A/N: Thanks for reviewing!

Cuz a part of me died and a liveliness was lost when you passed, and a light in me dimmed as a certainty was slipping through my grasp

Rose insisted that Rey couldn't go out in her current greasy, sandy outfit, no matter how comfortable it was. Rey protested but then Jannah and Kaydel agreed with her and they all went to get ready. Well, what they called getting ready, which differed greatly from Rey's experience of preparation. She had only once put this much attention into her wardrobe, and that was because she had to go out during a sandstorm. Well, there was one other time she had put thought into her appearance, but she preferred to avoid thinking of it.

In any case, she was eventually deemed ready, dressed in Kaydel's clothes, with her hair down and curled slightly. The others were wearing flimsier attire than she was willing to wear, and she also insisted on wearing trousers rather than skirts – though her friends had selected fancier ones than she would normally have chosen. Kaydel told her she could borrow her clothes any time, and that they should go shopping together. She tried not to be too skeptical about that idea, hoping her smile was at least polite if not warm, and was relieved when they bustled off to rejoin the others.

Poe had a lot of friends. By the time they had left the building, Rey knew less than half of their party by name and had conversed with even fewer. Some she recognized as Resistance fighters, but she had no idea how Poe knew the rest. It was something of a relief to share a ride with Finn and Rose. Jannah had disappeared into a group of friends – possibly her former company of defected stormtroopers.

The place Poe had chosen was loud and fully crammed with people. Rey couldn't imagine how all of them could fit into it, but somehow they did. Someone put a cup into her hands and she realized she was quite thirsty. The noise became less noisome after that, and she was soon grinning and dancing.

This went on for a while – keeping track of time was too confusing to do – and then the establishment was much less crowded. People had smiled at her and said nice things when they left. It wasn't as distressing as it had been with the crowd in the hangar but was still not a wholly pleasant sensation. Rey did her best to smile back or nod in thanks for the compliments, but her head felt fuzzy and she didn't know what the appropriate response was.

Eventually, she found herself back in the big building where they would sleep tonight and work tomorrow. Rey wasn't sure what kinds of names buildings had in places where there were so many of them – surely there must be some way to tell them apart? Not that she would get lost or go into the wrong one. She just didn't know the word.

"A toast!" Poe called, disrupting her scattered thoughts.

They still had drinks somehow, though she wasn't sure how that had happened. She hoped she hadn't accidentally stolen a cup from the watering hole. Poe's sentiment was echoed by the remaining members of her party and she flushed.

"A toast to our Jedi, the hero of the Galaxy!" he said.

"To our hero!" was the response and everyone drank. She had no idea if she was supposed to drink to herself, but she did. There were cheers and laughter. Things got fuzzy for a while and the next thing she knew, she was eating a plate of some delicious meat with the most amazing sauce on it. She felt like she hadn't eaten in days.

Someone was giggling next to her and she turned to find Rose sitting there. "What?" she asked with her mouth full.

"A lot better than rations, huh?" Rose teased.

"Definitely!"

She was startled by someone dropping into the seat on the other side of her. "What are you girls talking about?" Poe asked. "The boys you like?"

For some reason, Rey started gigging and was relieved that Rose did the same. "No, Poe, girls don't always talk about boys," Rose admonished between giggles.

Several other people joined them, including Finn, Jannah, and people Rey didn't know. She smiled at them anyway.

"Well, Rose, I think the wars over and we won. So maybe we should be thinking about settling down. That's what our parents did, after all, and is why all of us are here," Poe continued, leading to raucous laughter. Grinning, Poe put his arm around the back of the seat and Rey leaned forward automatically. "So, we're all friends here. I am not ashamed to say that I have a particular friend in mind I'd like to see a bit more of."

The ladies present all giggled helplessly and the gentlemen looked a little miffed. "Oh, really?" Finn asked. "I bet you wouldn't say that to her face."

"I have. Apologies to those of you with… unique upbringings, but some of us have been in a relationship before. Have you even kissed a girl before, Finn?"

There was an uncomfortable silence as Rose and Finn both blushed brightly. "Of course," he mumbled.

"Congratulations. Did things get exciting in the stormtrooper barracks or have you been getting busy on base without me noticing?"

More raucous laughter. It was starting to hurt Rey's ears. "You might be surprised what we get up to," Jannah teased Poe and he laughed in earnest.

"I bet I would. You'll have to tell me all about it sometime." Jannah blushed and Rey had a sinking feeling as Poe turned his attention to her. "How about you, Rey? I hear the Jedi were celibate, but are you planning on continuing that tradition?"

"I… don't know," she replied slowly.

"Have you ever been kissed, Rey?" Rose asked, and Rey appreciated greatly that she'd redirected the question.

Sitting up a little taller, Rey nodded. "I have."

Everyone reacted strongly to that – some cheers, some distress. "You have? In that junkyard? Or have you been sneaking off to see some boy here lately? With a little help from the Force, maybe?"

That felt too like the truth for Rey, given her current inebriation, and she started coughing so hard that she could barely breathe.

"I think that's a yes," Jannah said drily as Rose patted Rey's back helpfully.

"Hmm, I shall make it my mission to find out who."

The conversation turned but Rey wasn't really listening anymore. She pulled her sleeve down to cover her scar and it was a sobering thought to consider how they would react to the truth.

Somehow they got back home and slept late the next morning. Well, at least Rey slept late. It was strange to awaken when the sun was so high in the sky and her first thought was to panic about how much work she would have to do. Then she remembered where she was and supposed that there wasn't any work for her here, nothing to distract herself from the endless emptiness she felt. At least she had slept well for the first time in weeks – maybe she should ask Rose to get her more of that stuff they were drinking.

With some trepidation, she left her quarters in search of food. There was an area with a table full of large containers of food. Finn was there, picking over the remains of his breakfast. He gave her a slight smile in greeting, which turned to a grimace as he held his head.

"Fun night," he muttered as she sat down with a full plate.

She nodded and focused on her food. It was delicious and she had never been given so many options before. She would never get used to this plenty, let alone the variety. She made quick work of her first plate and was deciding what to go back for when Finn put his hand on her arm.

"What?" she asked a little sharply, old instincts kicking in as she pulled back to guard her food.

He seemed startled and sat back abruptly, making her instantly regret her reaction. "I'm glad you're back. Finished with your Jedi stuff for now?"

"I don't know," she admitted.

"Well, you killed that evil creature, Palpatine. And both Supreme Leaders, it looks like. So hopefully you can stick around for a while and help us out."

His face was so earnest and hopeful that her heart clenched. How could she ever tell him the truth? About herself? About what really happened with Snoke? About Ben?

Swallowing, she forced herself to nod. "Hopefully."

He glanced around then leaned closer to her. "I've been wanting to tell you something. For a while now." He paused, waiting for her response and she nodded again uncertainly. "I think that I can feel things through the Force. And I thought maybe you could train me?"