"Lois?" He looked possibly more confused than she felt.
She shielded her eyes. "I swear, Clark, if you don't get that flashlight out of my eyes, I'm going to-"
"Sorry," he said a little sheepishly, pointing it downward. "I'm just surprised to see you is all."
"Surprised? You're surprised? This is a good joke, I'll admit. Where did you get the car and uniform?" That badge pinned to his jacket looked so real. "No, wait, let me guess. It was Mike, wasn't it? I cleaned him out Friday, and this is his little payback. Is he hiding in the car?" She peered over her shoulder, but of course, it was too dark to see.
He didn't miss a beat. "Are you drunk?"
He was serious. Drop-dead, heart-attack serious. "No, I'm not drunk, but I'm starting to wish I was." Things couldn't possibly make less sense if she were. "One of us has lost their mind, and it isn't me."
"I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to step out of the car."
She still didn't know what his game was, but she flung the car door open and put her palms against the side and spread her legs. "Is this some kind of fantasy of yours to give me a pat down? Go ahead. I'll play along."
"Uh, no. I need you to perform a sobriety test for me."
She turned around and chuckled, albeit a little nervously. "I know. This is one of those hidden camera TV shows. You're hoping to get a funny reaction out of me."
He held the flashlight aloft to highlight his pointer finger. "I need you to follow my finger."
She sighed, but she did as he asked.
"I need you to take nine steps walking heel-to-toe in a straight line before you turn around and walk back. Understand?"
"Are you kidding?" But the fact that the flashlight was now pointed at the ground said that he was not.
She complied with this test too if only to convince him that she was not drunk. Though she might wonder about him if she didn't know about his physiology.
"Okay, last test. I need you to lift your foot a few inches off the ground and hold it there until I tell you to put it down."
She assumed a flamingo pose while he counted out the seconds. After thirty of them, he said, "Well, you're clearly sober. I'm going to let you go with a warning this time. You're Chloe's cousin, and she's like family to me, so consider it a one-time favor."
"Like family?" Since when were your in-laws like family? And what was she? Chopped liver?
"I guess you're visiting her. I know Mom would really love to see you while you're here. She told me you called, but I didn't quite believe it. Well, have a nice night, and drive the speed limit."
Was this another bout of amnesia on his part? But if he had hurled to earth and lost part of his memory then what? He had knocked some poor, unsuspecting sheriff out and stripped him of his clothes and stolen his car? That didn't make much sense either.
She couldn't forget the time that Clark had traveled to a parallel universe and a different Clark had taken his place. Or was it her that had been sucked into a different world this time? The box had been destroyed, but who said there weren't other methods of switching? "Okay, thanks," she said very slowly, sticking up her left hand to wave. She slid her eyes over to look. Her wedding ring was still there. "I'm just going to drive along on my merry little way then."
She got in her car and waited. And waited. He wasn't going to pull off until she did. Did he think she was going to go on a joyride if he went first? She pulled onto the road and punched in the number for The Watchtower again.
She checked her rear view mirror. Even though it was legal to make calls while driving in Kansas, she wouldn't put it past Officer Kent to pull her over again and give her a lecture on distracted driving. Husband Clark had often enough.
Green Lantern knew it was her right away. "Did you find him?"
"I found him, but he's not himself at all. Clark didn't even seem to recognize me. As his wife, I mean."
"Who's Clark?"
"Not you too."
"I'm going to call Oliver. If you think you're married to another man, he's going to want to know."