"hailey, i'm so sorry. i couldn't help myself."
hailey nods, unable to look away from the bruising on his bare chest and gauze covering his wound. "i know, jay."
she knows she needs to walk away; she can feel her breathing start to quicken and the familiar burning in her throat. for a split second, she thought her partner was dead and how can you just get over something like that? there was blood and she managed to keep calm in the moment, but now, she's deteriorating.
hailey pats his good shoulder, shooting him a small smile. "rest up. i should go—" she doesn't even know what excuse to give him that he will believe, but she can feel her eyes stinging and she knows she has to get out of there.
jay softly grabs her hand as it slips away from his shoulder. she tries turning around, but he tugs gently. "hailey," he whispers and ducks his head so he can catch her eye. "are you okay?"
by this point, hailey's bottom lip is quivering and her eyes glistening. "i thought you were dead," her voice breaks, but she refuses to cry. he idly notices the commotion around them slowly dying and filtering away. "i heard gun shots, and you were lying on the ground and there was blood and i thought you were dead."
he gently pulls her until she's seated in the rig beside him. she seems to be experiencing some sort of residual shock and he can't help but feel guilty. "i'm sorry i put you through that."
"that's the thing," she laughs bitterly. "you keep apologizing, but you keep doing it."
jay's eyes narrow slightly. "this is my job; i can't promise i won't get hurt."
"your job is to have backup, jay," hailey snaps. "your job is to follow instructions and protect yourself. you almost got killed!"
"but i didn't," he replies, hoping to calm her.
he doesn't.
"you should have let us handle it. or you should have waited for us," she tells him. jay is slightly angled so he can watch her face and she finally looks at him.
this time, it's jay's eyes that glisten. "he killed my dad, hailey."
despite her hard facial features, she places a hand on his knee. "i know," she says softly, "but i don't ever want to find your bloody body like that again."
he nods, understandingly. "i really am sorry, hailey. for everything," he ducks his head again, trying to catch her eye. she keeps avoiding his eyes for fear she'll start crying again. "i was a dick to you these past couple of days."
she lets out a snort and he almost smiles. "yeah, you were," she agrees. "but i can hold my own."
"i know you can," he replies honestly. "this partnership works so well because you call me out on my shit; don't stop doing that."
hailey finally smiles. "i won't. someone has to keep your ego in check."
he hesitantly grabs her hand that was still placed on his knee. "are we good?"
she turns her hand over so it can fully grasp his. "yeah, jay. we're good; we'll always be good."
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