Chapter 14:
Bella's POV:
"Dad?" I called, as I pushed open the front door.
"Hold on, Bells, stay right there."
"Huh?" I asked, pausing automatically.
"Gimme a second. Ouch, you got me, Alice."
"Alice?"
"Sorry, Charlie." Alice's trilling voice responded. "How's that?"
"I'm bleeding on it."
"You're fine. Didn't break the skin - trust me."
"What's going on?" I demanded, hesitant in the doorway.
"Thirty seconds, please, Bella." Alice told me. "Your patience will be rewarded."
"Humph." Charlie added. I tapped my foot, counting each beat. Before I got to thirty, Alice said.
"Okay, Bella, come in!" Moving with caution, I rounded the little corner into the living room.
"Oh." I huffed. "Aw. Dad. Don't you look-"
"Silly?" Charlie interrupted.
"I was thinking more like debonair." Charlie blushed. Alice took his elbow and tugged him around into a slow spin to showcase the pale gray tux.
"Now cut that out, Alice. I look like an idiot."
"No one dressed by me ever looks like an idiot."
"She's right, Dad. You look fabulous! What' the occasion?" Alice rolled her eyes.
"It's the final check on the fit. For both of you. I peeled my gaze off the unusually elegant Charlie for the first time and saw the dreaded white garment bag laid carefully across the sofa.
"Aaah."
"Go to your happy place, Bella. It won' take long." I sucked in a deep breath and closed my eyes. Keeping them shut, I stumbled my way up the stairs to my room. I stripped down to my underwear and held my arms straight out. "You'd think I was shoving bamboo splinters under your nails." Alice muttered, to herself as she followed me in. I paid no attention to her. I was in my happy place. In my happy place, the while wedding mess was over and done. Behind me. Already repressed and forgotten. We were alone, just Jacob and me. The setting was fuzzy and constantly in flux - it morphed from misty forest to cloud-covered city to arctic night - because Jacob was keeping the location of our honeymoon a secret to surprise me. But I wasn't especially concerned about the where part. Jacob and I were together, and I'd fulfilled my side of our compromise perfectly. I'd married him. That was the big one. Now it was his turn. I was only vaguely aware of Alice and the slip and slide of satin over my skin. I didn't care, for the moment, that the whole town was talking about me. I didn't think about the spectacle I would have to star in much too soon. I didn't worry about tripping on my train or giggling at the wrong moment or being too young or even the staring audience. I was in my happy place with Jacob.
"I miss you already."
"I don't need to leave. I can stay..."
"Mmm." It was quiet for a long moment, just the broken rhythm of our ragged breathing, and the whisper of our lips moving in synchronization. I opened my eyes and found his open, too, staring at my face. It made no sense when he looked at me that way. Like I was the prize rather than the outrageously lucky winner. Our gazes locked for a moment; his brown eyes were so deep that I imagined I could see all the way into his soul. He had the most beautiful soul, more beautiful than his brilliant mind or his incomparable face or his glorious body. He looked back at me as if he could see my soul, too, and as if he liked what he saw. I pulled his face to mine again.
"Definitely staying." He murmured, a moment later.
"No, no. It's your bachelor party. You have to go." I said the words, but the fingers of my right hand locked into his black hair, my left pressed tighter against the small of his back. His warm hand stroked my face.
"Bachelor parties are for people who are single. I'm not single. So there's really no point."
"True." I breathed, against the summer-warm skin of his throat. This was pretty close to my happy place. We were curled up on my small bed, intertwined as much as it was possible. Jacob's shirt was really never on. I never got over the shock of how perfect his body was - tan, warm, and smooth as satin. I ran my hand down his stone chest now, tracing across the abs on his stomach, just marvelling. A light shudder rippled through him, and his mouth found mine again. Carefully, I let the tip of my tongue press against his smooth lips, and he sighed. His sweet breath washed - warm and delicious - over my face. He started to pull away - that was his automatic response whenever he decided things had gone too far, he never kept going because he didn't want to hurt the babies. I though it was ridiculous, but he didn't budge. I knew it was terrifying him that on our honeymoon he had to change those habits now. "Wait." I said, gripping his shoulders and hugging myself close to him. I put one leg around his waist. "Practice makes perfect." He chuckled.
"Well, we should be fairly close to perfection by this point, then, shouldn't we? Have you slept at all in the last month?"
"But this is the dress rehearsal..." I reminded him, "and we've only practiced certain scenes. It's no time for playing safe." I though he would laugh, but he didn't answer, and his body was motionless with sudden stress. The brown in his eyes seemed to Harden from liquid to solid. I thought over my words, realized what he would have heard in them.
"Bella..." He whispered.
"Don't start this again." I said.
"I don't know. It's too hard to concentrate when you're with me like this. I-I can't think straight. I won't be able to control myself. They'll get hurt.
"They'll be fine."
"Bella..."
"Shh!" I pressed my lips to his to stop his panic attack. I'd heard it before. He wasn't getting out of this. He kissed me back for a moment, but I could tell he wasn't as into it as before.
"How are your feet?" He asked. Knowing he didn't mean that literally, I answered,
"Toasty warm."
"Really?"
"Jacob, I'm sure about you. The rest I can live through."
"Can you?" He asked, quietly. "I don't mean the wedding - which I am positive you will survive despite your qualms - but afterward... what about Renee, what about Charlie?" I sighed.
"I'll miss them." Worse, that they would miss me, but I didn't want to give him any fuel.
"Angela and Ben and Jessica and Mike."
"I'll miss my friends, too." I smiled in the darkness. "Especially Mike. Oh Mike! How will I go on?" He growled. I laughed but then was serious. "Jacob, we've been through this and through this. I know it will be hard, but this is what I want. I want you, and I want you forever. Once lifetime is simply not enough for me."
"Bella... I don't know! What if we lose them, I -" I put my hand over his lips.
"Their going to be fine. Now stop. No moping, or I'm calling your brothers to come and get you. Maybe you need a bachelor party."
"I'm sorry. I am moping, aren't I? Must be the nerves."
"Are your feet cold?"
"Toasty warm. I've been waiting what seems like a century to marry you, Miss Swan. The wedding ceremony is the one thing I can't wait-' He broke off mid-though. "Jesus Christ!"
"What's wrong?" He gritted his teeth.
"You don't have to call my brothers. Apparently Embry and Quil are not going to let me bow out tonight." I clutched hum close for one second and then released him. I didn't have a prayer of winning a tug-of-war with Embry.
"Have fun." There was a squeal against the window - someone deliberately scraping their steel nails across the glass to a horrible, cover-your-ears, gloss-bumps-down-your-spine noise. I shuddered.
"If you don't send Jacob out..." Embry - still invisible in the night - hissed menacingly, "we're coming in after him!"
"Go." I laughed. "Before they break my house." Jacob rolled his eyes, but he got to his feet in one fluid movement. He leaned down and kissed me.
"Get to sleep. You've got a big day tomorrow."
"Thanks! That's sure to help me wind down."
"I'll meet you at the altar."
"I'll be the one in the white." I smiled at how perfectly blasé I sounded. He chuckled, and then suddenly sank into a crouch, his muscles coiled like a spring. He vanished - launching himself out my window. Outside there was a muted thud, and I heard Embry curse. "You'd better not make him late." I murmured, knowing they could hear. And then Quil's face was peering in my window, his black har in the weak moonlight that worked through the clouds.
"Don't worry, Bella. We'll get him home in plenty of time." I sat up awkwardly.
"Quil? What do werewolves do for bachelor parties? Your not taking him to a strip club, are you?"
"Don't tell her anything!" Embry growled from below. There was another thud, and Jacob laughed quietly.
"Relax."Quil told me. "We wolves have our own version."
"Thanks, Quil." He winked and dropped out of sight. It was completely silent outside. I lay back against my pillow, sleepy now, I stared at the walls of my little room, bleached pale in the moonlight, from under heavy lids. My last night in my room. My last night as Isabella Swan. Tomorrow night, I would be Bella Black. Though the while marriage ordeal was a thorn in my side, I had to admit that I liked the sound of that. I let my mind wander idly for a moment, expecting sleep to take me. But, after a few minutes, I found myself more alert, anxiety creeping back into my stomach, twisting it into uncomfortable positions. The bed seemed to hard, too cold without Jacob in it. It was going to be a very long day tomorrow.