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10 years before…
Still in his best suit David rushed down the trail by the lake looking for Robin. No one had seen him in hours. After the funeral he'd all but disappeared and David's mother was worried. And David didn't blame her. He and Robin had never been close. Sure they were cousins but they didn't have much in common, they didn't run in the same circles at school. They didn't talk much. But the way he'd looked at his father's funeral…
He needed to find him, make sure he was okay.
One of the waitresses at the Golden Arrow said he'd come in earlier but didn't stay for long. After an hour or two of driving through town he'd finally spotted his truck at the baseball field near the lake. He remembered Robin saying he and Regina used to have a special spot there. It wasn't long before he found him, sitting near the roots of a tree with at least four empty cans of beer near his feet and another in his hand. He was still dressed in his outfit from the funeral, his tie unraveled around his neck as he tilted his head back to drink another gulp of alcohol.
David sighed. "Damn it." Cautiously, he approached his cousin. "Robin…"
Startled, Robin looked up at him a mix of surprise and shame in his bloodshot eyes. As he lowered the can from his lips, his expression turned sour. "What the hell are you doing here?"
His words slurred together and David grimaced, realizing how drunk he already was. "Looking for you. You left the funeral and didn't tell anybody. Mom's worried."
Robin huffed, looking away. "I'm fine."
"Clearly," replied David, eyeing the case of beer next to the tree. "You shouldn't be drinking Robin."
"And who's gonna stop me?" scoffed Robin, glaring at him. "Mom's dead, Dad's in the ground too and the love of my life is off at college." He snapped open another can of beer. "There's literally no one left who cares."
David tried not to let that comment sting. True, they weren't friends but they were still family. Of course, he cared.
Robin took another gulp of beer, then sighed heavily. "You wanted to make sure I was okay. I'm okay. You can go now."
"You really think I'm gonna leave you out here to down a whole case of beer by yourself?"
"Yeah, unless you plan to join me."
"I'm not gonna do that, Robin."
"Then you can fuck off David!" snapped Robin. "I buried my father today! I don't have parents anymore! So as far as I'm concerned if I wanna drink 'til I can't feel anymore that's my goddamn right but I'm not gonna do it with you standing over my shoulder all night!"
His words were sharp and angry as they echoed across the lake, making David flinch.
Robin sucked in deep breath, reaching for another can of beer. He held it out to his cousin. "You have to option Dave. You can sit here and drink or you can judge me and leave but that is it."
David gulped, hesitating as he stared at his cousin, barely recognizing the person in front of him. His face was angry but his eyes seemed hurt. He couldn't leave him alone. Sighing, he accepted the can of beer. "Give me your keys first."
"Fine," Robin mumbled under his breath. He dug his car keys out of his pocket and tossed them at David before dropping down beneath the tree again.
Sighing David, cracked open his beer and joined him. He'd never liked drinking. Family history aside, he liked to keep a clear head. Hopefully, he could get away with nursing one beer for the night and keep Robin from going off the deep end. He'd figure out how to get him home when he passed out.
He didn't know how long they sat there, not speaking. With all the tension it felt like forever. Taking a sip from his can every ten minutes, letting it run lukewarm, David tried to focus on the sound of the crickets and birds rather than the swirling ball of emotion that was his cousin. Sitting beside him, made him feel useless in the worst possible way. They were family. There should be something he could do or say to lessen the pain, at least a little.
"I ruined my whole life." Robin stared at his hands, letting an empty beer can fall to the ground. "I have nothing left."
"That's not true," whispered David.
"It is," replied Robin, nodding his head. "I lost my father. I gave up my spot at college and ruined things with the only girl I've ever loved."
David shook his head. "Hey… it's not your fault you and Regina didn't work out."
"Yes it is," he whispered, choked up. "I told her I never loved her. I sent her away and… now she hates me."
"Oh," breathed David. Damn. He knew Robin and Regina broke up but he assumed it was a mutual thing, like all the other senior couples.
"I miss her," Robin said softly.
"Then call her," urged David. "Tell her what happened. Tell her the truth."
Robin shook his head. "I can't now. It's too late."
No it's not, David wanted to say. It couldn't be. He had a girl he loved, Mary-Margaret. Sure they were just teens but he couldn't imagine a life without her. He had to believe if he screwed up, there would be a chance for him to make it right. And the same had to be true for Robin. No matter how much time passed.
XxXxXxXxXxXxX
David noticed Regina as soon as she'd walked in; Mary-Margaret had pointed her out, surprised she'd shown up. No one expected to see Regina Mills in Storybrooke again. After the news came out that she and Robin broke up, they were sure there was nothing here for her anymore. Though he never spoke it aloud, David thought differently. He always knew Regina Mills would be back. Whether she knew it or not, she had unfinished business here.
With one eye he watched Regina and with the other he watched the door, hoping his cousin would make an unscheduled appearance. Even after ten years, he still rooted for Robin to tell her the truth. He didn't know if Regina would take it well. All he knew is ever since graduation his cousin had been walking around with the weight of a million "what if's" strapped to his back. It was time he unloaded them.
He must've seen distracted because his wife was pushing him toward the crowd, ordering him to mingle in an excited whisper that meant there was no arguing with her. He could've gone anywhere in the gym - caught up with his old football buddies, said hello to the AV Club - but he went straight to her. Almost felt like he had no choice.
She grinned when she realized it was him who tapped her on the shoulder. "David, hi!"
"Hi." He smiled, gesturing toward the dance floor. "Do you want to dance?"
She eyed the dance floor, playfully hesitant. "During a slow song?" She raised an eyebrow. "Think your wife will be alright with that?"
"I think my wife is occupied for the moment." He nodded toward the edge of the dance floor where his wife was currently swaying in the arms of her best friend, Ruby Lucas. "I don't think she'll mind."
Satisfied, Regina nods. "Sure."
She lets David lead her onto the dance floor. Ever the gentleman, he places his in the middle of her back, high enough so there's not even the slightest chance he's getting fresh with her. She could almost chuckle at the amount of effort he's putting into his making sure his intentions come off purely platonic. It reminds her of the days in AP chemistry when always insured three feet of space between them at all times. It's cuter now that he's an adult.
As they swayed to the rhythm of "Viva La Vida" by Coldplay, David looks down at her, sheepish. "It appears I owe you an apology."
She lifts her eyebrows, surprised. "Do you?"
"Yeah…" he drawls, feeling foolish. "I might've made a miscalculation and told Robin you had a love child."
"Thought it might be you who started that rumor," she grumbled. Rolling her eyes, she sighed and shook her head. "It's okay. We're at our high school reunion. A bomb's gonna drop at some point. Not surprised I was everyone's first suspect."
"Well, I'm still sorry," he insisted. "And Robin told me about the adoption. That's amazing."
A glowing smile appeared on her face. "Thanks. Henry is… the love of my life."
He nodded, going silent for a moment before asking, "What was that like? Adopting?"
Her smile dips a little, thrown off by his question. Not quite sure how honest he wants her to be she meanders for a bit. "It was… rewarding but really difficult at first. There were a lot of tough, hard moments but once I found Henry things fell into place for us. And I wouldn't have it any other way."
"That's nice," he mumbles, his eyes dropping to the floor.
Within seconds she can tell she's lost him. Gently squeezing his hand, she tries to pull him back into the moment. "You alright, David?"
"I'm fine," he quickly assures her. "It just… must be nice is all. Having a kid."
She tilts her head at him, curious. "Are you and Mary-Margaret thinking of trying?"
Honestly, she's a little surprised they don't have a gaggle of kids already. She knows that had been Mary-Margaret's plan. She'd wanted to be a mother since she was handed her first baby doll. It was all she'd talked about in high school.
David gulped. "We've been trying for years now." He shrugged. "Haven't had any luck."
"Oh." She tried her best to keep the shock off her face, knowing despite her efforts she'd failed miserably. "I'm sorry."
"No need to apologize," he immediately replied. Unable to stop himself he added, "We've gotten pregnant a few times actually but… they didn't work out." He pauses. "We sort of...lost one just last month."
"Last month?" The words tumble from her mouth before she can hold them back. Her eyes flicker across the dance floor towards his wife, who is still dancing with her best friend, a smile on her lips and blush in her cheeks. She looks so… happy. Regina would never have guessed any differently.
David sighs, eyeing his wife with the same look of wonder as his dance partner. "I don't know how she does it but she always makes it through. She always stays positive." He shakes his head. "I'm not half as strong as her."
Regina swallows hard. David's grip on her waist the only thing holding her up at the moment as memories flash behind her eyes and grief rises up in her stomach. She struggles to push it down. She wants to run away but her body is frozen in place, trapped in this dance and unable to escape. Taking a deep breath she brings herself back into the moment.
"She's compartmentalizing," she says. David looks at her and she shakes her head. "It's only gonna get her so far. One day the dam will break and the emotions will overflow, in some way or another. Let them." Biting her lip, she pauses. "Dealing with the loss of a possibility is hard. Especially when there's nothing real for you to say goodbye to."
Filled with sympathy, he narrows his eyes at her. He didn't know why he'd dropped all his baggage at her feet. They'd hardly told a soul about their struggles. But the way she'd spoken to him, the advice she'd given and the easy understanding in her eyes. It all spoke to a truth she'd hadn't said aloud. One she didn't need to. He understood.
The song reached its end and they both let out a subtle breath of relief, knowing their little emotional excursion had reached its end.
"Thanks for the dance," she said, squeezing his hand.
"Anytime," he said, forcing a smile onto his face.
He started to walk away and she called out to him. Ripping her name tag off her chest, she hastily scrawled a phone number beneath her name and pressed it into his hand. "It's the number for the agency I used with Henry." She shrugged. "If you ever want to give them a call…"
"Thanks," he softly replied, staring at the slip of paper with uncertainty. "Maybe we'll think about it."
As he disappeared into the crowd, surely heading back toward his wife, Regina remained where she was, weighted in place by the emotions flooding her heart. Looking around at the disco lights and confetti, hearing the upbeat music she knew she needed to get out of this gym. Everything about it amplified how down she was feeling and after what just happened she really wanted to hug her kid.
Sending Mal a text that she was leaving, she grabbed her denim jacket and headed outside. A warm summer breeze fell over her and she instantly felt better. The distinct smell of Storybrooke - a mix of lake water, cows and wildflowers - hit her nose and she breathed it in, savoring the moment. She'd forgotten how comforting the smell of her hometown could be, how familiar. A part of her regrets staying away for so long but she quickly reminds herself she'd had good reason to stay away.
Looking down the road, she grimaces. It's about a mile to her father's house. Not completely unwalkable but still a pain. Storybrooke is a one-cab kind of town and she doubts Uber has made an appearance here. Crossing her arms, she starts walking. At least she doesn't have to worry about being mugged.
Her pace is decidedly slow. She wants to enjoy this walk, enjoy having a moment alone. She hasn't had one since she'd come back to town.
Tomorrow afternoon she and Henry would be on their way to Boston and surprisingly she was a little sad about that. She doubted she'd ever have a reason to return, not in the immediate future anyway. It was exactly how she'd felt in the days before graduation. She'd been so focused on all the reasons she wanted to leave, she hadn't wanted to dwell on the good things she'd be leaving behind. The clear night sky, all her old classmates, the house she'd grown up in. It was nice to be reminded there were things about her hometown that she actually liked.
But of course, there were some things that she didn't like at all.
Turning the corner onto her street, she stops in her tracks when she sees a blue pickup truck waiting at the end of the block. It's a familiar sight. One she used to run to on weeknights when she'd sneak out of her bedroom window and down the street where her parents couldn't see her climb into her boyfriend's truck.
She doesn't even have to look through the window to know it's Robin. Pausing, she debates whether it's a good idea to address the fact that he's waiting for her. Her dance with David was emotionally draining enough, she didn't need anymore drama on top of that. However, it was her last night in town. And leaving without having one last talk with him didn't sit right at all.
Holding her breath, she traveled around to the driver's side of the truck and knocked on the window. It rolled down and revealed Robin sitting in the driver's seat, a nervous look in his eye.
"Hey."
"Hey."
They stared at each other for a moment, letting the weight of the night fall over them. They both knew anything that happened next, they'd probably remember for the rest of their lives.
"Are you up for a drive?"
"Sure."
Hope you enjoyed this! Please leave a review if you did!
TW: MISCARRIAGE; FERTILITY ISSUES