Chapter 2

El Auria (1850 in Earth Years)

"Paren, it was irresponsible for you to create this device and then hide it away."

"I didn't build it so that the people on this planet could have a toy to play with, mother." At three hundred years old he did not appreciate being scolded by his mother, but he knew this was simply her way.

"Then why did you, son?"

To find my wife, who has run away from me and deserted her daughter, he thought, but did not say aloud. He moved around inside his workshop, wishing that his mother would leave him be. "It is to be used only when necessary; a method of enhancing the gift...for those of us who have it," he explained, since she remained standing in the doorway expectantly.

"Your daughter has the gift," his mother reminded him. "She may already be capable of shifting dimensions on her own."

"For now she is much too young," said Paren. "Perhaps when she has grown older…."

"And then when she is older I hope you will let her be free," said his mother.

His eyes narrowed as he watched her watching him. "Free? Like her mother?"

"You must not punish the girl for the way her mother behaved. When she is ready to use her abilities, you must allow her to do so, son."

Paren nodded, but there was still hesitation in his eyes. "You are right," he said, although his eyes were still cold. First his wife, Guinan's mother had left them alone to travel the galaxy as though she didn't have a care in the world; as though she didn't have a family. And as usual, his own mother could not even show him the compassion to understand that he did not want to lose his child as well.

"Good," his mother said simply. "Because someday, this world may need her help."

Enterprise 2366

"So I've been having these headaches," he said moving in swiftly. His opponent stepped to the side and he adjusted his blade just in time to deflect her blow. She had been practicing, he noted slightly impressed. Only slightly.

"I don't suppose you've mentioned this to your physician?" Guinan asked, as they stepped back into position.

"No," said Picard, raising his blade and dropping it before resuming the ready position.

"How do you think she would feel to know that you're telling me?" She advanced brazenly, and he shuffled backward.

"Taking this rather seriously today, aren't you?" he asked, fending her off again.

"You still haven't answered my question, Captain," the bartender pressed him.

"Well, she might feel a bit left out," he admitted, pausing. Guinan jumped toward him suddenly, and he deflected the blow, before landing a point against her torso. "What was that all about?" he snapped, beginning to feel rather annoyed.

"You said you had a headache, and you are obviously distracted by emotional concerns...so I am just capitalizing on your weaknesses," she said.

"Emotional concerns! Well I've had nothing of the sort," he protested, now on the attack.

"If you say so, Captain," said Guinan. "But if I were you, I would talk to Doctor Crusher. Emotions can be powerful things. I'm reminding you of this, because you are so good at hiding them. It doesn't mean others are as talented at doing so."

"Pause program," he shouted. It didn't occur to him that there was nothing to pause, for they were the only moving parts to this particular holodeck program. "Guinan, what the hell are you getting at?" he demanded, ripping off his fencing mask. He pulled off his sweaty gloves and threw them on a nearby bench.

His friend's expression was innocent. "Relationships can be difficult, Captain. I am just trying to lend a hand."

He glowered at her and ran a towel over his face, before draping it angrily around his neck. He sniffed, and continued to stare her down, but she remained silent. "I appreciate your counsel…but right now I don't need it. And my headaches, I assure you, are not being caused by my emotional concerns—not that I have any," he added quickly. Picard threw her a towel, which she caught easily and watched him walk away.

"All the more reason to see a doctor then," she called after him as he exited the holodeck.

Captain's Personal Log Star Date

"Having just completed rather difficult political negotiations on the newly admitted Federation member planet Vidian IV, the crew is resting briefly before our next mission. While we await our orders, my command officers and I have been invited down to the famed Vidian Gardens to take part in a traditional spring celebration…. I admit I am slightly reticent to participate in what appears to be a religious ceremony, and I continue to have reservations about the Vidians' readiness to enter the Federation, however-"

The door beeped. Someone was requesting entry to his living quarters. Jean-Luc Picard blinked in annoyance, and slid his chair backward. The arrival of another person reminded of his irritating conversation with Guinan earlier in the day. "Computer, pause," he said. "Come in," he said, addressing the doorway, and getting to his feet.

He moved around the desk, nodding as his visitor walked in, his annoyance turning into something more complex. He knew what this was going to be about, and yet, as usual, he felt he was at a disadvantage.

Beverly Crusher walked slowly toward him. "I was on a break, and thought I'd come by to talk," she clasped her hands in front of her as thought about to begin a monologue. "I hope that I'm not interrupting your work, Captain."

He smiled and walked closer to her. He knew that using his formal title while they were alone was something of a subtle dig, despite the neutral expression present in her features. He had been distant lately he knew, just as they were beginning a tentative romantic relationship.

Several weeks ago, believing that death may have been imminent, they had admitted their long secret love for each other and then had made love for the first time. The danger had passed, and they had taken a vacation together on Risa, with other various crew members tagging along. Now, the pace had slowed considerably, and they both knew it.

"No, please do come in," he said with a smile.

She took his offer of a seat. He sat down across from her and waited for her to speak. She hesitated and took a deep breath before starting. "Look, Jean-Luc; I can see that you've taken a step back…which is fine. Of course this is very new for both of us. Everything happened so quickly during the whole ordeal with Claudia…all I'm trying to say is that… well maybe we did rush things." She looked at him searchingly, hoping he did not decide to retreat further from her.

His smile faded slightly, and he looked down. "There were moments that I feared I would never see you again," he said quietly, examining his hands. "And because of that belief, perhaps I acted in ways I would not normally. Perhaps we both did." He looked back up at her. "But I don't regret anything I said to you…nor do I regret that we…." He swallowed and trailed off. His strange headache was slowly creeping back into his skull, making his thoughts feel a bit cloudy. He blinked again.

Beverly sighed, and looked relatively relieved, not seeming to notice that his discomfort may have been physical. "I don't regret anything either. I just have noticed you've been quite distant since we returned from Risa. I know I've been quiet as well. I've been thinking a lot about what happened to Allen."

Picard rubbed his hands on his trouser legs. "I'm sorry, Beverly," he said quietly. "Have you spoken to Counselor Troi about it?" He saw a brief expression of embarrassment flash over her features, and he cleared his throat. "Of course, I am always here if you need to talk. I wasn't trying to suggest that you needed to see Troi—or that you couldn't talk to me about these sorts of things, because of course, you can…."

To his surprise she laughed abruptly and reached over and put a hand on his knee. "I know I can, Jean-Luc. I know…." She smiled gently at him, and he took her hand. "And I also know that discussing private subjects makes you uncomfortable, so I try not to blindside you with them. But I do enjoy talking with you." He smiled back at her, and they fell into a more comfortable silence. He was beginning to feel more comfortable lately just being with her and not feeling the need to speak.

Beverly frowned as she studied his face. Dark circles were beginning to form under his eyes. "You look so tired," she said, and reached out to touch his face.

As if on cue, he retrieved his hand from hers and covered his mouth as he yawned. He shrugged slightly. "I'm fine," he said trying to sound reassuring. "In fact, I am sleeping so soundly, I haven't dreamt in…." he trailed off, realizing he couldn't remember having dreamt at all since their return from Risa. This was actually disappointing since he rather enjoyed dreaming about Beverly.

I'm fine, he'd said. Beverly was learning to ignore these small lies he told, and instead of letting this one anger her she simply pressed him for a more convincing answer. "Is it the Vidian situation? I know it's been stressful for you, but at least it's over now. Another success no doubt," she said brightening. "Of course there are bound to be some bumps along the way for any new Federation society."

He stood up. "I suppose the final negotiations have been on my mind…but you are right of course; the Vidians have made their case, and passed the requirements for membership."

She stood up. "Jean-Luc, I can tell you're still troubled. You are trying to convince yourself, but you don't believe they should be Federation members yet. Why?" she asked curiously.

He faced her. He was trying to make the effort to be more open, less distant. But he was used to being a solitary person. Despite his indignant response to Guinan, lately he had been having doubts, despite his new closeness to Beverly. It was difficult to undue years of his belief that they would never be together. Now that they were together—at least now that they were making the attempt to be together, he had to get past these insecurities. He touched the desk top lightly with his fingertips. "I don't think the Vidians are ready," he admitted. "I know they have an established democratic government, have demonstrated a commitment to Federation principles…."

"And warp capability," Beverly added. "Not to mention a highly advanced system of medicine."

"Yes…" he agreed.

She frowned, and then gave him a puzzled smile "So then in what ways have they not met your standards, Captain?" She thought a moment while watching him. Then it dawned on her. "It's their devotion to their religion, isn't it?" He made a dissatisfied face, but said nothing. She hit him on the forearm lightly. Was Jean-Luc Picard capable of intolerance? Rarely did she have a glimpse of him as a person with human prejudices. "Captain! What does the Vidian religion have to do with their readiness to enter the Federation?"

He folded his arms over his chest and stared at the floor for a moment before slowly raising his eyes to meet her curious gaze. "Beverly, centuries ago we learned the hard way again and again that mixing government and religion had mostly disastrous consequences. More often than not it led to despotism and sanctioned intolerance and ignorance in every corner of the Earth. I simply do not understand how a supposedly advanced society could still believe in such things."

She stared at him in open surprise. She didn't entirely disagree, but was surprised at the vehemence of his opinion on the subject. "But have you studied their religion?"

"Not closely," he admitted.

"Well then how do you know they are clinging to intolerance and ignorance? You of all people, as a representative of the Federation should be willing to give these people a chance."

He shook his head. "Look…Beverly; I just believe that if you must be religious, it should simply be a personal view. There is no place for superstition and religious faith in modern society." His tone was final and imperious, as though he was a teacher and she was his student. Normally, she would be starting to grow angry right about now, but she had had so few private conversations with him lately she decided to let it go. She would let the subject drop. For now.

Beverly Crusher shrugged and shifted feet. "Are you going to get dressed soon? The ceremony is only a few hours away, you know."

"Of course," he said. "Thankfully Commander Riker convinced the Vidians to allow us to wear our own clothing to this event. That doesn't mean I'm excited to wear my dress uniform," he reminded her.

Beverly opened her mouth as if to say something, before closing it again. The pink color on her cheeks seemed to stand out suddenly. Picard watched her with mild interest. Was she blushing?

"What?" he prompted.

"I've always liked the way you look in your dress uniform," she admitted sounding slightly embarrassed.

Despite his immense modesty when it came to such matters, he smiled.

El Auria

Guinan sat quietly as her grandmother continued the story. She pulled a blanket around her small shoulders. The glow of firelight made the shadows in the darkness outside seem to close in around them.

"Once El Auria formed and life evolved, a very powerful being took notice of our waywardness and she offered us her direction and guidance."

"Orla!" exclaimed Guinan. "She is our protector."

"Yes," said her grandmother with small smile. "For millennia she watched over all life on this planet, until one day an equally powerful being visited, and tried to claim El Auria for his own. The ancient people called him the Other."

Guinan sat staring up at her grandmother in rapt attention. "What happened?"

"The people of El Auria were very ignorant and although they loved Orla, or perhaps because they loved her so much, they feared the newcomer would drive her away from El Auria, and they tried to kill him."

Guinan clapped her hands over her eyes. "Did he die?" she squeaked out, peaking between her fingers.

Her grandmother's face seemed to flicker in the firelight. "Oh no…instead he became even stronger. Their hatred and violence only empowered him."

Guinan dropped her hands. "But…what did Orla do?"

"Orla was so dismayed at the behavior of the El Aurian people that she left us, and did not return for many, many years. She vowed to stay away until we truly learned to heed her direction, which of course was that we practice peace."

"Is that how we became the People Who Listen?"

"Yes," said her grandmother, pleased. "Before we could earn her protection and guidance again, we had to lose her. Eventually we as a people learned to listen, and use those skills to heal others. But it took many years of suffering for the people to come to understand what Orla had been trying to teach us for so long."

"What happened to El Auria while Orla was gone?"

"War, famine, and death. Just what the Other wanted."

"But, Orla returned. What happened then? Did she kill the Other? What happened to him?"

Her grandmother yawned. "I am growing tired, little girl. You will have to wait until next time to find out."