His entire body hurt and the screams pierced his ears like knives. But it felt so good. The pain. The panic. The boiling rage. The song that hummed along in his ears like a high-pitched ring. For once, he didn't need to think. He didn't need to be better. He didn't need to make anything better. He didn't need to be needed. He could just be himself.
It felt so good to feel. To let it all go. To lose control.
He didn't need to bottle it all away. Hiding was a thing of the past. This was who he was now. He didn't care anymore.
At least, that's what he wanted to believe.
The screams beneath him as people scattered pulled at his heartstrings. He didn't know their faces, he didn't know their voices; he didn't know anything about them other than he wanted to care about them. He didn't want them hurt. He didn't want them to be afraid.
And yet...he did.
No, he didn't.
Yes. Yes, he did.
He shook his head as if trying to clear his head from the voice that told him to stand down; to stop that annoying little pang of guilt that kept him from crushing the town beneath his feet. He was so tired of being the one to stop threats. Of being the one that took the punches and the blame.
Of being torn between the person everyone expected him to be and not knowing who he was supposed to be.
The song in his head grew louder as if agreeing with him. It drowned out the voice that held him back and urged him to continue forward. It acted like it knew him. Like it could show him his true self. He was a monster, like his mother before him, who hid under the guise of helping others. And now, he had no mask. No purpose. No one to help.
No reason to repress that side of him.
But the chains of guilt wrapped around his mind again as a voice rang through his head. The voice of the gem he had nearly crushed under his hand. Though she was long gone, he could still hear her. Her words meant nothing to him at the time. But her tone was soft. Scared. Like she knew him. Like he knew her.
The first coherent thought he had hit him like a truck and caused him to freeze where he stood, his eyes fixated on the ground, but unseeing. He nearly killed her.
An ache unlike anything he experienced exploded in his chest, but before he could put a name to it, the ringing in his ears lessened. It morphed into a lullaby and its cold words cooled the burning in his chest. He breathed in sync with it and he felt the ache lessen as all thoughts were brushed away from his mind.
That aching part of him was so tired. He felt it struggle, but it was weak. It knew it couldn't win. He wouldn't be bottle away any longer. He growled lowly to match the tune of the song and felt that annoying part of him succumb.
The moment the chain snapped, he stopped caring about the ones on the ground. They were ants to him. They meant nothing to him. Just as he meant nothing to them.
The monster was free.
… … … … … … … … … …
Garnet left Sadie, Shep, and Kiki to head to the warp pad that was nestled safely in the temple. Pearl was already there and pushing away what debris Amethyst left on it. Pearl had reformed and met the purple gemstone just after she sent Lion off to get Connie.
Pearl nodded to Garnet, her face distraught, but determined.
"The Diamonds should be here any second now," she said before she faced the warp again. "I just hope they help."
Right on cue, the warp burst to life and one after the other, the Diamonds appeared.
"Honestly," White said as she stepped off the warp and glared down at Amethyst. "I don't see why Steven wouldn't just visit us himself instead of sending a messenger."
"Because," Amethyst said, clearly tired of explaining herself. "Steven needs help!"
White tutted, but Garnet was the one who spoke next.
"He's corrupted."
Silence rang out at these two words. White covered her mouth in shock and Blue and Yellow exchanged worried glances.
"He's...what?" Yellow said, her arms crossed. "That's impossible. We didn't attack the planet!"
Garnet shook her head. "It's possible," she told the group. "He did it to himself."
"How?" Pearl asked, but Garnet didn't have an answer.
"So you need us to heal him?" White guessed, her hand falling from her mouth.
"And help us fight him," Garnet said with a nod. "He's still half-human, so we can't poof him."
"But we can subdue him," Pearl added in, her voice shaky. "I just wish we didn't have to."
"We all do," Garnet said. "But we have to be strong right now. For him."
"And we have to protect the humans," Pearl said. "We need to draw him away from the city as much as we can."
The Diamonds nodded and they all stepped around the mountain and gasped in unison.
"Oh, stars," Blue exclaimed. "That's him?"
"Well, he certainly embodied Pink's destructive habits," Yellow said. "Come on, Blue, White, it's been ages since we've had a good fight."
"Don't hurt him!" Garnet yelled. "He's still half-human!"
"Don't worry, we can handle this," White said confidently. "One emotional change from Blue, one hit from me to stop him and then Yellow can destabilize his powers. It will be fine."
They walked off without glancing back at the Crystal Gems, who exchanged unsure glances.
"Youuu whoooo, Steven," White called with a wave. "Throwing a tantrum are we?"
The beast turned, his silhouette nearly concealed by the rising embers and thick smoke as Beach City continued to burn. Garnet knew the Little Homeworld gems weren't too far behind - Lapis and Freckles could handle the fire once they go there.
"You know, your mother used to do the same thing," White continued. "It was never this extreme, but I guess you inherited her dramatic flair."
"White, don't goad him," Blue told her. "He's suffering enough."
White rolled her eyes, but she nodded. "Steven, just come here and let us help you."
The beast took a step closer and the wind picked up. His form was completely hidden now. The Diamonds braced themselves and, as they predicted, Steven pounced. He hit White and toppled her over, but Blue and Yellow were ready.
The city turned a deep shade of blue and the remaining gems all fell to their knees as tears pooled in their eyes. Steven, still on top of White, shook his head and pawed at his eyes before he turned slowly to glare at Blue.
Without warning, his eyes glowed pink and Blue was thrown back by an unseen force. She slammed into the ground and the blue aura faded.
"He still has his powers?!" Pearl exclaimed wildly as they watched the fight unfold.
White used the distraction to ready herself. Her gem glowed and Steven glanced down to it immediately. He leaped away from her and narrowly dodged her attack. He raised his haunches and roared at her, his displeasure at her antics clear.
"Why you little," White growled at the clear insult. "I'm only trying to help!"
Yellow pulled Blue to her feet as Steven dodged another one of White's attacks. Blue tried again. Tears stopped in the corner of Steven's eyes as he growled lowly. His body tensed and his gem emitted a soft glow.
Yellow raised her hand and hit Steven in the back with her powers. The Diamonds watched as it spread through his body, but it did little more than cause the beast to shudder uncomfortably. He turned to face Yellow.
Then White tried again. The bright glow of her eyes gave away her power, but Steven was too hindered by Yellow and Blue to dodge out of the way.
His eyes flashed again and a pink barrier erupted around him. The diamond panels were cracked and fazed in and out of existence as the shield seemed to glitch around him. Yellow and White's attack were both absorbed in the panels they hit for a moment before they burst back out at them. Both were stained pink.
Yellow jumped out of the way and crashed to the ground; her attack slammed into the mountainside and chunks of rock rained down on them.
White was hit squarely in the chest. She was lifted off the ground by the impact and forced onto the beach. She laid there, unmoving.
"White!" Blue called, but the diamond did not stir. They all watched as a pale shade of pink spread over her form. But nothing more happened. She just laid there, frozen.
"What did you do to her?" Yellow demanded as Steven dropped the wall and faced her. "Fix her!"
Steven's eyes flashed again and Yellow was forced back into the crater her powers made. Her back hit the mountain, hard, and she collapsed to her knees.
Blue let out a wild scream and formed a ball of power in her hand before she slammed it against Steven's chest. He stumbled back one step but slammed the side of his head into Blue's. She toppled over but tried again. She waved her arm and light missiles soon rained down upon Steven. He took the impact, barely flinching as they bombarded his skin.
Instead of going down, he slowly stood on his hind legs. At full height, he was taller than Blue.
Yellow got up and brushed boulders off her shoulder. She glanced at the Crystal Gems and pointed to Steven.
"You're welcome to help," she snapped at them before she walked back over to the fight.
The gems looked to each other and took a step forward when Yellow launched herself at Steven and grabbed him in a submissive hold from behind. Steven roared in annoyance, but his tail wrapped around Yellow's knee and pulled forward. The diamond's balance broke and she stumbled forward.
With her arms still around Steven, he whipped around and sent her flying once more. She fell next to Blue, barely landing on her feet.
Behind Steven, Alexandrite rushed forward. She summoned Sardonyx's hammer and slammed it on Steven's tail and held him in the submissive hold once more. Four of her six arms wrapped around Steven's chest and stomach and pinned his arms, while the other two held down his tail with the hammer. Her feet dug into the ground.
Blue wasted no time and sent a direct blast to Steven's now exposed gemstone as Yellow let loose her powers. Alexandrite felt the beast shudder and tremble as Yellow tried to destabilize him and Blue tried to control his emotions. She felt hot tears land on her arms and she barely heard the monster whimper.
Her chest suddenly exploded in pain as she remembered who she was fighting.
"It's okay, Steven," she said to the boy, doing all she could to keep herself together.
The beast growled at her words and, as if he sensed her weakness, made his move. Alexandrite was forced back by a large diamond-shaped pink barrier. Her hammer scraped painfully against Steven's tail and the spikes on it as she was pushed back. As she pushed against the pink barrier and was forced back in the sand, the fusion became aware of the rock particles sticking to her foot.
She glanced down and saw a red streak leading from her heel to Steven's tail.
The beast looked at her, pain and anger in his eyes. Three of the spikes on his tail were splintered and broken. One was pulled out entirely; it laid next to a gaping wound.
"I didn't mean to," Alexandrite whispered before the fusion was undone. Pearl was openly upset, her eyes misting over as she stared at the blood. Garnet and Amethyst looked away from it, but both still summoned their weapons.
"We can't stop," Garnet told her. "We'll heal him once he goes down."
"But," Pearl started.
"Garnet's right, Pearl," Amethyst cut her off. "I don't like hurting him either, but we have to. We have to stop him."
Steven's eyes flashed as the song allowed some of those words to reach the inner depths of Steven's mind. They had to hurt him. They had to stop him.
They wanted to.
Just like he wanted them to.
Steven roared loudly and the gems clapped their hands over their ears. His yell this time sounded different. Not a trace of human emotion could be detected. It was purely feral.
He fell to his four legs and turned to face White, who stirred as soon as Steven's eyes fell on her. The gem monarch stood, her face blank and eyes unfocused.
"Move!" Garnet yelled.
White launched herself forward and slammed into Blue, who fell over into Yellow.
"White, what are you doing?!" Yellow angrily asked her. "Get him, not us!"
But the monumental gem wasn't listening. She grabbed Blue's hair and threw her aside to separate the other two diamonds. Her eyes glowed a faint pink and Yellow barely moved out of the way in time to dodge the mind-controlling blast.
"What's happening?" Blue asked.
"It's Steven," Garnet curtly answered. "He's controlling her."
Blue shook her head, not even bothering to ask how. She saw White's own power reflect off Steven's barrier.
"Fuse again," Blue told the gems. "We need to end this." She rushed back to fray and pulled White off Yellow without another word.
… … … … … … … … … … … …
Author's note: Next chapter: Connie shows up! We're about at the halfway point of the story, I think. Let me know what you would like to see!