Aftermath
Chapter 22
Robert smiled as Cora perused the village's little shops. She loved to window shop and had excellent taste. She picked things out for their grandchildren, sons-in-law, Edith and even Mary.
If anything, the trip was reminding Robert of their first trip to Switzerland. He had come back from the South African War broken, both physically and mentally. Bates had taken a bullet for him and should have lost his leg, but seeing it really bothered him. He had also been injured but the battle started upon his arrival home. His father had died, and Robert was thrust into being Lord Grantham when he was ill-prepared. He knew how to run the estate. It was what he was raised to do, but one catastrophic night proved that he couldn't mentally handle it.
"Robert, could you please sleep in here with me tonight? You were gone for two years and have barely slept in here since you got home. I miss you." Cora asked.
"I don't want to keep you awake." Robert said. He was sitting on the tiny bed in his dressing room and Cora was standing in the doorway from her bedroom.
"You'll keep me awake by not being there." Cora argued.
"Alright." Robert said, more to appease his wife. He followed her into the bedroom they had shared before he went to war and climbed into bed next to her. Cora leaned over and gave him a long kiss. She was obviously wanting to make love, but that was another thing that Robert was not ready for.
"Do you want to do anything else? We haven't since you arrived home and your mother keeps bringing up an announcement of an upcoming birth." Cora asked.
"I just want to sleep. Good night." Robert answered. He rolled over away from Cora and squeezed his eyes shut, willing himself to sleep.
"Good night. I love you." Cora said before kissing Robert's temple and settling against his back. Eventually Robert heard her breathing slow and knew she was asleep. He intended on sneaking out of bed, but her breathing was rhythmic, and he fell asleep.
The next thing he knew, he was in the middle of a nightmare and was trying to strangle one of his enemies with his bare hands. The problem with his nightmare was the enemy had been a man, but the choking sounds were from a woman. He opened his eyes and noticed the terrified look on Cora's face. He was straddling her and had his hands around her tiny neck.
"Robert…I can't breathe. It hurts!" Cora said. Robert immediately realized what he had done and threw his hands up in the air. He jumped off the bed and started backing away from Cora, who was still coughing and sputtering.
"I'm…so sorry…Call the doctor if you need to." Robert said before he exited the bedroom. He didn't even bother going back to his dressing room, instead going downstairs and drinking himself into oblivion. It was the only way he would get any real rest.
"You looked like you were a thousand miles away." Cora said. They were walking back to the chalet, holding hands and holding packages.
"Just thinking about that night that I almost killed you." Robert said.
"Oh, dear. Robert, you were just home from a war. I understood." Cora said.
"You shouldn't have had to. The bruises the next morning? I felt horribly." Robert said.
"I hid them well. Thank goodness for high Victorian collars. Robert, you haven't thought about that in years. Why now?" Cora asked.
"I don't know. I remember I was so scared to be around you or the girls after that. Terrified I would hurt you." Robert said.
"I don't think you could have ever hurt the girls. You just needed the ice broke so you could deal with what happened in South Africa. It just took time and privacy." Cora said. They had arrived at the chalet and walked in. Robert sat the bags and boxes down and gave Cora a long kiss.
"Thank God for you." Robert said again.
"I think the same about you. So, do you want me to heat up one of those casseroles?" Cora asked.
"That sounds good. I'll put this away." Robert answered. She went into the kitchen to prepare their dinner while Robert tidied up. How simple their life was in Switzerland? Maybe they needed the simplicity.