An alarm begins bleating next to Star's head. Star's wand slowly rises up, in her hand, and points straight at the alarm. Before she does anything the alarm gallops off. She brings the wand back under her pillow. Three new alarms come racing out from under stuff. The wand shoots back up, but she can't pick a target, swivelling back and forth. Five more alarms come out from under pizza boxes and clothes. The wand looks around confused then slumps down. Star shoots up from her bed. "Okay. I am awake." The clocks all go silent, looking expectantly "Wait. It's Saturday." Star starts shooting wildly around her room. The clocks scamper for cover. Star lies back down. After a couple seconds the first alarm clock sneaks back out and crawls up on Star's bed, settles down next to her head comfortably, and then blares louder and more obnoxiously. "Gawww!"

Cut to Margo coming in from a run. She looks tired but very fulfilled. She cleans out her water bottle and then grabs a drink out of the tap water flow. Margo turns to leave but suddenly she sees Star in the door, still in her nightgown l, her hair crazy, and looking manic. "Oh, hi Star." Margo sounds at least a little worried by the grinning apparition in the doorway. "Isn't this a bit early for you without school?" She laughs nervously.

"Margo." Star steps forward looking still more deranged. "I have been cleaning. I have done so much, but more always remain. I need you. You, and your skills. The mess goes on and on."

"Star, you are scaring me. I am going to shower, then I can help you clean your room." Margo scooches around Star to leave the room, walks up the stairs then her head reappears between the posts. "And no spooky prospector vibe when I get out." Margo heads off, but Star rushes up the stairs to the bathroom door.

"I've been cleaning. Do you realize how bad it is?" Star is whispering creepily.

"That!" Margo cries out through the bathroom door. "Cut that out!"

Cut to Star's room, it is still a mess, maybe a little better. Margo walks in wearing her red hoodie and a short blue skirt. Margo calls out, "Uhh so you are cleaning?"

Margo hears ruckus up top, followed by a strained, "Yes, help." Margo starts to clean up, sorting the mess as she goes. "Margo… Help!" Star croaks out her need.

Margo only suddenly realizes what is happening. "Oh, where are you?"

Star is obviously barely able to speak, "The… Top… Of… The… Stairs…"

Margo runs up the stairs to find Star being strangled by a pink cardigan. "Hiya!" Margo starts karate-ing the item of clothing. It doesn't actually work, but the sweater is distracted, leaving Star free.

"Life Taking Llama Blast!" Llama's pour out of her wand, and slowly sap the vigor of the sweater. It returns to being a regular item of clothing.

"Star, when have you ever worn this."

"Once, but I didn't like the fit that much. So I made it a magical living sweater, for dancing and stuff. Unfortunately I don't think it liked the idea of being made inanimate again."

Margo just stares for a second. "Star, isn't that… killing."

"No, of course not…" Star stares off thinking. "Uhhh… no. No I don't think sooo…"

"But, Star…"

"Shush. It just isn't…"

"Well, how many things did you give life?"

Star stares into Margo's eyes. A herd of ringing alarm clocks pass between the two.

"Star!"

"I was counting!"

"Well!"

"It was a lot Margo, it was a lot."

"I love you, I believe in you, and regularly leave my life in your hands, but I'm not certain you should have that wand."

"Margo! That is not helping!" As Star yells a full troop of makeup and brushes dance a ballet past the two.

Margo sighs. "We need help."

Cut to a montage of Buff Frog using cunning to hunt down clocks, who invariably escape, Margo uselessly karate chopping a Stuffed Elephant which tramples her, River, spear in hand, charging a tribe of sweaters and jacket, only to be entangled, Star pointing her wand at a standing lamp, before being surrounded by desk lamps, who overwhelm her, stray llamas flying uselessly, and Kelly fruitless swinging a battle axe at eyelash curlers and mascara brushes lodging it into the floor before an aggressive makeover.

An exhausted Margo and Star stand in front of the three defeated warriors. "Do you think Tom could, you know," Margo tries to imitate an angry Tom summoning Hellfire.

"No fire, it could spread." Star points to a stack of magazines, in front of a collection of dried leaves and flowers which partially obscures large paper mache sculptures of kids from school.

"Good point. What about Skullnick?"

"I called her before dad. No answer"

"Hmm… I hate to say it but what about Pony…" Margo is interrupted.

"Hey guys," Janna is standing in Star's door, "I was in Margo's room earlier and heard everything. So I ran to the swap meet and that weird dude had this." Janna pulls out a rubber halloween bat.

Margo looks at the bat and back at Janna, "Great but I'm not sure we can scare them away. At least, not that easily."

Star is struck with inspiration, "Maybe we can bring back Hungry…"

A defeated Mr. Diaz shoots up from behind River and Buff Frog, "NOOOOOOOO!" and then falls back down. "Please, not that, Star."

"It's not to scare them, Diaz. It sucks souls from inanimate objects. And if the arm was real, then maybe this is too. Or not, but" she looks around, "you guys are out of options."

Star and Margo look at each other and shrug. In unison, "Okay, Janna."

"Good, but the incantation will take a few minutes, sooo... I'll need protection."

River props himself up with his spear. "Once more unto the cleaning, dear friends, once more." And the rest slowly rise, with weapons or fists raised.

Janna begins chanting in a strange guttural language. And the bat becomes a cute skinny dracula whose fanged lips part, and begin inhaling souls. At this tug to the essence of their life, the belongings turn vicious, red eyes appearing all pointed at Janna.

Kelly is suddenly concerned, "Wait, who is to say we are no more than souls bound to inanimate carbon, made living by our own desires no different from Star's things, for what is life but a deep abiding magic in us all."

Star stands heroically, raising her wand towards an army of her own making, "Too late Kelly."

The lights flicker as the toy consumes. Star's wand flashes waricorns and narwhals. Mr Diaz throws punches from a boxing pose, impossibly light on his feet. Margo kicks and chops. Kelly chops but falls back in despair, coming back to back with River, they share a smile before charging forward in opposite directions. Buff Frog and Mrs. Diaz team up to push back a stuffed animal charge. A very frightened Starfan13 and Tad hold tight to Janna as the toy grows fat on souls. All seems lost as leggings and a comforter leap for Janna, but there is Queen Moon, in butterfly form to save her with magic. Soon Janna falls silent, and a very fat Dracula closes his rubber jaw in satisfaction.

The room is quiet before the sound of dropping, and breaking, commences. The band of brothers and sisters in arms look around, unable to believe the war is won. A sigh of relief goes out before River begins a victorious bellow that all, but Moon, join.

Cut to dimensional tears for everyone. Star thanks everyone as they leave.

"Thanksssss."

Buff Frog: "You babysit Tuesday."

"Love you guys"

Moon: "I hope you learned something about responsibility, young Lady."

River: "This counts for a birthday present!"

"So great you came"

Starfan13: "Th..thanks… for… for including me."

"Oh my gosh, you were a total life saver"

Kelly: "I need to get Tad home"

Tad: softly crying atop Kelly's head

With that only the Diazs and a very smug Janna remain.

Mr. Diaz looks happy and tired, "Oh, this reminds me of the good old days."

"Honey, our wild days should remain behind us, and Star... Well listen to your mother, mothers know best."

The two walk out holding each other.

Margo looks down at her tights. "Gah, these are ripped. This was the first time I wore them." She leaves distracted.

Only Star and Janna remain. Star looks at the chubby rubber bat on a string. "Uhh how… how much do I owe you."

"Don't sweat it, twelve dollars for a soul consuming bat is pretty cool."

"That was only twelve dollars!"

"He threw in these, too." Janna puts on glasses with fallout eyeballs. "Awesome."

Star stares in disbelief, collects herself and then says cheerily, "Get home safe."

"Oh no, I'm gonna sleep under Margo's bed and touch her hand if it falls over the side. It's definitely a sleepover night."

Star takes it in cheery stride, "See you in the morning!"

Janna waving goodnight behind her back, "You normally don't."

Star looks around her room, a much bigger mess than ever before, sighs happily, and says to herself, "Cleaning is good for the soul."

A translucent Glossarick appears. "It's not cleaner."

"Go away imaginary Glossarick."

"Lesson 22, post me: do not give life willy nilly."

"Go away imaginary Glossarick!"