of them had bandaged wounds and scrapes from their fight. A lot of pent up emotions and words were released that night… but Izuku could still feel there was something that still needed to be said. "I finished putting the trash away, we're almost done with the cleaning… I was thinking we could talk more about the other night."

"Tch," Bakugo jerked away walking inside with Izuku right behind him. "What more could you possibly want to talk about? We got it all out in the open, didn't we?"

"Not really… I know there's one thing I still haven't said to you… because I'm kind of afraid of how you would react to it."

"Well that's lame," he sighed heavily. "Fine… let's go to my room then. I'll be less inclined to blast your face off there."

"Mmm right," fidgeting Izuku followed him into the elevator. He tapped his fingers nervously together, side glancing at Bakugo and going over in his mind on how he wanted to phrase what he had to say.

Once inside his room, Bakugo sat on the bed and pulled up a leg looking irritable. Izuku stood in the center of the room, still poking his fingers together.

"Alright, nerd, spit it out. I don't have all damn day."

"Right!" Izuku froze up, his body tense and face flushing. "Well uh… you see…" he separated his hands waving them around as if trying to gather his scattered thoughts. "The things I said to you the other night… well it was kinda just the tip of the ice berg."

"You pretty much said that already. I told you to spit it out nerd." Bakugo let out a small explosion in his palm to give warning. Izuku made a sound of distress and went full erect in stance.

"I know I said I admired you, but my feelings about you are more complex than that. You see… the truth is… I… well…" He turned bright red and bowed to him. "I love you, Kacchan!"

"Hah?" Bakugo raised a brow.

"I love you, Kacchan… in the romantic and physical sense. I know it's gross, I know it's weird us being both guys and rivals but I can't help it. You're really important to me Kacchan, and this feeling just isn't going to go away."

Izuku fell to his knees now, bracing his upper body on trembling arms as he waited for the explosion that was sure to follow his confession.

"Is that it?" Bakugo tapped an impatient finger on his knee. "Is that all you have to say to me?"

"Eh?" Surprised Izuku lifted his head up. "Uh… yeah… I guess so." He risked scooting a little closer. "You're… not mad, Kacchan?"

"Why the hell would I be mad?" He put his chin on his updrawn knee. "I've just got one question… who do you love more… me or All Might?"

"EH!?" Izuku sat up straight again, smoke coming out of his ears. "I can't possibly answer that, Kacchan. How I feel about you, and how I feel about All Might are two totally different things."

"Bull Shit!" He sat more firmly on the bed, legs folded up, and pointed an accusing finger. "If you had to choose to save one of us, who would it be?"

"Both!" Izuku said without hesitation.

"DEKU!" Bakugo gripped Izuku's face. The young hero squirmed and grabbed his wrist trying to get free.

"Kacchan stop! Don't blow up my face!" He squeaked as he felt the sweat build up in Bakugo's palm. "Alright! Alright! I choose you, Kacchan!"

"You sure about that?" He let go of his face only to grip his shirt and pull him forward so their bodies collided. He smirked as Deku's frazzled expression got more flustered.

"Yes! Yes I love Kacchan the most! Please don't kill MMMPH!" Izuku's eyes widened as Bakugo's mouth fixed on his. His already flushed face went beat red, smoke poured out of his ears and he felt faint.

"That's better," Bakugo nipped his lip. "Don't you dare forget who's your number one, Deku."

"K-Kacchan…" voice meek, and breath panting out. "Am I dreaming?"

"Heh, let's find out."

~End of Flashback~

That first time had led to nearly a full year of physical and emotional bliss. Due to their growing popularity as young heroes, the two of them had to keep their relationship on the down low. This meant things like dates, public displays of affection, and skinship were cut back. They maintained a friendly rivalry in public so as not to let their classmates notice the change in their relationship, but they spent every chance they could together, and made excuses to be alone.

He sat at his desk now scrolling through the many text messages they'd sent to each other. Majority of them were about school, or hero work… big fat text bars were filled with Deku's endless rambles of the many heroes he'd seen during his internships and work studies. Then… every once in awhile… there would be just one single sentence that would make his heart skip beats and ache.

"I love you, Kacchan."

No matter how many times the nerd said it. No matter how many ways Deku expressed it. The feelings in his chest didn't change. The fluttering, the aching… it was a feeling he never got used to, but did his best to experience it as many times as he could.

Sighing heavily Bakugo rose up from his desk and ran fingers through his hair. Damn it, why did he have to be so hung up on the nerd? Why couldn't these feelings just go away?

Kacchan...

Izuku's voice rang clear as a bell, startling him as he jerked his head to the right. He could have sworn he'd seen the nerd standing by his closet… but no one was there. The only thing there was a sweatshirt hanging on the doorknob. Annoyed with himself he picked it up, tempted to throw it out the window… but then the familiar scent made him bring it to his face.

"Deku…"

Tears flooded his cheeks as he buried his face in Izuku's sweatshirt. He had left it there on accident when the two of them had taken a break to visit their parents. While their mothers bonded and shared stories of their childhood, he and Deku had bonded in an entirely different way.

~Flashback~

Izuku tossed his sweatshirt aside, the material landing on the floor, and accidentally kicked under the bed as the two of them tangled and collapsed onto Bakugo's bed. Izuku wrapped his strong legs around Bakugo, their mouth pressed firmly as their hands grasped at naked flesh.

Bakugo always felt so strong when they did this. He loved pinning Deku down, pressing his body up to his, feeling their heat build up as their flesh rubbed together and created such heavy friction.

He grind his crotch against his, pressing his mouth against the column of his neck and biting him firmly.

"Kacchan…" Izuku whispered harshly. "Don't bite so hard, you'll leave marks."

"Like I care, stupid Deku." He moaned against his ear. "When you make such a slutty face like that, you really expect me to believe you don't enjoy every minute of it?"

"Kacchan that's not the p-OINT!" He squeaked out the last word when Bakugo took a firm grip on his crotch. "Stop! Not so rough, or I can't-"

"Bite on this then if you can't keep your mouth shut." He grabbed the nearby pillow and put it over his face. Izuku clung to it as Bakugo continued his assault on his body. He moaned and drooled into the pillow, shooting off his first orgasm within seconds.

"Kacchan…" Izuku looked up at him, his expression gooey from fresh release. He lay both hands on Bakugo's cheeks and kissed him. "Let me do it today."

"You sure you can handle it, nerd?" Bakugo smirked and rolled them over so he sat on the bed with Deku straddling him. "Don't you die on me yet."

"I won't die…" Izuku pressed into him, laying Bakugo out and taking him inside with a single thrust. Every muscle in his body went taut but her shuddered with pleasure from being filled. "I won't die Kacchan."

"Better not," Bakugo gripped his hips, thrusting up into him. He watched that gooey expression of his change, and shift, stirring him on more. "Or I'll never forgive you."

~End of Flashback~

Bakugo panted and gasped as he relieved himself into his own hand. He lifted his palm up, looking at the result of his pent up grief and need. He quickly yanked out several tissues from the box on his nightstand cleaning himself off. Naked and shivering from his release, he curled up with the sweatshirt and continued to breathe in the lingering scent of his lover.

"I'm such a fucking fool. Why did I think these feelings would go away so easily?" He cursed himself and jerked himself up in order to pace naked in his room. He had to get out, he had to get his breath back. He yanked on a fresh pair of pants and reached for his t shirt.

"Kacchan."

"Not again!" Immediately defensive, Bakugo held his ears and stared at his door. He could see Deku now, so vivid and clear. "Leave me alone, Deku!"

"I can't, you know I can't."

"Shut up!" He sobbed the words out this time. "Why won't you go away!?"

"Did you forget?" The shadow of his former lover slowly turned towards him. "It's because I love you, Kacchan." He held his chest speaking with blunt truth. "I've been with you since the beginning. We grew up together, went to the same schools, had the same dreams. I'm not just going to go away because you tell me to."

"I hate you!" His voice cracked as did his mind. He stare at the shadow, eyes fierce and full of tears. "I fucking hate you, Deku! I always have."

"Who are you trying to convince, Kacchan?" Izuku laughed sourly at him. "Me? Or Yourself?"

The shadow turned away from him again, walking through the door. Pissed and riled up Bakugo made a dash out.

"Oh no you don't! You're not walking away from me this time, Deku!" He rushed down the steps, following the shadowy image out of the house.

"Katsuki! Where are you doing! KATSUKI!" Mitsuki shouted at her son, but he was already out the gate and running down the sidewalk. "Damn that boy.

"Damn you, Deku!" Bakugo continued to race, the shadowy form still within his sight but pulling away. He could see the blinking lights of an oncoming traffic light, but his focus was on Deku. "Stop running away from me!"

~Flashback~

The need, and the hunger just grew and grew as the days past. Bakugo had to admit that it became frustrating the more he felt the restraints on his relationship with Izuku. It got to the point he couldn't concentrate on anything but him…

...and in the end it's what made him lose it all.

The big battle between the League of Villains and the heroes came down to one ultimate clash. WHile he gave a pretty good fight, it only took the mention of Deku to shift his attention, and force him to make a careless mistake.

"Izuku Midoriya will die by Shigaraki's hand. The pupil of All Might, the possessor of One for All will fall and our league will reign supreme, unchallenged!"

"LIKE HELL YOU BASTARDS!"

His anger erupted, as did his quirk, and his aim had been off just a little but it was enough to collapse the entire building, burying himself and several others inside. Thankfully no one had died, but he and the others who had been in the building had been severely injured.

His ears burned from being lectured by so many others. His pride bruised and guilt burning in his gut. He didn't want to hear it anymore. He didn't want to listen to what they had to say. Couldn't they see that?

He snuck out of his room, in bare feet and bandages he left the hospital, determined to leave it all behind.

"Kacchan!"

He stopped, his body tense and head pounding from a nagging ache. He just wanted to be left alone for five god damn minutes.

"Go away Deku!"

Izuku stopped half way to him. His injuries weren't as severe, having only suffered a broken leg which had been easily healed by Recovery Girl.

"Kacchan…" he stepped to him. "You know I can't do that."

"Tch, stupid Deku." He whirled on him. "This is all your fault!" He pointed an accusing finger at him. "You just had to let out that stupid confession. You just had to open up your god damn mouth and change everything!"

"Kacchan…" Izuku held his chest. "I don't know why you're so upset. I just told you how I felt. These feelings weren't just gonna go away if I kept them to myself."

"Like hell, do you really think this is gonna work, Deku? I can't touch you or kiss you in public without raising eyebrows and earning disapproving looks. I can't concentrate on my job, or on school because you've flooded my mind with your gross and sickening emotions. Why don't you get lost?"

"No!" Izuku stepped toward him. "I won't. I'm sorry if my feelings are a burden to you, but they're not going away! If anyone should be annoyed it's me, I mean it's not like you've said those words back to me!"

"Why the hell should I say them back? It's not like I'm the one that's in love with you. You're the idiot who fell for me."

Izuku jerked back, his eyes hurt and raging now. Tears fell and he screamed at him.

"Yeah! That's right! I'm the idiot who fell in love with you! It's all my fault this happened to you. It's all my fault that you can't come to terms with your own feelings, Kacchan! I don't know who's the bigger idiot? You for actually believing that, or me for falling for the biggest jerk on the planet!"

Izuku shoved past him wiping at his tears.

"Where the fuck do you think you're going?" Bakugo walked behind him teeth grit. Izuku started to run and made him sigh. "The hospital is the other way, you damn nerd!"

"I'm doing what you said!" Izuku made a sprint, eyes shut as the tears burned. "I'M GETTING LOST!"

"Deku! Slow down damn it!" He hobbled as he ran, and his heart jerked as the light turned colors just as Izuku was half way in the intersection. "IDIOT! LOOK OUT!"

Izuku opened his eyes as he heard the sound of a honking car. He turned his head back, taking one last look at Bakugo before his body collided with the incoming Semi.

"DEKU!"

~End of Flashback~

"Whoa kid watch out!"

Bakugo choked as someone grabbed the collar of his shirt and yanked him away from the intersection just as a bus zoomed by. Time seemed to move in slow motion then, as the shadow stood in the center of the road, as if waiting for him.

Bakugo collapsed to his knees, shaking and pale, as that horrifying day came rushing back at him.

"Hey…" The stranger crouched down patting his back. "You okay there, kid?"

"I…" He started to answer, his throat dry. "I'm-"

"Kacchan…"

Bakugo lifted his head up, staring out at the street at Deku's shadow. It smiled at him, and then vanished as if it had never been there at all.

"No…" Bakugo's bottom lip trembled and he bit down on it as the grief swelled and came spilling out of his eyes."I'm not okay… I'm never going to be okay."

THE END

~Ask Briry~

Ugh I had myself a good ugly cry and I had to share it. The Animatic that inspired this fic was so beautifully done and tore at my heartstrings. I hope you guy enjoyed it.

Please Review!