PART 4

The fireworks led the way to the palatial-like home of the Martin family. Nicholas, the eldest son, had managed to slip away from the festivities, followed by Beth Roberts.

"Do you love her?" Beth's brown eyes looked up to meet Nicholas' blue green eyes.

Sighing, he stepped away from her. It was his engagement party and rather than being with his wife to be, Nicholas chose to be with Beth. The two had somehow ended up in the gardens walking through the labyrinth that stood proudly on his family's property.

"Answer me." Beth demanded as she reached out and stopped Nicholas from moving farther away from her.

He crossed his arms and looked down at her, annoyed with the turn the conversation had taken. At first it was to reminisce about the path that history took with them two at the helm. They'd known each other since they were children and somewhere along the way, Nicholas had fallen in love with Beth. She'd always seemed to be oblivious to his advances. One night he broke down and tried to conquer Beth's heart. He was left with nothing more than confusion and heart ache. That was when he decided to court Ellen. If he couldn't be happily in love with Beth, then he was going to have to be happy in learning to love Ellen. "What is it that you want?"

Beth closed the gap between them. "What I want most is to never lose you."

"You aren't going to lose me." He knew he was lying to her. How could two women that hated each other ever be friends? He knew that Ellen stomached Beth only for his sake, but that would eventually change.

She took his hand once they arrived at the end of the labyrinth. "You have someone that will always love you."

"And you have someone that loves you." Once his eyes locked on hers, he knew there was no turning back. Leaning in, he kissed her. It was supposed to be a friendly kiss but ended up being passionate and heated. It was Nicholas who pulled away and stared at Beth with a bewildered expression. So this is what it was like to kiss Beth Roberts.

"We're getting too good at saying goodbye." Nicholas said, his hand still holding on to Beth's.

Beth was speechless. All she could do to stop herself from breaking down was to look away from his intense gaze. Even then, she felt his radiating heat. She wanted to be consumed by him, devoured, cherished . . . loved. But she lost the chance to be Mrs. Nicholas Martin and she would never get that chance back.

At her lack of response, Nicholas realized that everything ended. Sadly, he walked away from her not realizing that Ellen had watched their "goodbyes" from the balcony directly above them. Not more than ten minutes passed before he heard the sounds of an argument emanating from the gardens.

When Nicholas arrived, he found Ellen and Beth in some sort of argument. Beth was trying to keep calm but Ellen was shouting obscenities at her. The guests of the engagement party were all outside watching the "battle" take place. When Nicholas rushed over to break the two up, he didn't notice Ellen unsheathe a dagger, but he felt as the point of the blade went straight through his abdomen, doubling him over.

Ellen stood by, frozen by the sight before her. Nicholas was bleeding heavily and Beth, always the one person who he could count to be by his side, was holding him. Her soothing words made him forget the pain and the world around him. It was the least that she could do for him. In reality she would do so much more. "Nicholas, I need you to know something." She said, between the tears that were spilling from her eyes and onto him. Beth closed her eyes and held tighter to his still form. "I love you." But it was their last chance and right there, Nicholas slipped away forever. He didn't hear her words.

1920 Zulu

JAG Headquarters

Falls Church, Virginia

Harm knew how much Mac hated people barging in through her office door, but he was too tired to remember formalities. "Mac, I need to talk to you."

"Don't you knock?" She was going to tease him about it, but caught the worried look on is face. "Sit down."

Harm nodded. "Thanks." Dinner the night before had helped them talk about a few of the things that had been bothering the both of them since their South American trip. Through more things needed to be said, Paraguay was the main thing that needed to be put to bed. After dinner, they went to the steps of the Lincoln Memorial, the two of them spoke about the Singer case, Harm's time in the brig and Mattie Grace. The only thing that wasn't touched was the tabled conversation about their relationship. They both figured that was something that would take more than one evening to resolve. Mac was hoping he would bring it up and, truthfully, Harm was scared to death to even start.

Taking a deep breath he just stared at her, not sure where to begin. She'd told him in Paraguay that she was superstitious but didn't let on, hopefully that was the truth.

Mac just looked back at him. "Well? What's wrong?"

"Do you ever have strange dreams that make you think there is a reason you had them?" He blurted out.

Mac shrugged. "Sometimes, I guess." Sometimes in her own dreams, she would see him in other forms but it was still him. He was always there. If the word "soulmate" had a meaning, it was for her and the man sitting across from her now. If only he would realize the same thing.

"Ok, good. . .because I keep having these . . ." He paused, trying to find a tactful way to tell Mac that he was probably losing his marbles.

"Dreams?" She finished for him and took a breath. "I have too. . and uh. . . you're in all of them." She said shyly.

Harm looked around, seemingly nervous. She was dreaming of him and he was dreaming of her. There was some story here and one that they needed to sort out. Suddenly, Harm had a sense that something was very very wrong. "We need to talk then."

"Yes we do." Mac agreed. "Come to my place tonight around nine."

"I haven't been there in a while." He said with a smile.

Mac returned the smile and sighed happily. "Well you are welcomed to drop by at anytime."

PART 5

0315 Zulu

Mac's Apartment

Washington, DC

"You're fifteen minutes late, squid." She said, opening the door and taking the bag of take out of Harm's hands.

Harm shook his head. "Would you rather that I be early with no food or late with food?"

Walking over to her table, she placed the bag down and rummaged through it. "Hmm. . . good question. . . I'll take the latter."

"I figured as much." Taking off his coat, Harm made it into her kitchen, grabbing plates and two glasses. Mac followed and grabbed two Coke's from her fridge.

Settling down, Harm pulled out all of the contents of the bag and slid two of the cartons over to Mac. "Noodles and Beef for you. . . Veggies and Tofu for me."

Mac made a face when he mentioned the word "tofu." Happy to have a good meal in her system, she opened up the cartons and spilled some of the contents onto her plate. "Dunno how you eat that stuff but let's make a deal from here on out."

Harm took a bit of his food and nodded. "I'm listening."

"You don't poke fun at my grease covered junk food and I won't poke fun at your health nut craze." Reaching her hand across to him, she smiled when he took it. Another deal had been made. "And I know you'll keep that promise."

Harm nodded. "I will." Opening both of their Cokes, he poured the contents into each of their glasses. "So, in order to save time. . . where should we start this convo?"

"You approached me about the dreams, so I think you should go first." She didn't mind putting him in the spotlight. Admittedly, she didn't know where to start. It wasn't uncommon for her to have some strange dreams. It was even less uncommon for her to dream about Harm, but she felt something in the last dream that felt all too real.

"Well." He began, swallowing a bit of food. "The first one was weird." Noting his comment, he paused a moment and shook his head. The first one? Try both of them. "Okay. . . well they both were weird. . . You weren't really in the first one. . . It was more like memories."

Mac raised her eyebrows. "Care to clarify?"

"It was. . . Medieval times or something. I was a peasant named Michael and was in a sword fight with a noble named Richard"

She was surprised at this. If Harm was in medieval times, he would surely be the knight in shinning armor. "Funny, I pictured you more as the knight slaying the dragon to get the princess or something."

"Me too. . . What's really weird is that I, uh. . . Michael was fighting . . . Umm. . . Richard who was Mic." He looked away from her as he mentioned the name. When she didn't say a thing about it, he looked up at her, feeling sorry that he even brought up this discussion. "I'm sorry, Mac."

"No, it's fine. . . not like we can actually control what we dream. . . Go on." She urged as she took a few bites of her food.

After sipping more Coke, Harm cleared his throat. "Okay. . .We were sword fighting and Richard is yelling to Michael something about his wife loving him. . . I. . I mean Michael gets stabbed by Richard and as he is dying he recalls meeting Marie-Ellen. . . You." Harm said, taking a breath. "And he dies."

"Marie-Ellen? Marie-Ellen." Mac said, trying to see if that name made her feel anything. "Can't say I see myself as a Marie-Ellen, but I am open for suggestions. . . What about the second dream?"

Grinning, Harm continued. "Well that one sort of mirrored something that did happen not that long ago. . ."

Mac watched him fight his thoughts as he tried to formulate a way to put things. "Okaaay. . ."

"During your engagement party." Harm said, unsurely, noticing that she was going to let him continue. "Okay. . . Beth Roberts and Nicholas Martin. . . that is who we were. He was getting married and she was talking to him. . . trying to figure if he loved Ellen . . or well.. Ellen was Renee." Pausing for a moment, he decided it was better to just spill everything out. "Beth and Nicholas kiss after she says something about never wanting to lose him. . . Ellen saw the kiss and she and Beth fight. Nicholas gets stabbed by Ellen and Beth is the one that stays by him as he dies."

"That's twice that you died." Mac said with a frown. Even during the times when she was purely angry at Harm, she never wanted to see him dead. That would have been too much for her to bare.

Harm nodded. "And twice that I felt some connection to the dream. . ."

Stretching, Mac leaned back into her chair. "I was a . . ." Sighing she took a breath and blushed as she recalled exactly who and what she was in her dreams. " . . . a courtesan. . . you know like a umm. . . high paid prostitute."

His eyebrow raised questioningly at the notion. Mac a prostitute? Never. "A prostitute? I find that hard to believe."

"Well. . ." Mac shrugged and continued. "She was in the inquisition tried as a witch for bewitching the rich men. But there was one guy named Lorenzo that she had an affair with and they apparently remained close." Close wasn't the appropriate words. They had been lovers and even in her dream Mac could sense the otherworldly intimacy between them. "She was burned to death."

Harm held his breath. "So you died. . . and Lorenzo was me?"

Mac nodded. "Yea."

"I don't get this. . . I really don't." He said, after remaining silent for a few minutes. If it wasn't because I was so difficult to believe, he would continue his thought of them being past lives. But things like that weren't possible, were they?

"At the risk of sounding totally ludicrous. . . Maybe we ARE remembering past lives?" Mac said, sitting up straight on the chair.

"But why? And why are both of us going through it?" He was a firm believer in the fact that things happened for a reason. What the reasons were, sometimes he never knew, but it was better than believing that people lived day in and out in a mundane existence.

"I don't know, Harm"

Angrily, he stood up and paced. "Well. . . I need to find out."

Remaining silent, she just looked at him. Though she'd seen Harm angry before, his current look worried her. He looked like a madman on the verge of going over the edge. "Harm. . ." She said cautiously and watched as his figure slumped back into the chair. "Why is this so important? And give me the truth."

"Because things aren't over between us, Mac. . . there are things that we've recently said in friendship and even in anger and makes me believe that our time hasn't passed." Harm watched Mac for a moment, he'd apparently left her speechless. "Please tell me that I am not the only one amazed that, even when things are against us, we find a way back to each other. . .that is just surreal."

Mac opened her mouth to speak, but it took her a few moments before her brain could formulate anything. "I. . . well, yea it's. . . strange I guess." Stammering, she managed to ask a question that had been looming over her since he walked back into JAG ops. "What do you want from me?"

"You. . . just you." He said quickly, not even hesitating one moment. He'd gone over lines in his mind for months. Something inside of him kept a shred of hope alive. Even when it was ludicrous that he was still thinking of Mac in a romantic fashion, he kept some belief that there was something more. She may have wanted to call it quits, but he would sit back and wait for the right time to give it a go again. "I want you, Sarah. . . This might not be the time, or place, hell, it may not be the lifetime, but I want you. . . and I don't want to wind up like Nicholas or Michael. . . I don't want to lose you." He didn't realize the tear streaming down his cheek, until he moved forward to brush away her own. She too moved her hand over his face and brushed away the tear that had slid out.

Mac shivered at having him so close to her personal space. For a moment, they both sat like that, close to another. Their hands had slid down and Harm was holding hers in his own. She drowned in his sea green eyes, realizing that, the secret to Harmon Rabb Jr. had always lied there. Why didn't she read that from him that night in Paraguay? Parting her lips, she waited in anticipation for the kiss that they were going to share a night earlier.

Harm too was drowning in Mac. His eyes maintaining a vigil over her chocolate depths. Softly he brushed his lips against hers and felt a thrill when she didn't push away. Just as softly, he placed his lips fully on her own and the memories of a night lost on the Admiral's porch vanished only to be replaced by a new sensation.

Mac deepened the kiss brushing a bit harder against his mouth. She parted her own as she felt his tongue request entrance. Once it received clearance, he timidly moved closer to her as their tongues dueled in an ancient dance designed to carry it's participants away.

"God if this is a dream, please don't let it end." Mac said, with her head thrown back and eyes closed. He was now kissing her neck, seemingly intrigued by a particular spot that caused her to shiver all over.

Grinning he stopped and looked at her as she slowly opened her eyes. "I was thinking the same thing." Harm said softly and then resumed his musings on that spot on her neck.

Mac sighed happily into his mouth as they were kissing again, each time bringing the fire into a roaring inferno.

Standing up, Harm stood Mac up and effortlessly picked her up and carried her into the bedroom. She was completely lost in him by the time that she realized he had laid her down on the bed. Between kisses, Harm had managed to pull her shirt off and with three quick motions, slid the jeans off her body.

Pulling himself from her, he stood up and took off his own shirt and pants. Before returning to her, he stopped for a moment and watched Mac. She was so sexy and so very beautiful as she lay in her bed wearing a black lace panty and bra set.

Sighing she looked up at him and saw the smirk that graced his lips. A moment later, her arms were wrapped around him as his mouth searched for her own. Breaking away slightly she looked into his eyes. "Make love to me." She stated, making it sound like a cross between a request and down right pleading.

Harm didn't say a word, he merely acted by loving her body with his own.

Mac was on fire as she felt Harm place soft kisses down her neck. He brought his mouth down over her left breast, still covered in fabric, and began sucking. He felt her nipple harden and took delight in hearing Mac groan as he swirled his tongue over the fabric, around her nipple. She ran her hands through his hair holding him down to her. "Oh God, Harm!" Mac said, when Harm bit down softly.

Grinning, he moved his hands to her sides as Mac raised off the mattress allowing Harm to unclasp her bra. With two fingers, Harm snapped it lose, his mouth on her neck, nibbling. As the fabric came off of her body, Harm cupped her breasts, running his thumbs back and forth over her nipples. He loved the way that her body reacted to him. He loved seeing the goose bumps all over her.

Harm's hands continued the exploration on Mac's body as he removed the last piece of fabric off her waist and to the floor. He settled his body next to hers and looked deeply into Mac's eyes as his hand moved down between her breasts. His hand kept trailing down over her abdomen, her belly button and right above her mound where Harm stopped. Seeing her eyes close and her head thrown back in anticipation, he saw that as the acceptance that he needed. Harm moved his hand between Mac's thighs. His index finger brushed over her clit making Mac gasp. He continued his brushing until he felt her bud become erect. Then, his finger started rubbing at Mac's clit softly at first and then with more fervor as she responded to his touches. Harm watched at the expressions on her beautiful features. He moved his hand fully over her and inserted one finger into her while his thumb continued rubbing her swollen bud.

Biting her bottom lip, Mac felt her body start to tense up for the oncoming orgasm. It came a few seconds later in a series of staccato cries as Harm brought her over the edge. Seconds later, Harm parted her thighs and kneeled between, positioning himself. While Mac was still enjoying the tingling sensations over body, Harm slid deeply into her eliciting yet another gasp.

Mac's eyes were instantly open and greeted by Harm's intense sea-green gaze. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him down kissing him in ways that she hadn't with anyone before. It was then that he began thrusting in such a tantalizing way that her body was soon ready to go over the edge yet again. And she came nearly four times more before their coupling was concluded.

Harm held on to the sheets bellow them as he slid in and out of her and then held on as he exploded in his own climax. They stayed connected for quite a while longer before Harm untangled their bodies and lay next to Mac, spooning her against him. It felt so right for them to be together. But, the fates were already planning their next move against the lovers.