CHAPTER 2: JAMES TAKES CHARGE
"Well it actually was nice meeting all of y'all,but I think I better head on home right about now. Hopefully when the next school year comes around I can get into the same class as y'all. See you later." Christine sighed and politely decided to excuse herself after she had properly met all of the other kids as she stepped through the music room door and proceeded to leave the school before Linus looked at Charlie Brown and promptly stated with a small smile "Well that seemed to go a lot better than I thought it would Charlie Brown,she actually seems to be an ok girl so far." to which the round headed kid nodded his head and nonchalantly agreed "I could say that myself,she looked like she was on the verge of passing out when she came in here."
"Let's be glad she didn't or else that would have been very awkward for us." Shermy rolled his eyes and gratefully retorted as he playfully fiddled around with a trumpet before Violet lightly chuckled and wondered out of curiosity "I will say that despite her shyness being a little bit of a problem,I wonder if she'd be good for a girl's day out sometime. Like when we all tried to cheer up Marcie after Hans left." to which Marcie immediately showed some support for the idea "I'd say the best time to do it would be anything other than after a tragic event. I think you all remember how that worked out for me."
"Oh we do Marcie,you went all Ceilne Dion back there,and mostly in a pitiful way." Peppermint Patty nodded her head and calmly confirmed that they all remembered that little fiasco while she and Franco were eating some of their leftover lunch before Freida sighed and remarked in response "Speaking of singing I was hoping I could ask her if she wanted to stay for music practice,since the music show is coming up soon." to which Cobra shrugged and nonchalantly retorted "I don't know about that,considering that she looked like a sick patient when she saw all of us,I think she'd have a heart attack if we were gonna ask her to sing."
"Which actually reminds me,shouldn't we get some of these lessons done with so we can head home before it gets dark?" PigPen suddenly perked up and wondered as he looked outside to see that the sun was beginning to set to which Freida nodded her head and happily agreed to do so "Actually I was just about to suggest we do that. Now I know that it's agreed upon that I'm the best singer out of all of us,but I feel that this time we should do something a little different and have James be our teacher." which prompted the boy in question to step to the middle of the room,clear his throat and politely respond "Why thank you for the offer Freida."
"James I never expected you to be a singer,I always thought you were more into dancing rather than singing." Eudora raised an eyebrow and questioned out of slight confusion as James politely corrected the girl "Actually I'm more into musical theater as a whole,since that genre requires an extensive amount of dancing AND singing. I just never really made it known that I was remotely involved in the singing field until Freida asked me to take the role as teacher for today." before he dimmed the lights a little and signaled Snoopy, Andy, Olaf, Gracie and Roger to get some instruments out and for Scheroder to get on the piano.
"Okay ego boy." Lucy lightly chuckled and jokingly whispered to Rattler as she looked at the now dimmed lights before James straightened out his clothes and somewhat nervously asked "So who's ready for some singing lessons? I know most of y'all have already gotten some from Freida and I'm well aware of that,but I feel that as a former banker and now being someone who's big into the world of theater,that I should bring my own spin and analogy here. Because it's actually this analogy of mine that helped me get off the ground myself." to which Freida raised an eyebrow and remarked out of intrigue "Ooh,go on honey."
"I have some music sheets right here that'll show what we're gonna be singing today. Just pass them to the nearest kid and follow my lead when you feel the time is right." James nervously gulped and promptly continued as he handed Claudia a stack of music sheets and allowed her to start passing them before Dominick rolled his eyes and jokingly stated "I think you're really starting to like the role of teacher chap." to which James lightly chuckled in response and continued onward "Now going back to my statement about me being a former banker,that ties into my own personal analogy about singing. Singing is something that should be treated like the most normal,average thing in the country next to free speech,the average bank business,and even the very people in this country. Just think of the average,everyday person and let your voice do your average,everyday thing."
James:
We're plain,clean,average Americans.
A dress from K-Mart.
A Ban-Lon shirt.
We're plain,clean,average Americans.
And we deserve to eat our just dessert.
We're normal boring Americans.
Like most Americans.
And I assert this country will itch to help us get rich.
Our pitch will be slick and expert.
We'll make our cousins the millionaires eat dirt.
"So let me get this straight,you're saying that singing should be approached like an everyday thing,but these everyday things are sounding really boring?" Charlie Brown raised an eyebrow and questioned out of confusion as he looked over his song sheet before Ox looked up and added equally as confused "Like that's really sounding contradictory to the overall class here. What are you getting at?" to which James got a little red in the face and tried to correct himself "Okay maybe I should have phrased this better,the point I'm trying to make is that us being normal kids should be lumped into the same category as singing,that being a normal thing that shouldn't be avoided. The same can be also said for…..say…..an average business. I want y'all to sing out loud what y'all would do to fix a normal business on the verge of shutting down. Try it."
Linus:
Down with the lunatic.
PigPen:
Down with the maniac.
Dominick:
Down with the random giving.
Skylar:
Up with the bank account.
Claudia:
Up with the credit line.
Skylar And Claudia:
Up with our style of living.
Charlie Brown:
Next to the literal eastern establishment.
Charlie Brown And Freida:
Up with its new replacement.
Freida:
Up with the draperies.
Charlie Brown:
Up with the furniture.
Everyone:
Up with the paneled basement.
"Maybe it's because I'm really tired and want to get this done,but it actually feels like I'm getting the hang of it." Dominick happily stated as he started to grow a small grin on his face before Linus nodded his head and agreed "Me too,maybe just singing out normal things without having to worry about other things is making me feel more confident in my singing." to which James pointed straight at the boy and cheerfully retorted "That's exactly the point I'm making Linus. While flow and a great voice is needed in order to be good at singing,the most important thing to me is to not worry about other things in the background,and just let your true self out. That's why I used the business analogy because it's the most normal thing an average person does,and ya'll managed to sing an idea to fix one up perfectly. Let's keep going."
James:
Down with the saccharine.
Sweet generosity.
Down with the ministrations.
Shermy:
Down with the bleeding heart and it's philosophy.
Up with it's poor relations.
Franklin:
Up with publicity.
Up with the interviews.
Up with the whirlwind touring.
James:
Up with the bunting.
Up with the slogan signs.
Up with the underscoring.
We're plain,clean,average Americans.
Drop by the offices in our hotel.
Pick up a leaflet and bumper sign.
Pick up a button for your coat lapel.
God loves these average Americans.
And says their relatives can go to hell.
Everyone:
It's easy to see,he's nuts as can be.
His eyes show he's clearly not well.
But aren't these normal Americans just swell?
"Alright that'll be enough from you James. I'll take charge from here." Freida happily announced as she took the middle of the room and undimmed the lights before she continued while James headed back to his seat "Ok so James's method of giving us singing lessons may be a little more….out there compared to others,but the point still stands that singing is nothing to be afraid of and should be seen as a normal everyday thing,I mean we DO sing all the time the more I think about it. But before we all head home,let's wrap up this little shanty that James has given us,and always remember to keep in mind the tunes we use to build a song that we talked about."
Freida:
So,Do,La,Fa,Mi,Do,Re.
They're plain,clean,average Americans.
He doesn't exercise.
She rarely reads.
Marcie:
They're plain,clean,average Americans.
She stops at traffic lights.
He never speeds.
Peppermint Patty:
They're healthy,homegrown Americans.
Lucy:
Won't touch gefilte fish.
Rebecca:
Or play with beads.
So-
James And Girls:
March with the band.
Your kind,helping hand is all any one of us needs.
This cause will spread through America like weeds.
Everyone:
They're plain,clean,average Americans.
Upright Americans.
He loves the fights.
They both love bowling and basketball.
They don't write symphonies.
They don't wear tights.
They're normal,simple,Americans.
They're not from Darien or Shaker Heights.
And James is an elk.
They love Lawrence Welk.
That's how they spend Saturday nights.
Let's win these average Americans.
Healthy Americans.
Middle Americans.
Let's win these average Americans their rights!
"Ok then I'm oughta here,good night." Dominick happily announced out of relief while he quickly headed out of the music room,with the rest of the kids following shortly afterwards and beginning to head for home,however unbewkowest to all of them Christine was actually behind the music room's window and was listening to them practice the whole time as she somberly said to herself while she started to head for home "Singing huh? That would be nice,but I just don't know."
NEXT CHAPTER: SICK?!
"Plain,Clean Average Americans." Written By Alan Menken and Howard Ashman.
©️Menken Music. Shoptalk LTD. Kurt Vonnegut.