Dear Roy,

We…did it.

I literally don't even know where to start. Me and Al have talked and talked until he lost his voice (hasn't used those vocal cords in a while!), and I still can't believe it all. It's over, but I can't stop thinking about that day. I guess, being in the hospital still, I don't have a whole lot else to do but think.

That, and I really…well, I know you're in the hospital too, and I haven't seen you. Even if I did, I don't know if I would say all this. But I just want to talk to you about what happened. So, ah…here goes.

We were fighting those mannequin soldiers underground when you finally came around. I was glad they weren't real homunculi, you know, how they couldn't regenerate? But seeing how many there were, and add that to the fact that they ate people…I wasn't sure we were going to make it out. I'd sealed up the doorway, trying to keep them from getting to the surface. I was ready to die to make sure no one up above got hurt, ready to be beaten before we ever got to Father.

And then the doorway exploded. Even before I saw you, I knew you'd done it. Who else, right? And, fuck does it make me sound weird as hell, but I've never been so relieved to hear a voice before. You called me "Fullmetal." Which, duh, you always do, but…I guess since I've been writing these letters using your first name, and not seeing you for so long, made it a surprise to me. I was expecting you to call me "Edward."

Either way, you had to show off a little and burnt away the mannequins like they were nothing. Not that I'm complaining—okay, maybe I am. But I'm also grateful.

Then Envy showed up. I would say I was as sorry as you to learn he'd killed Hughes, but somehow I think you were a lot worse off than I was. When you were fighting Envy, you had such raw power. It was impressive, a little hot, and…scary. That's why, even though you sent me on my way, I had to come back and find you before you killed him.

The Lieutenant could see it, and so could I; if you had ended Envy, a part of you would have died, too. And I couldn't lose you, even to yourself.

Envy's suicide was better than that, even thought it was still awful. Despite all he'd done, in the end he was just pitiful. Just jealous of us humans. A long time ago, I wouldn't have understood, but now I do; there's so much we have that's worth being jealous of.

You and I were together, then, looking through the tunnels to try to find Father. I hope you didn't notice, between the banter, how awkward I felt. Like, my mind has been working against me when it comes to you, and being so close to you after that was…strange. Nice, though. You know, until I was yoinked through a giant eyeball and all.

When I was reassembled, Al and my dad and my teacher were all there, too. I was horrified to see Father had managed to gather us sacrifices, but I couldn't help being glad to see everyone. Even though we were in a tough spot, it felt like we still had a chance. Especially because Father was down one sacrifice.

Until you reappeared, as well. Blind. Just like with the others, it was good to have you nearby again—I'm a fucking sap—but…the cost. When me and Al tried to transmute our mother and failed, I experienced the ultimate sorrow. Seeing you, having been forced into committing the same sin, was a close second.

And with that, Father had what he needed. I thought it was all over, when we saw him in his new body, sitting there. Like God.

It was a bit of a surprise that my dad was the one to break the spell of hopelessness. When he managed to free the souls of Amestris, so they could go back to their bodies…knowing that everyone outside the circle was okay, in that moment, made me feel like there was still something worth fighting for.

So I did. You all went a different way, while I handled Pride. In the end, he wasn't so different from Envy. In fact, I wonder if, deep down, all the homunculi wanted nothing more than to be human. In a sense, Pride will get to do that. Using my energy, I broke him down until—just like Envy with his true form—he was nothing but a little baby. Harmless. Hopefully, he'll have a better go the second time around.

Of course it wasn't over. There was still Father to contend with. Even without the souls of Amestris, he was still too much. We were giving him everything we had, and none of it fazed him.

It was pretty ingenious, you using the Lieutenant as your eyes so you could rejoin the fight. Side note, it is so damn unfair that you now have flame alchemy and you don't need transmutation circles. It's a good thing you're, ya know, a good dude, or you'd be way too fucking overpowered.

With all that, wearing Father down…he lost the power of God. But the explosions threw us all about, and I got stabbed through the only arm I had left. Truly, I thought we were done for at that point. Luck had finally given up on our band of heroes.

Then Al swoops in and saves the day.

I…was so angry. At Al for risking his soul for my stupid arm, at us for ever getting into this mess, and at Father. Conveniently, he was right there for me to take it all out on.

Wish I could say that rage was enough, that I finally took down Father with my skill, but really Greed's the one we should all be thanking. His unexpected willingness to die for the cause was the only reason Father could be destroyed. Funny, I didn't think I'd be missing a homunculus, but I'll never forget him. I know Ling won't either.

For everyone else, that was it. It was over. But for me, it wasn't. I had to save Al.

I'll say one thing for Father; he gave me the answer to the problem of my brother's body. If it weren't for him using us, I'd never have thought of the idea that we each have our own Gate of Truth, let alone that I could give mine up.

And that's exactly what I did. I gave up my Gate, and therefore my alchemy, in order to get Al's body back—couldn't get my leg, but hell, that's not a big deal. At least he'd gotten me my arm.

It's hard, because…well, all I've ever been is an alchemist. That's ended now. But it was beyond worth it for my little brother to be truly alive again.

Now, though…well, once we are discharged, we'll be heading back to Risembool. My time as a dog of the military is over. I don't know if I'm glad or not. If I could still be a State Alchemist, with the new regime…well, I'll never know what I'd have chosen. As it is, I'll have to find some other path to follow.

It is sad to think I won't get to work with you anymore. Without that, I…won't really have a reason to talk to you in person. And that's aside from the fact that I'll be in a totally different town. I've been trying not to think about it; the idea makes me more upset that I care to admit.

At the very least, I'll stop by to say goodbye when we're on our way out. I couldn't bear not to do that.

-Ed