The doctor kept to his promise and was back by midday. The house was empty. All the ex-guards of Ron's were exploring. Some of them were looking for work and lodgings in town while others were arranging transport to their birthplaces. Many were deciding to stay in town if they could find work though now that they were truly free. The town's people had a different reaction though.
Many were skeptical. They didn't dare smile or celebrate in any way. They believed that the moment they did so, Ron would come ridding into town on one of his horses and hurt them with his power. The younger generation was much more grateful and happy. They were dancing in the streets with fiddles and flutes playing old tunes. Even the guards joined in on a few dances. Everyone could agree that the ashes of the house toward the East were a good sign.
Jack was pleased. Not only by the fact that he had made his town happy for once, but also that his friends in the guard were now able to live their lives. He offered a few of them jobs on his small plot of land, but so far their answers were "let's see what's in town first". They knew Jack wouldn't be able to pay them very much. His attitude darkened when Fai and Syaoran headed down with grim faces. Jack put on a strong face though and led them and Kurogane outside to work.
His land was a mess after two days of neglect. There wasn't much crop this late in the season, but there was defiantly a lot to do before the snow came. Jack started Kurogane on the task of chopping wood. Most of it had been from dead trees in the forest that he had cut. A few were younger ones that he found. He put Syaoran and Fai on field work. Mostly it was pulling weeds and picking ripe vegetables though. Jack gathered smaller sticks and dry grass into bags for when they needed to start fires in the winter. No one judged him for taking the easiest of all the tasks.
Jack's thoughts were consumed with his sister. She had always been weak, even before their mother died. The pain from her decaying muscles was making her delusional also. He couldn't stand to be by her even at this point because everything time she saw him, she asked for someone that was long gone. Today she was asking for Hiro and Nakietra. It was too painful to try and talk about them like they're all right.
Jack looked back as he heard someone walking across the back path. He saw the doctor stop and wait just in the shadows of the house. Jack dropped his bags on the ground and ran to him. Kurogane looked up and the doctor and dropped his axe.
"Jack," The doctor greeted gently. Jack didn't have any words for the emotions churning inside of him. He was scared of the news that was about to come. Dawn has had bad days before, but they have always been iffy in terms of her getting better. Kurogane was walking to the doctor now just like Fai and Sakura.
"I sorry Jack, but we're at the end of the line. She won't make to the night," The doctor said quietly. Jack breathed out and his face fell.
"No," Jack said silently in disbelief. Dread visibly filled him up as he seemed to grow smaller and older in a matter of second.
"I gave her something for the pain and Sakura has some extra. Give her as much as she asks for," The doctor whispered mournfully. He was upset too but not as much as Jack. Everyone in the village loved Dawn, but not many liked Jack. The doctor was one of those few who cared about both of them ever since they were born.
"How long?" Jack managed meekly. Syaoran looked to the ground, his face sad just like Fai's. They hadn't known Dawn for long, but they truly liked her. She was sweet and innocent, but she also knew trades that were meant for those that were opposite of her nature. Kurogane had absolutely no idea what was going on. Jack was gone in a few seconds.
"There's nothing else you can do for her?" Fai asked to make sure. The doctor nodded his head.
"Her brain is a muscle, and like the ones in her arms, it's decaying faster than it was before. You saw that this morning that she doesn't remember a lot of things that she knew yesterday," The doctor told the man. Fai nodded his head sadly. The doctor glanced to all of them.
"Nakietra is recovering rapidly though. I've never seen wounds close so easily as hers do. She should be waking up soon. I want someone to contact me as soon as she does…Don't let Jack leave Dawn though," The doctor said and turned to leave. Kurogane almost asked him a question, but then stopped himself. Nakietra didn't even want him to know what he overheard last night. He should make Syaoran or Fai aware of it.
"At least Nakietra's recovering," Fai said trying to lighten the darkened mood with a small smile, "Maybe she can help Dawn." The other two looked to him, almost in disbelief.
"If she could have, wouldn't she have helped her before this?" Syaoran asked. He looked like he was about to cry as he sometimes did when he heard about something completely unfair happening to someone. Fai shook his head no very slightly. Kurogane looked at him but knew he wasn't the only one keeping secrets from everyone else.
"Maybe she can't though. We won't know until she wakes up," Fai said and turned around to walk back to the field. Without words, Syaoran and Kurogane turned back to finish their own work as well.
The sun continued to move across the sky as they worked. The field was finished quickly and then they started helping with the wood. Syaoran took the already chopped wood and started putting it in the wood shed attached to the back of the house while Fai took over Jack's work.
"I'm hungry. Maybe it's time to do some cooking," Fai said and started walking inside once the sun was low enough in the sky. Syaoran followed, stifling a yawn, as well as Kurogane who looked just as awake as he had been this morning. The boys entered the warm house and looked around. Nakietra was on the floor in front of the fire with her leather book out. As soon as the door opened, she had slammed it shut and turned her head back to look at them. Nero was lying in back of her and looked asleep.
"You're awake!" Fai said happily with a smile. Nakietra didn't smile.
"Yes," She responded. Nero brought his head up and then started to stretch out his back. Then he was on his feet and walking to Syaoran who hesitantly patted his head. Nero was happy enough and then went into the kitchen. Meanwhile, no one said anything. Fai realized Nakietra was the last person she wanted to talk to so he headed into the kitchen. Syaoran collapsed on the lonely couch and was asleep then. Kurogane walked over to her and took a seat on the ground next to her. She put her book carefully next to her and twisted her body to face him.
"How are you better so fast?" He asked with a small smile. He was glad she was fine. She tapped her knife that was balancing on her knee and smiled softly.
"The spirits healed me," She responded softly. Syaoran sat up suddenly and their heads turned sharply to him.
"I just remembered, the doctor said he wanted to talk with you," He said. Nakietra's grimaced and looked away.
"I don't like him…where's Jack?" She asked then with a suspicious tone. Syaoran swung his legs to the ground while Kurogane stared at her.
"He's upstairs with Dawn," Kurogane said simply. Nakietra stared at his face and then pursed her lips. She understood what was going on then. She pulled her knees up and buried her face into them. Dawn was young. She shouldn't have to die like this. Syaoran left the house but neither of them looked up.
"I need my herb bag," She said suddenly and looked up. Kurogane blinked a few times and then went to get it.
"What are you thinking?" He asked her. She looked up with those stubborn eyes.
"I have something that could save Dawn's life," She said mournfully. He pulled the bag over from its place by the couch and watched her look through it. Jar after jar of herbs was looked at and checked until she found the one she wanted. It was labeled "Sweet Barb" in spiky letters that were defiantly not her own. She unscrewed the lid and pulled out a golden vial from the middle of the bark like sticks. It emitted an unnatural light that could only be described as blessed or holy.
"What is that?" He asked in almost wonder. Nakietra's eyes flickered to him. She closed the jar and hopped to her feet. She looked anything but happy..
"Dawn's saving grace," She said softly as she stared at it. Pain reflected in her eyes as well as the golden light. Kurogane wondered for a moment why this one vial was causing her internal pain. Suddenly, she dashed to the stairs and took the steps two at a time. Kurogane followed her up, curious to see what she was going to do as they burst into Dawns room.
Dawn's room was defiantly made for a little girl. Her covers and pillows had lace around the edges and everything was in pale pastel colors that signified innocence. Dawn was in her bed talking about how her mother was going to come home from work and make her soup because she was sick. Jack listened, his face defiantly in pain, but Dawn didn't notice. Sakura did though, and it was tearing her apart from where she sat at the edge of the bed.
Jack stroked her hand with his thumb. His hand was shaking but Dawn didn't seem to feel it. Nakietra paused just inside the room and watched for a moment. The scene destroyed her and her own internal conflict disappeared completely. Jack looked up at Nakietra with an amazed look. He couldn't say anything at all.
"I can save her," Nakietra said in a hurried tone and darted around to the other side of the bed, "Pick her head up." Jack did as he was told. Ever so gently, Nakietra eased the cork from the slim bottle. Once it was free, she slowly brought the vial to Dawn's lips and poured its contents down her throat. All the while, Jack kept repeating that it was medicine that would make her better, hoping it would get through to her. It did and she swallowed without any sort of resistance.
Before their eyes, Dawn became an angel just for a few moments. The golden liquid shone through her skin and traced her body in all of ancient symbols. As it did so, her body came back to life before their eyes. Dawn's pale skin turned back to its pinkish shade while her cheeks flushed rosy red as they had before she had gotten sick. All the way down to her fingers and toes, her body filled out into a healthy girl's. No longer was she pale or bone thin, she was now a true girl that had a chance to dream and live a good life. Tears shone in Jack's eyes as he watched Dawn come to life, while Nakietra watched with a longing that only Kurogane could see, tears and pain twisting her face as she looked down at the empty bottle which she clenched in her hands.
Nakietra
"Nakia, I won't force you to drink it. Promise me that you won't throw it away though?" Hiro said to me. His voice was shaking with emotion. I looked up at him, my eyes getting distracted by the knots of the Elder Tree at his back on purpose. They were bigger than my head but were so soft. The nectar from the tree's fruit, which only bloomed once every thousand years, could heal any sickness or injury. We found one of those fruits, and Hiro got it and squeezed its juice into a small vial we had.
"I promise I won't waste it," I told my brother before wrapping my arms around his neck. He smelled of sweat after his climb up and down the tree and his jacket felt rough against my arms. It wasn't like the smooth leather one our mother had tanned specifically for him, but it filled its purpose of protecting him.
Hiro, I used it when I needed it just like you wanted me to. I hope you're proud of me for using it on Dawn instead of me. I've had a good life, better than any other girl from our home could ever have. I feel…like I've lost though. There's nothing for me after I save out home…so why do I feel like I just made the worst choice I can in my life.
I watch Dawn sit up. I remember I had to help her sit up the other day and also to stand. She throws her arms around Jack and my throat tightens. I miss my brother. I take a step away from the bag and run out of the room. I need to be alone. I can't ruin this because I can't handle the memories. I hate this knife. I hate how clear it makes some of my memories.
I run out the front door. Nero is right behind me as I dart into the trees. I don't feel any better. Tears stream down my cheeks and I gasp for air. I stop by an old tree stump and sit in front of it. I bring my knees up and cry into them. My fingers rip away the bandages around my arms and my fingers make new cuts into my flesh. This is why I don't cut my nails.
"Stop it!" Kurogane yells at me and grabs my wrists. I look up and try to pull them away. He holds me still as I try to claw him with them.
"Leave me alone!" I scream at him and try to kick him. He throws my hands down and pulls me into a tight hug. I squirm but I can't move. I can't hurt him to make him leave me alone. I need to be alone! I can't be near these people!
"Tell me what's wrong," He says as I start to calm down. I collapse my head onto his shoulder. I see Hiro so very clear. I cry harder as I remember so much about him. I hate this knife. I hate the pain it brings me from showing me these memories.
I see us spending days at the lakes for the sole reason that it's hot out. I see the times we took the children with us and I see the nights where it was just me, and him, and Toya splashing in the water and running half-naked through the fields. I see older memories of Hiro teaching me how to draw and then drawing me and our family because he could. I hear his voice calling me his "Blackened Nakia" because whenever I drew my hands turned black from the charcoal. I smelled his strong scent of iron and dust, the smells of war I called them.
I swallow my screams. I can't have him. I can't have Toya just like I couldn't have my cousins. I need to be alone…it's so much harder to be strong when you're alone though. How can I live like this? My mind is going inane seeing these hurtful memories over and over again without anyone to help me with them.
I feel Nero's mind enter mine, but he only dampens my emotions. I dig my fingers into Kurogane's back as the pressure in my head becomes unbearable. It's too much. I can't take it. It slowly goes away though as Nero rips the knife away from me. My connection with them breaks and my body relaxes. Everything hurts, especially my head.
"Are you okay?" He asks finally. I can't say anything.
"I'm sorry," I apologize and tears well up in my eyes again. I must look so weak and insane right now.
"Tell me what's wrong," He says calmly. I can't answer that.
"Why is everything so hard in this life?" I ask. I always asked Hiro. He never had an answer for me. He would just hug tightly and then start talking about something else.
"To make us stronger," He answers. My mind freezes. I wasn't expecting an answer.
"How?" I ask.
"Life tests us to see if we can survive, and in passing those tests we become stronger, both in the body and the mind," He says gently. It was possibly the wisest and more poetic thing I've ever heard him say. He's always been a quiet person, someone who I hated answering.
"Sometimes, the tests are too hard, and we need help those. Those who have doubts and don't ask for help fail, while those that ask usually succeed," He continues.
"Are you trying to say there is no shame in asking for help, or in saying that I can't do something on my own?" I ask after a few minutes. His arms relax around me as I pull back to stare at him. He stares back at me.
"If you truly need help, it's better to ask for it than to die trying to do something impossible," He responds. I swallow hard. His face isn't scolding or disappointed for once. It's almost affectionate. It's strange.
"You don't have to do everything on your own," He tells me. I know this. "You throw yourself into danger without any regard for how anyone else feels about your decision…I didn't know your brother, but I don't think he would he would have let you live your life like this if he was here," He tells me seriously. My throat closes. I can't talk. He's right. Hiro would have tied me up and locked me in a room at this point if he saw all the risks I was taking on my own. I close my eyes and feel two more tears fall.
"Thank you," I say in a broken voice and hug him. He puts and hand on the back of head and one on my back. It's comfortable.
"My brother…you're right about him. He hated me doing anything on my own," I admit in a shaky voice.
"How much older was he to you?" Kurogane asks.
"Eight years. Our mother…lost five children before I was born. I was the only one that lived," I say. I never thought about my unborn siblings or how it might have affected Hiro until now. Maybe he was protective of me because I was the only one that lived.
"Brothers…are usual protective of their younger sisters I've noticed," He says softly. I thought of Jack with Dawn. He did everything to try and give her a worthy life. She likes being protected though, I don't. I like to fight my own battles.
"I've always been treated like glass by everyone," I respond. It was always because I was sick that people treated me differently. I like behind treated like a normal person though. I like being here because to them I'm normal and someone that has to pitied and treated like a fragile doll.
"Did you ever have brothers or sisters?" I ask.
"No," he answers simply. "Wasn't your mother a healer?"
"Yes," I confirm. Even though my mother had married into the profession, she was excellent at it. My father and uncle didn't have a talent for it. My mother actually met my father while she was taking lesson from my grandmamma on healing.
"Did she make that medicine that you gave Dawn?" He asks. My face crumbles and I burry it into his shoulder. Hiro had meant that for me. I feel so guilty.
"No…Hiro got that from a fruit that grows on a special tree. The fruit takes 1000 years to grow and only one starts growing every 500 years," I say through his shirt.
"What does it do?" He asks.
"It heals any injury or sickness, genetic or otherwise," I respond. Jack will scold me when he hears this. He's not my brother. I wish he never acted like it. I pull back and stare at him. There are loose hairs in my eyes sight. Kurogane take the hand away from the back of my head and brushes them behind my ear. I reach back and undo my braid. It's a few days old at this point and needs to be redone.
"I like it when your hair's down," He says slowly. I stare at him.
"No one's ever said that," I say. I wrap the ribbon around my wrist but don't move to redo it yet. I like it when my hair's down too.
"That's because you don't keep it down," He responds. Even Toya's never said that to me and he loved to compliment everything I've ever done. He leans in and I close my eyes. His hand goes to the back of my head and I feel his lips on mine.
I've never had a kiss before. His lips were cold against mine, like ice. He pulls back and I open my eyes to stare at him. Hiro told me that you should never look away from someone if they kiss you.
"We should head back," He says confidently. I nod my head because I don't know what else to say. He stands up first and then helps me up. His hands linger in mine. I curl my hands around his. They feel tiny and delicate in his bigger, harder hands. Hiro's were always rough and chapped but Kurogane's are smoother in a way. He lets go of one of my hands and starts leading me back through the trees. I don't know what to say. This kiss wasn't from pity though. I lean against him and smile. I feel…normal.
Nero leads the way to the house. Kurogane let's go of my hand and opens the door. I don't think we have to say anything to each other to know this has to be a secret. Kurogane steps in first and holds the door open for me. I see Doctor Bangash and I frown. Syaoran is asleep on the couch and Fai is talking to the doctor. Dawn and Jack come out of the kitchen. Both are smiling. I can't smile.
"Jack doesn't lie when he says you're running around already," The doctor says warmly. I don't share the feeling.
"I'm pretty tough that way," I respond. I haven't needed doctors in years. I can't handle taking care of myself.
"I just need to check your burns and talk to you for a few minutes," he says and gestures to the door to the girls' bath. Nero wanders into the kitchen in search of food and leaves me to fend for myself. I walk to the bath, feeling very alone as I walk inside and the doctor follows in behind me.