"PLEASE LET ME TOUCH YOUR ARM!" Eyes glinting and pupils large they threw themselves at the skinless steaming arm only to soon howl in pain as we all heard a sizzling sound. Hanji threw themselves on the grass and rolled around getting even dirtier than they already were. "HOOOOOT! WRITE THAT DOWN MOBLIT! TITAN WITHOUT SKIN IS VERY HOOOOT!"

Hanji rolled over and grinned at me from the grassy floor. Their shirt had grass stains on it and a small beetle was in their hair along with a ladybug with four spots that was climbing their goggles. Oh, I was sooo going to clean their filthy ass tonight if I so have to use my own damn soap!

Eren, the demigod of Death and Destruction, bringer of Order

Thank you Sailor Dragonball 87 for your review, it made me realize that some things might need to be hinted at and/or explained more now and later on in the fanfic. And since I can´t remember if I have put a disclaimer on AoT and the Marvel characters I do it now since I am too lazy to see if I have. I have also read (most of) the manga and it does not seem like Hange has any defined gender which is cool since they are one of the only characters I know that are like that. I realize I wrote Jacked-off in chapter 4, instead of Jerked-off, hope none of you got confused.

I am having suspicions that I have writing problems. When my teacher once had the monthly talk with me as he does with everyone he commented that the red squiggly lines mean that a word is wrong. He did not know that I had known that and used all the help I could get. It just seems hard to spell some words and to read out loud so I dunno.

Please Review and follow/favorite the story, It really makes me happy.

Eren/Even POV:

Levi was carrying a million tons of clothes in a couple of baskets. I was behind him carrying only half of what he was panting slightly as I had to balance it all as we walked up a couple of stairs. Captain Levi had his signature scowl on. It was impressive how he could look so hot while having a bitchy face. Wonder if he would look as scary if he had chubby cheeks like a child. He would look cute, then again, he already is, but don't tell him that!

My captain kicked open a wooden door, using his hip and plump butt to hold it open for a split second, so I could get into the room. The room itself was cold and had a bunch of tubs at least one and a half meter tall or more. The walls were lined with the tubs and the middle of the room was dedicated to a large table that had baskets underneath filled with soap, bleach and fabric softener. None of the soaps or fabric softeners had any scents, as it would be stupid to have. A dozen of soldiers having clothes smelling like flowers would make any sensitive nose within a mile sneeze. It would be a deathtrap. I knew that Captain Levi had a sensitive nose, why else make sure that there was no dust around, even if it was otherwise clean? Why glare at the flowers spreading their pollen?

Grisha Jaeger, one of my fathers was a doctor. He had taught me some stuff, one about allergies and how they work. Levi was showing signs of pollen allergy as well as dust allergy. Subtly rubbing his (red) eyes outside when it was hot and pollen season, rubbing his eyes when cleaning away dust. The strange thing is that he does not seem to even notice or think anything is wrong. I should ask him why. It seemed fairly obvious to me.

Captain Levi climbed onto a stool, it seemed like it was made for Heichou alone since it fit him perfectly. I seriously doubt that any other soldier cared enough about cleaning to get their own stool to be able to perfectly reach the tubs. The funny thing was that he still had to stretch to be able to reach. (A/n: I made him 152 cm just to make his height even more of a joke)

I put my basket of clothes and started to sort them. Captain Levi had done it before he began carrying them but of course, I always procrastinate. Putting the sorted clothes on the table I began making sure that Petra´s and Hanji´s bras were separated and closed so that they would not get ruined in the wash. I was seriously surprised that Mayor Hanji even had bra´s but then again, they looked like they were older than me and dirtier than a dung beetle living in a stable. I have a feeling Captain Levi gave me their pile just so he wouldn't have to be near them more than he had to.

Carrying Petra's pile of clothing to one of the tubs I made sure that everything that was white was in there before turning to the table to get some bleach. Putting the bleach next to the tub I turned to the water pump above the tub and began to pump. Soon enough near-boiling water came running out of the tap, covering Petra´s clothes. I got some bleach and carefully poured it into a small cup to measure it before adding it. Grabbing a wooden pole, I began to stir the clothes like it was soup, I didn´t want there to be large blotches on the clothes where it was whiter than other areas. Going back to the table with the bleach I passed it over to Heichou who had been studying me.

My captain took the bottle before going over to his tubs doing the same thing I did just a lot faster and more detailed in measurement. He was a cleaning GOD. He looked like some sort of strange deity with his sanitary headscarf and bandana, it actually fit him, unlike me. I looked like a strange potato in it.

I got some liquid soap and started pouring some of it into the tub using the measuring cup that was hung up on the wall next to said tub on a hook. Petra's clothes were soon clean, and I pulled out the cork on the bottom of the tub watching slowly as the water was seeping away. Putting the clothes in a hamper I carried it over to the other side of the room dedicated to washing away soap and stuff like that. Captain Levi was already there with his own, Eld´s, Gunther's, Auruo´s and Erwin's clothes.

Levi spoke to me without looking up from his clothes rinsing "You should probably start with Hanji´s now. Then you can rinse it all at the same time in different tubs and get it done faster." He finally looked up from his job to look over at Hanji´s pile, his nose wrinkled slightly in disdain. "Good to see that you were smart enough to see that Shitty-Glasses' clothes need special treatment and segregation from anything else." He looked back down on the gigantic shirt in his hands and started rinsing it again. I smiled slightly and walked over to the pile, shuddering slightly as I noticed just how dirty it all was. Did Mayor Hanji switch clothes every blue moon?

Since Hanji never used white clothing but only out washed old clothes it was okay to put it all in one tub. Petra´s had needed a small wall to be put in the tub to separate the colored pants from the white shirts and other pants. My hands felt sticky after I put the clothes down. Some of the clothes had dried food and chemicals on them and one of the pants had dried blood on it and a pantleg that was badly sewed back on. I really began to wonder how my superior was still alive, some of the holes were clearly made from some form of sulfur and smelled like rotten eggs.

Pumping scalding water over the clothes I got the same soap from before, measured it and smiled slightly as I noticed the cup had its own measurement on the back near the handle. "Hanji-level dirty" and "Expedition dirty" as well as "Levi dirty". Levi´s level indicated that it was only needed to have a slight amount of soap. Probably since he never really got dirty, the only exception may be when it was an expedition or raining if Hanji´s babbling was correct.

I stood there for some time, feeling Levi glancing at me from time to time as he finished some rinsing or when he walked into the room next to us to dry the clothes. I would hear him beat the crap out of some clothes form the room next to the one I was in since there was a door leading into the room right next to the rinsing tubs.

Finally done with washing Hanji´s clothes I let out a relieved sigh and let the cork out, so the water would seep down the drains. Once again, I carried the clothes over to the rinsing area, however, before I could start my captain came around the door corner and stopped me. "It will take ages to rinse those clothes, take Petra´s and then hang them up, they should go faster to rinse since she does not make hers dirty on purpose." I smiled at him and went to the tub containing Petra´s clothes. Levi took Hanji´s now clean clothes and emptied them from the basket into a tub right next to me. The rinsing tubs were shallower but the still reached just below Levi´s shoulder blades.

Turning over to Petra´s clothes I began to pump cold water over them form the water pump. I was slightly surprised, and Levi seemed to notice, "Most of the soldiers sweat like animals so we clean the clothes in warm water and then rinse it in cold water to get rid of the sweaty scent." Levi put one light green shirt with holes in it into the cold water, "If I notice that the sweaty spots do not go away I tend to use vinegar or baking soda depending on what our budget is." He let out a tsk as he noticed another hole in one of Hanji´s pants, one between their legs from constant rubbing against a saddle. This is exactly why I used pants with leather between the legs when I rode horses.

Nodding I went back to rinsing the clothes 3/4ths done. It went fast, just like Levi said they would. "I will go and hang these Heichou." Levi of course just grunted and glared at Hanji´s socks who I could see would soon need replacement from constant use. I walked over to the door right next to my tub and carried the hamper filled with Petra´s clothes over to the next room.

The room was like the other. Cold. But had a lot of racks and was much larger. The ceiling was decorated with clothes hanging from racks and from ropes. Most of the clothes here were dark in color and I noticed that there was a sign on the wall with an angry red arrow (probably added by Levi) pointing at the text.

Any lightly colored clothing, sheets, towels and so on, is to be hung outside since dark clothing will be bleached by the sun. No clothing is to be hung outside in the winter or in extreme pollen season. Things are color-coded in this room for a reason even if the clothes have labels on them.

"Aaah. I get it." So, I once again separated dark and light clothing before hanging up Petra´s in the area with red racks and rails so I would know what is what. I, of course, did not hang anything outside since it was pollen season and I did not want to bombard Petra with pollen in her clothes, it would bother Levi. It would also be cruel to Petra, she wasn´t necessarily mean, just cautious, and for good reason.

Captain Levi came into the room carrying a stupid amount of clothes in hampers. Ignoring his glaring I came rushing to him and helped him carry and hang it all up. Levi would occasionally stop me, so he could adjust what I had hung up, so it would fit his vision perfectly. No words were exchanged. It was not needed.

*time skip*

Levi POV:

Eren looked at me nervously as I readied the rope and soap. He was holding a bucket with lukewarm water; his shoulders bore a light green towel. I could see the conflict in his amber eyes. Both Hanji and I were his superiors. Hanji was in charge of the experiments that might hurt him, but I was the one that was in charge of him. Hanji was the one that joked around with him, but I was the one that checked up on him after he hid away in his cell. Hanji was the one that calls him their "baby titan", but I was the one who would keep quiet about his ice magic. He knew I could easily use that against him, or just beat the living crap out of him.

I held up three fingers and counted down, ready to kick down Hanji´s door. 1-2-3!

Raising my leg up I kicked down the door with all my might right where the handle was. The metal hurt my toes, but the door was down in a split second. "SHITTY-GLASSES! BATH TIME!" Hanji turned to Eren and me, their hands in a bowl filled with purple goo, a jar of human nails right next to the bowl. Their mouth was in the form of an O.

Running forwards, I jumped them, tying them up with my rope. "Jaeger! Over here!" Eren blushed deeply and trod carefully over to me as I held down a cackling Hanji who was wiggling around on purpose shouting, "I don't need a bath! I am as clean as a cat!" I sniffed at them, "A cat licks itself clean. You are disgusting."

Eren put down the bucket next to me and makes sure to be out of kicking range.

Ripping off Hanji´s shirt and pants I scowl as I noticed they were covered in the purple goo. I saw that Hanji, and somehow their underwear was covered. The scientist wiggled their greasy eyebrows, "Oy Levi, didn´t know you were so sexually frustrated that you would go after me." Their smirk made me want to kick them, instead, I took off the rest of the clothing and snorted as Eren squawked behind me.

Taking out one of my emergency clothes I dipped it in the water and rubbed soap all over it. "Stay still Shitty-glasses, I will show you what clean means!" Hanji roared with laughter and wiggled around knowing it was pissing me off. They had no problem with nudity, they would go around naked if it didn´t bother anyone, they have done so on expeditions when someone needed dry clothes.

I growled and scrubbed Hanji´s oily hair, going all the way to the scalp. "Hoho! I didn´t know you were so dirty-minded Heichou!" I held them down and continued to scrub. I never had any problem with nudity either, I was after all born in the underground with hookers and whores of both genders walking the streets. I even had been in that business myself when it was hard getting food and clean water. Not that I wanted to go into that line of work, it wasn´t fun. Plus, Kenny taught me how to fight for what I want, not that it helped when no one else had anything to take. Taking on disguises for my "business", it would not do my reputation good if anyone recognized me as the Rooster Racer. Now that I think about it, it is a wonder I don´t go to sleep under the AIDS memorial blanket each night.

Eren looked nervous as hell as he watched me scrub my co-worker squeaky clean. It looked like he wished that the ground would swallow him whole, so he could escape from this scene. Not that I could blame him, this must be one of the strangest things he must have been dragged into.

"Is this a bad time to interrupt?" Eld was standing there in skimpy red underwear, covered in tanning oil, sunglasses on his head and his red tanning towel under his arm. In the towel, I could see the signs of a jar filled with oil, wrapped into it. The tanning oil that he used to fry himself in the sun.

He had his ridiculous red flipflops on that would never stay on in case he would need to run, they would probably fly right off and thus fail at their job as footwear. Hanji always liked them though.

Eld shifted and I noticed that he had a thing behind his back wrapped in brown paper. I raised an eyebrow at him and continued to scrub Hanji with my cloth´s and soap. Their excited and entertained shrieks continued, and I shouted over it all calmly, "No, no problem. What is it?" I dodged a kick as Hanji automatic kicked when I scrubbed them underneath their foot, their ticklish spot. It was filthy, and it struck me that they must have run around in the woods barefoot without cleaning them in the slightest later.

"Well, I was going to ask Hanji if they knew where Eren was but looks like I don´t have to." I eyed him with a look that told him to stop stalling and that I had much more important matters to attend to. Like cleaning Hanji.

Eld turned to Eren, "I was going to say sorry for being too unnecessarily cold to you. It was totally unfair, so I made you a mug" he handed Eren the wrapped-up thing, the so-called mug. "I was also going to ask you if you wanted to go tanning with me on the roof and tell me how you made those flower crowns." He looked nervous, and for good reason.

Eren looked surprised and touched before he began to take away the brown wrapping. A nice mug soon emerged. "It is made of clay and milk, burned in a hot stove. I used real leaves for the pattern. All-natural." It was an earthy color with the imprints of leaves, the imprints slightly darker thanks to the burning in the stove Eld probably used. It was made with care.

I knew Eld could at times qualify as a hippie and a love-for-everyone attitude (and at times a nudist), but this was special. He apologized to Eren by giving him one of the special mugs that only the closest to him got. Eld wanted to get to know the little pup. Hange "awww"-ed underneath me as they wiggled when I scrubbed them.

Eren had a dorky smile on his face that made me smile a little bit. The young man always had an expressive face, his eyes open for what he actually felt if one cared to look. He looked so devoted to everything he did, and he seems to actually have a good reason to join the scouts. Some just did it to die, some did it to become a "good" person, others since their friend joined or because they didn´t get into the MP´s and that wall work was not their jam. Eren, however, had a similar drive as me, his background was similar too. Without even knowing me for long he seemed to understand me so well.

Sure, he was impulsive and a wildcard with a stubborn streak, but so was I in some way.

I have a feeling I like him, and that scared me. He was so young, and I was not exactly the youngest stallion in the ranch, although a well trained one. I was not exceptionally smart, or rich, or the one with the best background, or the most affectionate. If he even felt the same way would I be able to deliver him anything that he can´t get from someone else?

Eren is of a lower military rank, he is "owned" by me. While I don´t care what others think it could cause some suspicion and uncertainty if I could kill Eren. I could, of course. Eren is by the law an adult. He can make his own decisions and has enough experience of the harsh world to understand what he wants, so maybe I should just see what happens.

Said brat then looked at me with puppy-dog eyes. Letting out a sigh I gave half a nod to him, "Go ahead brat, I can do this on my own from here on." Hange let out a screech as I worked on their disgusting toenails, "Make sure you are careful though" Hange let out a giggle as Eren shone brighter than the sun and bounced up to follow Eld as the veteran walked out the door.

I finished cleaning Hange´s toes and was stopped by them taking my hand and sitting up, a shit-eating grin on their face. Our eyes met, and I knew Hange would say something that would both be true, but not something I want to hear.

They wiggled their eyebrows, "Sooo, Eren huh?" their eyes glinted, "Like fresh meat?"

I breathed through my nose harshly and my cheeks puffed out from the air I stored thereafter their comment. Hange had hit right at home, spot-on, was it obvious that I liked Eren? Oh no, what if this causes trouble for the brat?

I gave them a cold glare and hissed before ripping my hand out of theirs, crossing my arms as I sat in a crouch next to them. Oddly enough my joints felt better than ever since the titan brat came, I would usually get a weak forewarning from my body telling me not to crouch for more than a couple of hours. There is no way the brat has been using magic on me, is it?

"I have no idea what you are babbling about Hange. Maybe I washed off all the intelligence leaving behind the real you?" Hange straightened their glasses and smirked, knowing I knew what they knew. "Oh, I am talking about how you look at the newest member like you want to snuggle up to him and protect him from the world." I huffed and sniffed the air, absently noting how that was such an Auruo thing to do. The next thing I know I will be biting my own tongue.

"How did you know so fast?" it was no use in trying to deny it any longer. Hange was a scientist, it was their job to observe and figure things out. It was no wonder they used their talent outside titan studies as well. They have been trying to hook me up with half of the people we meet while trying "subtly" to make the stranger think they have a shot on me.

Hange dried themselves up in the light green towel I handed them before wrapping themselves up in it before sitting down next to me. "Your eyes lit up from the moment you noticed his desire and reason to join the Survey, Erwin told me how your eyes had shone when Eren told you why in the cell." They smiled as I groaned at the fact that Erwin freaking knew, "You are not as harsh on him as you could be on one who suddenly comes and has titan powers. You protect him more than needed. You give him a chance and you never insult him too much." They giggled, "At first I was unsure if it was a father-son bond, a master-pet bond or a lover-bond, but I have a feeling Jaeger is good at picking up unsaid and hidden signals and the way he acts around you shows signs of the possibility of this becoming more."

I froze, and everything seemed to tunnel out, "You really think so?" realizing I didn't insult them I added "Shitty-glasses" after a second.

My college smiled broadly and clapped me on the back, "I think so Shorty, be careful and approach this situation with secrecy, we have no idea how the others or the government would react."

3 POV:

Outside the door, fierce amber eyes widened before the person bolted quietly.

Please review. It gives me joy and if you ever get any ideas please leave them there. =P