A/N Happy New Year! I hope it's a wonderful year for us all!
Let's see, oh yeah, we had some honesty and some kissing going on :) It's another busy chapter, but let's start on the sofa with our couple.
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He couldn't quite believe what was happening, he needed to look at her sweet face.
He drew back only enough to search her pretty blue eyes as his finger softly traced along the curve of her jaw. His voice was barely audible when he whispered, "Beth…"
Her fingers slowly brushed back the hair that always seemed to fall in his eyes and she whispered back, "Daryl I…"
He spoke again, he had to make himself talk. He had to tell her. He wasn't letting another day go by without letting her know, "I got a lotta feelins for ya Beth. I don't even understand em. I just…I wanna be with ya all the time and when I ain't with ya, I'm thinkin' about ya. It's been like this since the first time I seen ya, it just keeps gettin' stronger."
Her hand softly caressed his cheek as she smiled and agreed, "I know, I know. I feel the same about you."
She didn't understand why it would be that way but her words seemed to startle him, "Really? Ya sure?"
"Daryl, of course I'm sure."
That was the end of the talking. His hand tenderly clutched her neck and his kisses were deep, filled with both the warmth of his emotion and his need for her.
He was still kissing her as he slowly, gradually lay her back on the sofa and he lay next to her. Their bodies were pressed close as his fingers wove through her soft blonde hair. He took his time as he kissed her forehead, her nose, her chin, her ears and finally whispered, "You n me Beth? Ya sure?"
"I'm sure."
It was he who woke sometime in the night. His arms still wrapped around her and her head nestled in his chest. He hated to wake her but she needed to get in the bed where it was warmer and softer, "Beth. Darlin', wake up, c'mon, come ta bed."
Her eyes opened and he could see she was disoriented, he cradled her cheek and kept his voice soft and low, "We fell asleep on the sofa. C'mon, it's best ya get in bed."
He walked her in his room, she slipped into bed and he pulled the covers up over her. He bent to kiss her cheek, whispered, "'Night Beth," and turned to go.
She quickly reached out and clasped his hand, "Wait. Where are you going? Aren't you going to stay with me?"
He told himself it was that she was half asleep and must not know what she was saying. "Beth…" but she'd pulled the covers back inviting him in. But no, no. Not Beth. She didn't mean it the way he wished she did.
He quickly removed his jeans, slipped into his pajama bottoms and crawled in next to her. He held her close as he whispered, "Ya feel so good in my arms Darlin'," he kissed her hair and the only sound she made was a contented, "mmm."
Just lying with her that way had him aroused, but he made no attempts with her. He wanted to, he wanted so badly to make love to her that night, but he was mindful of her innocence and the fact that she was still half asleep.
He also had strong thoughts of it being too soon, he wanted her to have time to really think it all through. Her feelings for him in that moment might only be because she was hurt, dependent, weak and not quite thinking straight.
There was something else on his mind as well. His responsibilities. He wouldn't let it go that far with Beth until he'd been honest with her about Mick and Mick's Mother. He didn't think he was quite ready to talk to her about all that yet, and he wasn't sure she was ready to hear it.
Back when it all happened, when he'd found out about Mick, he made a promise to himself that if he ever went that far with a woman again he would use protection. He hadn't had any reason to worry about it since then, and he had nothing like that in the house.
His thoughts seemed so jumbled, bouncing from thought to thought and none of them positive. He wasn't at all convinced that something good could happen with her, that any of this was really real. He wanted it to be. He hoped with all his heart that Beth would come to truly believe he was the one, and that they would take their feelings to that place. But his belief that he was unworthy ran so deep, he was certain she'd come to her senses and change her mind about him.
Still, as he lay there with her cradled in his arms, feeling the warmth of her small body and breathing in the sweet smell of her, he couldn't help but hope that it could be real.
She woke in the morning to find herself alone in his bed, but she knew where he was. She could smell breakfast cooking. She smiled as she pictured him there in front of the big stove, always with such a serious look and always taking care of her and Mick.
She promised herself that in just a couple of days, as soon as she was better, she'd be cooking for him. She would bake him bread and make a cake, fry him chicken and make a country gravy. He was such a good man and he deserved whatever little things she could do for him.
She rolled over on her back, a small smile on her face as she looked up at the ceiling and thought of the night before. Their kisses, the way he held her and the words that he said. She smiled knowing that all the things that happened between them were so much better than anything in those romance novels.
Then a dark cloud seemed to form over her. Why did he seem so unsure? Obviously he knew about love, marriage and all those things. He'd been married. He had a child. Maybe he was sort of attracted to her, but not that much. Not the kind of attraction that turns into love. Or maybe he was trying to have feelings for her, but he just couldn't because he wasn't over the pain of losing his his wife.
She'd almost worked herself into tears when Mick came running in the room, distracting her from her thoughts. The little girl jumped on the bed, so excited as she spoke, "Beth! You're awake! I'm starvin'. Are ya starvin'?"
Beth managed to laugh as she pulled the little girl into a hug and said, "As a matter of fact I am starving. I'd better get up and get ready for breakfast, it smells like Daddy's cooking something for us."
They walked in the kitchen and the only thing that kept him from going to her, taking her in his arms and kissing her the way he had the night before, was Mick. For now he would try hard to keep what was happening between him and Beth from his daughter. He'd wait until he was sure of Beth's feelings.
He'd done the thing he'd been so afraid to do, he'd taken the chance. He was risking his heart, but he wasn't willing to risk Mick's.
Still, that morning standing in the kitchen with Beth and his daughter, he craved something from the woman. Some sort of contact no matter how innocent. He settled on giving Mick a kiss and Beth a kiss on the cheek, "Mornin' ladies. I hope you're hungry cuz I made a lotta food."
The friendly little kiss wasn't quite enough. They sat for their breakfast and he reached under the table, took her hand and gave it a gentle squeeze, delighted when she looked in his eyes, smiled and squeezed back.
His mind was full of other thoughts as well. He needed to talk to Merle. Alone. He had to tell him what he'd heard from Rick and he needed to set a plan in motion. He didn't want Beth to know about it, but he also wasn't willing to tell her any outright lies.
He thought he had it figured out, and when the breakfast dishes were done he suggested, "I gotta take care of a couple things at the shop real quick. If ya feel like ya wanna take some time gettin' ready I can come back for ya after while."
She'd promised him and herself both she'd start taking things a little bit slower and she agreed, "I think I'd like to take a little time. Why don't you leave Mick here with me and come back when it's convenient? Would that be okay?"
It was perfect, "Sure, yeah, as long as ya don't mind keepin' her." Even though he hadn't lied to Beth he still felt guilty, like he was deceiving her in some way. He tried to make up for that as he gently clasped her arm, smiled and said, "Takin' it a little easier will do ya good, and thanks for keepin' Mick. I'll come back at lunch time and we can all go back ta the shop after we eat. How's that?"
She looked happy when she answered, "Mick will be good company, and yes, that would be wonderful. Maybe later, only if you have time of course, we could get my things from the sheriff's office. I can't wait to hold my Mama's cameo again."
She ran a hand over Mick's hair adding, "And I'd like to get my sewing machine back. I have some dresses to make for a very sweet school girl I know."
The way she was with Mick and how genuine it seemed, lightened the dark thoughts he'd been having. He smiled when he agreed, "Yeah, I'll knock off a little early this afternoon and we'll head over that way."
His eyes told her there was more he wanted to say, and she was pretty sure he wanted to kiss her just as much as she wanted to be kissed. He settled for giving her hand a quick squeeze and saying, "Yeah, I'm anxious for ya ta have your things back."
His brother was busy washing car windows and checking oil when Daryl pulled open the big shop door.
No matter how early he got to the shop he never seemed to beat Merle there. His brother didn't sleep much and he was always restless, needing something to keep him busy. They had a few customers who were also aware of Merle's ways and there were already two cars at the pumps.
He walked over toward his brother and without saying a word he finished up one of the vehicles while Merle did the other. Merle suspected something was going on and the minute the cars pulled away he said, "Alright brother, before another one shows up tell me what's on your mind."
Daryl told him everything he'd heard from Rick the night before. The first thing Merle said was, "C'mon in the office, lemme give Karen a quick call before she leaves for work. I'll ask her ta keep an ear ta the ground so we can find out when they're gonna move the bastard to Atlanta."
Daryl nodded and followed his brother into the office. As soon as Merle was off the call, with a promise from Karen she'd find out soon, Daryl told him, "I'ma kill the sumbitch Merle."
"No ya ain't little brother, I'ma kill him."
"Why the hell would you do it?"
"Cuz you got a woman and a little girl up at your house that need ya a lot more'n Karen needs me." He even laughed when he added, "Shit, I been tellin' that woman for years she'd be better off without me. If I went ta prison I'd finally be settin' her free."
"I ain't gonna let ya do what's mine ta do."
"Who says it's yours? I got just as much right ta kill a dirty mutherfucker as you do."
For some reason it made them both laugh and Daryl asked, "Ya ready ta settle this brother?"
"Yeah, I'm ready ta win again."
Merle flipped the coin and won the right to choose which arm they used. He picked the right one, the one with the hook. Daryl knew then he was about to lose. Over the years it was like Merle's body had compensated for the loss of part of the arm by making what remained so much stronger.
Daryl wasn't going to just giving up though, he was still determined. As they battled Merle kept up the banter as he joked, "We sure was raised up right, weren't we little brother? Here we are arm wrestlin' for the right ta kill a guy."
Daryl couldn't help laughing and that was that, Merle put his brother's hand down hard on the desk, then he grinned that big ol grin and said, "Hooray for me. I getta be the one who shoots his ass."
It was after all the b.s. talk and the arm wrestling shenanigans that they talked about what they were really going to do.
Beth and Mick got dressed for their day and Beth offered, "Do you want me to put your hair in Dutch braids Mick? They're so pretty. Then, maybe we should do a little reading and practice our letters." Mick didn't look too happy about reading and practicing, so Beth added, "If you work hard we can play piano later."
"Please, please, please! I wanna learn ta play like you Beth."
Beth sat on the sofa braiding Mick's hair and when it was done she told the little girl, "Oh my Michele Marie, you look as beautiful as your name sounds."
She'd just started down the hall to return the comb and brush to the bathroom when the telephone began to ring. The loud ringing startled her at first, and then she stood wondering whether or not she should answer. It wasn't her home, but then again, maybe it was Daryl calling to check on her and Mick. Maybe she'd better.
She picked up the receiver and held it to her ear, "Hello?"
"Good morning Bethie."
"Maggie, is everything okay?"
"Everything's fine. I'm calling to see how you are and ask if you want me to give you a ride to the sheriff's office. I was just on the phone with Rick and he said your things can be picked up any time."
"Oh good. Last night he said they'd be ready this afternoon and Daryl said he'd take me. He'd have to miss work though. Um, and I have Mick with me. Let me just call Daryl and make sure. I'll call you back."
Daryl picked up on the third ring, "Dixon's, can I help ya?"
"It's Beth."
"Hey, everythin' okay?"
"Yes, we're fine. It's just, well Maggie called and offered to take me to the sheriff's office to get my things, and I'm happy to take Mick with me. We won't be gone long, is that alright?"
He had just two concerns, "Maggie ain't one ta drive too fast or nuthin' is she?"
"No, she'll be good with me and Mick in the car."
He still wasn't quite sure how he felt about the whole idea, but he knew if he really wanted to be with Beth he was going to have to learn to trust her decisions. "Ya sure ya don't mind havin' Mick along?"
"No, it'll be just fine and when we get back we're going to play piano and rest."
"Okay then, well ya call me if there's trouble and I'll see ya for lunch, k?"
As if she'd read his earlier thoughts she answered, "Yes, but there won't be trouble, and thank you for trusting me."
"I do trust ya Beth. I just worry is all."
She smiled to herself yes, she knew how he was. He worried about her and Mick all the time. "Thank you for always being concerned for us Daryl. I promise we'll be fine." Then she teased, "As Mick would say, you're gonna see we are."
She made him smile and the humor did help ease his mind, "Yeah, alright. Call me when ya get back."
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When Maggie got off the phone with Rick she was fit to be tied, and Abraham heard all about it as she ranted and raved for at least thirty minutes. She wasn't mad at him, she was just mad. His problem was, when Maggie was unhappy she made his life downright miserable. There was much more to it this time though. He hated any asshole that preyed on women.
He puffed on his big old cigar while he made up his mind, there was a shit storm waiting for that mother dick and it was going to be delivered by Abraham Ford himself. All he said to Maggie about his plan was, "Hey Dumplin', see what you can find out about this transfer they got planned. I might wanna observe that."
Maggie didn't waste any time getting to Daryl's place, her, Beth and Mick were on their way within 15 minutes.
Beth hadn't known quite what to expect when she got to the station to claim her property. She was relieved to discover she didn't have to walk through the whole sheriff's station to get to the property room, it was close to the entry. No matter how many times everyone told her she looked just fine, she was so self-conscious about her face.
Once in the property room all she had to do was match the items they had to her original list and descriptions. As she did the deputy looked on and verified each item as hers, she signed the paper and her things were officially returned.
She picked up her purse and the jewelry box, showed Mick the cameo and smiled, "It was my Mama's, isn't it so pretty?"
"You should wear that all the time Beth, it's too pretty ta just keep it in a box." Beth smiled at the little girl's notion, out of the mouths of babes she thought, and she pinned it to the collar of her blouse
She carried only her handbag and the jewelry box and held Mick's hand. Maggie and Rick insisted on carrying her other things.
When they were back in the car Beth absentmindedly opened the handbag and slid the thin golden zipper of a small interior pocket open. She'd always referred to it as her secret hiding place and sure enough, tucked within it was the ten-dollar bill, neatly folded into an impossibly tiny square, that she kept hidden for emergencies.
The idea came to her immediately and she asked Maggie, "Can we stop at my apartment and pick up my sewing box, pretty please?" Then another thought came and she was so disappointed when she said, "Oh wait, never mind. The lock's been changed."
Maggie glanced over with a smile, "Yes and your landlord gave me the new key."
Beth and Mick waited in the car while Maggie ran in, returned the radio to its usual spot and retrieved the sewing box. When her sister got back in the car Beth smiled sweetly and asked, "Can we stop at Penny's? Pretty please?"
"Sure if you want, what do you suddenly need at Penny's?"
"I want to get some dress fabric for Mick. I made a trade with Daryl, he fixed my car and I'm going to make Mick new dresses for school."
Maggie turned in her seat and smiled at Mick, "You're in for a nice treat Mick, no one is a better dressmaker than Bethie. You'll have the prettiest dresses of any girl at school."
The little girl smiled back and said, "Beth does everythin' just right and she's gonna teach me how ta sew too Maggie. I'ma make my Daddy a handychief!"
"That's real nice Mick, I'm sure your Daddy's gonna love it."
Then Beth remembered, "Wait, I can't go to Penny's. People are gonna see me and I look so terrible."
Before Maggie could speak a small voice from the back asked, "How many times I gotta tell ya Beth? You're the prettiest girl in the whole world."
Maggie smiled and headed to JC Penny.
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At noon he walked in his house to find Beth and Mick both standing at the big work table in the kitchen, Mick perched on her chair. He felt himself grin at the sight of this woman and his daughter. The fabric laid out on what was supposed to be his work table, the thin paper pattern pinned to yellow fabric with little flowers all over it, and Beth cutting away while Mick watched intently.
Beth looked up from her work, her eyes big and full of concern, "Oh no, we've been so busy the time got away from me. I'm sorry."
He kissed Mick on top of her head and Beth on the check and said, "I tell ya what, you ladies finish up what you're doin' there and I'll get lunch. Ham sandwiches sound alright?"
"That sounds wonderful, but gosh, I wanted to surprise you with lunch."
"Don't worry girl, you surprised me plenty. While we eat you can tell me how all this came about."
Over lunch he listened and nodded as she told him all about their morning, the money she found in her handbag, stopping by her place, going to Penny's. He just kept listening and nodding and when she was finished he scooted his chair back, stood and slipped a hand in his back pocket, removing his wallet. He opened it, took out a ten-dollar bill and handed it to her.
"No Daryl, it's part of our trade. We both have our jobs to do and my job is to make Mick's dresses for school."
"That's right, and you're makin' dresses. But I ain't lettin' ya pay for that material, and them buttons and zippers and all whatever that other stuff is."
She could tell by his tone he'd never change his mind, but still she tried, "Well it doesn't seem right. I know there are parts and things you have to put in my car, and those things cost money."
He shrugged and said, "Ya ain't payin'," and she knew, that, was that.
After lunch he sent Mick to wash up and use the bathroom, "Nap time for you."
The little girl tried to argue, "But Daddy I gotta help Beth, she said I'm her helper."
"She ain't gonna need your help cuz she's gonna be takin' a nap too. Now get goin', I'll be right there."
The minute Mick was out of the room his hands were gently but firmly grasping Beth's hips. There was no talk, he was too busy kissing her. As he drew his lips back he smiled, "Been waitin' ta do that all day."
She smiled too, "I've been hoping all day for you'd kiss me again."
He looked more serious as he ran a finger along the curve of her face and said, "I meant what I said ta Mick, ya need ta lay down Beth. You remember how bad ya felt yesterday?"
She looked down as she nodded her head and answered, "Yes."
"Alright then, rest a little. Ain't nuthin' you gotta do that won't wait."
He had thoughts, things he wanted to talk to her about, things he wanted to ask her. But this wasn't the time. As began to walk up the stairs to check on Mick the phone rang, he hurried back down and answered. The voice on the other end of the line asked, "Is this Daryl Dixon?"
"Yeah it's him, who's this?"
"This is Dr. Edward's office. The doctor needs to follow up your wife's care. He'd like you to bring her in for a check up Friday morning. He'll decide then if she can be released for work."
"Yeah, okay, what time?"
"Can you have her here at nine?"
"Yeah, I'll have her there then. Thanks."
His stomach hurt. He wanted her to see the doctor. He wanted to know everything was alright. What he didn't like thinking about was her going back to work. Everything just seemed so much better having her there at the house with him and Mick.
He put Mick down for a nap and by the time he was downstairs again Beth was already under the big quilt. He lay down next to her, his arm around her as he kissed her blonde hair and whispered, "I knew you was tired."
"You're right, it hit me and I just had to lay down."
"Your body's tellin' ya what ya need, listen to it and rest. The doc called too, I gotta have ya there Friday mornin' at nine."
"I could ask Maggie to take me."
"You could, and she would, but I'm takin' ya. I wanna hear for myself what the man has ta say."
Her eyes looked heavy, like she was barely holding them open as she placed her hand on his cheek and whispered, "Alright, if you promise to stop worrying so much. I'm fine Daryl. I'm fine." And just like that she was asleep.
He had to get back to the garage, he had a business to run, work to do, people counting on him. He would take care of all that, but first he took a moment to hold her close, gently stroking her hair and thinking about how he used to see his life. It seemed real good to him. He had a solid house, a sweet daughter, a good business, food on the table and clothes on his back. Everything he needed.
Then she came into his life and he found out that something real special had been missing.
Meantime, over in Switzer County there lived a man. He'd always been a peaceful, gentle-natured and Godfearing man. He was different now, angry and seeking the highest form of revenge.
He was preparing to leave for King County where he would see to it that a dark-haired man paid for the lives he'd ruined and the pain he'd caused.
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A/N I think Daryl is proving that even when you're full of doubt, you can't fight love :) There's also quite a few people with not too friendly intentions toward the dark-haired man. Please leave a comment and let me know what you think. As always, the chap photo is on my tumblr blogs gneebee and bethylmethbrick, please check it out. I hope to see you all back next Friday for more of It Matters to Me. Until then remember, I love ya large! xo gneebee