Next day in school Poe tried to talk to her but Rey didn't wanted to talk to him she was avoiding everything. But what hurt her the most was Rose, she wasn't talking to her either. She was blaming Rey for breaking up with with the good guy like Poe.
Rey couldn't believe it.
Rose actually freaking mad at her , so much so that she didn't even come to school today. Rey totally freaking Serious. Rose Tico is not at school, and she won't answer her phone. Rey was prepared to grovel at her feet, but now… What the hell?
"Fin!" Rey ran up to Fin in the hall between second and third period. "Hey, wait up, big guy!"
He stops and looks over his shoulder. "Oh hey, Rey ."
"Have you heard from Rose today?" she rush to keep in step with Fin's long legs.
His face grows concerned. "No, why?"
"She's not here," she told him, "and she's not picking up her phone."
"Maybe she's pissed at you because of your diva act yesterday." He shrugs his shoulders.
Ouch.
"Okay." Rey took a breath. "I can see that you're upset. You're Poe's best friend, and—"
"I'm not mad because of that," he's quick to correct her. Then he stops walking, and she stagger to a stop and walk back a few steps to stand beside him.
"Then what is it?" she asked nervously.
He regards her less severely than before. "Just a little disappointed is all. I didn't expect you to get all big headed when you started dating Poe."
"Big headed?" Rey scoff in disbelief. "Fin, you gotta be kidding me! You know I didn't ask Rose or Poe to force everyone to do what I said!"
"Maybe not, but you overreacted when you dumped Poe and fought with Rose. Did you know that I had to take her home yesterday? Poe drove her car home for her. She was really fucking upset, and whatever you said not only hurt her, but it hurt Poe, too." He's seriously let down by her;Rey can see it in his face. "Correct me if I'm wrong, but friends don't make other friends feel like shit for trying to help."
Rey nod. "You're right. I overreacted, okay? But you have to admit that some of the people here are real dickheads."
He chuckles. "Yeah, but that doesn't make it okay for you to be one, too."
"Fin." Rey blink up at him, shocked. "When did you become Yoda?"
He rolls his eyes and holds out a big paw. "Hand over those notes you promised me, and I'll think about being your friend again. Lord knows you need one."
Rey pulled her bag around and give him the notes. "Thanks, Fin."
"All in a day's work." He winks and spins around to walk to class.
X_X
After talking to Fin Rey realized she really had fucked up pretty bad. Now it was time to ask for forgiveness. Rose wasn't at school so the next one was Poe.
Right now Rey was standing outside the boys' locker room waiting for him to come out. He has weight training this period, right before lunch. She wad hoping to catch him when he's off his guard and then somehow persuade him not to hate her and be friends.
"Well, well, look who it is…" Hux taunts her as he saunters out with wet hair from his shower.
Rey really hated him.
"Knock it off Hux," Poe barks as he walks out behind him. He barely glances at Rey before he brushes past and starts walking away.
This may take some groveling.
"Poe, wait!" Rey chased after him. "I'm sorry." she start easy.
"Not good enough," he grunts and keeps walking.
Rey grab ahold of one of the straps of his backpack and pull. "Poe, stop!" she cry out to him. "I said I was sorry!"
"And I don't care!" he snaps back at her and jerks his strap out of her grasp. "Damn, Rey . You didn't even give me a chance yesterday. Give me one reason why I should give you one?"
He stares and waits for her to respond. Most students walk around them, but some slow down to listen, and a few stop altogether. Rey hate how nosy everyone is. She hate that when she is with Poe, she wants be with him, but when she away from him, she think of a million reasons why she doesn't want to be with him.
Don't call me Kylo, not you…
Yeah, one night that obviously meant more to me than it did to you…
Do you have any idea how long I've…
I've been waiting a very, very long time for this moment, Love…
Don't call me Kylo…
Don't call me Kylo…
Don't call me Kylo…
Ben's voice echoes in her ears over and over, until finally she decide she have to make it stop. She throws herself forward and pressing her lips against Poe's. She kissed him, closed mouthed kisses, but passionate ones. He stands there and doesn't move to touch or kiss her back. But she kissed him anyway.
She just wanted everything about Kylo Ren to go ,Poe, please make him go away…
Rey start to slow down when she realize he's not going to kiss her back. Now they're embarrassed beyond belief and sad that they've ruined a good thing. Rey knew it was good when she had it before, but she still threw it away. How stupid does that make her?
"Okay then,"
She mumble to herself , but she was close enough to Poe that he hears her. Rey pulled away slowly, her eyes looking everywhere but at him—and definitely not at any of the people who've been standing around watching them.
She took a step back. Another. Another… Rey turn and walk away. Wow, so this is what rock bottom feels like. Rose won't talk to her, Fin disappointed in her, and now Poe won't forgi—
She did not t finish her train of thought. She was swung around by her wrist, and a warm mouth crashes against hers. It's not a slow kiss. It's fast and sloppy, but it's real, and it's Poe. She kissed him back with fervor and wrapped her arms around his neck.
"I'm sorry." she breathed in between kisses and gasps for air.
She can't stop, she can't pull away. She was wrapped up in him, and she feel great and safe and happy and… relieved. So, so relieved.
"I'm sorry, too," he says and grabs her face with his hands to slow her down. "Rey …" His tone makes her pause. "I promise we will never leave each other, okay?"
Rey was all too aware of her swollen lips and fast-beating heart, "I can't promise not to overreact sometimes." she shrug guiltily. "It's a hard habit to kick."
He chuckles and leans over to loudly smack a kiss on her lips. "You're really fucking adorable, baby. You know that?"
Rey blink up at him and give a coy smile. "I do now."she laugh softly. "Can we eat outside? I just want to be alone with you." her fingers playing with his hair.
"Want me to find Rose and Fin—?"
"No." Rey shake her head. "Just you."
He grins widely. "Sounds perfect."
While they walk to the lunch line to get their food, Rey cannot help but feel a little, giddy tingle inside of her
Poe meant well. He was trying to take care of her. That's what she need. Someone to take care of her broken self. Rose can't do that forever, and she is not strong enough to do it herself .
Poe is perfect for the job because he doesn't yell unless it's justified, and he doesn't hit things when he's upset.
He's simple. He's Poe. He's safe .
He'd never hurt her like Kylo Ren could.
X_X
Step two is fulfilled, and step one needs to be complete before she can move on to step three –which is to be on her own damned person. Screw Hux and Angel and whoever else gives her shit about who she date or who is she best friends with. Why should she feel guilty about that?
She was feeling weird since Rose was absent. It was history period and Mr. Katta was telling about old games which were held in ancient times where guild participated. Suddenly her phone rang with shrill. She hadn't put it on silent.
Rose Calling…
She frown at her screen and wonder why she's calling her during class, when she knows she is in the middle of freaking class! But then she start to think that Rose isn't stupid, and if she's calling her in the middle of class, it's because it's a damned emergency, and now she was kind of freaking out.
Her phone rings again.
Rose Calling…
Mr. Katta walks towards her desk, and in a split second decision, Rey grabbed her phone, bag, books and once flawless reputation for perfect behavior… and start for the door.
Rey push the door open and rush outside. "This better be good, Rose," she answered her phone and almost drop everything in her hands, "because I might get suspended for this."
Rose doesn't answer right away, but it's not on purpose. It's because she's crying so hard she can't breathe. "REY-REY," she sobs, "I n-need you t-to co-come get m-me."
"Okay," comes Rey's immediate answer, "I'm coming to get you. Where are you?" she ask as she stumble down the hall towards the parking lot.
"Avaz," she hiccups. "At the women's cl-clinic."
Her stomach drops to the floor.
"Why are you there, Rose?" Rey gulp.
"Why do you t-think, Rey ?" she screams at her. "Just c-come get m-me!"
Her words cause Rey's feet to start moving again. "Okay, I'll be there. Wait for me. Stay on the phone with me."
"No, j-just focus on g-getting h-here. I just w-want to be alone ri-right now." In their entire friendship, Ray had never heard her sound so miserable. Not even when her grandfather died last year, and they'd been close. She commands Rey not to tell a soul where she going, not even Poe or Fin.
When they hang up, Rey hurry out into the parking lot and search for her car. She was running up and down the aisles, and she can't find it. Why the hell can't she find her car? Her ankle is starting to ache from her sprint, and that's when it hits her.
Her dad hasn't given her car keys back. They have even argued over it this morning, resulting in his finally relenting and saying she could have it back next week. She hate being dropped off like a child and picked up like a latchkey kid, especially since Shiro has been the one to pick her twice so far this week.
Rey stop walking and stand in the middle of the parking feel like there's a light bulb that's been switched on over her head.
Shiro!I never erased his number from her phone. Rey don't know why, but in this moment she was so grateful that she didn't. She scramble for her phone and dial him—and then she hang up. What the hell? Why on earth would she think Shiro would help her? It's not like they parted with hugs last night.
But then again, they didn't part with name calling either. She have no one else to call. No one else would come. She knew Shiro enough to know that despite everything, he'll still come when she need him.
Rey at least know that after their talk last night. Before she can dial him again, her phone goes off, and Shiro's name flashes across her screen.
"Shiro!" she cried in relief. "Oh my gosh, I really didn't know if you would answer. Well, I knew you would answer, but I didn't know if you help me. But you called, so I'm hoping you will help me. I need a ride. I need—"
"Since when are you and Shiro friends again?"
Kylo spits out, and the blood melts away from her face. "And why call Shiro when you could ask your little bitch boyfriend?"
Her chest tightens, and her eyes sting with tears of frustration. "I can't do this with you, Kylo. I need help, I need Shiro. Why do you have his phone? Give him the phone, Kylo ,please. I'm begging you."
He sighs, "Where are you?"
"School." she chewing her bottom lip.
"Where do you need to go?" He sounds calmer now, like he's about to take control of the situation. Rey was not sure how that's supposed to make her feel. But what she felt is a fraction of the weight on her shoulders lifting after listening his voice.
"Avaz," Rey told him.
She heard a bell ring somewhere on his end and then a flutter of activity. "Stay where you are. I'm going to text you in a few minutes so you have my number."
"But Shiro—"
"I jacked his phone as a prank. He doesn't have to know," he explains to her. "Just sit tight, and I'll be there in a bit."
He hangs up.
X_X
She was jumpy. Her knee keeps bouncing, and she was chewing on her fingernails. She felt guilty because it's been a half hour since Rose called her, and she still sitting at school. She had texted her about the new developments without actually telling her the details.
Rey heard his engine before she sees his car. She was up and on her feet in seconds, jogging down the street to the corner. Her bag is super heavy with her books because she didn't get the chance to dump them in her locker before she charged outside like Xena Warrior Princess. When he rolls to a stop a few feet away from her, Rey felt her heart hammering away in her chest. Her stomach fills with the flutter of butterfly wings, and her skin tingles with the anticipation of his touch. It's involuntary, she swear.
When his doors click and unlock, Rey wasted no time jumping inside. "Thanks," she breathe. He nods his head and turns the car around to start for the highway. This is when she placed a hand on his knee, and he tenses up as she replied genuinely, "Really, Ben. Thank you."
Rey watched his Adam's apple move up and down in his throat as he swallows. His fingers clench around the wheel. "Yeah," he mumbles and slowly turns his head towards her. "Next time just call me. Don't call anyone else."
Before she can respond, his focus is back on the road, and he turns the stereo on. Rey slowly started to remove her hand from his leg, and like a paperweight on a wind blown piece of paper, his hand slaps down over her to anchor it in place.
Rey gasp in surprise as his fingers flex over her, and he links their hands together. She hate the way her body responds to him. Her heart picks up speed, her breathing quickens, her hands shake, and her knees lock together to keep her from rubbing her thighs against each other to get some friction.
"Ben," she pant and try to slip her hand free from his. "I can't… you know we…" Rey shake her head and bunch herself into a ball in his seat. She rested her chin on her knees and wrapped her arms around them. "I thought you were here to help me," she mumble.
He chuckles. "Doesn't mean I can't help myself, too babe."
"Please don't make this hard for me, Ben. You know I'm with Poe." she buried her face in her knees.
"For now," he grunts and turns up the volume so that the music in the car drowns out anymore possible conversation.
They continue like this all the way to the Avaz medical plaza where the women's clinic is held. It's here that Rose was schedule to abort her pregnancy, and Rey was guessing she's really upset about going through with it, but she is ready to be there for her and let her know she's done the right thing. She's too young to be a mother; she has too much potential in her future.
When Ben parks in the lot and kills the engine, Rey turn to him swiftly. "Ben," she begin while staring into his eyes, "Can you promise me something?"
He blinks once and tries to look away, but he fails and ends up clasping his hand over her. "That's a loaded question, Love." He exhales a breath of cinnamon. "What is it?"
"I need your silence," she tell him. "I need to know that I can trust you not to ask questions or tell anyone about this."
He looks at me with concern. "Who would I tell?"
She gulp. "I have a feeling you might feel the need to…"
She licked her lips and try to think of a good way to say what she suspect needs to be said. She don't want to admit it out loud, but the signs are all there. And if what she was thinking is true, then Rose is going to flip out when she sees that Kylo is the one who drove her here. Kylo will be the one to take them home. Kylo will be the one caught between two… friends?
"What am I to you, Ky-Ben?" Rey cleared her throat to try and mask her mistake.
But of course, he's caught it. She wait for him to say something about her slip and surprised when he doesn't. He just slides his arm across the back of her seat and uses his thumb to push a strand of hair behind her ear. "What do you want to be to me, baby?" he asks softly.
"I…" Rey pause and blink a few times, feeling confused. She wanted to ask him all sorts of questions, but now is not the time. "I want us to be friends." she gently take his hand away from her face and set it down between them.
He sighs and picks his hand up to rub it over his face. "Fine," he mutters. "For now," he adds with his eyes boring deeply into her.
Rey decide to take his hand between her and pull it to her chest. "Please tell me I can trust you with this, Ben. Please."
He gulps loudly and licked his lips. "You can trust me, Rey. I promise."
Rey jump forward to hug him, and as she pull him to her, she moved her mouth to his ear and whisper, "Please remember you said that."
X_X
She's not where she said she'd be when Rey finally come across her. She has been walking up and down and all around the damned building. Rey expected to find her right outside, and instead she find her across the street on a bench in the park. She looks like a frail old lady, hidden inside an extra large gray sweatshirt that she has wrapped over her bent knees.
At the moment, she's throwing crumbs from a small Cheez-It bag for the pigeons to feast on. She's the definition of melancholy, and it makes Rey's chest hurt to see her this way. She took a step toward her and turned her head to look over at the parking lot, where she knew Ben is waiting patiently. She was asking far too much of him, and she is taking advantage of the phantom hold she seem to have over him. She feel guilty, but not guilty enough to regret what she's done.
Another strep in Rose's direction, and her worn, black Converse crunch down on a twig, causing it to crack in the air like the pop of a firecracker. It startles the birds that trot around where Rose's feet should be, and a few of them fly away quickly, leaving behind a fluttering trail of feathers. Rey start to walk faster toward her because the element of surprise is now over.
"Hey," she call out and slow down her pace until she is standing right in front of her.
She refuses to look up from the bag of crackers in her hands. "Hey," she mumbles.
Rey sit down on the bench beside her and grab the crackers from her hands, tossing them into the trash beside the bench. "It was Kato Ren, right?" Rey ask as she turn her face to the sky. They won't be able to get through this conversation if they look at each other.
Rey saw her slight and shameful nod in her peripheral vision. She don't know how to respond, so she didn't. She's disappointed, but she's be a hypocrite to say so. Rey has her own version of Kato waiting in the parking lot a few yards behind them.
"You did the right thing, Rose." Rey turned her face to stare into her eyes when she said this. "Don't you dare feel guilty about it."
Her eyes squeeze shut, and she starts to cry silently. "I didn't." She hiccups, and
Rey know she's going to sob soon.
"You didn't what?" Rey ask quickly; she need her to talk as much as she can before she's unable to. "You didn't what, Rose?" Rey shake her slightly.
Big tearful Brown eyes glance up at her. "I didn't go through with it. I couldn't go through with it…" she gasps and presses a hand to her mouth before falling to pieces.
In her shock, Rey don't think to pull her to herself and give her comfort. As the best friend, that's her job. She know it is, and she is usually all for it. But she can't believe this. She can't even begin to understand why the hell she'd decide to continue an accidental pregnancy with Kato Ren of all fucking people!
She's livid! At him, at her ,and at this unborn… thing! This will ruin her! She's smart and beautiful, and she's supposed to grow up and get the hell out of here. They were supposed to get out of here. They were supposed to go to University some other snobby college. They were supposed to get their degrees in Journalism and then open up their own Review magazine so that they can openly talk shit about everyone! How are they supposed to do anything if there is a baby in the picture?
"Rey," Rose whimpers, and instinct kicks in. Instantaneously, Rey put everything on hold and reach out to pull her to her side so that she can wrap her arms around her. She's fragile and vulnerable, and she wants her to grab her and hold her and tell her that everything is going to be all right.
But Rey doesn't know that. How can she?
You, me, and a baby makes three ,Rose-Bud!
Rey tightly squeeze her to herself and kiss the top of her head. They stayed in this embrace until her back pocket buzzes. Rey know it's Ben, so she ignore it, and for a few more minutes they sit in silence, Rose and Rey .
Eventually, Rey know she was starting to push her luck with Ben's patience, so she move to stand, and she take a deep breath as she do. This is going to take some serious coaxing on her part to get Rose into Ben's car.
"Okay." Rey nibble the inside of her cheek. "So… don't freak out, but—"
Her loud snort and eye roll make her smirk and roll her eyes back at her. Yeah, don't freak out even more than you already are, Rose, she thought. Rey shook her head and take a quick glance in Ben's direction. If she don't hurry up, he might come over here, and then shit will hit the fan.
"Okay, so you know how I told you Clarissa drove me here?" Rey ask her and stare at her shoes, which suddenly fascinate her like nothing else. She doesn't respond, so she look up and see her nod her head with a concerned look on her face. She knows this is leading to undesirable information.
"Well…" Rey go right back to chewing on the inside of her cheek until it's almost raw. "I kinda… lied." she close her eyes open them slowly to see what kind of reaction she has.
It's so much worse than she expected because when Rey look at her, her eyes are wide, and her mouth is hanging open. She's staring over her shoulder in sheer panic, and her hands are clenching and unclenching around the fabric of her sweater. Rey don't need to turn around to know why she looks like that. She has reached the end of Kylo Ren's patience.
And she saw angry kylo approaching both of them