Nnoitra sighed as he made his way to Szayel's room- or more like the room they used to share until all of this happened. He didn't blame Szayel as much as blamed himself for acting so foolishly.

But it doesn't do me any good to beat myself up more, he reminded himself, remembering all he had talked about with Greg. Maybe I should get that number tattooed on my arm or something, because it might be handy if I forget everything. Or need to talk to Greg.

Nnoitra didn't know why, but he felt like he had made a friend. Which was weird as Greg was human, but it didn't matter. What mattered right now was Szayel.

I am sorry for making you mad, Nnoitra thought to himself as he stared at the hotel door. He paused a moment before he knocked, hoping his husband was in there.

"What is it?" the annoyed butterfly replied, clearly upset. "Let me moap in peace. You got to moap all you wanted and I-"

"Szayel," Nnoitra hated romantic confusions. "I am sorry."

"What for? Mocking me with that purse and trying to shove me out of the closet? That's not nice at all. Sorry is not going to fix this. Even today, people get shoved out into the world and get disowned. Or killed, even. I don't want to talk about this. I... I know you only want me to be myself. I like that. I want to be- I always have. Don't you know that's why I have pink hair? Because then I wouldn't be able to hide who I was. I guess in a way, that's what I wanted. I was tired. I am tired to hiding- but I can't rid of the fear that everyone will hate me. I guess they already kind of do- but it's because I will eat them alive. Starting with the legs."

Nnoitra found himself smiling at this remark. Szayel was still Szayel and he was glad.

"But..." the voice continued from the other side of the door, "I...don't have anything else to say. It hurts that you don't understand and in a way, I am glad you don't. Because someone needs to be brave."

"...Szayel," Nnoitra began after checking to make sure the hallway was in fact empty. "I wasn't brave. I was stupid."

"Well, I am glad you finally admitted it," Szayel's snarky voice noted with detain, making Nnoitra sigh heavily.

He was trying!

Yumichika crept through the halls once he found his sword again. He wanted to get out of here, but he wouldn't pass up a chance to gain any inside info on Nelliel. He peeked into the throne room on his search for an exit and was suddenly confused. What was a group of hollows having a sleepover for? With sleeping bags, marshmallow and even a campfire. What what was even more strange, was everyone was painting their nails and playing truth or dare.

This is truly disturbing...the Soul Reaper thought to himself as he starting trying another hallway of white doors.

One of these had to open.

"Szayel," Nnoitra tried again- because he wasn't going to give up this time. Nnoitra Gilga was a quitter no longer. Yes. He quit quitting. Hey, it was a new year! Anyhow, he tried knocking on the door again as he spoke. "Can I please come in and talk to you? I am sorry for not understanding. I am not from that era. I think I was some person from China. See, I went there to find a phone and I could read all the signs perfectly- even though they weren't in Japanese. And you know how I don't like reading, yes?"

"Yeah," Szayel said, sounding irritated, "I do. It's so annoying. I have so many books I wanted to share with you and you won't even try to read them. I almost broke up with you over that, but I... I liked you too much."

"...I am touched to hear it," the mantis told the other Espada who he happened to love way too much as well.

"You?" Szayel had to know, "touched?"

"Yeah," Nnoitra was going to have to admit he had feelings, even if he didn't like them. "I guess I have been reading too many mushy books. But anyhow, it's hard for me to read Japanese. For me anyways, because it's not my natural language."

"What?" Szayel demanded, "you don't think it was had for me? I am from England. We speak English. Which is what we are speaking right now."

"I noticed," Nnoitra admitted, realising he hadn't thought about this fact until now.

"In fact," Szayel said happily, "this whole story is in English."

"It's not," Nnoitra hated to point it out, but he had to. "Telsa speaks some German and what does the language of this story have to do with anything?"

"I donno. But I was trying to tell you that reading and your lack of reading skills have nothing to do wit h this."

"It... doesn't, I know," Nnoitra hoped Szayel would understand what he was trying to get across, but as usual, it wasn't the case. "What I was trying to say is that I am from another era that I don't even remember and so I don't know how you..."

He was going to say it.

Even though he wasn't sure if he should or wanted to.

"Feel."

Yumichika almost fell backwards as one of the white doors finally opened. He hoped he didn't make too much noise as he stumbled, but he could hear laughter from the throne room. There was no way anyone heard him- he was pretty sure. Anyhow, Yumichika regained his balance and crept into the room which was still lit- oddly enough. He didn't think much about the room until he noticed the window was wide open.

Yes! The soul reaper crept over to the escape, but only found himself pausing as he got a look. A look at the lamp on the nightstand.

There was silence on the other side of the hotel door and for a moment, Nnoitra worried he said too much. But he was soon standing before Szayel who gestured for him to enter.

"I...can tell you're trying," the pink-haired Espada noted with a small smile. "I appreciate it. I just... today's been crazy and..." He paused to glance down at the floor. "I want you to understand."

"thanks," Nnoitra wasn't sure if he should hug Szayel or not-so decided to error on the safe side and did. "I am here to listen and understand."

"Cool," Szayel blushed a bit as he closed the door behind Nnoitra who realised the butterfly was far more insecure than he would ever let anyone know. He never used that word before and Nnoitra would have been worried if he didn't already talk about this thing called feelings.

It was uncomfortable, but he did.

I am proud of myself, he smiled to himself and took a seat in the chair by the window. He was silent until Szayel asked why he was being quiet. "I was waiting for you to speak."

"Oh. Sorry," Szayel glanced away again and fixed his glasses. "I don't... usually have people's attention unless I yell. But now that I have your attention, I don't know what to say. I really don't. But maybe listen to someone else?"

Nnoitra raised an eyebrow, "someone else?" There was no one else in this room.

"I don't know if got the chance to tell you in all of the chaos that happened, but it seems there is still a part of my old soul in here with me. It's really weird, but... maybe he can talk to you. I don't remember enough- only the feelings really."

"Um, okay," Nnoitra wasn't freaked out by this AT ALL, but he understood why Szayel hadn't had the time to tell him sooner."I can talk to him, if you want."

"Sure. I'll still be here, but I think... he can talk to you." the espada wasn't sure- it was weird for him as well. I assume you can talk to him anyways.

I can, Alair replied, wondering what good this would do. I am not spilling all my feelings to him.

Well, you had better, Szayel noted with a scowl. Because I love him deeply and if you don't, I will crush what is left of you.

I understand.

Yumichika almost screamed, but he suddenly realised the leg was one of a hollow's. So it was suddenly not as gruesome. Interesting more like. I wonder if hollows make furniture out of other hollows. Makes sense, there are hardly any trees...

A thought that was reaffirmed as he looked out the window at the barren desert before him. Yumichika didn't have time to ponder and so hastily climbed out the window without another thought. He only paused to make sure his sword was at his side before beginning to run for freedom.

There has to be a door somewhere, he noted, thinking it was only logical that hollows who couldn't travel there themselves had their own doorway. Besides, if Aizen was recruiting hollows, he would need someway for them to enter Hueco Mundo easily. Because from what Yumichika knew of basic hollows, they were very dumb.

Very, very- Yumichika ate sand a moment later. He rolled over in the sand just in time to see the dome of Las Noches soar through the sky. The whole palace blasted apart by a huge explosion. He rolled back over and covered his head and neck with his hands from the debris which had to fall from sky- at some point.

Nnoitra was expecting Szayel's complete mannerisms to change when Alair introduced himself, but they didn't.

Strange, the mantis noted, not sure what to say to this not-Szayel and yet still the same one. It was weird and Nnoitra couldn't make sense of it at the exact moment. "What did you want to tell me?"

"I had much to talk about once," Alair sighed heavily and frowned a bit. "But now I have forgotten most of it. Granted, I was said to talk too much from time to time. However, you are wondering about why this one, the hollow that is only a reflection of myself is reluctant to portray his ideal self. Szayel is really me- who I wanted to be, anyways. Enough with that, however. I am here to illustrate my past- as much I feel like sharing- no- as much as I remember. Hollow me is still using this form though. I am not powerful enough to use more than his mouth to express my feelings. Of which, I have noticed, you do not enjoy, N... I can't pronounce his name. I'm sorry. It's a odd double 'N' sound that I do not understand. Anyhow, I shall call you..."

Alair looked Nnoitra up and down for a moment before saying, "handsome."

The tall Espada grinned.

He was glad he was still attractive to Not-Szayel. Or Original Szayel.

That was a better name.

"So," Nnoitra began as there was a pause in speech, "it seems like you don't like the fact you like guys. Or at least that's the impression you two seem to give off. Now, people don't care as much as they used to, but I wanna understand why you two are so freaking paranoid about this thing."

"Paranoid doesn't even begin to describe how I felt," Alair said, wishing he hadn't been forced into this. "It's... hard to live when everyone hates you. They tell you, you are a sinner. That you are going to hell, because what you feel is 'wrong'. So... you drown yourself in drinks and hope everything will disappear. Szayel was sad because of what you did- going to fight. But...at least you have someone to fight. You are not fighting against the whole world and being forced to hide who you are everyday. What if people put you in jail for being too tall to fit through a door? But you can't change your height. Not without chopping off your legs. So... you hide your height and pretend to be just like everyone around you. Now, you are asking me- no, Szayel to suddenly stop pretending. But can you not see that is what we have been trying to do our whole lives? Yet, we fail to hide ourselves over and over. You may be able to kill the person who hurt you, but how do we kill the whole world?"

Alair fell silent and Nnoitra was as well.

He didn't mean to make Szayel cry.

That was the worst.

"I am sorry," Nnoitra thought he knew, but he didn't. Not at all.

Author's Note: This chapter is hot off the press, enjoy! Also, this chapter is completely written in 2018! (And yes, there is a New Year's joke in here. I had to.) From now on, the chapters that you get will be more recently written. We are almost near the end of this arc and then there is one more short one before the end of the story. YAY! Thanks so much for waiting so long, I hope you enjoyed!