~Viola~

"The best love is the kind that awakens the soul; that makes us reach for more, that plants the fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds. That's what I hope to give you forever."

— The Notebook

Thursday could not have taken longer to drag along. Antonio found himself listening to the ticks of his watch in anticipation and desire for the hours and nights to pass by faster. Yet, time only seemed to turn on him rather than assist him. His stomach bubbled with a welcoming feeling that he gladly welcomed despite having a limited understanding of it.

In fact, Antonio didn't really understand many of the things that raced through his mind. He couldn't quite pin why he buried his face in his pillows and his blankets in hopes of catching the fleeting scent of chocolate and spice which he had grown fond of.

He did not know what led him to decide to shake things up and rather than focussing on the realism that he strived to achieve, to attempt abstraction and randoms tests of attempting to come up with an idea from sentences and descriptions he heard from the radio. Nor did he understand how the appeal of Luciano Pavarotti, Domenico Modugno, and Sergio Bruni had piqued him so suddenly.

Or rather, Antonio did not want to assume the obvious and chose to ignore it instead. He would have had to have been a fool to not realize that there was reasoning behind his habit of texting Lovino "good morning" when he arose in the morning or the way that he counted the hours while he was working, listening to the faint ticks of his watch, in hopes that time would speed and that Lovino would arrive ready to leave.

He knew what he was feeling; and if he didn't, then he had a good idea. He didn't attempt to hide it from Gilbert and Francis. Granted, Gilbert and Francis required little to know what was going on in Antonio's mind. Still, Antonio was content. While he knew that this was most likely nothing but a small crush that would light up and burn just as rapidly as it had started, he felt great joy in being able to experience something that he had never felt before.

The feeling of thinking about someone and wanting to embrace them weaved around him and the image of butterfly kisses branded on the side of his brain. He found it intriguing for he was attempting to decipher each little though. He felt like he was back in junior high or high school and finally able to understand the strange obsessions that his friends had over people over the years.

His obsession smelled like chocolate and spice.

When Thursday finally rolled around, Antonio's energy levels spiked through the roof and his head filled with thoughts about the day and the things that they would possibly do. Oh, the way that the world seemed all the warmer just because of one person.

Gilbert and Francis watched him with a curious eye as he paced the hall that morning—almost forgetting that they existed or knowing it and not quite sure of how to approach them about such a thing despite knowing well that his friends knew much more about flings and romance than he did.

Sapphire and ruby colored eyes carefully analyzed him. The way he ruffled his hair in slight frustration and how his eyes, that most expected to be faded and dull, filled with emotions such as the glitter of excitement and the storm of uncertainty. His soft laughter that only emphasized the fact that he was burning in confliction and anxiety. The thought of the possibility of another failure that would crush the joy that had been overflowing into his life.

As the hours passed and the time for Lovino arrived closer, Francis noted the way that Antonio anxiously opened up his phone every few moments to check if he had any notifications only to have the robotic voice of the phone tell him for what seemed like the forty-fifth time, that he, in fact, had no messages. When he did get a message, he would respond quickly. However, Lovino didn't seem to respond very quickly, so the messages came with great delays.

Finally, the message that Francis and Gilbert had been waiting for as they sat and did their work on his couch came.

'I'm on my way. I should be there in fifteen minutes. See you, dork.'

The way Antonio jumped, he looked ready to take action. Francis' lips curved into a grin as did Gilbert's. Francis pushed his reading glasses up and closed his laptop, "Antonio, my friend, you are quite attracted to the guy. Are you sure you will manage all alone?"

Antonio bit his lip, his head tilting down and hair falling gently on his face, "I hope so. I don't want to do anything stupid and possibly scare him off! He's a really cool friend who I admire and even if this is some dumb crush that goes away in a week or so, I'm really happy. I feel normal!"

Gilbert raised his brow and put down the book he was holding, a slight chuckle escaping past his lips, "Toni, you shouldn't worry about that. You're you and that's what makes you awesome! I can't imagine you being any different."

Antonio sighed and gave a light, forced laugh, "I know I know, pero—what if I could see? It makes me wonder. Would I be a better friend? Would I be a better painter? I don't-"

"Toni. You wouldn't be into painting if it hadn't happened and you know it. I know it sucks balls what happened, but you are an amazing guy who has done some crazy things to get where he is and I refuse to see you act depressed about something that made you into the rad artist you are now! Now get your shoes on and go out there and have fun you amazing art Vanhoe."

Antonio snorted a bit at the joke, choking on the air in the process. His laughter filled the room, a bubbly addition, "That's—that's a new way to describe me. Normally you call me a slut bucket." His laughter continued as he reached lazily to the side to grab his wallet which he did not feel in his pocket. Once he stuffed it in his pocket absentmindedly, he stood up, "But still. I'm allowed to wonder."

Gilbert clicked his tongue and gave his head a small sway to each side, "Yeah, but I don't want you bringing yourself down. You're too cool for that."

His smile flickered and he bit his lip. Hugging himself tightly, Antonio took deep breaths and attempted to relax his nerves that wildly raced about and churned his stomach cruelly. He was overthinking and drowning himself once again. He didn't want to do that; especially not today. Not when he was finally going to spend time with a friend and when he was understanding that he was capable of feeling and doing things everyone else did. This was a gift that he wanted to clutch between his fingers and lay in just to feel the silky pleasure that came with it. Never before had he felt something so strong and Antonio wanted to chase it to its farthest reaches in hopes of discovering a world that he might have been missing and a life that he could take on that was beyond the borders of the area he lived in.

As soon as he was calmed and less focused on the 'what if's that he had burdened his mind with, he took a deep breath, asked his friends to wish him luck, and walked out of his home to fresh smell of autumn that chilled him for a moment before he stepped down onto the leaf-covered path and walked to his gate to wait for Lovino.

He waited for a bit, fiddling with his white cane that was hooked to his belt loop for a bit before a sudden aroma caught him off guard. He had been expecting the sweet smell of chocolate and spice that kissed his senses lovingly, but teasingly. However, now he was getting a sudden hit of a more alluring fragrance that played with his mind. It was certainly a very appealing one as it captured his attention and he spent a few moments standing there attempting to decipher it and who could possibly wear something like that. The welcoming trail of citrus, Mediterranean herbs and spices danced when they reached him and hit him with a wave of nostalgia.

Of course, he had a fairly good guess of who wore such an entrancing and intoxicating perfume. He gave a toothy grin, his head falling to the side a bit, "That's a new smell. Did you get all prettied up for me?"

Lovino scoffed, attempting to play it off as some stupid comment despite the fact that he had indeed put a little extra effort in his appearance that he already took a lot of pride in even if Antonio couldn't see him, "Sure, dork. You're so special I spent three hours thinking 'I need to be pretty, hmmm' and then made myself look like a god."

Antonio chuckled and nudged Lovino playfully, "Ah, I always knew you adored me!"

Lovino didn't bother to attempt to argue with him, "Come on, let's get moving or I'm ditching you for some cannoli."

There was no argument after that. Antonio walked the rest of the way with Lovino, holding onto his arm loosely, but enough that it caused Lovino's breath to hitch for a moment. Such a gentle and gesture that he was thinking deeper than it was most likely meant to be taken.

Hooking his arm around Lovino, Antonio tugged him gently so that they could leave. His face was filled with light and excitement that he had never known. Yet, he welcomed it—for it eliminated the cold tugging that tormented him for years.

In fact, so excited about finally getting a chance at friendship and living life as a normal person, Antonio went on to talk to Lovino, asking him the silliest of questions such as his favorite color, his favorite smell, and what he would take with him if he were stranded on an island.

And as immature and childish as it may have seemed to anyone watching, to him it meant the world. All the years of maturing much too quickly and forcing himself to fit the image of perfection melted away and the years of missed adolescent opportunities and growing up flowed in. Yes, it turned his mind to a mess of maturity and immaturity, but it also brought him great joy.

The experiences he never had—and one person was walking him through it all even if his friends were far off and his emotions scattered.

"We have to get churros."

"Ugh, but the churros in these places are never good!"

"Churroist."

"Not even a word…"

"Well, now it is, you churroist."

"Oh my gosh, Antonio. Stop," Lovino groaned in irritation as he listened to Antonio, "I thought you were smart, turtle dork."

Antonio chuckled, shrugging as he pulled himself closer to Lovino just by the slightest to eliminate the distance in between them, "I am, but maybe you're just not seeing it,"

"Sure, and I am secretly Machiavelli," he retorted in a playful yet mocking tone.

Antonio took none of it to heart. He knew how his friend was and things like this remained just that—things.

Thus, he carried their conversation on. Hands holding Lovino's arm, smiles causing the dark world he had seen since he was a kid to light up with bright reds that carried his heart with them.

Lovino began to talk a bit more as well, barriers crumbling and in their place a warm embrace that caused him to act a little more like his normal self, "When we get there, we are going to play meaningless carnival games because I refuse to go to something like this and not waste money I don't have any way."

A small chuckle escaped Antonio and he shook his head, "You have such a negative sense of humor—I like that."

Sweet chuckles danced to Lovino's ears and Antonio grinned wider when he heard the silent name call under Lovino's breath. His heart beat faster and he practically leaped on the balls of his feet as he nudged his friend joyously and paid the fee to go and enjoy the festival.

Joy filled him so, leaving the entirety of the world behind and his negativities, for the briefest of moments, did not cover his eyes. Instead, it was just his eyelids.

Clearly, things were not perfect. He was still very much blind, he was still very much struggling, but it didn't matter. For once, he wasn't worried, but nor did he think that everything in the world would stop just because he found joy. No, but everything seemed less awful and the world was as it was. It was messy like he was, but it carried some light. Suddenly, all of those things that he had held against his eyes melted away. In the end, the only thing covering his eyes were his eyelids and nothing except for damaged parts became the reason for why he was blind.

The rest was as it was.

"Come on then. Let's go play some carnival games," he beamed, eyes twinkling with light behind a pair of dark sunglasses in a way that for the faintest of a second—Lovino almost forgot that Antonio was blind.

Tugging his friend along, he listened to the different cheery, loud tunes that became difficult to differentiate, but were still distinctly different. His cane tapped against the ground almost hesitantly despite his seemingly relaxed disposition. He blended in well with the popcorn spritzed air and the sounds of laughing people who turned for a few moments in surprise to see the blind man leading and not the one who needed to be led.

It wasn't like Antonio could see it though, so he still felt the twist and turns of an uncomfortable stomach. His mind still wandered and the anxiety still buzzed through him. The only difference between before and the moment now was the fact that the weight of it seemed to slide off just enough to allow him to breathe.

And when his hands slid up his sleeve and scratched at his arm, Lovino reached over and removed his hand, asking him about painting and telling him to just choose a carnival game. The first time, it had made Antonio slightly uncomfortable as he believed he was going to ruin the day. But after a while, he found himself grateful for it because it eased his nerves.

It was a difficult thing. Sight was a sense that was difficult to adapt without—at least it was for him. His life and his passions all depended on that one little sense. Even now, he had to walk to the festival rather than drive because he wasn't able to. The line separating him from being overemotional and just giving up and falling into a state of loss of emotion seemed so thin.

He was balancing them and slight hits like people saying or doing the wrong thing sent him spiraling straight into insanity. Yet, he was relaxed right now and he did not worry.

"So what game are we playing?"

Antonio grinned wide and squeezed Lovino's arm gently, "Ring toss."

"Ring toss?"

"Mhm," he nodded with confidence, "We'll play together. You will be my eyes and I will be the arms. Tell me where and I will toss."

Admittedly, the idea was the most idiotic thing that Antonio could have thought of. He could hardly manage to hit the target at all when he was throwing darts, so ring toss was quite the interesting choice. But this was Antonio; his ego was much to big to not try out the game and impress Lovino.

"If you say so. You have cash? All I brought was a card," he shrugged in curiosity of the results.

"Yeah, yeah. Just give me a second. How much is it?"

"Five for twenty rings."

Antonio nodded and reached into his pocket. Pulling out his wallet, he gave the money to Lovino to hand to the ring toss man as soon as they were next in line. The rings were placed firmly in his hands and he gripped his hand onto them tightly, dependently.

Stepping where he needed to be, he took a deep breath. Suddenly, the popcorn didn't smell as strong and the music wasn't as sweet. His mind collapsed for a moment and when he was back to Earth, Lovino was asking him if he was okay and he could feel the stares burning into the back of his head.

"Where do I throw, my eyes?" His voice was rather playful—joking even though he bore a stoic expression on his face.

It became clear to him that Lovino probably didn't know what to do and if he did know what to do, he didn't know how to describe it for Antonio. The silence told him everything and it was okay. This was all very new and probably a large hit to the face for Lovino to adjust to the way Antonio's life went.

"Throw at a forty-five-degree angle upwards about two inches to the left," his voice finally broke through the deadly silence.

Antonio did as he was told and moved his arm roughly two inches and thought about how to get the angle correctly. With a simple nod, he tossed the ring. It missed, but not by much. In fact, it nearly hooked on.

"Try again, but flick your wrist just a little more."

Antonio did as he was told, his heart beating fast in anxiety. The ring hooked on and Lovino let out what sounded like a sound of shock. It really was just a loud squeak mixed with a croak.

"Huh. Nice one! Alright. Next one is just five degrees above that one but about seven inches to the right," Lovino said as his face filled with concentration and he leaned close to Antonio absentmindedly.

Antonio nodded, smiling a bit more when he caught a whiff of Lovino's cologne. He knew that Lovino was closer to him and it sent a rush of blood to his face. He threw the next ring, a rush of pride filling him when Lovino cheered. His soul flew and his heart attempted to break through the barriers of his body out to embrace the person cheering.

The way his voice melted sweetly. Antonio could practically see Lovino and it made every piece of joy he struggled to express well enough overflow past the gates of his mind and into the crisp autumn air.

"Alright, turtle dork, next one," Lovino placed the ring in his hands and if the way his fingertips brushed against his palm wasn't enough to make Antonio's mind shut down, Lovino's hand wrapped around his arm. Delicate fingers that clung and pressed gently into a muscular arm and the touch shut Antonio down completely.

His mind cried out, begging him to pull away from the friendship and to end the misery he would surely place himself into. Oh, how the deepest and most frightened parts of him attempted to pull his emotions back in terror of the outcome. Yet, it was much too late and Antonio had already taken the leap into the mess his friend had warned him of years before.

"Move two inches downward and toss!"

Antonio did so, met with another cheer that send a welcoming feeling in his stomach. After the last one was tossed, Lovino removed his hand but the burning feeling of where his hand had been remained and it whispered sweetly to Antonio. Curving up and gently kissing his heart, it left him stunned for the briefest of moments before vanishing into the air with no trace but the slight tingling of where he had been.

"We have a winnnerrr!" the game operator grinned and looked at Lovino as if to say 'you pick since he can't see'. Antonio was still much too absorbed in the tingling feeling to notice the brief break in voices.

"The turtle please."

"Purple, blue, green, or red?"

This was where Antonio stepped in, finally hearing the conversation going on and recognizing that Lovino froze in his spot. It wasn't a first, nor would it be a last, "Red. It's my favorite color."

It took a moment of shuffling, but the large stuffed turtle was eventually pushed into his arms. Antonio embraced it close, a smile on his face as he walked off with Lovino in attempts to ignore the fact that he could sense the confusion from a blind man having a favorite color. His arms tingled and he grew tempted to sneak one hand up to scratch lightly. After all, it wasn't a big deal. It was only his arms and it would only be a little. However, the moment his hand grazed his sweater—another one gently pushed it away from his sleeve.

His focus was drawn away by the action and he smiled faintly, his anxiety melting down. Though his hand did trail back to his sleeve and rubbed lightly along the fabric out of bad habit. Often times, Antonio question his capability to manage life on his own. It always seemed like someone was pulling his hands away or sitting with him in attempts to relax his mind.

He walked with Lovino, the large toy was stuffed under his shoulder, threatening to fall down. Lovino swayed and hummed softly as they walked. It was one of those moments where the silence was rather welcoming despite not existing at all. It soothed him, allowing him to focus on the slight increase in his heart rate and the clammy hand that held the turtle while the other twitched with every tap his white cane made to the ground.

Each passing moment filled him with joy and the thought of his itchy arm soon disappeared. He wasn't tugging at the sleeves of his jacket in weak attempts to cover the scratch marks and nail indents. He was enjoying himself more than he had in a long time. Games were played, music listened to, and Antonio kept his stuffed turtle close in joy.

"I love red because my soul is red."

"I don't speak pretentious artist. And—you, um. Well-"

Antonio's laugh bubbled softly in the air, though a pang of nervousness killed it slowly before it faded into the music and sweet carnival aroma, "I wasn't always blind, you know. A lot of people think that, but I could see color too once. Red has always been my favorite. It's passionate and loving! It is also strong and determined! Red is everything I want to be."

"Nerd," Lovino teased in an airy voice, "I'd say yellow for you. But then again, you're not all yellow. Maybe orange? I dunno. You're a weirdo like that."

A smile cracked the surface of his face and he walked side by side with this amazing, Italian, culinary student. Somehow he knew it already, but a part of him rejected the thought of it. But without a doubt, there was something about the time he had taken to in spending with Lovino that left him with a tingly bubbling in his stomach and a sweet song in his mind.

"Orange? That's a new one. I've never been described that way before."

He chuckled and kept walking with him, his hand grazing Lovino's for a fleeting second. Somehow it felt like an eternity.

"Well now you have," he suddenly came to a stop, "Wow, Toni! Feel these," his voice filled with excitement and he tugged the man over to a nearby booth. It was surprising. He never heard him sound so—so joyous. He wanted to hear it more. He liked the way he sounded in that moment; joyous, excited, and free. The tone was striking in an endearing way. It was new and it sent a million flames into his heart. They did not burn him though. Rather, they embraced him. Tilting his head in his general direction, he felt a rougher tug that pulled him farther.

He was rather confused and not sure to what Lovino was referring to. He was going to point it out when something was placed in his hands. He furrowed his brows, running his fingers along it and it caught his attention. It was a wood carving—and from what he could tell, it was a detailed one.

"It's gorgeous," his voice filled with wonder and he ran his fingers over it longer. He could count the number of times he was truly able to admire art on one hand. This was a gift from heaven to him.

"Hell yeah, it is," Lovino commented, amazed by the detail.

Both stood there enchanted by something that they were both able to enjoy in equal but different ways. Lovino's eyes amazed by the tones that were used. Wine colors. They made the image in the wood so beautiful. That was what he cared about; those gorgeous wine colors sank into his mind. They contrasted with the bright bold rouges and greens and dark blacks and browns of the other pieces.

Antonio, on the other hand, admired the curves and detail that went into the carving. Sharp and simple cuts and they worked so well together that he could almost see the image in his mind. It was gorgeous. The patterns all around suggested that it was Eastern European.

"How much?"

Impulsive? Perhaps. But he didn't care much at all. He was rather overjoyed and despite the price costing him as much as a typical dinner out, he bought two. One for Lovino and one for himself. He had a small message carved in the back of Lovino's. Tucking the wooden pieces away, he continued to walk with him. He'd give him the carving at the end of the night.

"And why did you buy two? You're broke, dork," Lovino commented, emphasizing the silly name.

Antonio smiled and kept walking with him, listening to the music, "Because they are beautiful!"

Much like Lovino appeared in Antonio's world.

Lovino shook his head, confused. With a slightly amused scoff, he continued to walk with him, "We're college students. We're so poor that McDonald's is a delicacy."

"I know," his voice was airy, "But I was always a sucker for lovely things."

Lovino shrugged, "Alright. Whatever you want, dork. I'm not the dummy here."

That was something that seemed to send shivers down his spine amusingly enough. There was just something so fascinating about a person who appeared to be the farthest thing from pure using such chaste words. It was taunting to him—alluring even. Lovino, despite cursing plenty, seemed to use these words more and even other dumb insults a child would make up like 'butt muffin' which were strange, but amusing.

There wasn't much that either really wanted to do. It didn't take long for their stomachs to fill with funnel cakes, cannoli, coconut water, and anything and everything that could be found. They had played some games and listened to music. Overall, it was satisfying and a wonderful way to end the day.

But neither wanted it to end. Lovino kept holding onto Antonio's arm despite knowing well that he did not need to. Antonio let him even if it made his entire body numb to depend on somebody else as much as he was currently.

Antonio wanted to stay where he was and forget everything that he had ever known in life. He wanted to sit on the small bench and talk about everything. He wanted the fall air to freeze them until he couldn't move his fingers and Lovino was shivering just so that they could walk to his house, cheesy jokes being told, and warm up on the couch while old music played. He wanted so many things and he hated it because it slowly caused him to realize what was going on and it terrified him.

He didn't feel right about it. Indeed, he adored Lovino and wanted to be around him, but he was so afraid. He couldn't do it. Hell, as far as he knew, Lovino was straight. Antonio panicked because this wasn't how he wanted to figure out who he was attracted to. Why couldn't it have occurred in high school when he was a bit more confident? Why couldn't he be attracted to girls so that this would go by simpler? So many tormenting thoughts began to abuse his mind all at once and he was cowering from his demons.

His posture stiffened and suddenly the once gentle touch that kisses the deepest parts of his mind burned him like acid.

"Hey, you okay there, nerd," Lovino's soft voice cut through the tormenting voices.

He sighed and relaxed, the soft music in the background finally coming to his attention and drawing him away from terror and anxiety, "Y-yeah. I just-just needed a moment to collect myself. Thinking about things, I guess."

His arm became bare once more as Lovino sat up. He let out a soft sigh that tickled Antonio's heart. His cologne slowly wrapped around Antonio as well, rendering him a weak man, "If you say so. But I call bull."

His tone was very tantalizing. It floated delicately to his ears and soaked into his skin. He smiled gently at him because of it.

The music still played softly. It was late by now for sure. The nippy air grew dryer and more Siberian as the minutes passed. The heavy footsteps calmed signaling that people were leaving to go home and rest with their loved ones. But for Antonio, it meant a wonderful and perfect day coming to an end and he didn't want it to vanish. Not yet.

"There's a tent around here where people dance, would you like to go there before we leave?"

Fingertips wrapped around a sturdy arm like a gossamery feather floating down gently in the winter air to kiss the snowy surface of the ground.

Gentle steps to the tent attempted to distract a fast-beating heart. He was soaring too high. He was reaching for the sun. How could he expect anything but pain from what he was pursuing? It was inevitable—it had to be.

But when the soft and adoring music from the tent reached his ears, he could have sworn he felt Lovino's hand warm up as it held his arm.

He recognized the song and suddenly all of his fears melted away. It rang softly and his entire body heated up in terror but also desire.

"Would you like to dance with me?"

No, Antonio stop

"Sure."

Antonio stop. This will only lead to pain.

His hand gently took one of Lovino's hands, the other landing on his hip. Sweet music played and an eternity could have passed and they would not have noticed. Hazel eyes flickered up to meet green eyes that would never know the look he bore on his face nor the way his olive skin tinted red at their slow movements.

The world could have withered around them and their dance would not have ended. It couldn't. It was impossible. Gentle turns and a white cane scattered to the side somewhere with a bag. Both of them forgot to care.

He was soaring. He didn't care if he hit the sun. He welcomed it. Let his wax wings melt—oh, he did not care. All of his concerns lay with the one in his arms and the way that he fit so beautifully in his arms as if God had intended for this very moment.

Bésame, como si el mundo se acabara después

Kiss me—as if the world would end after.

Temptation.

He couldn't, he refused to.

But then the sweet warmth of him filled him and Antonio forgot all of his senses. He was flying and free unlike he had ever been before. It frightened him and did fill him with concern, but it was much too good of a feeling to neglect. He would embrace it.

His mind cried out in vain attempts to get him to reconsider, but he had already taken the leap. After years of standing and waiting for joy to hit him, he found behind the barriers he had set up for himself. And he was a mess, oh he was a mess. He was a binge drinker and he was a fool, but he loved him so much. He loved so much it was ridiculous.

He hardly knew him. It still hadn't been long enough to really love him, but he did. He loved the way that his laughter stuck to him and replayed as he drifted into a slumber. He loved that laugh that wasn't perfect—in fact, it was loud and anything but lovely. He loved hearing it because it meant he was happy and it meant that he had made him laugh. And he didn't care about his flaws because they were beautiful.

People had flaws. It didn't make them any less beautiful.

Antonio spun him, sending him out and then back in. His arms wrapped around that beautiful Italian in bold grip, but gentle touch. His eyes met Lovino's and saw nothing but everything. He could see his face and the way it warmed up as he held him. He saw the shy smile that he attempted to hide believing he looked weird with it on. He saw his gently curling hair that framed his face and brushed gingerly over his nose and those wonderful freckles that he painted into the deepest parts of his mind night after night.

He could see their slow steps as they swayed to sweet music, but most of all—he saw himself. Messy, crinkled, T-shirt and pants that hugged him in all of the right places.

He felt free. A joy that he had never known. Something that he could only ever dream of; something that he had only ever dreamt of. It was so perfect and pure.

As the music continued, the climax arriving and the music speed and volume rising, Antonio fell deeper in love.

Besame sin razón, por que quiere el corazón.

He leaned in, his mind screaming and slamming against the walls of his skull. 'No' it demanded. 'Don't do it!' it cried. But he ignored it.

Lips grazed lips just barely and then pressed against each other, fear melting away. One mouth opened, locking perfectly with another. Suddenly, they were soaring.

Fire against the wind; they danced in harmony. Antonio kissed those lips which he could have only ever dreamt of coming anywhere near each evening as he attempted pathetically to convince himself otherwise.

An imprint was left in his mind. When his lips broke free, a warm gaze met him. Half-lidded hazel eyes filled with joy.

"I love you," he murmured, the words slipping past his lips like honey. He wanted him to know.

"Shut up and kiss me again," he was pulled down to meet those sugary sweet lips once again.

There was a small chuckle in between, but no argument. Antonio cupped either side of that face he held and painted. Swaying gently to the music, both forgot their pains and their pasts for just one moment. They were just making that moment last.

That's how they stayed; swaying carelessly to the music, arms around the other, forgetting everything they ever knew and all that had ever hurt them. A fire burning inside them both warmed their hearts and sparked their love.

If it were not for the fact that were being kicked out since it was already very late, chances are they would have stayed like that.

The walk home was just as sweet though. Lovino would glance up and look away with the shyest of smiles despite knowing he did not need to. Small jokes and Antonio laughing as he held his stuffed red turtle close to him. Nervous tucks of hair behind ears and the warmth of two people who were taking slow steps together. Light laughter and hesitant reaches for the other's hand.

And when they arrived at Antonio's house, there were the hesitant and clammy hand movements as he asked if Lovino would like to stay the night. There was a pause, hesitance. Uncertainty and conflict before a quiet 'yes' came out and two hands intertwined.

There was a sweet laugh as music was turned on and Antonio spun Lovino in his arms. Gentle kisses peppered to his skin and arms loosely wrapped around a neck, pulling up and another pair pulling in by the waist. Both stood there, content in everything that was. Laughter filled the room, both forgetting that two people were still in the house.

That's how they were found too; they were just hugging each other close as if afraid to let go. Blue and red watched them, a smile on each. Blue eyes filled with joy and red eyes with concern, but both disappeared leaving the two to enjoy their night and have all of the joy that they deserved.

Both ended up on the couch with a large blanket over them. And as Lovino fell asleep, Antonio felt a smile come to his face and joyous tears brim his eyes. He cried silently, covering his mouth as hot tears flooded down his cheeks.

He was loved.

He was actually loved and it amazed him. He was crying, not sure how to react. He was loved dearly by someone and he never wanted to let him go. And yes, he was so scared. He was so very scared, but at the moment, he was happier than any man could possibly be. Antonio cried, pushing his hair back as a smile broke on his lips and he sighed happily. If this was what love felt like, then he wanted it more than anything else.

When he fell asleep, his hand was still intertwined with Lovino's. A figure watched the couple for a moment from where he was on the stairs.

'Tell me Antonio, will you ever allow yourself to fall in love?'

"Yes Francis, if it is with Lovino—a million times yes."