A/N- Sorry for the wait! Just couldn't seem to get it right.

Alec stumbled as his feet hit solid ground, almost listing completely forward from the force with which the portal had spat him out. He suspected he would have done, had he not caught himself on the arm of the sofa. His knees hit the floor painfully.

There was a soft swish as the portal snapped shut behind him. A concerned hand set to his back and he glanced up to see Clary stood over him, eyes bright with anxiety.

"I'm fine," Alec muttered, pushing himself to his feet.

Clary watched him a moment, as if hesitating to speak. "Alec, what your dad said… it wasn't okay, and you know he's wrong, don't you? About you and Magnus. It doesn't matter that you're both guys, or that he's a downworlder."

Alec just stared at her a while. It was strange really. On their initial meeting, Alec had thought her childish and troublesome, but he now realised that if she hadn't called him out on his blatant infatuation with Jace, he might never have accepted his sexuality. If it weren't for her, he might never have met Magnus.

What a grey world that would be.

"Alec…?"

"Yes, I know he's wrong," replied Alec finally, taking in a steadying breath. "He was just trying to hurt me. I don't intend on letting him win." He cleared his throat, banishing any lingering tightness from the hurt of his father's words. "Thanks for the warding rune… and for making the portal. I don't know what I would've done without you there."

She blinked and nodded uncertainly, clearly not expecting such sincere praise. Alec patted her shoulder.

"I should clean up," he muttered, absently lifting a hand to the blood staining the skin above his eye.

He didn't wait for Clary to reply. Taking off to the bathroom, he left his fellow shadowhunter in the main room, flicking the light on before closing and locking the door behind him.

Turning, Alec braced his hands against the edges of the sink-bowl, bowing his head and forcing deeper breaths. Heat stung his eyes and he shook his head to banish it. This was not the time to break down. There was no telling what kind of state Magnus would be in when Jace and Isabelle brought him back here, and Alec couldn't risk showing weakness.

The urge to cry was almost overwhelming and Alec roughly twisted the cold tap, filling his hands to splash water over his face. The blood took some work to remove, but Alec had time. It would be a while until Magnus was back home, back with Alec where he belonged. Worst-case scenarios filled Alec's head and he shook himself to scatter them, grabbing a towel to pat his face dry.

"It's okay," he whispered aloud, just for himself, just breathing a moment. "It's okay. It's okay."

He spoke it like a mantra, a prayer to the angel, a promise to himself.

Part of him knew he should call Jace. They shouldn't be at the apartment; Robert would hunt Magnus down and this would be the first place he looked. Despite that fear, Alec's phone remained untouched in his pocket. He wanted Magnus home, he needed familiarity, needed to curl up with his boyfriend and know that they were safe in this apartment.

It wasn't fair and Alec hated it.

It wasn't fair that he couldn't feel that way in the institute, that he knew Magnus would never be safe around shadowhunters because any one of them could wish to do him harm. His father had shown his true colours along with several Clave guards. Yet, so had Underhill, Alec reminded himself. The man had stood with him against Robert to protect Magnus. Shadowhunters coming together against The Clave to protect a downworlder. Something about that teamwork was so incredible.

He shoved himself away from the sink with a heavy sigh, fishing the stele from his pocket and started to lift it to his healing rune, but stopped suddenly. It didn't feel right to light his stele, run it across his rune, so he didn't. Maybe he wanted to keep the pain. Maybe he wanted to punish himself for Magnus.

It didn't matter. Alec didn't heal himself.

Exiting the bathroom, he went straight for the sofa and sat himself down. He didn't say a word to Clary, who stood staring out the balcony doors, and she didn't say a word to him. The silence wasn't an awkward one. It wasn't comfortable either; it was crushing.

They spent what seemed like hours in silence, Alec unable to sit still, having to push himself from the sofa and pace around every few minutes. If he sat too long, he could do nothing but think, and every thought was of Magnus. He considered every scenario, considered that Magnus could be badly hurt when he came through that door. Part of him wondered if Magnus would even come home.

He quashed that thought down until it disappeared. Magnus wasn't dead. He couldn't be. Alec would have known; he would've felt it. Maybe it was stupid of him to believe that, but he couldn't help it. Grief made him sentimental.

When the front door opened, Alec still wasn't prepared for who came through.

Everything he had been expecting, from Magnus to Jace, Clave guards to his father, the person he hadn't even considered to show up here was—

"Simon?"

The vampire cast him a heavy look—a look that screamed pity and grief—but he went straight for Clary, melting into the hug she wrapped him in. For a second, Alec remained entirely confused and disappointed, but three more figures pushed their way through the door. Simon wasn't alone.

"Magnus," Alec gasped breathlessly, rushing to embrace him.

Isabelle and Jace, the latter of whom had been a crutch for the warlock, ducked away as Alec wrapped his arms around his boyfriend. The door closed behind them and Alec breathed steadily for the first time in what could have been days, because they were finally safe.

Magnus winced at the contact of the hug, a soft hiss of pain exhaled from his lips, but he clutched Alec like he would never let go. In turn, Alec buried his face in Magnus's shoulder, his body racked with a shuddering inhale as he tried to fight back the tears that stung his eyes.

"I'm so sorry," he whispered. "Magnus, I'm so sorry."

Magnus shook his head, his fingers clawing into Alec's shirt. "Don't," he muttered simply. "It wasn't your fault."

Alec turned his head to press a kiss against Magnus's temple. "I love you."

"Love you too."

Magnus grunted softly as he pulled away, weary gaze searching across Alec's face. He lifted a hand to absently touch the bruised skin around the cut above Alec's eye. It stung, but Alec didn't dare pull away. The twinge of hurt was nothing compared to the warmth that encased his heart. Magnus was here.

The warmth was frozen almost instantly when he focused on Magnus's wrists.

"You're hurt."

The words didn't come from his mouth and Alec almost laughed at Magnus's observation, only preventing himself when he realised how insane that would make him look. After everything—all the pain and torment he had been subjected to by The Clave—Magnus still wasn't worried for himself. He was never worried for himself. Usually Alec loved Magnus's selfless and giving nature, but he couldn't bring himself to love it now.

Settling on a weak smile, Alec gently brushed his fingers to Magnus's forehead, gesturing to his own injury. "Guess we match, huh?"

Magnus's expression twisted softly into something Alec couldn't quite place. "That's a nice way of looking at it," he murmured.

Something lost entered his eyes then and Alec's brow furrowed in an anxious frown. Slowly, as if in a trance, Magnus moved his hand to Alec's cheek. The golden cat's eyes drifted across the shadowhunter's concerned countenance, and Alec gently squeezed Magnus's hip, trying to ground him, trying to ease his distant expression.

"Alexander," said Magnus, too faint to be considered okay. His eyes searched across Alec's face. "I… I think I'm dreaming again…"

Frown deepening, Alec's mouth opened to speak, but there was no time to plan the words, let alone get them out before Magnus's eyes rolled back and his legs buckled beneath him.

"Steady," warned Alec, grabbing his boyfriend as he threatened to collapse right on the spot. "It's alright. Hold on to me, okay?" Alec gently pressed two fingers beneath Magnus's chin, tilting his head up. "Magnus, what can I do? Tell me how to help you."

Letting his head against Alec's shoulder, Magnus blinked up at him through painfully narrowed eyes. "I need… Catarina," he muttered, swallowing thickly. "Alec, I… I want to wake up…"

"You are awake, sweetheart," Alec insisted, tightening his grip on his boyfriend. "It's alright. We'll get Catarina here." He cast a desperate glance to his sister. "Izzy—"

"I'll call her," Isabelle promised, phone already in hand.

Alec glanced down to Magnus, squeezing him tighter against his side. "You can rest while we wait for her. Are you okay to walk?" He didn't receive a reply, Magnus's heavily-lidded eyes slipping shut and struggling to open in lethargic blinks. "Magnus…?"

When his eyes closed and didn't open, Magnus's head lolled forward and he became deadweight in Alec's grasp. The shadowhunter cursed softly, fighting to keep him upright and pressing urgent fingers to the pulse point against his throat. The thrum of his pulse was faint, but still present. He was alive.

Jace rushed to try and help him, but Alec pushed him away, stubbornly refusing his help. Alec ducked to haul Magnus up into his arms, cradling his limp body tight against his chest, face half-hidden in Magnus's hair as he turned to the bedroom.

"I've got you," he vowed in an undertone, squeezing his eyes shut in a second of overwhelming grief. "I've got you."

The wait for Catarina was painful, even if the delay was only a couple of minutes.

Alec settled Magnus in their shared bed, busying himself in removing the warlock's shoes and jewellery in attempt to make him as comfortable as possible. It was probably in vain, as Alec was admittedly unsure whether or not Magnus was even aware of his surroundings. The warlock remained stubbornly unconscious.

When Catarina opened the door to the bedroom—having portalled in a few moments ago and already strengthened the warding around the loft—she made Alec leave.

Despite his initial, instinctive protests, Alec knew it was a wise move. He would just be in the way. Still, his mood was dampened further from lack of contact with his boyfriend, and the others wisely kept a careful distance and a respectful silence as Alec paced his way back and forth in front of the balcony doors.

The occasional glitch of light would escape from beneath the bedroom door, a jolt of Catarina's magic flashing so intensely that it sent streaks of light dashing from every tiny gap. Alec would pause every time, watching and waiting for Catarina to emerge. When she didn't, he resumed the restless pacing.

It went on that way for what felt like an age before Jace finally had enough.

"Hey," he murmured as he approached his brother, intercepting his path and setting a gentle hand to his shoulder to keep him in place. "Come and sit down. You're not doing yourself, or Magnus, any favours by wearing yourself out."

There was a long silence, in which Alec did nothing but stare. "What did they do to him?" he asked finally, his voice coming out smaller than he would have liked. He wasn't even sure that he wanted an answer.

Jace exchanged a heavy glance with Isabelle, who stood leaned against the far wall with Simon, before beckoning for Alec to follow him. Alec stayed, reluctant to be away from Magnus's room, but Jace only wandered a few paces away, sitting himself down on the sofa with a deep sigh. Still a little hesitant, Alec followed.

"It was mainly the shackles they put on him when he was arrested," Jace informed, his voice careful and quiet, as if he feared Alec's reaction. "The runes… They really did a number on him, Alec."

Alec worked his jaw in displeasure, angling his head away from Jace's words and the pain they caused him.

"You know it wasn't your fault, right?" said Jace, glancing to him, grabbing his brother's arm as Alec scoffed softly. "Hey. Listen to me. It wasn't you. Aldertree hates downworlders; Magnus was just… a convenient target."

"Yeah, and why was it that he's so 'convenient' again? Oh, that's right, because I got him to stay at the institute, even though I knew he felt uncomfortable being there. Because he was surrounded by people who would rather see him imprisoned than share a living space with him. I guess they all got what they wanted."

There was pressure on his arm, almost hard enough to hurt, and Alec let his eyes meet Jace's finally. "You know better than anyone that you don't tell Magnus what to do. If he had wanted to leave, he would've left. He made a choice, and you need to respect that."

Alec inhaled a shaking breath that made Jace blink rapidly at him, a worried crease to his brow. "I can't let him get hurt again, Jace. I can't… I don't know what I'd do if something like this happened again. I don't even know what to do now. I dragged you all into this. We can't ever go back to the institute. None of you can go home."

"Don't worry about us," murmured Jace. "It was our choice too."

There was a soft sound as the bedroom door opened just wide enough for Catarina to slip through, closing it behind her once she stood in the main room. Alec pushed himself up from the sofa, approaching her with hurried steps. He didn't even try to disguise his concern.

"How is he?" asked Alec instantly, eyes rapidly scanning Catarina's face for hints of sorrow or hope.

The warlock just stared up at him, some pain in her expression, but not enough for it to be deadly serious. "He's sleeping. I've healed what I can, bandaged up the rest." She took a steadying breath. "Alec, what they did to him… it would have been excruciatingly painful. That kind of pain tends to linger."

"It was bad, like… enough to trigger his memories?"

Catarina nodded softly and Alec swallowed past the grief lumping his throat. They both knew Magnus's past, about what happened to his mother and stepfather, and they knew that prolonged pain, like what The Clave had delivered, generally forced Magnus into a flashback of that memory. Last time, Magnus had cried for hours after divulging the memory to Alec.

"Whatever damage is visible on his skin will fade a lot faster than the pain he feels on the inside," Catarina confirmed the shadowhunters fears, touching Alec's arm in a show of support. "Be gentle with him, okay? But don't let him push you away because, whether he knows it or not, he needs you right now."

Alec nodded, his heart weighing heavy in his chest. This was his fault. Magnus was taken because of him, because their relationship had disgusted his father so much that he had set out to have the warlock killed. Every spare moment, Alec thought of Magnus being dragged away from him. If he paused, even for a second, that memory would surface again.

Blinking hard to force the tears back, Alec absently pinched his hand hard enough to hurt. "Can I see him?"

"Yes," said Catarina, opening the door behind her. "Just be quiet in there. Don't wake him."