• SUCH THINGS HAPPEN •

Starring: Luigi

From: Super Mario Franchise

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Luigi has been having a lot of bad luck lately. He told Mario that he believes that some which got a hold of him.

Luigi: "That old hag, Kamella, I guess she's the closest we've got to a witch around here."

Mario: "But Luigi, witches have gone out of style, haven't they ?"

Luigi had a run-in with Kamella months before. He had accidentally hit her cat with his go-kart and killed it.

Luigi: "I'm really sorry, Ms. Kamella. I'll get you a new cat, just as pretty and good."

Then Kamella's eyes are filled with hate.

Kamella: "I raise that cat from a kitten. I loved her. You'll be sorry for this, Luigi Mario."

Luigi sent her a new cat and heard nothing more. The milk that Luigi bought tasted awful despite not being expired. Next his go-kart broke down. And his girlfriend, Princess Daisy, fell down and broke her arm during their date.

Luigi: "Man this is too much bad luck, I'll get even with that Kamella."

Daisy: "Hey come on now Luigi, you don't believe in witches. Your just upset. It's fine, I'm pretty sure this bad luck you're having will go away."

But Toadsworth believed in witches. He had one once told the Mario Bros that there was only one sure way to stop a witch from causing trouble.

Toadsworth: "You must find a black walnut tree and draw the witch's picture on it. Then mark an X where the witch's heart is, and drive the nail into the X. Every day you have drive it in a little deeper. If a witch is causing the trouble, she'll feel pain. When the witch can't stand it anymore, she'll come to you, or send somebody, and try to borrow something. If you give the witch what she wants that breaks the power of the nail, and she'll go on tormenting you. But if you don't, she'll have to stop-- or the pain will kill her."

That's what the nice and old gentle Toadsworth said. Of course neither of the Mario Brothers believed it, they thought it was pure craziness. Of course Toadsworth didn't have much schooling. And the Mario Brothers knew better. Then one day Luigi's perfectly healthy dog, Polterpup, dropped dead, just like that. Despite knowing better than Toadsworth, Luigi thought it really is the work of Kamella. He got his pen from his room, and a hammer and a nail, and went into the woods. He found a black walnut tree and drew a picture of Kamella on it. He made an X where her heart was, like Toadsworth has said to do. With the hammer he drove the nail a little way into the X. Then he went home.

Luigi: "Man, I feel like a fool."

He told Mario.

Mario: "Do you think ?"

Luigi: "Oh wow thanks for cheering me up bro."

Mario: "Hey what you did is foolish, do you really think Kamella is a witch and that's she's behind all this bad luck that's happening to you."

Luigi: "Fine, point taken."

The next day a Koopa named Koops came by.

Koops: "Hello, Ms. Kamella isn't feeling well, she wonders if she could borrow some sugar from you."

Luigi stared at Koops in amazement. He took a deep breath and said.

Luigi: "Tell her I'm sorry, but I don't have any sugar right now."

When Koops left, Luigi went back to the walnut tree and drove the nail in another inch. The next day the Koops came back.

Koops: "Hey Ms. Kamella is pretty sick. She's wondering if you've got any sugar yet."

Luigi: "Tell her I'm sorry, but I still don't have any."

Luigi went out into the woods and drove the nail in an another inch. The following day Koops came back.

Koops: "Ms. Kamella is getting sicker. She really needs some sugar."

Luigi: "Tell her I still don't have any."

Then both Mario and Daisy became really upset after what they just saw.

Mario: " Luigi, you've got to stop this."

Daisy: "Mario is right. If what you're doing actually works, it's like murder. You got to stop."

Then Luigi responded coldly.

Luigi: "I'll stop when she does."

Towards dusk he stood in the yard staring at the ridge where Kamella lived, wondering what was going on up there. Then, in the half darkness, he saw Kamella coming slowly down the hill toward him. With her pinched, funny face and her old purple coat, she did look like a witch. As she got closer, Luigi so that she could barely walk.

Luigi: "Maybe I'm really hurting her."

Luigi thought. He ran to get his hammer to pull the nail out. But before he could leave, Kamella was in the yard, her face twisted with rage.

Kamella: "First you killed my cat. Then you wouldn't give me a bit of sugar when I needed it."

Kamella swore at Luigi, and fell dead at his feet.

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Doctor Mario: "I'm not surprised that she dropped dead that way. Kamella was very old, maybe ninety. It was her heart, of course."

Luigi: "Some people thought that she was a witch."

Doctor Mario: "I've heard that."

Luigi: "Somebody that I know thought Kamella had witched him. He a picture of her on a tree, then drove a nail into it to make her stop."

Doctor Mario: "That's an old superstition. But people like us don't believe in that sort of thing, do we ?"