Why am I like this?

Now to this day I maintained that Angela was a fucking brat. That she was a young skank and just one of those girls who lied to themselves and everyone around them. So, the next week when I was coming home from a pot session with Jacob, Alice and Jasper. I at first saw them and chose to stay the fuck out of it. But when I heard Angela's sobs and begging from my opened window. I rolled my eyes put my flip flops on and went outside to hear them.

"But Ben-

"No Angela… I can't anymore. Sarah is noticing things are different… I love you but if she finds out she's gonna ruin us… She'll ruin you.. I – I cant let that happen." The man said sobbing. Angela was sobbing too. I rested my head against the fire escape as I was just around the corner from them. I lit a cigarette and listened.

"So that's just it… we're done it ends here? What about everything we planned Ben I love you."

"Angela I love you too." He said as choked back a sob. I blew out more smoke. Grimacing at the fact that he actually seemed to be telling the truth. "But despite that fact …despite how much we love each other this should have never happened. My life was ruined a long time ago when I did what I did and got married I… didn't think I'd meet you ever. But I'm going to ruin your life and I care about yours too much to do that." He said.

"Ben wait we can run away we can-

"No we can't baby." He said. "People like us can't run away from things like this." He said so quietly. I closed and sucked in a breath at that, not knowing why his words had such a physical impact on me.

"Goodbye Ang," He said crying.

"Bye, I love you Ben." She said as she sobbed. There was a moment of silence and I saw the grown man get into his awaiting car. I stayed hidden for the most part but I knew she'd round the corner and see me. Just when she did she gave me a look of disgust through her tears.

"Are you happy? The snob was just dumped. Unfortunately for you there's no more blackmail material." She said through her cries, running up the fire scape and into her apartment through the window I know she snuck out in. I sighed before I followed her not really knowing why. When I climbed into her room she looked at me incredulously.

"Oh. My. God. Freak GO AWAY' She screeched. "You are such a weird person do you know that!?" She exclaimed through her sobs. The ones I knew that had nothing to do with me. She was laying on her bed crying but had sit up when I intruded on her moment. Despite her insults, and my past judgements I didn't snap back. I just kneeled on the floor in front of her. She looked at me disgusted, then warily, then sadly. Before she started sobbing again. I hesitated as I took her into my arms but when she let me hold her. She spoke.

"You know." She said through her tears as she held me tightly. "I must be the biggest fucking idiot for think he'd just choose me" She exclaimed as she cried. I stroked her hair softly as I let her cry.

"No honey.. you're not you're just-

I said trailing off not even knowing what to say, I suppose I had been in Angela's position once in my life. I wasn't even really that much older than her. But everything from that time in my life seemed like such a blur in this moment… in any moment where I needed it for reference.

"Young." I said finally finding a word that would make sense in this situation as I stroked her hair like the big sister the both of us never really got to have. "One day you're going to meet someone who would risk everything for you regardless of what he has to lose… even if it's a lot or if it's a little. When you meet a man who would risk it all. That's the only time you should take that risk and fall in love." I said giving her words that sounded so wise I don't even know how I strummed them up at all. She didn't say anything but just nodded as she cried into my shirt. Loud teenage, heartbreak sobs. Completely forgetting that I was the poor freak who blackmailed her into wearing her designer clothes to a job interview that she bombed.

-Monday-

After that altercation with Angela, it had been made clear to me that she wasn't going anywhere. The next day she had showed up to my apartment in her school girl uniform rocking back and forth.

I came to get my clothes since you did steal them.

Was all she said before she came into my apartment and never actually left that night. She had been hiding away in her house not going to school too "Heartbroken" to go and everyday I stormed upstairs before work woke her ass up and argued with her making her go. That was another thing I didn't understand. Angela's parents were never home. I mean for the short while that I've lived in New York I always thought her parents were around I mean I had seen them a few times here and there. It was only getting to know her that I realized that her parents were home maybe once in a while. She had a cook that made all her meals, a housekeeper that had basically raised her and a black credit card for anything she needed. This was why I took it upon myself to march my ass up everyday argue the covers off of her and make her get her skanky little ass to school.

Why was I like this?

Why did I care about the stupid teenage rich bitch who had ratted on me for smoking, constantly called me poor and tipped me horribly with her friends when she ate at the restaurant I worked at on purpose. I didn't actually know why, but I knew I needed to figure it out, not because I wanted to know but because there were events in my life that would happen that made it clear that I needed to know.

Why was I like this?

-Friday-

"Okay so what about if I have one?" Maria asked me as she looked at her celery with disgust at the bar. Alice got called into work and Jasper was… I mean being busy rich Jasper. So they left Maria here with me and Jake while we handled a rush hour. I went down to her level.

"Listen to me kid. You are not going to negotiate with me. You are going to eat every single piece of that celery and then you can have your lollipop." I said playing hard ball. She just crossed her arms and huffed jutting out her bottom lip to cry.

"But." She said on the verge of fake tears.

"No." I said sternly cutting it off before she could even try it with me.

"Oh, so you boss around little kids too?" Said Angela's voice from behind me. She had her backpack and she was in her prissy private school girl uniform.

"What do you want brat? I'm busy." I said

"Yeah I can see that." She said sarcastically rolling her eyes.

"I am, I'm watching brat two-point- O over there and we're in the middle of a lunch rush with a bunch of rich snobs." I said not even caring that there were some customers giving me disapproving looks.

"How about this." Angela said to me. "I'll watch my fellow brat here and make sure she eats all her celery. Maybe even take her for a treat afterwards if I can hang in the apartment tonight." She said.

"Fine." I said. "But you're doing your homework in front of me and we are not watching the jersey shore reunion" I said which made her pout- much like Maria over there. Sticking to her word Angela made sure Maria ate all her celery before she took her down the street for some ice cream. Later that night when both Alice and Jasper told me they were both caught up. It was decided that Maria would just sleep at my place and I'd bring both her and Angela to school in the morning considering the fact that I had caught Angela skipping school and going to the mall. Now I had to make sure the fucking girl walked in the building every fuckin day. I don't even know why I made it my responsibility to make sure this kid didn't fall apart. I just did and it was driving me fucking nuts cause I didn't have the time to give a shit… but here I was giving a shit. So that was how I ended up with both Angela and Maria sleeping over my tiny little apartment that night.

"What does fugitive mean?" Maria asked as Angela sat there in front of my TV. Angela was doing Maria's hair in one of those little "French braids" and Maria who seemed to have a new obsession with Angela was eating it all up. Sticking to her side and soaking up everything Angela said like a sponge. I was in the kitchen drinking beer as I made sloppy Joes. Being one of the only things I actually knew how to make perfectly.

"A person whose on the run from the law I think." Angela said as she did her braiding in Maria's hair.

"Oh… well that looks like fun. Maybe I should be a fugitive." Maria said cutely as she ate some candy I told her no to but Angela said yes to. I switched the TV off just as the braid was done.

"Come eat." Was all I said as Angela helped Maria off of her and took her hand. Helping her settle into the seat at the table and putting the food in front of her. I had to admit Angela was a stuck up brat… but she was a good kid. Maybe that's why I just wanted her to stay one. I sat down with them and they started eating Maria going off at the mouth about how there was a magician at her school who had seven fingers. Angela said she didn't believe in magic and that started off a whole other debate. Maria wasn't having it according to her.

Magic was everywhere

It was in the flowers and in the sky and in the weather and magic is what made the world go round! She argued. Angela still challenged her though. I just watched amused, as they went back and forth. That was it that was all the night was supposed to be. But then there was a knock on the door, and like in the movies we all froze.

"You don't have friends who is that?" Angela said. If I wasn't so confused I would've matched her snide remark. But because I was I didn't. I knew Jacob was with his flavor of the week and Jasper and Alice already explained where they would be. No one ever showed up at my house unannounced. Plus. Besides those three people and now Angela… I didn't have friends.

"Don't kill each other." I instructed calmly before I went over to answer the door. When I saw Edward Cullen standing there with his hands shoved in his pockets looking like a lost puppy, my face scrunched up.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" I said. Then immediately shut my eyes because I already knew what was coming.

"Hey! You owe me a dollar!" Screeched Maria in the back. I rolled my eyes before I took one out of my pockets and handed it to the little girl. She looked at the dollar like it was a huge ass prize. Edward who looked a little lost now looked confused… but amused.

"Thanks!" Maria said with a smile before she hopped over happily back to the table. Edward stepped in… Uninvited.

"I need to talk to you." He said to me. When he saw Maria and Angela staring at him… not even trying to hide it. He smiled at them.

"Hello… I'm Edward Cullen." He said waving. I just looked at him annoyed. I prided myself on not having a stick up my ass but really? Who the fuck does that? Who did this guy think he was? Strolling into my fucking house uninvited all suave saying hello to my surrogate children?

"Hello." Angela said with a bright smile. "Angela Webber." She said still looking up at him with a bright smile that she and I both knew was making him uncomfortable. I finally decided to speak after a long awkward silence.

"Angela can you take Maria upstairs to your apartment and show her your piano please?" I said sweetly.

"Sure." Angela said back sarcastically and sweetly to match my tone. She lifted up Maria and placed her on her feet. Before she took her hand and walked her out. I closed the door behind them and crossed my arms over my chest.

"Is there a reason why you're showing up to my house unannounced?" I challenged. He shoved his hands in his pocket again kind of rocking back and forth. I noticed his muscles kind of bulging under his white dress shirt that was rolled up.

"I came to apologize. For… my attitude at the interview. I realized that the way I was acting was rude and what I said was… rude."

"Mhmm." I said calling bullshit he ignored my sarcasm.

"I shouldn't have taken my anger out on you." He said rubbing a hand over his face. Maybe just in that second I pitied him.

That was where it all went to shit Bella… Really. Because it was the feeling of pity that prompted that question. It was that question that prompted that honest answer, and it was that information that prompted our decision.

"What were you angry about?" I asked.

"Honestly?... My ex girlfriend is… getting married" He said. Then he added the last part. "To my best friend." He said.

"Well… I may not be an expert, but do you even have a best friend anymore?" I said sarcastically. He smiled a smile that didn't reach his eyes at what I said.

"I suppose I don't" He muttered I shrugged.

"Just crash the wedding." I suggested easily walking into my kitchen.

"What?" He said amused.

"Yeah just crash it… tell her your undying love for her and she'll think it's the most romantic thing ever. It works in all the movies." I said being truthful.

"Bella… Life is not a movie." He said amused. I just shrugged again.

"I like movies." Was my simple answer.

"Anyways" He said, rolling his eyes at my simpleton of a brain. "Look I just came over here to explain myself regardless. I was having a bad day and I probably was an ass. Usually I wouldn't have apologized but your… speech kind of really stuck out to me." He said truthfully.

"Well" I said walking over to the door still not really understanding why he decided to actually come over here and apologize. I mean he was a dick but why hold onto that? I guess a regular person would be so appreciative of the fact that he came all the way over here making an effort to apologize but like… who cares that much? And why? In fact when I had left his office after my little outburst I would have never spoken about it if Jacob didn't ask. It was all forgotten.

The show must go on. Keep it moving.

"If that's all. I appreciate your apology but I have two girls I really need to get to school on time tomorrow so.." I said with the door open. He just nodded slowly again his hands still in his pockets. He took one step, then two. Then stopped. I eyes him suspiciously.

"Do you still want the job? As my main assistant?" He asked.

"I never really wanted it to be honest." I said. "I'm fine being a waitress." I said truthfully and straight forward. He looked at me like I was crazy, like I was speaking a foreign language and he had no translator.

"I mean in my company there is major room for growth and expansion. You can be more than just a waitress in a few short years if you take the job. We're doing a huge expansion going into movies and entertainment." He said selling me his pitch.

"I'm fine being a waitress. I wouldn't fit in at your office anyways." I said

"You wouldn't need to fit in… you're the head assistant." He said with a grin that made my heart stop. The man was pretty. He was beautiful I would give him that. He had an air about him that attracted people to him, I could see that.

People like that were always dangerous, I always avoided them. But for some reason with him it was like every danger sign was muted.

"I don't think-

"Please?" He said cutting me off. I looked at him curiously. "I need someone like you with this expansion… I need someone whose gonna tell it as it is and skip past the bullshit. I need a hard ass who doesn't give a fuck." He muttered. I just smirked.

"You really want me in your fancy little building doing fancy little jobs in my converse?" I asked him, challenging him. He just smirked before he answered.

"I'll see you Monday, 9:00 AM." Was all he said before he left and I called Maria and Angela back downstairs to brush their teeth and eat. Ignoring the millions of questions they asked me about the handsome man who just showed up unannounced.

-My First Day-

My first day at Cullen and Co publishing was one I wasn't prepared for. Not work wise… but mentally wise. I came into the building with my head held high, ripped jeans tattered converse and leather jacket. I kept my hair in its long natural wavy way… not bothering to even try to look professional because who the hell were we kidding here? They needed me, not the other way around. Plus when I dropped off Angela at school this morning one of her teachers asked me if they could meet with me to discuss her. I told them I wasn't her mother or guardian or anything really. That I was just a neighbour who took it upon myself to make sure she didn't become a crackhead stripper. Or worse a private school dropout crackhead stripper. After blinking at me a few times she still insisted that I come to talk to her. Because I was an active member in her life.

See? I just got myself into these fucking messes.

The same bitch from the other day who insisted I couldn't see Edward looked at me up and down and her face got red.

"I thought we kicked you out?" She sneered. "Listen I don't know why you're here but I will call security-

"Lauren!" Said that girl coming from his office. Renesssa? Renmm? I forget.

"What?" Lauren sneered.

"We hired her… now stop." She instructed calmly. She was standing in the doorway of Edward's office wearing what I call grown up clothes. I remember growing up and looking at my mother wear similar outfits. She was in a black skirt and matching blazer. She had stockings on, a cell phone in her hand and her hair was perfectly waved. She looked professional but still hot.

"Bella." She said to me with a nice smile. I looked at her with one that didn't reach my eyes.

"Hey…. Uh?"

"Renesme." She said smiling brightly." "It's kind of a mouth full, you can just call me Nessie. Or Ness." She said as we walked into Edward's office.

"Or pain in the ass." Edward muttered not looking up from a file he had in his hand. He was dressed smartly in a suit and he kind of made my clit twitch… kind of. Renesme said nothing at that as she poured us all some water that was on Edward's little bar section. She handed me a glass and I took it graciously. Edward finally looked up from his file and they both smiled at me softly. I scrunched up my face.

"Okay Bella lets get you briefed on your job." Renesme said sitting down beside Edward. "As you know the company is going through a huge expansion. We're the leading publisher in places like Australia, England, all over Europe and of course-

"New York." They both said.

"Yes, Yes Edward is so great and powerful… so what exactly will I be doing?" I asked with my arms crossed. Renesme just smirked at Edward.

"I like her." Was all she said before she went to a drawer in Edwards desk and pulled out a huge manila envelope.

"You're Renesme's new partner. You guys are the bridge of communication between the New York office and the rest of the world." Edward instructed.

"Basically… we run his life. Personal and private." Renesme said I looked between the two of them. I looked at how Renesme seemed to be in synch with everything Edward did. If he reached out for something she knew what it was. She fixed his tie, she finished his sentences and she even sometimes literally spoke for him.

This guy was fucking babied to the max.

"Ok" was all I said. Knowing men like him and knowing what they needed. Edward was like my father and though I loathed the man, I knew how to deal with him. Atleast I used to.

"Great so just fill out your work emergency contacts." Renesme instructed handing me a huge paper booklet with questions about my personal information. I looked at all the shit they wanted to know.

"I don't have any of this stuff." I said looking at various spots where they requested my high school, place of birth, moms number dads number emergency contact.

"You don't have an emergency contact? Or parents?" Edward challenged with a quirked eyebrow.

"You know some people have dead parents? Its possible?" I said to him with an eye roll. He looked kind of taken aback almost apologetic. But he didn't need to be. I took the huge booklet demanding answers and closed it. I picked up a sticky pad and scribbled stuff on it.

Name-Bella Victoria Dwyer.

Alice- Friend 888-9893

Jasper- Friend 888-9898

Angela-Brat (Surrogate child) 888-0906

From-Nevada

High school- High school of Nevada.

I smiled happily at all the information there was to know about me on the post it. I handed it to Angela who took it with a raised eyebrow.

"That's all the information on me… No need for the twenty page document. It'll save everyone a lot of fucking time." I said with a smile as I crossed my arms over my chest. She just looked at Edward and shrugged. Happy she had less information that she had to trudge through and input in some database.

"Alright Bella… Welcome to the team. Lets get started." Edward said with a little smile.