As usual, Santana is the first to wake up. She smiles sadly as she looks to a sleeping Brittany and Becca. Today is the day. In 4 hours and 35 minutes, Brittany and Becca would be in a plane taking off to go back to Lima, Ohio.
Her smile fades at the thought. She sighs and quietly makes her way out of bed, being careful not to make too many sudden moves in order not to wake up her two loves.
Her eyes land on the luggage and two backpacks by the door, one that belongs to Brittany and one small one that belongs to Becca. She closes her eyes and tries to control her breathing. This is too much. She's only been awake for a few minutes, and already today is too much.
She walks into the bathroom and locks it, something she usually doesn't do, but she doesn't want Brittany or Becca to see her cry. This farewell is, after all, temporary. Still, it doesn't hurt any less. She turns on the shower and undresses. She lets the water run to get into the right temperature as she uses the restroom.
The water feels nice, but it does not offer any comfort to her. At this moment, it is just a cover for the emotions that she can no longer contain. She brings her hands to her face and begins to cry.
These four walls will be the only thing that gets to see her like this. She needs to hide her emotions for a little while longer, but right now, she can cry it out. The sound of the water can conceal her cries.
—
Brittany wakes up at the smell of Becca's morning breath in her face. She wrinkles her nose at the unpleasant smell and distances her face a few inches so she can no longer smell it. She can faintly hear Becca snoring, and it makes her smile. Becca is the perfect mix of her and Santana. She is absolutely beautiful. Brittany takes her hand and caresses her cheek before holding her head in place and leaning in to kiss her forehead. After whispering a quiet, "I love you," she gently sits on the bed with her legs touching the floor. She raises her arms as she stretches before getting out and walking to the coffeemaker where she pours water from some water bottles into the coffeemaker and lets it boil.
Brittany looks at the time and notes that it is 6:30 in the morning. Santana should be getting out of the shower soon. She is unsure of how long she's been awake, but she guesses it had been some time because her side of the bed was cold when she awoke.
Deciding to keep herself busy, she orders breakfast from the hotel. She then checks her phone and is happy to see a text from her sister stating that she got home last night.
Her attention turns to the bathroom door as it opens. She smiles when steam makes its way out of the bathroom. Santana comes out with a set of clean black short shorts and a white tank top. Her black bra is visible through the thin material. Santana exits the room while rubbing lotion on her face.
Brittany gravitates towards her, still all smiles. Santana sees her and smiles back. Instead of her smile growing, it falters. Brittany can see the puffiness of Santana's eyes and their redness. Brittany, now standing in front of her, takes her thumb and places it under her chin. She makes Santana look up to examine her eyes. Her suspicions were right, Santana had been crying.
"You were crying," she whispers.
Brittany watches as Santana closes her eyes momentarily before nodding.
Brittany's hands caress her face before she closes the distance between them and kisses her forehead before wrapping Santana in a tight embrace. Santana's arms wrap around her midsection, her cheek resting on her chest. She closes her eyes and breathes in Santana's scent before she places another kiss on the top of her head.
"I am scared, too."
—
Becca waits as her mother's check out of the hotel. Today, they will return to Lima. Her mother came to New York, she went to school, and now they will go back home.
She happily swings both of her hands. Each hand is holding one of her mothers' hands. She can't wait to get home to all her friends and her family. She has so much to tell them.
Mommy lets get of her hand and signs the little paper the nice lady gave her mommy.
"Mama, I need to go bathroom."
"Amorcito, I told you to go before we left the hotel." Her mother isn't too happy with her, but she isn't upset.
Becca smiles up at her mama, "I didn't need to go."
She waits as she tells her mommy that she will take her to the bathroom. Mommy nods.
"I will wait for you out in the lobby," her mommy says.
Becca takes her mama's hand as they walk to the bathroom. She knows exactly where to go but doesn't dare let go of her mother's hand. Once they arrive at the bathroom, her mama takes her to the first available stall.
Moments later, her mom helps her wash her hands. She giggles as she uses the hand dryer. Her mother waits for her at the door. She takes her hand, and they walk out.
"Amorcito, do you see your mommy?" her mama asks.
Becca looks around for a mommy and points and smiles when she spots her at the gift shop. She tugs and pulls her mama's arm towards the direction of the store. She tugs at her mommy's arm.
Her mommy kneels and is now at eye level.
"Hey Babygirl, guess what I just got you?"
Getting presents is always, always a good thing. Becca loves getting them.
"What, what, what?" she asks excitedly.
She watches as her mommy gets out a gray sweater that looks just like the one mama gave mommy.
"Now, you have one, too."
She smiles and hugs her mommy, who lifts her.
"We have got to go meet up with your tias." She hears her mama say as they make their way out of the store. They pass the lobby and the automatic doors, and onto the street.
—
Brittany and Santana sit next to each other. Becca is sitting in her lap. Quinn and Ashley sit across them. They're laughing and enjoying a good conversation. Time goes by too quickly, and soon, it is time for her and Becca to go through TSA security checkpoints so they can board their flight on time.
Her smile fades, and she sighs.
Santana looks at her. All she can do is nod. They both know it is time. They get up at the same time. Becca soon follows as do Quinn and Ashley.
"So, I guess this is it," Santana says.
"For now. You know I will call you as soon as we land."
She closes her eyes when Santana's hand comes to caress her cheek. Her arms wrap around her waist, pulling her closer.
"I will miss you right away," She whispers to her.
"Me, too."
They kiss. Faintly, Santana and Brittany can hear Quinn and Ashley taking Becca to see the planes as they gave them a moment.
"That one went really fast!" Brittany hears Becca say, making her pull away with a smile.
"You have a plane to catch," Santana says, wiping the few tears from Brittany's face with her thumbs.
Brittany returns the favor by wiping Santana's tears as well.
They both need to control their emotions for a little while longer so that Becca doesn't assume the worst.
"I love you," She tells Santana.
"I love you, too,"
They both turn to look at Becca, who is counting the planes she sees and walks over to her.
"All right, Becca, it's time to go." She says as she pulls the luggage with them.
Becca takes her hand and then grabs onto Santana's. They continue to walk as a group to the TSA checkpoint line. Once they get there, they all have their farewell. Brittany whispers to Quinn and Ashley for them to take care of Santana for her. She waits patiently as Santana hugs Becca and tells her she will miss her, but that they will talk every day.
"But why you need to call me, mama? You be with us in Lima." Becca asks in a confused tone.
—
Santana should have known better. She should have expected Becca not fully to understand what was happening. She looks at Brittany, who is just as perplexed as to her. There is no other way to make Becca understand. Santana grabs Becca's hand and kisses it.
"Amorcito, I am not going. I have to stay here for school. Remember? We talked about this."
Becca's frowns, and her lower lip quivers.
"You already did. You went every day. You said you would go to school and then go home."
Brittany kneels and places her arm behind Becca's back and moves it up and down in a soothing manner.
"Babygirl, you know your mother would come if she could. Going to college here is important for her. You will go home with me where your abuelos live."
"I wanna stay with mama," Becca says with tears falling from her eyes.
The look of sadness breaks her heart.
"I would do anything to have you stay, Amorcito, but we don't have much choice. I promise you I will visit. Your mommy got me a ticket already. Remember?"
"I wanna stay," Becca says again.
Santana hugs her and kisses her.
"You can't can't. Your mommy starts a new job, and I will be busy at school. I need you to understand."
Becca shakes her head. "No!" She exclaims, crossing her arms and looking away from her and Brittany.
Santana closes her eyes and swallows the lump in her throat. Becca has had tantrums, but this whole scenario is breaking her heart. She exhales loudly and blinks some tear away, not allowing them to fall.
"Rebecca," she starts, the use of Becca's name is foreign to her. She only uses it when she means business, "I love you so much, and I hate that I can't come with you, but I know you and mommy will have a great time. I promise to call every single day that we're not together. Please, please try to be a brave little girl about this."
Santana and Brittany wait several minutes. Becca has her back turned towards the whole time. Eventually, she turns around.
"No me gusta," Becca says while crying.
"I know, Amorcito, I know. I don't like it either. Will you be a brave girl for mama and mommy?"
Becca nods before she hugs them both at the same time. They all embrace for several moments before they all stand up. Santana lifts her into her arms, and they stand up. She hugs Becca as tight as she can before she hugs Brittany one last time. Santana kisses Brittany's lips tenderly and then kisses Becca's cheek one last time.
"I love you both so much, and I will miss you with all my heart."
"Me, too," Becca responds.
"I love you, too," Brittany says.
"I will call you," Brittany reminds her.
Santan can only nod. She hands Becca to Brittany. She watches with sad eyes as she clings onto Brittany. Her brown eyes follow Becca and Brittany as Brittany hugs Quinn and Ashley one last time before they walk away.
Santana stands still, looking at Becca crying as Brittany carries her and tries to calm her down. Her unshed tears make it blurry to see them. She smiles and blows her daughter a kiss, hoping to see her smile. It does. Becca blows her one back. Santana follows them with her eyes the whole time. Brittany turns around just before going into a pathway where there is no looking back. Becca repositions herself to back at her, too.
They both smile and wave when they turn and walk forward until they are entirely out of sight.
Santana breathes in slowly and blows it out as she exhales. She closes her eyes and lets her tears fall. Santana feels someone take her hand. She opens her eyes to see it was Quinn, who had taken her hand. She squeezes it for support. Ashley places her arm around her waist.
"We've got a date with your bed, a movie, and some ice cream," Ashley says.
"You down?" Quinn asks.
Santana wipes her tears with her hands before nodding in response.
Quinn and Ashley smile before they all walk towards the exit.
—-
Brittney walks down the aisle between the airplane seats, looking for her and Becca's seat. When she finds them, she places Becca onto her feet. Her daughter has stopped crying, but she still has a little stutter in her breathing from all her crying. She tells her to sit by the window, placing their backpacks into the compartment above their seats. Becca, who has been looking out the window, turns to look at her. Brittany smiles and sits in the middle seat.
"See anything interesting out there?"
Becca nods sadly, "Tiny people."
Brittany smiles and looks out the window to humor her. She buckles them both and reaches for her hand.
"Becca, we will take off soon. I know you've never been on a plane, but remember going on that roller coaster at the fair?"
Becca nods.
"It's a lot like that only faster, and it goes up a lot higher. If you get scared, squeeze my hand as hard as you can. When the plan gets high enough, We can watch Zootopia on the tablet, okay? Here, take this lollipop. It'll help with your ears popping." She said, handing her a lollipop.
"Blueberry. My favorite."
When the plane is taking off, she feels Becca reach for her hand. As the plane elevates higher and higher, she feels Becca squeeze her hand harder and harder.
"Mommy," Becca says in a shaky voice. "I is scared."
Brittany places her hand on her head and puts her lips on the top of her head, where she kisses her.
"It's okay, baby girl, it'll be over real soon. The rest of the ride will be less scary."
"Pinky pwomise?"
Brittany smiles and offers her pinky to Becca, who wraps her little pinky with hers.
"Pinky promise."
—
Santana, Quinn, and Ashley enter her dorm. A place she'd been to only a handful of times. She, Brittany, and Becca had visited it when they first arrived in New York, but she had never been there too long. Though the room is decorated, it didn't feel like hers. Her eyes land on a Becca's stuffed animal.
"Did she-" The tightness in her throat prevents her from talking any further.
"She wanted you to keep it so could hug it at night," Quinn tells her. "I don't think she realized she wouldn't get it back before they left."
She takes the stuffed duck into her hands and places it on her lap when she sits on her bed. Her lip quivers before new tears build up in her eyes. No matter how in control she was of her emotions, Santana loses it.
Quinn and Ashley sit next to her before they wrap her arms around her, comforting her.
—
Brittany expected to feel a sense of loss, but she never expected to feel so empty. She looks to Becca, who has fallen asleep a half-hour into the flight and runs her hands through her hair. Tears build up in her eyes, and she lets them fall. She silently cries at the change that is happening in her life. Santana will be stuck in New York, she will be in Lima, and apart from starting a new job, Becca was going to be far away from her mother.
She hasn't raised a child before. She is scared of so many things that could go wrong. Becca is going tobe her responsibility. She is thankful she'll have her parents to go to, and also the Lopezes, but she's still very nervous about this.
A few hours later, she wakes up to the sound of the pilot announcing they had arrived at the Columbus airport. She wipes her eyes, not remembering when she fell asleep. She lives its best to let everyone get off the plane first before she and Becca do. When most of the people are off, she shakes Becca awake and tells her they have arrived.
"Wake up, Babygirl," she whispers into her ear. "We're here."
She smiles when Becca turns her head away from her.
"Becca, we have to get down. Pop Peirce and Ma Whitney are waiting for us. We've got almost a 2-hour trip."
"Pop Pierce and Ma Whitney are here?" She says, turning back to her and opening her eyes.
"That's right, Babygirl. They've missed you so much."
"Can we call Mama?"
"Once we get into the car, I promise we will call her. Ready to get down?"
Brittany smiles when Becca nods.
—
Santana could not be more grateful for Quinn and Ashley. The three of them have been watching comedy movies and eating ice cream. Though she is laughing and having a good time, Becca and Brittany are in the back of her mind. She looks at the clock on her desk. Brittany and Becca should be landing soon if they haven't already. God, it has been only a few hours, and she misses them terribly.
She chuckles at the scene in front of her. Even then, she thinks of how much Brittney would be enjoyingthis ridiculous movie or how much Becca would be enjoying this ice cream.
As soon as she saw Brittany and Becca walk off, she felt like a piece of her was missing. A piece is missing. It has been ever since they left.
She bites her lip and tries not to think about it too much, but her phone rings. She smiles when she sees the photo ID: a picture of Becca, Brittany, and herself. Quinn and Ashley both must have seen who was calling.
"Ash and I are gonna get something to eat. I'll get you something."
Santana answers her phone and waves at Becca.
"Mama!"
"Becca, say hi to your tias," Santana tells her quickly as she jogs over to them.
"Hi!" They hear Becca say.
"Love you, Becca," Ashley and Quinn say in unison as they wave back happily.
—
Brittany chuckles as the girls tell Santana to have fun as they make their way out of the room. She places her hand over Becca's to hold the phone together. Brittany nears her head closer to Becca, so they are both in the frame. She winks at Santana who's smile gets bigger when she sees it. Her parents greet her by yelling out loud. She rolls her eyes but loves how Santana calls out to them. She takes the phone and passes it to them so they can wave.
"The lighting is perfect, Santana. Remember that when you two have phone s-"
"MOM! Becca is right here!" Brittany says in a panic before reaching for the phone, taking the phone away.
Becca and Santana are both laughing hysterically, and she can't help but smile. She listens as Becca and Santana talk. She takes a moment to take her in. The high-quality screen does not do her girlfriend justice. She is far more beautiful in person.
"Becca, you're such a brave big girl for getting on that plane. I am so proud of you."
"She did fantastically. She slept through the whole landing. Didn't you, Becca?"
Becca nodded, "Si, si./yes, yes."
This isn't perfect. She would much rather be in the same city as Santana instead of video chatting with her. But this, being able to talk to her, being able to be hers still, it makes her think she can handle the distance.
They will be okay. They will make it.