Tori and Tris - Chapter Five - Up the ladder
Trading favours is an unpredictable career path, it's unavoidable when living in a repressive environment but surprisingly lucrative. I don't keep score, deliberately. It's part of my own personal rebellion to generously help as many good people survive and thrive as I can. The uninvited consequence is that I have accrued a wide base of friendship, loyalty and trust as well as some deep pockets of credits with some valuable sources. This makes me a target as well. As a consequence, my former gregarious personality has warped into an apparently snarky, somewhat antisocial hermit; waving to someone across the room is akin to inking their name in the black book of some discreet watcher.
Evidently my credit is good because I was able to arrange for an old friend to give Tris some weapons training, on the down low. Saturday night was games night and I remember what goes on after games night. I was happy for her, she was a good kid, she had been working really hard and some good clean fun with her peers was exactly what she deserved. I didn't see her again until Monday, where I noticed her looking quite changed, she was glowing, walking taller and grinning broadly.
She chatted happily while we stretched, I listened to her recount her games night win, the cherry was that Eric had been the leader of the opposing team! She mentioned the names of her cohort friends and described how much she loved the feeling of soaring through the city heights at speed. She laughed as she admitted that she was petrified but realised she loved the rush of adrenaline and sense of danger. Her eyes were sparkling.
Not for the first time, I realised how wrong I had been about her. My choice would have seen this vivacious young woman living a muted half life in Abnegation, cut off from her Divergence, her essence, and die in perfect safety having never experienced an authentic moment or realised her potential. I looked at her body, it too was changed and changing. She had caught some sun over the weekend, her arms were noticeably thicker, her muscles developing and rather than scrawny sticks hanging by her sides, they were now shapely, strong and useful. She was proving as Dauntless as I ever was.
"Tori," I heard her voice trying to reach me, "Tori?" Her eyes were boring into me, she had been watching me. I lifted my eyes to her own sparkling grey blue ones and allowed my final thought to unfurl itself. It was in two parts; that as a member of Dauntless I had pledged to protect the citizens of Chicago and that in a moment of weakness I failed to protect and defend at least one. This one. I tore my eyes from her penetrating gaze, ashamed.
I rose and stepped into the bathroom to wash my face in icy cold water, trying to get a grip on overactive mind. Tris asked if I was ok, tried to get me to talk, to comfort me but I adopted an impenetrable exterior however I was no less kind to her than before. My amends would begin now. I turned my attention to her training, she was listed for Fight Club On Wednesday, against a similarly ranked girl.
Tris was able to win convincingly without taking out the girl by a jab to the throat. It's hard to know what to make of that; maybe she was unable to overcome her inner Abnegation or perhaps she was saving that particular weapon for her Friday fight against a much better ranked opponent. I would have given much to have watched her fight, from both a professional perspective and personal interest. I flatter myself that a last minute thumbs up from her mentor would have provided Tris with a spark of confidence, her pride would have demanded a winning performance. But I dare not take such a reckless chance.
It has been many years since I have had any business in the pit and my presence could not have failed to escape Eric's notice. Besides, I have communicated my interest to Four, he was in daily contact with Tris and would surely make me aware of anything of interest, he could be absolutely relied upon to make me aware of anything I might need to know. I have no doubt he knows that I am training her, her progress would be too marked to escape his expert knowledge. As it turns out, Tris needs none of my last minute interference.